The Night Santa Went Crazy [Concluded]

**Double A** · 12-29-2009, 03:14

If pizza gets a vote, I do too.

vote: Pizza

**Askthepizzaguy** · 12-29-2009, 17:41

That's enough time; round has concluded.

Please, everyone refrain from commenting until the writeup is posted.

**Askthepizzaguy** · 12-29-2009, 20:29

Twas the fifth night of mischief, since the slayings began
And one of the reindeer had hatched a master plan
One that would end Nick's murderous spree
And end in a wond'rous New Year reindeer jamboree
"It is time to fight back" the head reindeer said
"If we don't, my companions, we'll all end up dead."
The others nodded, and they were in agreement
They would all put an end to their brethren's pain and torment.
While Santa was busy, arguing with his wife
One of the reindeer confiscated a knife
Another, a Smith and Wesson model 19
The third, a flamethrower, to cause damage extreme
They plotted their escape from their broken pen
Never to return to that same hellish den
They went out to the frozen lake near the pole
And hid nearby with the weapons they stole.
One of them, however, started tapping the ice
With his hooves rather sharply, in a manner most precise.
And they waited for a while to spring their clever trap
After Santa awoke from his post-domestic-fight nap
He went out to the garage to grab his shotgun
And counted the votes up to see who had won
He went to the pen to slay the crooked deer,
But he saw that the three of them had disappeared!
So he followed their tracks, in the fresh fallen snow
Down to the valley, near the frozen lake below
He followed their tracks to the edge of the lake
And that's when Santa made his fatal mistake
He stepped onto the ice, and began to cross
As the reindeer prepared to ambush their boss
When he was almost across, they sprung their trap
They came from three sides, and then closed the gap
They charged at Santa, their weapons held high
Confident these were Santa's last moments alive
At this point, however, the reindeer felt dumb
They couldn't wield them properly; for they had no thumbs
And so they watched as the evil old Saint Nick
Pumped his deadly shotgun with a chilling "click click"
But fortune was smiling on the poor animals that night
As Santa lost his balance and slipped on the ice
The reindeer charged, their antlers angled low
And pounded Saint Nicholas into the snow
They bashed and they bucked and they bloodied him up
They kicked his teeth in, and his skull was concussed
They rammed him, and shook him, like a bowl full of jelly
They smashed him quite hard in his fat hairy belly
He was knocked back, and slipped once again on the ice
And it was here that Santa paid the ultimate price
He slid to the middle of the frozen lake
Where the ice, already cracked, started to break
The reindeer watched with great expectation
They trotted a bit closer, in joyful anticipation
As beneath evil Claus, the ice split and gave way
(He must have eaten too much Chinese buffet)
Into the icy drink evil Santa Claus splashed
The only thing left of him was his sash.

The reindeer, especially Vixen, breathed a sigh of relief
As he was today's vote-winning suspected thief
"You guys, I promise you, I didn't take the treats
Just the thought of angering Santa made me wet the sheets"
And Comet nodded, in agreement with Vixen
And Dasher observed "Hey, what happened to Blitzen?"
That's right, they remembered, there were nine reindeer
Just where did Blitzen and Donner disappear?
Well naughty Rudolph shipped Donner to Abu Dhabi
And took on his identity, to aid his thieving hobby
But that left Blitzen still unaccounted for
There were only three left, shouldn't there be more?
Too late, it dawned on them, another reindeer was missing
His bloody corpse in a box, all wrapped up with a string
He was shipped to Nick as a morbid Christmas present
By a murderous reindeer, with most malicious intent
The murderer was among them, but which one, and why?
Weren't they all united, as brothers, to make Santa die?
It seems that among them, there was a traitor so shrewd
as to let his brothers all die, just to steal some food
The three remaining deer looked at each other with suspicion
Which one that remained was of evil disposition?
Dasher shook his head and said "It wasn't me,
I'm innocent guys, this I will guarantee"
And Comet spoke up, in a manner most sincere
"I'd never, ever, harm a fellow reindeer"
So they looked at Vixen with accusatory eyes
And said "You killed Blitzen... all traitors must die"
They both charged at Vixen and rammed his furry hide
And across the lake ice, he began to slide
Into the icy water, where he would sink down
Because he couldn't swim, and thusly, he drowned.
So Dasher and Comet nodded at one another,
Confident they had lynched their murderous brother
And Comet laughed, as Dasher jumped on the ice
Their nightmare now over, their future sure looked nice.
Comet warned Dasher to please be cautious;
The ice was still thin, and those jumps made him nauseous.
But Dasher looked at him with a cold, icy stare
And snorted, and tapped his hoof on the ice, with a glare.
The ice underneath them started to crack
And Comet lost his footing and fell on his back
Dasher dashed off to the safety of the snow
As the integrity of the ice sheet started to go
With a shout, Dasher shouted "You can die like Vixen,
THAT ONE WAS FOR RUDOLPH, AND MY NAME IS BLITZEN!"
And with a laugh, an evil laugh, Blitzen blitzed off
No longer would he eat like a pig at a trough
He could dine all day on sweet Christmas kibble
He'd never have to argue for his fair share, nor quibble
Blitzen could eat and eat until he had his fill
It was his greedy appetite that caused him to kill
He and Rudolph were finally fed up with the swill
It was time to send Scrumptious to an old puppy mill
And dispose of Mrs. Claus, with her voice so shrill
He'd slash her to bits, and make her blood spill
(It seems that murdering gave Blitzen a cheap thrill)
He'd bury her carcass up on the old snowy hill
And inherit the workshop, as it said in Santa's will
Which of course, Blitzen forged, with his clever forging ways
And he'd retire, fat and rich, happy for the rest of his days.

CONGRATULATIONS, DISOBEDIENT REINDEER!!!

WELL DONE, CENTURION1 AND JOHNHUGHTHOM!!!

Alive: 1

Johnhughthom- Blitzen, AKA "Dasher"

Dead: 6

Double A- Prancer
Death is yonder- Cupid
Centurion1- Rudolph, AKA "Donner"
Captain Blackadder- Dancer
Yaropolk- Vixen
Joooray- Comet

Ho ho ho.....

**Askthepizzaguy** · 12-29-2009, 20:39

Here are all the role PMs, which admittedly I didn't put a lot of extra effort into making. Only the disobedient reindeer's roles are read-worthy. The disobedient reindeer did not know each other, thus making it harder on them and easier on the obedient team.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: