Paradise

[Ianofsmeg16]

Here's a story I'm writing, based on my little group of friends in a fictional plot. The titles are based on songs i like, and i hope have some relevence to the chapter

Chapter 1 - Outside (part one)

I'm on the Outside
I'm Looking in
I can see through you
see your true colours
'Cos Inside your ugly
Ugly Like Me
I can see through you
see the real you

"Every child must go through a right of passage, if they do not, the boy will never become a man, and the girl will never become a woman." The Teacher looked at the rabble that had congregated in the P.E classroom, he sighed, when the staff had planned this trip, and elected Mr. Dunn as the leader, they had in mind the only people that could be bothered to sign there names down on such a trip were the fittest of the fit and the bravest of the brave. They had not counted on Jonny.

Big Jonny Stanley, 6ft tall and 14 stone could certainly not be called the fittest of the fit, far from it in fact, but there were two things that drove Jonny and his group of friends to participate in the school trip in two months. First of all Jonny had enormous pride, and when some other kids were laughing at him, saying he was fat and could never take part in such an expedition he jumped at the chance to prove them wrong. Second, Jonny had enormous persuasive power, thus he turned up on Saturday morning with 12 of his friends all begging for the chance to be included in the expedition.

The trip was sold to these kids by telling them that they had the chance to stay two weeks in a luxury hotel in Salt Lake City, it was only after they had agreed to the trip that Mr. dunn sprang the "Right of Passage" speech on them.

"Every child must go through a right of passage, if they do not, the boy will never become a man, and the girl will never become a woman." He repeated, slowly taking in everyone in the room "The trip you have decided to take part in will, as stated on your letter, culminate in a two week holiday in a five-star hotel, but too get this holiday you must..." He paused. Then smiled.

"...You must walk from Las Vegas"

Hope you like
Will continue this chapter if good feedback and advice is heard, or if i'm bored

[littlelostboy]

Please continue, it sounds quite interesting. To walk from one place to another, hmm, in a group or alone?

[Ludens]

Interesting proposition. I'd sure like to read more.

Is Mr. Dunn the teacher or is that someone else?

[Ianofsmeg16]

Interesting proposition. I'd sure like to read more.

Is Mr. Dunn the teacher or is that someone else?

Mr. dunn is the teacher organising it

[Ianofsmeg16]

Chapter 1 - Outside (part 2)

"...You must walk from Las Vegas"
There was a mixed reaction towards this, Jonny's group were a mixture between surprise, understanding and absolute horror. While the group of year 12s in the back corner just grinned, no emotion, just one type of smile between the 12 of them. In fact Mr. Dunn was a bit dissapointed at their reactions, so he continued to explain, hoping to frighten them with their own ideas of what awaited them.

"You will start by spending a night in the desert, camping in your groups and getting to know each other, then it's off to Utah, in your own direction, in fact the only thing we're gonna give you is the destination, some water and a shove in whatever direction we see fit."

The hand of Olly Swales shot up in the air "You mean that, y-you aint comin with us?" He said with a slight stutter.

"Shut-up Olly" Huge, rugby player Adam Jones said "Of course there's gonna be a teacher with us."

"Um, on the contrary Adam, you will be on your own" smirked Mr. Dunn "Still wanna go everyone?" He had to wait perhaps two seconds for the answer.

"Yes."

I know its a tad short, but i cant be bothered to wright much as i have a history essay to write AND Tests to revise for, so i promise more tomorrow and it gets better trust me...

[Ludens]

Is there more to come?