101 Things We've Learned From Videogames

**TevashSzat** · 12-01-2008, 21:13

I was just browsing gamesradar and found this excellent list.

Some highlights:

3. If you’re 14, have hair covering your eyes and live in a small village, man up, because you’re going to have to save the world.

4. Medicine became obsolete in the year 2004, when doctors noticed that hiding behind a wall caused human health to regenerate to 100%.

6. Sometime in the future, Earth will be menaced by hordes of alien spacecraft that fly in predictable patterns and can be killed in one hit. The logical course of action will be to despatch one brave hero in an untested plane/tank/spaceship to take them all on without help.

19. If you’re stuck in life and don’t know what to do, simply attempt to use every single item in your possession on your obstacle. If none of them work, go back the way you came. You’ve clearly missed something.

23. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t gain experience and knowledge by education and hard work. You get it from wandering around the countryside killing wildlife.

40. Everyone speaks English, including Nazis, aliens and the living dead.

57. Explosives are not stored, as you might expect, in secure containers in controlled environments, but in barrels that are littered around combat zones at random. Highly-trained evil soldiers are quite happy to engage in sustained fire-fights while standing next to them.

**drone** · 12-01-2008, 22:11

39. Roman and medieval generals had a zoomable and rotatable 3D view of the battlefield, and controlled their soldiers by clicking giant arrows.

What games could they possibly be talking about here?

**Mailman653** · 12-01-2008, 23:12

53. Prostitutes will judge you on the fanciness of your car and give you 25% bonus health post-sex. This is only in the pre-AIDS ’80s. In 2008, you will be tsk-ed at by an Eastern European, which makes you feel sick and guilty, even though you’ve been stabbing people all day.

So true! Theres lots of other funny ones as well.

**Gregoshi** · 12-01-2008, 23:13

Good stuff!

If only...

**seireikhaan** · 12-01-2008, 23:40

97. Frogs die in water.

good list.

**Husar** · 12-02-2008, 09:13

Really liked it.

**Quirinus** · 12-02-2008, 17:28

70. Even cyborgs/ninjas/special agents able to smash whole cities with their fists and defeat the mightiest opponent in close combat are stumped when confronted with a locked door or box, and have to go find the key.

95. You can probably fit another rocket launcher in your rucksack if you carefully rearrange those four ammo clips and that coke can.

These two are my favourites. Never did understand the logic for a limited inventory space, since it's invariably more than can be logically carried under that very thin leather thong anyways.

**Crazed Rabbit** · 12-03-2008, 02:09

80. Flashlights only last for one minute, but thankfully recharge themselves over time.

So true.

91. The owners of theme parks/zoos/hospitals are able to pick up visitors to their attractions with a giant grapple, and drown them in lakes without penalty.

Heehee

CR

**Bob the Insane** · 12-03-2008, 21:34

19. If you’re stuck in life and don’t know what to do, simply attempt to use every single item in your possession on your obstacle. If none of them work, go back the way you came. You’ve clearly missed something.

Unintentionally deep insight...