View Full Version : The Immature Jokes Thread.
spankythehippo
09-13-2012, 14:49
Everyone loves 'em.
Now let's get this started.
Why did the mushroom go to the party?
Because he was a fungi
What's red and sits in the corner?
A naughty strawberry
Why did the baker's hands smell?
He kneaded a poo
stratigos vasilios
09-14-2012, 09:37
Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing
What did one plate say to the other?
Lunch is on me
What did the eye say to the other eye?
Just between us something smells
and the lucky last a 5 year old told me...
What makes a man go?
A mango!
spankythehippo
09-14-2012, 09:49
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot
What's brown and sticky?
A stick
Why do eagles go to church?
Because they're birds of prey
What do you call the children of the Tsar of Russia?
Tsar-dines
What do you call an octopus that can tell the time?
A clocktopus
Why did the beach blush?
Beacause the sea-weed
The Stranger
09-15-2012, 11:43
this one is a bit related to holland.
it is yellow and when it hits you in the eye, you are dead. what is it?
a train (dutch national trains are yellow)
In the same vein, what's yellow and goes back in time?
The train to Limburg
SwordsMaster
09-15-2012, 14:06
In the same vein, what's yellow and goes back in time?
The train to Limburg
Heh, try the Maastricht-Liege one. Top notch XVIII century technology.
gaelic cowboy
09-15-2012, 21:22
Q. “Well, Mike,” said the doctor. “I can’t quite diagnose your case. I think it must be the drink.”
A. “Sure, that’s all right, doctor,” said Mike. “I know how you feel. I’ll come back when you’re sober.”
Q. Why are Irish jokes so simple?
A. So the English can understand them.
Q: What is the difference between BSE and PMT?
A: One is mad cow disease while the other has something to do with beef.
Q: Did you hear about the morning-after pill for men
A: It changes your blood group
Q: Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip.
A: To get to the same side
spankythehippo
09-16-2012, 03:48
Q: Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip.
A: To get to the same side
This one had me laughing.
Why are men with beards more honest?
Because they can't tell bare-faced lies
Where would you find a rubber trumpet? (no sexual innuendos here)
In an elastic band
What gets bigger the more you take out of it? (again, no sexual innuendos here)
A hole
What happened to the man who stole a truck load of prunes?
He was on the run for months
Montmorency
09-17-2012, 01:15
Science is just a method though
I'll have you know science has been clean for a year; have some respect.
In the same vein, what's yellow and goes back in time?
The train to Limburg
I'll just admit I laughed, I bet our spare-flemish don't like it hehe
spankythehippo
09-17-2012, 14:16
How do you make a bandstand?
Hide all their chairs
What nuts can be found in space?
Astronuts
What does the sea say to the sand?
Not much. It mostly waves
How do you make an apple puff?
Chase it around the garden
What did the policeman say to his stomach?
You're under a vest
Aaaaaaand finally, I've saved the best till last.
What did the mother toaster say to her son when he came in after midnight?
Wire you insulate?
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