Cheating

[mercian billman]

Last week my 16 year old cousin emailed me with a problem. His problem was he had a girlfriend but cheated on her. He wrote he felt bad, and all the rest. He asked what I thought about and my reply was,

Well Brian (name changed to protect the innocent) it really doesn't matter if you cheated on your girlfriend. By having pre-marital sex you've already cheated on god.

If it's advice you want I suggest you consider who's being cheated here. The only person being cheated is your girlfriend obviously you and the new chick are having fun from all this and 2 out of 3 ain't bad http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

God really doesn't care if you have sex with 1 person or 1 million if your not married he's pretty damn angry.

Do you guys think this is good advice? All my friends tell my it's horrible and you should be faithful to your women etc. but seriously these are the same guys that dump their girls when a better looking girl shows intrest http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-inquisitive.gif

I think the org patrons are sufficiently more mature, and would be better able to judge the quality of my advice.

[Ja'chyra]

The boy's only 16, give him a break.

If your God is going to send him to burn in hell for experimenting when he's young maybe he should consider changing religions.

I think you were way too harsh.

[mercian billman]

I was being a little sarcastic here http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif Did you read the second paragraph? http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-jester.gif

Poor lad is probably more confused than ever http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wacko.gif

[Ja'chyra]

On the other hand, if God is already angry and he is going to hell anyway...............he might as well make the most of it.

[Si GeeNa]

Well, does he have a reason valid sufficiently to cheat?

I mean, if your gal doesn't aqueise(sp) to sex, then its your right as a 16yo kid to cheat

If your gal is just not [bleeped], then its less mitigating.

GAH

http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wave.gif

[Ja'chyra]

Quote[/b] ]I mean, if your gal doesn't aqueise(sp) to sex, then its your right as a 16yo kid to cheat

If your gal is just not [bleeped], then its less mitigating.


Lol, what more can you say to that. http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Hetman_Koronny]

IMO cheating is always wrong. He's hurting the other girl. I know he's 16 and it is all very immature and thus pretty much harmless (hopefully), but...
What is important, I think, is how is your brother going to learn to treat women and relationships. This is where, I believe, you should try to impose values on him. You see what I mean?

Don't chase him with God, unless you are perfectly sure it will make him act this or other way. Don't be sarcastic about it either - the boy should feel some respect.

And foremost keep in mind that it is just my opinion based on my set of values. Your can be different and you should stick to it...

[dessa14]

i never cheat, but that is because im a romantic.
thanks,
desmond

my advice would be to tell him to tread lightly if he wishes to walk this path.
just remember relationship rumours spread like bushfire.

just remember women are sadistic if they find out you've been messing up, and you could end up in alot more trouble then you could possibly believe.
i got into alot of trouble for telling a girl that she was ranting in a school workgroup.

[Beirut]

I will not cheat.

(But the second I get permission, I'm bringing home a another chick for the both of us. http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/smokin.gif )

[KukriKhan]

Steady, Lads. Language. Keep it PG-13.
Thanks.

[The Blind King of Bohemia]

Your only young once. The idea of being loyal to one person in a relationship just baffles me. I like women too much to be loyal to one http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Spino]

I've never cheated on a girlfriend and I don't intend to start. However, I've also never been in a serious, long term relationship (no regrets about that one). Whenever someone else comes along that I fancy I leave the current girl and give chase.

[zelda12]

Not that I have much experience, but I would of said cheating on a girl is very wrong because it can be emotionaly damaging and can scar them emotionaly. Then you should of said, and remember if either of them catch you they'll put your balls in a vice and squeeze. As you can guess singing high soprano at sixteen is not a very pleseant thing.

Thats my advice also if you were being sarcastic about the god thing you should of said. And be sure to watch out in a thunderstorm because Gods got itchy trigger fingers now.

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Having your cake and eating it too...ah, I wish I could do that...

[solypsist]

when your 16 yr old gets married - then it'll be threadworthy.

[Xiahou Liao]

It's wrong. Period.

You should've reprimanded him. Early discipline is the key to success. I'm only sixteen myself and I've had thoughts of my girlfriend's friend...This one...she was wearing a...nevermind.

The point is, I didn't do it, even though she gave me some signs she had intrest in me. I love my girlfriend, we've been together for 9 months on the 17th. I know she doesn't cheat on me because she's either with her mother, her grandparents, her sisters, or me.
I'm even friendly to her 12 year old sister, so I know she would tell me if my girlfriend cheated on me. I can cheat on her, it'd be easy. But I don't want to nor I have the desire.

Your cousin had the desire, and he fell into the sinful lust. I am not religious, I am a humanist. Tell him that if he does not stray from that path, he will lead his life into the dirt and will not become a successful person.
I know someone who's done that to themselves, and now they're in a world of shxt.

I know teenagers will have the desire to hump every good looking girl in their path, including some of the teens will hump anything with two legs that walks.
But the way I prevented my urges for my girlfriend's friend...well you see I'm in luck for my girlfriend is Bi and she likes pr0n. So we looked at it together...Yeah...

Anyway, I know my girlfriend has told me before that while we were embracing together, she accidently imagined I was keenu reeves( with the long hair ) once. Yeah, I did the same but with her friend. :: cough. :: I told her I accidently imagined her as her friend. Lmao. She looked at me funny and agreed she was hot.

But in the end, the point is, I stayed loyal to her and will until our relationship is over. Even then I will still be her friend. But hopefully, the relationship never ends until death...but we'll see how fate has this played out for us.

[ Sorry if my words offend anyone, I was just trying to get my points acrossed moderators https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/handball.gif ]

[mercian billman]

BTW, Im not religous either Im a diest.

I can understand why 16 year olds would want to have sex and be with someone else. I just don't get why people think you have to remain loyal to someone at 16. If you really love the other person then more power to you but, the fact is most 16 year olds (guys mostly) don't really love their girlfriend. Liking someone and loving someone are two different things.

The only person you have to worry about cheating on is your wife. https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/bigthumb.gif

[BDC]

Simple. You, your cousin and some mates go find the guy she cheated with, break his legs, and then tie him naked upside down to a lamp post somewhere remote.

I'm 16 though, nothing is particularly solid or reliable. This is the one time of your life you are allowed to be hopeless and inept. Enjoy it.

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Quote[/b] (BDC @ July 14 2004,23:44)]Simple. You, your cousin and some mates go find the guy she cheated with, break his legs, and then tie him naked upside down to a lamp post somewhere remote.

I'm 16 though, nothing is particularly solid or reliable. This is the one time of your life you are allowed to be hopeless and inept. Enjoy it.
Um...he cheated on his girlfriend, not the other way around... https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

Of course, you may be aware of this and simply be advocating limb-breaking. Either way, I'm cool with it.

[BDC]

Quote[/b] (Big King Sanctaphrax @ July 14 2004,23:53)]
Quote[/b] (BDC @ July 14 2004,23:44)]Simple. You, your cousin and some mates go find the guy she cheated with, break his legs, and then tie him naked upside down to a lamp post somewhere remote.

I'm 16 though, nothing is particularly solid or reliable. This is the one time of your life you are allowed to be hopeless and inept. Enjoy it.
Um...he cheated on his girlfriend, not the other way around... https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

Of course, you may be aware of this and simply be advocating limb-breaking. Either way, I'm cool with it.
Yeah, the important bit is the espirit-de-corps it creates, makes people feel better.

Just make sure he isn't in the mafia or something.

[Don Corleone]

I don't know about this one. If they were just fooling around and not engaging in actual intercourse, that'd be one thing. But ho'ing around can lead to diseases. There's plenty of ways to enjoy being young and widening your sexuality without bringing that level of risk into your and your girlfriend's life.

Not to mention, I'd have to say if you cheat in relationships, you can't say you're an honest person. I'm not saying people who have sex before they are married are immoral, but if you tell somebody 'we're exlcusive' then go behind their back, well, you have limited character in my eye.

[Navaros]

yes fornication is wrong and it ticks God off a lot

however, that is NO EXSCUSE to break someone's heart

no honorable person would cheat.

cheating should be illegal, and carry a minimum 5 year prison sentence. that's how utterly disgusting it is

nothing feels worse then having someone who you love betray you.

only a total A-hole (hopefully that is PG13 if not feel free to edit) would ever cheat. and those A-holes will get what's coming to them. the curses and afflictions God sends for cheating will be far worse than the ones sent for just fornicating

what goes around comes around, to any cheating A-holes who may have read this post

[Lehesu]

Discipline is the key to character and getting what you want from the world. If he can't control his body's sexual urges enough to maintain a relationship, he certainly won't have the restraint to work hard to get what he wants and will not have the restraint needed to make farsighted decisions. I always remind myself that it is my mind that should have the most say in my actions, not my emotions or impetuous urges.

[mercian billman]

A five year sentence for cheating huh?

Seriously Navaros there's some girls who's hearts will broken no matter what. Like when you say tell them you want to break up, they start crying.

Are you telling me it's my fault if my girlfriend cries when I break up with her? Or a girls fault a guy can't move on with his life after he gets dumped?

I think the key to a good relationship is establishing ground rules. For example no cheating would be one, others that I've established in the past are,

-No sex.
-If one of us get's hit in the face with a shovel were done.
-I will not talk on the phone for more than 30 minutes.
-We will not become emotional co-dependents.
-If either of us feels the need to break up for any reason, the other person will respect the desire and we will move on and try to remain amicable with each other.

Thats all I can think of off the top of my head and, no I don't make girls sign a contract https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-jester.gif

[Ja'chyra]

I was feeling a bit down this morning, but this thread has cheered me up no end, keep up the good work.

[mercian billman]

Quote[/b] (Ja'chyra @ July 15 2004,02:32)]I was feeling a bit down this morning, but this thread has cheered me up no end, keep up the good work.
Thanks Ja'chyra https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wave.gif

[LittleGrizzly]

aslong as he wears a condom its all good

[Tachikaze]

Split decision for me.

I think people should stop getting so uptight about sex. They blow it way out of proportion, which is why pornography is such a healthy business.

On the other hand, I think deceiving someone who loves you is a moral crime.

The guy can fool around all he wants to. But he should either leave his girlfriend first or be open to her about seeing others.

He's being greedy and heartless by doing it on the sly.

[rasoforos]

First comment:

I think we have waaaay to many fundamentalists in there...

Second comment:

Ok the guy is just 16 , if he doesnt do it now when is he gonna do it? At that age its your time to experiment , do stuff that you find intriguing. Cheating and having parallel relationships are something most people do at that age , i have done it too. hy do i think this is beneficial? Because you ve been there, done that, bought the t-shirt and you dont find it thrilling anymore when you are an adult and really bond with someone emotionaly.
Ok some other comments , some of you guys say 'no sex' is beneficiary in a good relationship...Have you actually EVER had sex? Well let me tell you that its very important. A partner you are incompatible with is a really bad idea for long term relationships and marriage. Leave that factor to chance and you ve got a perfect recipe for a failed marriage after 3-4 years...believe me good sex from bad sex are lightyears away from eachother.
Another comment is about diseases. You WONT get an STD just by having many partners. You ll get it by being ignorant to the protection needed. To say that abstinence is a solution is like saying that staying at home forever is a solution against traffic acidents.


As for th guy:
Well tell him that what happened has allready happened. Its good that it happened now and not later and its no big deal. Tell him that if God wanted him to have sex only after marriage then he would grow his 'johnson' only after he gets to wear his ring...

[mercian billman]

First off I've never had sex and am proud of my virginity https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-2thumbsup.gif and Im not a fundamentalist, Im a diest.

I personally think sex really isn't that important in a realationship. I mean there are other measures of compatability besides sex and if their not in place the best sex in the world will not keep a relationship going.

Condoms will not prevent all STDs like Herpes and such.

[scooter_the_shooter]

Quote[/b] (mercian billman @ July 16 2004,14:12)]First off I've never had sex and am proud of my virginity https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-2thumbsup.gif and Im not a fundamentalist, Im a diest.

I personally think sex really isn't that important in a realationship. I mean there are other measures of compatability besides sex and if their not in place the best sex in the world will not keep a relationship going.

Condoms will not prevent all STDs like Herpes and such.
thats why i dont plan to do any of that till i am married

[mercian billman]

Good for you Ceaser010 https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/bigthumb.gif

It's good to see more kids turning away from promiscuity and embracing family values https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-2thumbsup.gif Here's a article you'll like which shows you are not alone.

Good News The Kids Are Alright (http://www.techcentralstation.com/071604E.html)

[Tachikaze]

Rasoforos is exactly right. Sexual compatibility is extremely important in a marriage. I am over 40 and have had a lot of experiences of all kinds. I've learned at least two things relevant to this discussion:

1) Sexuality is part of what distinguishes a romantic or nuptual relationship from any other. Being with someone you are not compatible with is miserable. There is a whole crucial area of your relationship that is sour. I stayed in a relationship too long with this situation. Marriage would have been a mistake. And later, when I got to know more women, I realized how much better a relationship could be, and just how compatible two people can be.

2) I had my heyday in my 20s. It was an exciting time. I was very busy and learned a lot about women, relationships, sex, and romance. Those experiences were precious. I am a much better husband today because of it. And, as rasofos was mentioning, I got tired of promiscuity. If I had repressed myself earlier, I would probably be unsettled, curious, and likely to give in to temptation. I might also have self-confidence issues. I might use female attention to help me feel desirable.

I do have one disagreement with rasoforos. Abstinence is the most effective method of avoiding STDs. I am so glad I'm not in the meat market these days My time was safer.

[shakaka36]

i despise cheating, i was once suspended for beating up a guy who had cheated on his girlfriend (i was good friends with the girl)

[rasoforos]

Quote[/b] (Tachikaze @ July 16 2004,19:34)]I do have one disagreement with rasoforos. Abstinence is the most effective method of avoiding STDs. I am so glad I'm not in the meat market these days My time was safer.
Indeed it is but, the overwhelming majority of the kids pretending to follow this practice , actually do not or will not at a point in their lives ( trust me guys , even if your right arm is 3 times the size of your left , when it coems to the real thing you will propably make an exeption). This , in addition to the fact that teaching abstinence usually leads to a severe lack of teaching safe sexual practices leads to 'abstinent' youths having unsafe sex more often than the rest of us. It seems to me that the only 'education' they get is that sex will certainly give them STD's.
If one is to be punished for currying a pack of rubbers (since it shows you are planning to have pre-marital sex) then one will propably not use rubber at all.
In any case i just hope these kids try what the are rejecting instead of pretending to one another how virtuous they are...and that they do not end up with a wife as frigid as a polar bear's behind.

[mercian billman]

Rasaforos, do you want to tell why it's wrong to follow traditional values? If you read the link I posted you would see that more kids are drifting away from promiscuity and have become more traditional than their parents. Here's a little excerpt from the article,

The changes in politics are rooted in changes in values. Last year, the rate of teen pregnancy dropped to a record low. Better birth control is not the sole explanation; the proportion of teens who had intercourse fell from 56 percent in 1991 to 46 percent in 2001.


Maybe that's not the case in the UK but, more American kids are embracing the traditional values that our parents rejected.

[BDC]

Great. So they are burning crosses again and lynching people?

https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/tongue.gif

Bit low that sorry.

Cuturally Britain is very different from the US in this regard. You are becoming more religious and whatnot again, whilst we really aren't. It's just accepted as normal here.

You'd have to be stupid to get pregnant though. Free condoms, free morning after pill, free advice, free everything... https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-dizzy2.gif

[mercian billman]

Were accepting traditional values but, were not burning crosses or forcing women to stay in their homes. Im not sure about people becoming more religous though as I've stated before I'm a deist.

[shakaka36]

isnt religious studies the fastest growing CIE subject in the UK?

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Quote[/b] (shakaka36 @ July 18 2004,04:23)]isnt religious studies the fastest growing CIE subject in the UK?
What's CIE?

[Navaros]

you sex-obsessed guys make me sick, and i'll tell you why

some of you guys are only with women who you find to be attractive. which IMO, makes you very superficial and shallow. yes, it is your perogative to be superficial and shallow if you want to. that doesn't make it ok or wise, however.

btw, don't give me crap like i don't only go for looks. whether you only go for looks or not, is not the point. sure we'd all like to marry a genius Ph.D who is goodlooking too. but if looks is one of your main requirements for who you'd be with, then that alone is very tragic IMO

you see, no matter how goodlooking you are now, eventually you will be ugly, and so will your woman

so what then - you're gonna dump your woman after all those years just because she no longer looks good? or you're just waiting for the day when she will dump you, because you no longer look good?

any humans who base their relationships largely upon physical appearances, are tragic beings

[NagatsukaShumi]

I myself am still a virgin but I have had girlfriends in the past, the tragic part is, every one of them cheated on me, which has clearly made me come to the descision that cheating is the lowest thing a partner could possibly ever do to somebody, having experienced what its like I would NEVER do it to another person as I will always remember how awful it made me feel and I couldn't bare to hurt another person that way.

Love doesn't really matter when it comes to cheating, its the betrayal of your trust that hurts you the most, whether you were just having fun or not, if your going out then stick to eachother, if your just together for a bit of fun, don't become boyfriend and girlfriend, just fool around and hang out together then if you go with someone else, it won't hurt the other person as you weren't even serious.

Going out together should show commitment, to those saying if you break up with a girl your going to brak their heart anyway, speaking from the experience of been cheated on I would have rather been dumped then have to learn that my grilfriend had been sleeping with another guy because they were bored with me, it'd hurt less if they dumped me first, believe me

That aside, revenge was always fun and brutal, so remember, cheat and they'll get you back somehow https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif.

[BDC]

Quote[/b] (shakaka36 @ July 18 2004,04:23)]isnt religious studies the fastest growing CIE subject in the UK?
Not exactly sure what CIE is, but RS is popular because it is a doss. Basically.

And the lowest circle of hell is reserved for mutineers and traitors, remember that. Cheaters could be included there often...

But meh. Has to be looked at on a case-by-case basis in my view. Most of the time thought cheating is really low.

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Quote[/b] (BDC @ July 18 2004,23:30)]
Quote[/b] (shakaka36 @ July 18 2004,04:23)]isnt religious studies the fastest growing CIE subject in the UK?
Not exactly sure what CIE is, but RS is popular because it is a doss. Basically.

And the lowest circle of hell is reserved for mutineers and traitors, remember that. Cheaters could be included there often...

But meh. Has to be looked at on a case-by-case basis in my view. Most of the time thought cheating is really low.
Exactly. Anyone could pass RE at GCSE. The only reason most people take it in the UK is because they don't like History and Geography and have to a humanity.

Navaros-biogically, we are attracted to good looking people. It indicates health. I don't see any reason to deny this impulse.

[shakaka36]

yeah GCSE is what i meant, i took it in NZ where it was called CIE cause it was the Cambridge International exams

[shakaka36]

you see, no matter how goodlooking you are now, eventually you will be ugly, and so will your woman


unless you're Dick Clark, that guy hasnt aged in 20 years, and no plastic surgery to boot.

[Papewaio]

Quote[/b] (Navaros @ July 19 2004,00:27)]you sex-obsessed guys make me sick, and i'll tell you why

some of you guys are only with women who you find to be attractive. which IMO, makes you very superficial and shallow. yes, it is your perogative to be superficial and shallow if you want to. that doesn't make it ok or wise, however.

btw, don't give me crap like i don't only go for looks. whether you only go for looks or not, is not the point. sure we'd all like to marry a genius Ph.D who is goodlooking too. but if looks is one of your main requirements for who you'd be with, then that alone is very tragic IMO

you see, no matter how goodlooking you are now, eventually you will be ugly, and so will your woman

so what then - you're gonna dump your woman after all those years just because she no longer looks good? or you're just waiting for the day when she will dump you, because you no longer look good?

any humans who base their relationships largely upon physical appearances, are tragic beings
Why not go for the complete package?

Looks are part of it... otherwise everyone would be bisexual... also looks are a good indication of how healthy someone is... comes down to creating the next generation... what we see as good looking are all survival traits... breasts for babies... high checkbones are associated with better disease resistance... etc.

As for myself I have a good looking wife who has a university degree, she is someone I can trust. Trust is a very important part of a relationship, for me trust and integrity are the foundations of Love while being sexually attactive and compatible are part of having a great relationship. Other things like sense of humour, foods, movies etc are all semi-important.

Now if I ever cheat on my wife she has promised to slice off my genitals and staple them to my forehead. No problem as I think cheating is wrong, particularly in marriage.

[Ja'chyra]

How moralistic Nav, why don't you try living in the real world though.

If you meet a girl in a bar the first thing you notice is how she looks, unless of course she's wearing her university robes but that's not very likely.

Still, maybe we should go to the pub together, as everyone knows good looking girls always have an ugly friend, so you could have the ugly one and leave me to my shallow life with the fox. https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif

[English assassin]

If you ask me its not cheating that's wrong...its getting caught.
https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-jester.gif

[KukriKhan]

::dropping mod garb to spout personal opinion::

It's all about being a M A N

Which is to say: keeping your promises, doing what you say you'll do.

If you promise I'll be your boyfriend, and pay attention to no other females., then that's what you do. Period.

If you change your mind later, for whatever reason, you're obliged to go back to that person, and be released from that promise. If you don't do that, you're not an honorable man.

All that said, IMO 16 is too young to make that kind of promise, for most guys. Hormones will make it almost impossible to comply. So the promise shouldn't be made in the first place.

::resumes mod mode::

[Hetman_Koronny]

Quote[/b] (Navaros @ July 18 2004,09:27)]you see, no matter how goodlooking you are now, eventually you will be ugly, and so will your woman
wooot? you gotta be kiddin me man...

j/k

Actually, I very much agree with you. But few people realize that; I wouldn't bother trying to make them aware of that...

I re-visited this thread after a while and was not really surpriced that the opinion that cheating is wrong has been supported by only few people. I thought I wouldn't repeat my point of view and there's this subtopic that evolved that I like to comment on...

Sex before marriage?

I kinda agree with rasoforos who claims that there isn't a good relationship (long-term) if sex is not involved - incompatible good partners cannot be... But there's a threat if you thing about it. Even the best sex can eventually get a little boring. I know you're gonna flame me with 'Uhm, if I had one of Soly's girls, there's no way...'. Well, I guess there is a way.

Let me briefly digress. Burning love and fascination to the other person we feel during the first stage of relationship vanish rather quickly. And there is nothing wrong with it because you build your relationship upon other, longer lasting values like trust and respect. Feel free to comment but I really believe in it.

So, methinks, there is a danger that when a couple explores all that is to explore in advance they may be facing a danger of a relationship/marriage that is not solid. One day you may be find yourself looking at your girl and thinking: why the hell I am wasting my time with that woman? I've had it all. She can't give me more. This is when problems start...

I have been in a relationship for almost 7 years now and she should soon be my wife. We started out early and from a time perspective I am happy to say that there are no side effects (as described above). We are a happy couple who took the risk. And, while I agree that sex before marriage is a 'must-be' for many people, I also think that, like everything, it should be controled and should only make for an awesome element of a relationship (not its foundation).

[rasoforos]

Quote[/b] (Navaros @ July 18 2004,09:27)]

Quote[/b] ]

you sex-obsessed guys make me sick, and i'll tell you why




Since when is having a sexual life the same as being sex-obsessed? Please return to the real world...




Quote[/b] ]

some of you guys are only with women who you find to be attractive. which IMO, makes you very superficial and shallow. yes, it is your perogative to be superficial and shallow if you want to. that doesn't make it ok or wise, however.



Yes, looks count. Dont tell me you ll marry the female version of Freddy Cruger just because you 'communicate'? .Its all a matter of balance , its intelligence , its looks , its sex, its communication. And ou know what? you must be so convinced that we (the people of the outside world) go only for looks and that pretty girls cannot possibly be smart than i dont think i can convince you...



Quote[/b] ]
you see, no matter how goodlooking you are now, eventually you will be ugly, and so will your woman


Again totally irrelevant with anything we said. To extend your 'logic' sooner or later we ll also be dead so why marry? why use the net? why have this discussion? lets all sit down quietly and wait for our time to come...
Your argument is like ' if you buy milk now it will be sour in 10 days , so why buy fresh? '




Quote[/b] ]
any humans who base their relationships largely upon physical appearances, are tragic beings


To add up on all that you dont even know what 'tragic' means...



Seriously now mate, after posts like this and posts like (whoopi goldberg is evil) i seriously think you should seek some professional help. You ve got a really distorted image of the real world. Everyone who has a sex life is NOT sexually obsessed , people dont just go for looks , everyone who dissagrees with you is not necessarily evil...


P.S : At least, please tell me you dont believe women to be inferior or subordinate or something like that...and that you are not 30 years old or more....

[A.Saturnus]

Quote[/b] ]
Seriously now mate, after posts like this and posts like (whoopi goldberg is evil) i seriously think you should seek some professional help. You ve got a really distorted image of the real world.

Please, advices like that aren´t helpful.

[Kaiser of Arabia]

Trust Saturnus on that one, I agree with him cause I have some experience.
-Capo

[BDC]

Of course people care about looks. It's INSTINCT. A curvey woman is better fed, healthier and more fertile than one who isn't.

[rasoforos]

Quote[/b] (A.Saturnus @ July 19 2004,17:51)]
Quote[/b] ]
Seriously now mate, after posts like this and posts like (whoopi goldberg is evil) i seriously think you should seek some professional help. You ve got a really distorted image of the real world.

Please, advices like that aren´t helpful.
No actually i think it would be very helpful.Its an advice and not meant to be an accusation or a demeaning comment ( and something that most of us 'sexually obsessed' people would recomment )

[A.Saturnus]

Quote[/b] (rasoforos @ July 20 2004,11:30)]
Quote[/b] (A.Saturnus @ July 19 2004,17:51)]
Quote[/b] ]
Seriously now mate, after posts like this and posts like (whoopi goldberg is evil) i seriously think you should seek some professional help. You ve got a really distorted image of the real world.

Please, advices like that aren´t helpful.
No actually i think it would be very helpful.Its an advice and not meant to be an accusation or a demeaning comment ( and something that most of us 'sexually obsessed' people would recomment )
Well, it would help a lot of people to visit a shrink. But an advice like that isn´t usefull in a discussion because instead of actually encouraging anyone to seek counseling, it will only produce hard feelings.
Apart from that, it´s not a psychotherapist´s job to rectify views you deem wrong.

[The_Emperor]

I don't do cheating, it only complicates matters... Also as we all know those secret vices don't stay secret forever

[mercian billman]

I wonder if Navaros has seen the women of solypist thread?

[Goofball]

Quote[/b] ]Well Brian (name changed to protect the innocent) it really doesn't matter if you cheated on your girlfriend. By having pre-marital sex you've already cheated on god.

If it's advice you want I suggest you consider who's being cheated here. The only person being cheated is your girlfriend obviously you and the new chick are having fun from all this and 2 out of 3 ain't bad

God really doesn't care if you have sex with 1 person or 1 million if your not married he's pretty damn angry.


Technically, it's not pre-marital sex if you have no intention of marrying the girl...

https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/smokin.gif

[Papewaio]

Navaros is entitled to his point of view, in some ways the world would be a safer place if people followed through with that view.

Sex can be a combination of things. But one thing for sure is if you are not emotionally ready for it, you can cause a massive backlash to yourself if anything goes wrong.

----

From my experience as a newly wed. Wasabi and I in the middle of the year told her parents that we where going to get married in the middle of semester... this was the final semester for her. They jumped to conclusions and assumed she was pregnent and a few other why why why?

Now 10 months of marriage later I am getting the opposite questions... why not why not why not... when when when are you having children.

I feel that the difference in support is wonderful. Also for some people they require the social support structure to raise a family, deal with life issues, for day to day support etc. For people in close knit families that support each other pre-marital sex can be a huge problem as it breaks a few rules and hence levels of trust.

This I have observed again and again here in Taiwan where there is minimal social welfare and it is the extended family that looks after individuals in time of need.

Of course in Taiwan the wedding is typically in the same week as the engagement so draw your own conclusions https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/gc-jester.gif

[mercian billman]

Quote[/b] (Goofball @ July 22 2004,17:53)]
Quote[/b] ]Well Brian (name changed to protect the innocent) it really doesn't matter if you cheated on your girlfriend. By having pre-marital sex you've already cheated on god.

If it's advice you want I suggest you consider who's being cheated here. The only person being cheated is your girlfriend obviously you and the new chick are having fun from all this and 2 out of 3 ain't bad

God really doesn't care if you have sex with 1 person or 1 million if your not married he's pretty damn angry.


Technically, it's not pre-marital sex if you have no intention of marrying the girl...

https://forums.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/smokin.gif
Then I guess it's non-marital sex.