Seducing a Professor

[Kanamori]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?

[Csargo]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?

:rolleyes:

[Kanamori]

Vote Sasaki!

[discovery1]

I would suggest walking up to them just before lecture wearing just a bathrob and then loosing it.

[Csargo]

Vote Sasaki!

AHHHH HE KNOWS WHERE I LIVE!!!!! HE'S TRYING TO GET ME!!!:help:

[Beren Son Of Barahi]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?


I would go with smart,funny, very cute and most of all, very dirty... should do the trick.
~:pimp: :iloveyou: :gorgeous: :cheerleader:

[Ice]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?

See, this is why you should study... :yes:

[John86]

I would suggest walking up to them just before lecture wearing just a bathrob and then loosing it.

A Fu Manchu would help as well.

[Adrian II]

Beren has a point. If we are talking female professors, then smart, funny and dirty* should do the job. As for male professors I wouldn't know. Do they even have sex?

* I don't mean talk dirty, just suggest a dirty mind. Cf. Hofstadter's Addendum to Adrian II, The Collected Early Papers, IV, p 465 and beyond

[John86]

Is this for leisure or for "Im failing so I may as well try" purposes?

[Devastatin Dave]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?
Care to elaborate? Are you need of a professional seducer? Are you looking for self gratifying stories to "use"? Or is there going to be a punchline somewhere?:help:

[Beren Son Of Barahi]

Beren has a point. If we are talking female professors, then smart, funny and dirty* should do the job. As for male professors I wouldn't know. Do they even have sex?

* I don't mean talk dirty, just suggest a dirty mind. Cf. Hofstadter's Addendum to Adrian II, The Collected Early Papers, IV, p 465 and beyond


i was talking about either really, if it is a female your after, then forget the cute part and go for smart, funny and dirty...

it more help with some back story, otherwise i suggest we make it up our selves...might be better if you give it to us tho...:juggle2:

[Yun Dog]

1. have two legs and a pulse (not all necessary prerequisites)
2. pretend your REALLY interested in their mundane, derived and superceded theories
3. be the only student to actually show up to their lecture (sober)
4. tell them you'll do ANYTHING to improve your grades
5. stay back after the lab is over to help tidy up
6. pretend you find them amusing (ie. laugh at their incredibly dull jokes)
7. goto the same incredibly lame postgraduate lecture series and conferences that they goto
8. speak to them without a glazed over look in your eyes
9. Invite them to goto to some increadibly boring lecture and coffee afterwoods (yep a date - cause they will be very wary of anything on campus)
10. seek professional medical advice because you are one sick puppy

[edit] can you draw disability for disl;ex8a

[doc_bean]

A tough and interesting question, and I think it really depends on the professor. Ultimately, I'd advice you have something interesting to talk about besides their specialisation, while still being up to date on that, in case (s)he wants to talk about that. Try to appear smart but don't try to upstage them (though that might worlk for some, most of the ones I know have gigantic egos).

Good luck !



As for male professors I wouldn't know. Do they even have sex?


Usually with their assistents from what I gather.

[Kanamori]

Care to elaborate? Are you need of a professional seducer? Are you looking for self gratifying stories to "use"? Or is there going to be a punchline somewhere?:help:

The first first, and well, I assumed the third was going to happen, not by me, and the second... well if you're a good erotica writer, I might use material.



Beren has a point. If we are talking female professors, then smart, funny and dirty* should do the job. As for male professors I wouldn't know. Do they even have sex?

Female professor. Hints of a dirty mind should come once she suspects me... Sly grins too, any patented tricks you would share?


Is this for leisure or for "Im failing so I may as well try" purposes?

Not for failing... she'd be too serious to like me if I were failing, though I've found being scolded can be exciting.~;)


Ultimately, I'd advice you have something interesting to talk about besides their specialisation, while still being up to date on that, in case (s)he wants to talk about that. Try to appear smart but don't try to upstage them (though that might worlk for some, most of the ones I know have gigantic egos).

Philosophers...

Are there any professors here? What types of things would make you wary of students, or would you consider abnormal enough to cue you in that something's up?

I think I've already sparked intellectual interest with a couple perspectives that seemed new to her [joke goes here], and gave her the "huh..." look. She doesn't treat me like an idiot, at least. I'm looking for tons of ideas. Thanks for the ones so far. This needs to happen.

[Andres]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?

Does being seduced by a hot female teacher in high school count as well?

And I was still a minor! The trauma's! The trauma's! :eyebrows:

We never got any further than one kiss... I was shy :shame:

[Beirut]

Does a chick in her final year for her Ph.D. count?

[Major Robert Dump]

Wait until class is over. Be the last one to leave, and pretend to trip and hurt yourself. Then say romatically "Thou shall enable me to arise unscathed if you take a seat upon my face" and she probably will because class is over and she's tired and wants to sit down. This is an old trick I"m suprised you didn't know it already

[doc_bean]

Oh just remember a story of a guy who went a little too far with a professor, moral of the story: get her drunk !

[Seamus Fermanagh]

Does a chick in her final year for her Ph.D. count?

No. ABD's are a dime a dozen (at least that's how academe treats them).

[Caius]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?
A teacher treated me like a son.

but try to be the very active.Teachers love that the fact someone like her class.You understand, right?

[Yoyoma1910]

You know, perhaps if you were a minor in high school or junior high you might have a chance with a nice American school teacher, as there seems to be a bit of that going on lately.:coffeenews:





My advice is:

To find yourselves together in a nice romantic spot in the back of the Library somewhere.

Or maybe try the cheesy apple trick.

Or somehow go back in time and develop a nice French accent.

And whatever you do, remember that stalking is not an option.:no:

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

Start getting fit, women love nothing more than an intelligent athlete, if you can add sensetive to the list you're in.

Find out if there's something you can do for her academically, then do it well but make mistakes.

More importantly, why are you interested in a proffessor? Aren't there any cute Fresh where you are?????????????????

[Adrian II]

More importantly, why are you interested in a proffessor? Aren't there any cute Fresh where you are?????????????????Cute fresh is boring. Kanamori is a man of taste and he likes a challenge.
Female professor. Hints of a dirty mind should come once she suspects me... Sly grins too, any patented tricks you would share? Never in (or after) class. Find out about her extra-curricular activities (sports, music, whatever) and meet her there.
Women are fascinated by passionate men. If you don't have a passion, pretend you do. Find out what her passion is and ignore it with extreme prejudice. Draw her into your universe.
Make her laugh incontrollably. After you have done so, and only then, you may venture into dirty talk - not dirty words, dirty innuendo only, and only for brief moments.
After this, ignore her for a week or more as if you have more pressing business. Then pick up where you left.
Transfer $500 to my bank account for part 2 of my course. ~;)

[Yoyoma1910]

Oh, And don't forget your speedos. Older women adore those. It makes them soil their depends.

[Beren Son Of Barahi]

Firstly, you need to be able to get her in to an environment outside of her work. i am not sure how easy that will be, it requires some up front work. Also, playing the game is fine, but there is a very limited window between "oh someone likes me, thats so exciting" and "i wish this weirdo would leave me alone"... i like the apple thing, its very corny, i would write a note in the apple.... like xyz bar @ 8:00....oh course it might re enforce the teach/student thing, which are are sort of trying to advoid in order for her to take you serious.


so the tips so far for you are:

Smart, interested but also more then just a one topic guy...

funny, a little corny might be okay, but cheeky and a little naughty too.

A little dirty and a little nice and a little bastard too, women love someone who isn't a push over...

get her outside of work as quick as you can.

if you get anywhere, push it, then hold off once you know you getting somewhere.

If it doesnt work, don't get weird or chase her forever...

don't wear white socks. <------ most important of all.
:balloon2:

[Kanamori]

Oh just remember a story of a guy who went a little too far with a professor, moral of the story: get her drunk !

I'm still underage.:beam:


but try to be the very active.Teachers love that the fact someone like her class.You understand, right?

Yes, but I think that I make more impact on teachers when I'm generally quiet and say something clever when I have it.



More importantly, why are you interested in a proffessor? Aren't there any cute Fresh where you are?????????????????

She's more interesting.



Never in (or after) class. Find out about her extra-curricular activities (sports, music, whatever) and meet her there.
Women are fascinated by passionate men. If you don't have a passion, pretend you do. Find out what her passion is and ignore it with extreme prejudice. Draw her into your universe.
Make her laugh incontrollably. After you have done so, and only then, you may venture into dirty talk - not dirty words, dirty innuendo only, and only for brief moments.
After this, ignore her for a week or more as if you have more pressing business. Then pick up where you left.
Transfer $500 to my bank account for part 2 of my course.~;)



Finesse!:bounce:


Thanks all.~:cheers:

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Double post. I could have sworn I could delete posts, but I couldn't seem to find the option...

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

This is probably insulting your intelligence a little, but still: have you considered the fact that if this goes wrong, it could make the rest of your course very difficult indeed?

Something to consider.

[Beirut]

Something to consider.

Something to consider is we've all seen your picture and I'll bet the lady profs are on you like butter on toast. ~:smoking:

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Well, I didn't want to bring it up ... but let's just say I didn't get expelled from three different schools for no reason....

[Gregoshi]

When the moon's in the sky
Like a big pizza pie - that's (Kan)amori!

[Yun Dog]

Shes going to risk her professional career?, years of struggling to get
research grants, putting up with a male dominated hierachy, exposing herself to the ridicule of her peers, who probably cant wait to complain to vice chancellor (universitys have a lot of backstabbing), the chance of ever getting a position in a university again - to have an afair with an undergrad?

MWAA HA HA HA HA HA

:laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

and I bet your the only guy in her classes that has a crush on her - NOT :oops:

think again dude

and find someone who doesnt have to throw their life away to go out with you


boinking the students is frowned apon, and exposed ones-self to exploitation law suites, blackmail, and unprofessional conduct hearings

[Seamus Fermanagh]

Cute fresh is boring. Kanamori is a man of taste and he likes a challenge. Never in (or after) class. Find out about her extra-curricular activities (sports, music, whatever) and meet her there.
Women are fascinated by passionate men. If you don't have a passion, pretend you do. Find out what her passion is and ignore it with extreme prejudice. Draw her into your universe.
Make her laugh incontrollably. After you have done so, and only then, you may venture into dirty talk - not dirty words, dirty innuendo only, and only for brief moments.
After this, ignore her for a week or more as if you have more pressing business. Then pick up where you left.
Transfer $500 to my bank account for part 2 of my course. ~;)

Well done sir. Does the "and don't worry about it or fixate on it" lesson come in part two?

I agree with your implication that women are far more attractive than girls.

[Caius]

This is probably insulting your intelligence a little, but still: have you considered the fact that if this goes wrong, it could make the rest of your course very difficult indeed?

Something to consider.
Thats not a problem BKS

Always there is an option of other school :beam: :bounce:

[English assassin]

Does a chick in her final year for her Ph.D. count?

This is a piece of cake. So long as you obey the golden rule (never ask if she has got any results/how the write up is going) you basically can't fail.

[Andres]

This is a piece of cake. So long as you obey the golden rule (never ask if she has got any results/how the write up is going) you basically can't fail.

Ah, that's why it never worked out... :embarassed:

[Adrian II]

Finesse!:bounce:Since you appreciate the finer points, I will give you the second part for free:

Don't fall in love with her! :dizzy2: ~;)

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

I think we all know how Adrian got his degree.:no:

:yes: :beam:

Seriously though, none of my tutors are that attractive, and given the fact that such a relationship is going nowhere I have always preffered young, cute, fun and smart with a posibility of a future.

However, if you are determined good luck to you and don't get caught/tell anyone.

[Caius]

Does anyone have experience seducing professors?
May I ask why?

[Adrian II]

I think we all know how Adrian got his degree.:no:I worked hard for it! ~:pimp:

[Caius]

I worked hard for it! ~:pimp:
Yes, I guess faking the reports was hard.:beam:

[Adrian II]

Yes, I guess faking the reports was hard.:beam:I gave most of them good reports. Gotta give credit where it's due. :smartass2: