Re: Historical army sizes
Civil wars more often see either a quick resolution by betrayal or large armies gathered and a decisive battle or two. Punic wars and other wars of large states usually saw numerous battles and skirmishes. There might be still a decisive battle but before that can happen usually one side has to secure a dominant position to bring that decisive battle and so its hard to say. The size of battles in MTW2 even maxed unit sizes are probably between a skirmish and a large decisive battle. However many times the states fighting were relatively small and did not have the huge amount of men to call up that large states did so a battle of 4,000 on each side would have been decisive with perhaps a few further skirmishes to enforce the victory. There are so many exceptions though...
The most famous and recorded battles are usually larger but a campaign is called that for a reason. Usually to force an enemy into a decisive battle there were already many smaller engagements fought so... not sure if you can force MTW2 AI to invade in a coordinated manner without simply making it have huge bonus that despite it wasting 50% of its forces in weird marches the wrong direction it still is able to send a large amount on the offensive in the same direction.
Re: Historical army sizes
It depends on the people and what you are doing. Certain people could raise absolutely ridiculous armies from the lower classes for defensive battles.