God's Nipples! (Cool pre-battle speeches)

Rilder: That screen shot alone is enough to convince me I need to turn on the text in my game.

I've enoyed the speeches so far too.

I played through a Spanish campaign and never had a general with 'poor speaker' so, mostly heard good stirring speeches. A lot of repetition but, good stuff anyway.

After winning that campaign to unlock the other factions, I started playing as the Scots and, I'm experiencing a bit of culture shock though. Most of the Spanish speechs had a bit of preamble, a midpoint and final statement.

So far every Scots speech has pretty much been: 'Alright lads, lets KILL EM ALL!!!!' >cheer<

Done.

I reckon they're men of few words, those Scots.

The Russians and Poles were also ignored for cool speaches and I'm willing to bet there's others.

A shame really.

Peace, One Love,
Snite

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So far every Scots speech has pretty much been: 'Alright lads, lets KILL EM ALL!!!!' >cheer<

Done.

I reckon they're men of few words, those Scots.

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In my campaign my scots general said:

"Our foes? OUR FOES?!?! I've had oatcakes tougher than them!"

Quite amusing.

German generals are the funniest to click on.

"Zat won't hurt me, dumkoff!"

'You are not a warrior, you are only a schwine-farmer!"

Playing as the English, several times when launching an attack against castles/fortresses with archers in the enemy stack I've gotten:

"I see they refuse to fight us like men, but must resort to a women's strategem of throwing things at us!".

:laugh4:

The French have one that shows up when you use a no command stars generals about them going on about how wonderfully cultured they are. Bragging about how well they can dance and play the lute and other such war like things.

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Originally Posted by Snite

The Russians and Poles were also ignored for cool speaches and I'm willing to bet there's others.

A shame really.

Peace, One Love,
Snite

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Now playing as Egypt, and they are also lacking in the speech category.

I am now of the opinion that only the factions that start off unlocked have the really fun/interesting speeches.

ah well.

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Originally Posted by Kraggenmor

Now playing as Egypt, and they are also lacking in the speech category.

I am now of the opinion that only the factions that start off unlocked have the really fun/interesting speeches.

ah well.

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Probably true, but I did laugh my ass off when I heard an Egyptian general cry out about the "Ummah!" in the end. Just the way he says it is enough to make me laugh.

its such a shame i didn't find this out earlier, as i only came across it by accident, the manual really needs to mention it because to many people would rush to get in to the battle.

I guess i need to play as the french or english cause the HRE (so far) only give morale boosting speeches about glory for the empire and that kind of stuff.

But im wondering if anyone has seen different kind of speeches from kings and that kind of stuff?

these are really good but how come i dont get these pre battle speeches. the only one i get is when i fought the aztecs for the first time

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Originally Posted by SGT_Ben

So far my favorite one is my Byzantine general referring to the Milanese as "...goat fondling arse monkies".

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I heard that too

that was so funny, and especially with that latin accent
:laugh4:

I dont understand why turks use arabic words and scentences some times

may be im wrong but i hear turks some times saying sibni la wahdi, that is arabic for leave me alone

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Originally Posted by Paul_of_Byzantine

sibni la wahdi, that is arabic for leave me alone

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So THATS what that is. Thank you!

I couldn't make out what was being said at all. I had settled on 'simply not wanted'. Which I figured was wrong but it's all I could come up with.

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Originally Posted by Kraggenmor

So THATS what that is. Thank you!

I couldn't make out what was being said at all. I had settled on 'simply not wanted'. Which I figured was wrong but it's all I could come up with.

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I think CA has to do some more research on turkish language!

I've had a very funny one
"Oh bugger it all! Pray to god and let us win!

i had one while defending against the mongols as venice
"even the lowliest peasents in our army must feel pity for these wretches, and pity for their horses who must carry such boney arses"
that cracked me up:laugh4:

I liked this one in the category 'Just another bar brawl': "And to the enemy general I say this : ARE YOU LOOKING AT MY BIRD? ARE YOU, EH? COME OVER HERE AND SAY THAT, YOU NANCY! AAARGHH!"

Or this one, don't know if it is a normal English expression: "Well slap my thighs and call me for dinner! I see a foe worth killing! I also feel an inspirational speech coming on, so listen to me: (blah blah).."

BTW: hello all :2thumbsup: !

I just found this one it came from one of my generals that just lost some crazy trait or something along those lines but he ends up saying something like "And I now see the remarks I made in the past about all of us being moved around like chess characters to battle for the amusement of children are past me now" or something along those lines.

This came form one of my HRE generals, not sure if anyone else has heard it or i myslef just picked up one of those crazy traits :dizzy2: :wall:

Sounds like a comment on the new engine :grin2:

I particularly liked the German's phrase:
"We are the Sword in the Hands of the Hordes of Heaven!"

It has everything: internal rhyme (Sword - Hordes), alliteration (Hands - Hordes - Heaven) and metrum. Sheer beauty.

when playing as the french, the general was saying about the english..

"they have no decent food, no beautiful women, and the devil himself would be ashamed to have them in hell!" ,
it was just funny tho in the french accent and all.. plus it was more too but i forget the rest

I always half expected the french taunts to be something like this.

"How you English say, 'I one more time, mac, unclog my nose in
your direction', sons of a window-dresser! So, you think you could out-
clever us French folk with your silly knees-bent running about advancing
behavior?! I wave my private parts at your aunties, you cheesy lot of
second hand electric donkey-bottom biters.I burst my pimples at you and call your door-opening request a silly thing, you tiny-brained wipers
of other people's bottoms! And now, remain gone, illegitimate-faced bugger-folk! And, if you think you got a nasty taunting this time, you ain't heard nothing yet, dappy English k-nnniggets! Thpppt!"

Yeah, haven't played with the french, but they definitely needed some "mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries!" quotes...

"Do not come back, or I shall taunt you a second time..ah..."

these should happen when you are the french and your castle/fortress/citadel is being sieged by the english.









I wish they did :P

For anyone who's interested there is a 'Xenophobia' mod in the following downloads category:

http://www.twcenter.net/forums/downl...at&id=7&page=3

It uses localised voiceovers from French, German (etc) versions of the game to give you the native language of certain factions in game.

I love it when the HRE general says "It it time to crush the schwein" (time to crush the pig...how nice of him :laugh4: )

I had an interesting speech from my Venetian heir before a battle. The man was clearly frustrated and use the term “Ass weasels” several times, then something about drinking from chamber pots. Finally at the end he said something…”Ass [pause]…” I swear, I thought he was going to use the F word, “Those ass *****” (turned out to be monkeys). I wish he would of, I would have giggle like a little school girl. I don’t remember what his virtues were, but he was clearly frustrated and didn’t like Sicilians :no: .

Has the English Voice Actor been changed for 1.2?

I only asked because I've never noticed before how down right nasty he sounds. In fact, the last English nobleman that landed in Northern Spain was so down right rude and snearing in his responses to my diplomats that it almost became a personal grudge to kill him. There seem to be two voice actors, one upper class type and this bloke who sounds like an egotistical thug.

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Originally Posted by Kraggenmor

I am now of the opinion that only the factions that start off unlocked have the really fun/interesting speeches.

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Only the default factions, Portugal and the Italian factions have long speeches. The others have short speeches. I am actually unsure for Denmark, but I assume they do not have long speeches.

Tschüß!
Erich

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Originally Posted by Fußball

Only the default factions, Portugal and the Italian factions have long speeches. The others have short speeches. I am actually unsure for Denmark, but I assume they do not have long speeches.

Tschüß!
Erich

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That's not fair ... Hungary is such fun to play but the sermon-like speeches are so dull... If I wanted to go to Mass, I'll go to church and not in front of my PC...