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I always get approached out in public by every woman and her dog, and it's starting to get on my nerves. I've tried everything. Making myself sweaty and stinky, but that just ends up backfiring: "Oooo, you have a great musky smell!"/"Can I bottle you?"/etc. Acting insane, backfires more: "Isn't he quirky!". Etcetera.
Please help. It's getting me down. I don't think I can take it any more.
Is she cute?
Braggart.
That's exactly what happens to me when I go out walking alone with my son. Did you know all women are cross-eyed? They must be, since they all seem to be looking down while telling me how cute and beautiful I am. Or maybe they're so impressed with me that they don't dare to look straight at me?
What's worst, is how they wink and ask if I sleep at night! I try so hard not to look like a beastly machine that can go on for an entire night, but it doesn't seem to work.
Please, help me.
I had the same problem, I simply struck up the usual conversation and got the "so what do you do?" stage...
I then explained in great detail that I was a professional moderator on a computer war gaming forum and that in addition, during those quiet evenings I like modify the game graphics to my personal liking... trust me works every time. It's important to maintain a deadly serious expression throughout however - that takes some doing.
Then you'll find the one who loves your mod and pick up another stalker.Quote:
Originally Posted by caravel
give em some of these, totally historical soldiers of ancient Greece! they worship Pinkie Pie!
http://www.twcenter.net/forums/attac...1&d=1320753630
Brownps?
Browny Panchalkoi :grin: (now, don't give me lecture on correct ancient greek language, I know they worship pinkie pie!)Quote:
Originally Posted by Montmorency
I can relate to that, so many women look at me but don't dare to say a thing because I'm obviously way above their reach...
For some reason, young women frequently fling their waste into my face, even as I protest that I'm not into that sort of thing. Though they seem to respond well to the groping that precedes this.
I'd say you're trying to milk a camel, but have gotten the stallions mixed up with the fillies...
My reflection won't stop complimenting me at every chance it gets. Should I be concerned?
Friend of mine has same problem, it drives him nuts he hates the attention. Rediculously handsome guy he can have any woman he wants.
FixedQuote:
Originally Posted by ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88
For some reason they give me their bra's everytime I'm drunk...
Well whatever you do, don't join a band.
heh Moros has men-boobsQuote:
Originally Posted by Moros
edit: fun flllow-up fact of that mate of mine. He swears he only slept with one woman, his gf.
We. simply. can't. believe. it.
We do though. But geez, this guy makes heterosexual men blush
try ignoring them.
I do that when I'm hit on in an unwelcome manner. seems to work.
Just be practical about it, Psychonaut. Use this new and unexhaustable resource.
From experience I can say that girls make great blankets, decent chairs but poor refridgerators.
I am calling BS on this unless you can prove it via pictures.
Great. Now I've got men chasing after me as well.Quote:
Originally Posted by hero di classico
We are just hungry for the leftoversQuote:
Originally Posted by Psychonaut
Psycho, have you considered therapy? Otherwise this might scar you for life.
I have the same problem but the women who come up to me tend to be alcoholics with VD
I need a new pub
Hey STrike, thought you and Louis finally flew to the moonQuote:
Originally Posted by Strike For The South
Where's the Frenchman :(
He's been martyred by the elite. The plebs called for blood and we gave it to themQuote:
Originally Posted by Fragony
A black mark on this forum
Delicious, delicious blood.
what psychonaut needs to do is carry around a large box of magnum condoms and whenever a girl talks to him they should "fall" out of his pocket. then he should exclaim, "oh no! my large box of magnum condums." the girls will get the hint.
oh wait, you wanted advice to get them to leave you alone.
Sydney does have a deficit of single hetro males to females.
You could just pretend to be on your way to Oxford street...
Be kind of unclean and nerdy. You know... don't shave, wear clothes way below your age.
If that's not possible, just be plain nerdy. You know, make up something incredibly boring for your job. (TW moderator is fine, historian or geologist are guaranteed sleeping pills as well - just read up on some vulcanic minerals and imagine all the fun you can have "pondering the problems with your new research project"...)
As a rule this will not only make most of the female population leave you alone but most of the population in general. Which is intended, I assume. Gives you more time to play TW games.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?featur...nVOuOOOE#t=23s
A one, and a two, and a three...
I'm not chasing you, I just want physical evidence that you can back up your boasting. If you have no proof, then you've got no game.Quote:
Originally Posted by Psychonaut
:inquisitive:Quote:
Originally Posted by hero di classico
:creep:
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Internet tough guy over here.Quote:
Originally Posted by hero di classico
His face is KNOWN to us and he's quite the looker :sweetheart:Quote:
Originally Posted by hero di classico
Well I am rather new here and I have not seen his face. :tongue:
Maybe that's for the better, he made me mildly bi-curious at least and I'm sure I am not aloneQuote:
Originally Posted by hero di classico
Get a pet tiger. When the dog approaches, the tiger will defend you in the pursuit of the nice bite sized snack and promptly chase the both of them off. They will never trouble you again.Quote:
Originally Posted by Psychonaut
See my spoiler above! ~;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Fragony
Already thought about how you are going to explain to your parents that you suddenly feel different? What has been seen cannot be unseen just sayin'
https://img32.imageshack.us/img32/74...een0518271.jpg
Personally I don't see what the fuss is about Psycho. Yeah I found pictures of him, but I don't see why we are making such a fuss about his looks.
I understand, I personally feel Husar is prettier as well. He has that whole German stable-boy thing going for him I agree, Psycho is a bit too metro
I am hotter than any of you.
Then we have a solution to Psychonaut's problem: move to Scotland. Become a Protestant. Possibly both.Quote:
Originally Posted by Rhyfhylwyr
Start wearing a wedding ring...
That's what I do when they starts encircling me like velociraptors. I just hold out my hand and point at the gold with a(n) apologetic smile.
If you're really desperate to avoid female contact, just follow the advice of Homer Simpson. "If that doesn't work, then six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn."
FINALLY! Thank you. :2thumbsup:Quote:
Originally Posted by Tellos Athenaios
But you will be ganged upon by ugly women, that are drunk. I kinda suspect you always secretly wanted to be a protestant Scotsman and were just desperate for an excuse
Back to the drawing board. =(Quote:
Originally Posted by Fragony
Guys don't be like that! ~:mecry:
Ok you got me good.
So this is my advice for the OP...
1. Live in a dump where 90% of people are chavs
2. Work for minimum wage in a business that young women don't use much
3. Go to a church where 99% are old people
4. Go to a hardcore gym that women never frequent
5. Spend the rest of your time sleeping and eating
6. ???
7. Profit!
meh, looks like I'm the only one who confortable with the fact that I'm almost daily eating my lunch break with girls together lol
I see this is more like seixsim. You guys should be happy! It's not like I get girls to talk me all the time! No girl talks to me. Well apart from my family, you are extremly lucky to have this, you're throwing it away for no damn reason. It's not annyoing! Is there a problem in talking with a girl? So what? Even if she appears a bit moody or wants to talk, then talk. I wouldn't mind at all. And Subton is the feminist protector isn't he? I haven't seen his reply.
But you're just throwing it away, sorry If I appear rude, but this is not something I would never throw away. This is a golden opportunity. I can't believe you guys are just....throwing it! You're not going to get much at this rate.
This is all in jest Marshall! A thread just to goof around a bit, very light hearted! :)
Though on a more serious note, my girl skills and attraction techniques could use some polish as well! :O
Feminist protector reporting in.
I'm just sitting back and quitely enjoying this thread. I'll comment when I see the need to.
[QUOTE=Rhyfhylwyr;2053397685]1. Live in a dump where 90% of people are chavs
2. Work for minimum wage in a business that young women don't use much
3. Go to a church where 99% are old people
4. Go to a hardcore gym that women never frequent
5. Spend the rest of your time sleeping and eating
6. Get drunk
7. Be the village idiot enpregnating smelly-Mary
8. Back to point one but with crying baby
Scotland was already mentioned, kinda overkill this. Fixed it for accuracy
Subotan is a woman???
No. Rosie the Riveter came to mind when I was described as a "feminist protector", as I've never heard of anyone described like that ever.
Ok, but I think you said that, oh well never mind.Quote:
Originally Posted by Subotan
Wait, you're a woman?Quote:
Originally Posted by JuJuBee
Everyone on the internet is a GIRL, aka Guy In Real Life.
And of course the children are the FBI.
No, I just noted my lack thereof. :)Quote:
Wait, you're a woman?
I can pretend to be a lady girl Juju. Noone will notice...Quote:
Originally Posted by JuJuBee
Well, I won't complain then. Perhaps other women will grow jealous! Sounds good!Quote:
I can pretend to be a lady girl Juju. Noone will notice...