Sons of Atlantis - A Roman political uncorrect AAR

[schlappi]

Thats just disgusting...







































... and i love it!

[Obelics]

next one will see our first encounter with Carthaginians, sort of first punic war, they sent an army in our controlled lands, heading straight for Syracuse, near roman fort presiding Trinacria...

[PersianFire]

"Obelics. Well done my friend and a great update. Lots of hard work and imagination into your AAR's. Excellent.

On a more personal note, I hope Hanno looks into his stride in Sardinia. I hope when you meet him, he CRUSHES your Romani forces. Nothing more pleasing that an African war elephant charging and tossing numerous legionaries 50ft into the air to their death."

[Obelics]

"Obelics. Well done my friend and a great update. Lots of hard work and imagination into your AAR's. Excellent.

On a more personal note, I hope Hanno looks into his stride in Sardinia. I hope when you meet him, he CRUSHES your Romani forces. Nothing more pleasing that an African war elephant charging and tossing numerous legionaries 50ft into the air to their death."

thanks PF, i will try to use my leves at their best
anyway i dont know, id like to have some hints, if i try to push back Cartago from Sicily, and i buid a flot of navy to sally out to sardinia and Corsica and try to conquer it, could this be enough for a sort of first punic war?
im building a flot of 2 war units and 1 trasport one for the case i want to invade the two isles.
Also is it good if i try to have a stronghold in Massalia too?

the fact is that im neutral with Aedui, so i cant expand in Gallia, and massalia should be rebel. My only declared enemy are cartaginians now.

im too lazy now for going to read again some manuals i read years ago, so im not much expert in punic wars.

So in definitive, im trying to achieve these objective for next table:
Sicily, Corsica, Sardinia and Massilia, what do you think people?

[Moosemanmoo]

Me love you long time!


hopefully that was helpful enough

[Obelics]

Me love you long time!


hopefully that was helpful enough

hope that was something good, im so bad to understand english word jokes

[General Appo]

Taking Sicily, Sardinia and Corsica should be enough for a First Punic War yes.
The Romans did take Sicily and a few years later forced the Carthaginians to give up Sardinia, so that would be okay I think. Massilia was firmly allied with the Romans, so taking it and perhaps keeping it at L4 Gov. would be quite historical.
Anyway, great work man, hilarious.

[PersianFire]

thanks PF, i will try to use my leves at their best
anyway i dont know, id like to have some hints, if i try to push back Cartago from Sicily, and i buid a flot of navy to sally out to sardinia and Corsica and try to conquer it, could this be enough for a sort of first punic war?
im building a flot of 2 war units and 1 trasport one for the case i want to invade the two isles.
Also is it good if i try to have a stronghold in Massalia too?

the fact is that im neutral with Aedui, so i cant expand in Gallia, and massalia should be rebel. My only declared enemy are cartaginians now.

im too lazy now for going to read again some manuals i read years ago, so im not much expert in punic wars.

So in definitive, im trying to achieve these objective for next table:
Sicily, Corsica, Sardinia and Massilia, what do you think people?

"If following a historical point of view Obelics, I would battle for control of Sardinia and have poss 2x fleets for any Cartahginian naval units that may be encountered north and south of Sicily. When Carthage sued for peace and due to the heavy war indemnities they had to pay i.e reparations that the romans demanded, Carthage agreed to pay their mercenaries (especially Sicilian veterans who served under Hamilcar) way too late which led to rebellion. This coupled with their ongoing war to subdue the Numidian princes left Carthage in trouble and Rome seized the opportunity to take Sardinia and Corsica. So, take and secure Sicily first. However, I pray most fervently to great Ba'al that he favours the Punic forces on Sicily to crush the romani scum."

[Obelics]

ok, thanks for the tips, im not sure im doing something that have just a far appearence of a punic war, im not an expert, and ive not the pazience and time to do that, so, lets say there will be just a flavour of it. Anyway thanks everyone and here's an update, sorry for the long time (im slow i know) and here we go (remember to press F11 on keyboard since i like vertical pics):






















TABULA V



Carthage is a respected power... yes, and feared too... infact, as we were almost concluding the negotiations with Pyrrhus, a Carthagianian fleet were stationing just near the coast, to make it clear, if it was not clear enough, that they wanted the War against Pyrrhus going on... and that's the way it was concluded... for their enormous pleasure, for our enormous pleasure...
You know, these acerrimi nemici of the Greeks, were so happy to have a strong ally crushing them from the north... that they couldn't stand in their clothes... but now...



...well, now that all of Italia and Sicilia is strongly in our hands, and that the greek towns of the southern coasts are submitted... ah! so, now that Gerone II of Syracuse, badly defeated by romans at first, and then turned so wisely a good ally of Rome, well, they see, those Carthaginians, that all their plans of conquest of Sicilia and Southern Italy... that all this great plot of domination over the whole Mediterraneum, well, this dream, this crazy dream, is going to fade away... like tears in the rain... I´ve seen things you people wouldn't believe, attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion...I watched C-Beams glitter in the dark near... ehm ops! ok, so i was saying, this Carthaginians marched East trying to take Syracuse...



...and so the battle...



Their huge African Forest Elephants, were already routed, as the enemy General, leading an unit of bush pony elephants, try to break through our lines...



what a waste of animals so friendly, so entertaining... so beloved by childs!



that abstinence syndrome by nano-probes, is so annoying... that it causes to our nice(?!?) C.Aurelius a great head-ache... but he can still lead a charge!



and the end...



...an hard life, an uncertain future...



after that massive defeat, the Carthaginians retreated in the West, where their positions were still strong, but the Roman army, following this retreat, sacked and eslaved Agrigentum, that was presidiated by a Carthaginian garrison. The price of the rescue of its hinabitants was payed by all the greek towns of the region...



among the ruins of Agrigentum, there was found another of these strange pergamenes... the signs were 2 - 6 - 1 ...

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Panormus was sacked too, and then, a last stronghold of punic presence is kept in the fortress of Lillibeum, ehm, ok lets call it just a fortress...



time to crush away this last so undesired presence from the Isle...



A single roman Legion will be sufficient... we hope...



THE DUELLISTS



you were a good guy, at last so betray your eyes...



and a last effort...



there is people so lungimirant, so zealous, who already see here, in this much convulsed time of the history, that so much auspicated decline of the South... well, we say it's just an escatologic delirium... could even be some evil seeds were spreaded, but we, who were just extraneous to all this, will assure a golden and sweet and slowly and slowly... slowly decline for this blessed lands...



uff!.. that was hard!



hmmm... we need a provincial governor now...



and here's tha Man!



...and another of these strange papers came out of nowhere... CODE AKRAGRAS 2 6 0... boh?

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

...ehm, and here's a guy who will have some troubles for sure...



well, as usually... as usually what? ah...! we will just say that the way of the war, is full of accidents and perils...and if you dont follow the stream, and you are not updated on the changes happening among the mob and the high classes... and then, if you just pursue a crazy dream of war, with not a large base of consensus... you could end like a guy that... oh well, we will see that in the next chapter...

TBC




hope enjoyed

[Watchman]

...even Afro Ken thinks it's made of awesome and win.

(Random nitpickery: wouldn't those be "consular guards" or somesuch ? Praetorians were a way later institution right ?)

[Obelics]

...even Afro Ken thinks it's made of awesome and win.

(Random nitpickery: wouldn't those be "consular guards" or somesuch ? Praetorians were a way later institution right ?)

yes, you're right, call it just my personal tribute to the coolness factor, a sort of poetic license... i will call them Consular Guards anyway, when i will addressing them. I know Pretorian Guards term, is taken from the Tent of the General in the Camp, but in effect it is too early to call them in that way i guess.

Another think:
there is a screen-shot showing C.C. Blasio being appointed Consul, and then a screen-shot showing the same guy being appointed Provincial Governor.

The two screenshots are not related, he should have been appointed as a third Praetor (after the urban Praetor and the peregrin Praetor). Anyway it was the Computer who nominated him Governor of Sicily, so i have no guilt in that.

[PersianFire]

"Great update Obelics. Lots of effort into as usual. It's a shame that the Carthies didn't whoop your arse. I thought you were deep in the proverbial judging from their initial advantage of higher ground."

[General Appo]

Brilliant! But why do I keep getting a bad feeling about this Regulus guy? Surely any man named Regulus who invades Africa at the head of a Roman army must be victorious, right?

[Obelics]

why do I keep getting a bad feeling about this Regulus guy? Surely any man named Regulus who invades Africa at the head of a Roman army must be victorious, right?

@Persian Fire, dont worry, you could have "roman scum whiped ass battle"...soon.

[Reno Melitensis]

Fantastic AAR Obelix, I read and laughed all the time. My wife came in the room to see why I was laughing.

Cheers.

[machinor]

Obelics, I gotta say your AARs are absolutly hilarious. Pure genius. I seldom enjoyed an AAR so much.

It was, btw, your Pahlava AAR that made me aware of EB in the first place. For that alone I'm thankful.

[Moosemanmoo]

@Persian Fire, dont worry, you could have "roman scum whiped ass battle"...soon.

[Subedei]

By the may....How is Regulus doing over in Africa? or

[Obelics]

By the may....How is Regulus doing over in Africa? or

bad really bad... you know, i sent there a single legion of untrained legionary to simulate the Atilius Regulus famous legend... (for people who dont know the legend can just check wikipedia "atilius regulus")

anyway i still have not an update ready, today it's a party (it's my name-saint recurrance, dont know what's the word in english, anyway have a virtual little cakes everyone here) so i cant do much... a bit of patience, i will make it fast tomorrow i hope...

salut everyone!

[Subedei]

Have a good party & a beer on me....Cheers!

[Obelics]

@sub, you got your beer, ok, wine in my case, thanks.

anyway sorry for bump the thread, it was just to say i added the "this year in history 261 and 260" on the table 5, that last chapter, under spoilers (who knows... there could be some people who likes to read the tyearinhistory tabs ). So all the TYIH were added from 272 to 260. The 259BC will be present in the next update.

[Obelics]

ok, yesterday, i could not sleep, so i finally complete this strange update, as usually thanks to everyone, feedbacks, bad or good, critics, suggestions, questions etc. are all welcomed. Remember to press F11 on the keyboard that's important as you would read it as i thought it, and here we go with another huge pastiche



















TABULA VI



Ah me, so wine lives longer than miserable man. So let us be merry. Wine is life!
Petronius, Satyricon

so there was this guy at school, it's like he knew everything. A day we met him at the cross-road there near the shop of Pompilia, he told as he would have spilled-out everything about that story of the purpled pallium, yes, we had this lucky day when we got all that money squeezed out of that old velliard of a Lycurgus... it was my idea to put all the money in the purpled pallium, as it seemed a good hide-out... we were to reach Naples, but Ascilto didn't like the idea, cause there, it was too easy to be spotted and imprisoned...you know... a lot of people knew us in the town... So we decided to pass some days allpretty hidden there in the countryside...



i was saying, this stupid boy at school... it's just there seems to be a race of people who pass the life trying to make people happy of what they say, of what they do... never saying, never doing something of their own... he was able to quote Homer in greek the guy, most part from the Iliad... and a few things from the Odissey too, he used to say: WE ROMANS NEED SOME HEROES OF OUR OWN! yes, that's what he used to say the moron... so, i sayd, it was like he knew too much things the boy... even how we were forced to flee from the forest, as those rude paesants there in the village, just spotted us, and you know, those smelling folks, were almost going to put their dirty hands on our tunics, yeah, praises to Mercurius, the god we are devoted... it was me, yes me, who was awaken just in time by those rusty voices there around... what can i say, you know how it goes in these cases, almost completely paralized by a sudden terror... without even daring to look eachother with a mere glassy eye, we started to flee on all fours, hiding in the grass, like wild boars...



well, we got regrouped yes, dont know even why... things that happen in a story, it took a while... but for some reason we were there, still togheter, exhausted but I'd say almost happy, there in some place, just a very good place... yes, but again, as it often goes in the stories blah blah blah, not too much time passed, just the time to recover from the big run... and that joy all suddendly changed in a complete and almost perfect grief, yes! the PERFECT PAIN! as it was sufficient just a look, and we realized something precious was missing... yes... you know, we left the pallium there somewhere in the forest! AH! There is people who is used to whine to the four corners of the world just about the smallest thing... but what a TRUE HIGH REASON it was to cry and whisper left and right to the four winds, like moaning cows, for a loss of that kind! Ah! All those moneys, so nicely stealed, were just lying there somewhere in the forest... cant even realize, in what hands all rapax, they could have fallen...oh!
but... but as usually happens, oh FORTUNA VELUT LUNA etc. etc.! yes! ...dont know who was that God so good so mercyful, passing there around in the sky, who was so nicely moved to pity... and that for some reason decided to bless us... unlucky rogues... just unlucky... strange accidents... we met this stubborn idiot farmer there around, who told us the thieves were not found, but someone found just a purpled pallium, of very nice feature, all decorated etc. that was taken by the wife of one of the peasants. He sayd she was already on the way to the town, there at few hours of walk from that place... that old woman, she was going to sell it in the forum hoping to gain some moneys from it... uff! Ehi, what? another of those papers, im going to make some fire...

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

i dont even tell you at what speed we started to run toward the town, we haven't just a penny to spent for some food, our only worry was that to find that woman and to recover our precious pallium! as we reached the forum, we were so tired and exhausted, we fell there on the ground whining about that damned piece of cloth with all that gold sewn inside... but as we were almost abandoning our hopes, strange case of fortune, a woman among the crowd, fat and shabby, started to walk straight in our direction... pointing with an eye all glassy and rapax, so pretty tipical of the countryside folks, the leather bag that Ascilto had there near around, and that we used to keep those few remaining lupins left-overs of our poor dinner...
well, to say the truth, that leather bag was a present of Gito, yes, that sweet boy just stealed it from the inn we spent some nights, just after we left the villa of that Lycurgus... we didn't even know it, so you can just imagine our surprise, as we saw that ugly fat woman walking so heavily in our direction, yelling to the four corners of the forum, that our leather bag was the bag she lost, claiming to have it back, and calling us thieves... yes, she dared to call us vulgar THIEVES! She, that fat ugly nanny, was the woman who took our Pallium and was going to sell it out! From our side, we started to yell out she had our Pallium, and that she stealed it from us, that fatty bitch of a thief!
But here! look, we were almost forgetting our man there, Atilius Regulus leading his crazy expedition to Africa... TAM TAM TAM!



turning back to the story of the Pallium, a crowd of people there in the forum, soon started getting closer in a circle... you know how it goes, people never think to their business... and among this crowd, there were some officials, who were even more interested to the matter... after some discussing, they decided that if the problem was not resolved among us, they would have taken the bag and the pallium, and will have exposed it the day after in the forum... we know the guys were thinking to put their hands on it, cause they thought we were too timorous to claim it in public... so it is reknown, officials can make some pretty good hoards from this kind of things, people are just too poor, or are too guilty, to go to claim its own things in a public civil contest... so these officials get all this small things they can sell out later... and well, the countryside folks like that old woman, know it even better, cause they are the more cunning, and this is also well known. So it was sufficient just a look among us: me, Gito, Ascilto and the old bitch, and we peaceful decided to exchange our things... we gave it back the leather bag to the woman, and she all happy, returned back the precious pallium to us, never knowing it was just so precious... anyway to not bore you anyfurther, there is a battle here that is going to be fought!



hmmm... you see here things take a dangerous direction... some guys there in the army, were just there for spirit of venture, hoping to gain something from loating...



there was love between our people, it was sayd, will we ever be able to change in someway?



The Carthaginians never dared to fight us on the open ground, there was this dirty mercenary called Santippus, they bought him there among the others, his services came out precious, as he suggested them a way to manoeuvre on the open field... as they never dared before, fearing our stronger infantry...



hmmm... a dream of personal glory... just war for war.



you know the generals of Carthage, they were so cunning, this lineage of vendors, they left the command to this mercenary, they thought if the battle was won, there would have been for sure a way, to claim the victory for themselves among the Senate of Carthage, if it was a defeat, then the guilt of the disaster would have fallen on an unworthy mercenary...



AH! Taken!



the decision was to send him to Rome, together with some punic Legati, trying to convince the Senate of the Urbs, to a treaty of peace, favourable to Carthage...



but nothing to do, a Roman is still a Roman, and all they obtained was that He convinced the Senators to continue the war at all costs, having been in the Punic Capital for a while, he was able to see what was the state of decadence of the town, due to the huge expenses of war...



so it's time to turn back... he sweared, no way to change his mind.



and that's the price for the honour...



ah well, as it was sayd, we got our big hero to build up a mithology of our own, and that's a fact... bytheway here's another one of that papers who came out of nowhere...

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

so, i just dont know why i told you that story on the purpled Pallium... well, there's not a reason to say the truth, it's just a story of quite some years ago... ah yes! that stupid boy at school, well, you know, ehm, the guy he was like to know everything, and there was a vague possibility he would have told it around, just obtaining for us a really bad time... hmmm... it was Ascilto who got the task, he sayd he would have taken care of him, but no... dont worry! we could be that bad, but we are just not assassins, that's sure, you dont even know what is capable to do with his seductive charme that dandy of an Ascilto... lets say that stupid boy was just made a man.

TBC?



hope enjoyed

[Subedei]

Long live Attilus! What a loos...ehhh. loyal Roman!
Now beware of Raoul Carthago! There is no barrel in Africa to be found in which he fits in!
Great work again Obelics!
You earned yourself some sleep now man....Greetz Subedei

[Tristuskhan]

It's getting hot down there... Keep it going, cheat to give money to the Pahlavans and within 25 chapters, Hawarakaramazzz!

[General Appo]

Absolutely brilliant! Now, I hope you take Sardim and Korsim in the next chapter, put some more pressure on those Carthaginian scum.

[Obelics]

Now beware of Raoul Carthago! There is no barrel in Africa to be found in which he fits in!

thanks! that is i nice line i could use in some of the next chapters if you dont mind , you know it's hard to find the words in english for me

cheat to give money to the Pahlavans and within 25 chapters, Hawarakaramazzz!

yes i will do it! i dont want absolutely to play a lot of turn and ending with an huge blue empire in the East... my campaign would be screwed, since i already experienced the big bactrians expansion with other campaign, and id like to have this time an huge Violet Empire of shining Knights... who knows... just imagine if it is possible to switch faction after a while, i coud do somethings interesting... a sort of WL resurrecta...what a pity im not a speady gonzales updater...

Now, I hope you take Sardim and Korsim in the next chapter, put some more pressure on those Carthaginian scum.

well, yes, this update was not a great progression game-play wise more of a story telling i didn't invade corsica and sardinia, cause im still building a military port in Capua that will allow me to recruit a fleet of some importance, following the PF suggestion, id like to have at last a fleet of 2 trireme, 2 pentecontere, and 1 transport. Bytheway i will try to make some real progresses on the next one, promised!

anyway thank you people, so after 6 chapters, i have for now only this few carachters, not again well developed:

Glauco: official of the "Raul Armada of God". He was a former famous General, under the star of Orion, master of the northern wolf style... he is very individual, a bit like Theophilattos in the WL, but he fell under the evil influence of Raul, he thinks that Raul is the only choosen to re-bring Peace in the world...
Ascilto and Gitone: they are the 2 leves skirmishers, they can switch between my two legions, they were first in the Raul legion, then as they tryed to flee in the South (they were trying to hide in Campania) they were intercepted by C.Aurelio Cotta's men and forced in the expedition in Sicily.
After the Taken of Lillibeum, there were prepared this expedition of Atilius Regulus in Africa with fresh recruited legion, and they were sent in Africa, but now they are turning back to Raul, the only man that make them feel secure and safe, and where they have not to do much work (they dont like to work...)
Encolpius: it's the storyteller (the guy face you often see in the screenshots)
Spurius: Centurion of Scipio/Raul
Trasillo: Centurion of C.Aurelius Cotta/SPQR_T1001. Trasillus was lend by Cotta to Atilius during its sad expedition in Africa, Hopefully he survived, and now he returned in Sicilia rejoyining the Army of C.Aurelio Cotta
Also there is Jagger, a man of Raul (hastatus or princeps, i still have not fixed this) who is a resolutive man too.
Regarding the Generals, excluding Attilius/Amiba who is dead, there is Scipio/Raul and Cotta/SpqrT1001. The first name is that of the General, and the second name is that of his "Daimon". The Daimon is not related to a particular general, so if the General will die, that Daimon can pass to another General. For now Scipio has the Daimon of Raul. Amiba Daimon is faded away, cause its daimon was lost in Africa after the death of Atilius Regulus. SpqrT1001, is not a real "Daimon", cause C.A.Cotta, use to inject this nanoprobes in its veins, he is a drugged man. Those are nanoprobes found there around the ruins of a second Borg Cube crashed somewhere near there... (the first Borg Cube crashed in the Waste Land). So if C.A.Cotta will die, there could still be some other general who could become addicted to those nanoprobes, and spqrT1001 could live again...
There are also some Daimons related to enemy generals, like Yuda who faded away after the taken of Region.

ok this was just a provvisory summary, we will see how things will develope further on...

Again i cannot take Massalia, it is already taken by Arverni, and im at peace with them... so as i have built that fleet, i could navigate for Hiberia, to weaken the Carthaginian power in those lands?

[Tristuskhan]

yes i will do it! i dont want absolutely to play a lot of turn and ending with an huge blue empire in the East... my campaign would be screwed, since i already experienced the big bactrians expansion with other campaign, and id like to have this time an huge Violet Empire of shining Knights... who knows... just imagine if it is possible to switch faction after a while, i coud do somethings interesting... a sort of WL resurrecta...what a pity im not a speady gonzales updater...

There was a RTR AAR long ago ("riding with the ennemy") where the author was able to switch between different factions. I don't know how he did this, alas...

[Obelics]

There was a RTR AAR long ago ("riding with the ennemy") where the author was able to switch between different factions. I don't know how he did this, alas...

yes i remember it, it was from Simon if i well remember, a Pontic aar, very nice, i read it. Also i discovered that i dont know how to add money to faction x (i never used cheats), i checked some pages on internet, and i only found add money xxx, but not to faction x (really hope Pahlava will not be destroyed by Bactria in the while), i would also like to create at some point a sort of Hannibal army very strong, i think it is possible via console, i could open a thread in the main page of EB forum to ask better.

[Subedei]

thanks! that is i nice line i could use in some of the next chapters if you dont mind , you know it's hard to find the words in english for me

It would be an honour! I hereby present all the copyrights of above mentioned line [Now beware of Raoul Carthago! There is no barrel in Africa to be found in which he fits in!] to Obelics, creator of some of the bestt AARs of the EB universe!

[eliad91]

What a great and funny AAR,Very anxious to know what happens next
Keep the good job !