Census worker hanged with 'fed' on body

[Lemur]

This story is not fully understood yet, but it could be bad:

The FBI is investigating the hanging death of a U.S. Census worker near a Kentucky cemetery, and a law enforcement official told The Associated Press the word 'fed" was scrawled on the dead man's chest.

The body of Bill Sparkman, a 51-year-old part-time Census field worker and occasional teacher, was found Sept. 12 in a remote patch of the Daniel Boone National Forest in rural southeast Kentucky. The Census has suspended door-to-door interviews in rural Clay County, where the body was found, pending the outcome of the investigation.

Investigators are still trying to determine whether the death was a killing or a suicide, and if a killing, whether the motive was related to his government job or to anti-government sentiment.

It's possible that the man committed suicide, but unlikely, given his profile.

Two other non-political possibilities: Maybe he was mixed up in something he shouldn't have been. Or maybe he stumbled across a local's pot patch or still while doing his census job.

The last, and most troubling possibility is that he was murdered for being a tentacle of ZOG and the Socialist Conspiracy. What do Orgahs think?

[Sasaki Kojiro]

I blame the 24 hour news cycle.

[Beskar]

He was obviously a tentacle of ZOG threatening to undermine the powerful land of the free, America.

[Strike For The South]

Granpappy used to shoot at the census man to. Glad to see this is coming back en vouge

[LittleGrizzly]

Assuming this is some anti goverment murder I hope 'the fed' hits him with everything they have... screw these whacko conspiracy nuts...

[drone]

My guess:

Kentucky + National Forest + Dead Government Dude = Pot farm.

[HoreTore]

Oh for crying out loud.

Finally someone rebels against the oppressive government, and he's hanged?!??!

What happened to the guns?? They haven't been taken yet! America, where are your grapes??

[Xiahou]

Kentucky + National Forest + Dead Government Dude = Pot farm.

I hear growing pot in National Forests is becoming quite a problem.

Edit: Here's an even more relevant link.

The remote and rugged terrain, including the 700,000 acres of the Daniel Boone National Forest, is a pot-grower's paradise — its perfect soil and climate give it a key place in America's "Marijuana Belt."

[drone]

It's called the Bluegrass state for a reason.

[Fragony]

My guess:

Kentucky + National Forest + Dead Government Dude = Pot farm.

Doubt it, why leave someone hanging in the open when the last you can use is attention.

[Beskar]

Maybe it is like the Da Vinci code. He got shot/wounded serverely, so in his final moments, he wrote who did it "Fed" and hung himself up for attention then did a draconian code in sticks and leaves on the floor, starting a quest to find the lost moderator and a evil plot to force a storm in Tosa's teacup.

[AlexanderSextus]

Granpappy used to shoot at the census man to. Glad to see this is coming back en vouge

Only a Texan.

[Beskar]

It's amazing that basically everyone of Lemur's posts are discussing the possibility of this being a suicide.

[Fragony]

Ok everybody figured it out by now, but was it the butler, and did he use a chandalier.

[Xiahou]

Well, it looks like we can put this one to rest. It was suicide.

He apparently arranged the scene to look like a murder because his family wouldn't be eligible for life insurance if he killed himself.

Authorities said Sparkman alone manipulated the scene to conceal a suicide. Police said he had talked with others about ending his life, though authorities did not say specifically who in a news release.

Sparkman had recently taken out two life insurance policies that would not pay out for suicide, authorities said. If Sparkman had been killed on the job, his family also would have been be eligible for up to $10,000 in death gratuity payments from the government.

[Lemur]

It's amazing that basically everyone of Lemur's posts are discussing the possibility of this being a suicide.

And now you know why. It was always a possibility.

[Beskar]

On a forum near you, revenge of the nerco'd thread.