KARTHADAST SENATE GOES HIGH ON WEEDS (Crazy Short Stories of The Kart-Hadastei)

[Ludens]

What kind of language did cutewolf use? I think he allready asterisked all those swearwords...? or did anyone offended by this AAR?

They were only partially censored: the rules are that they should be fully asterisked.

[Cute Wolf]

Oh, The Democracy

Times goes by, since Jebivjetar comes and becomes the most prominent figure, that indirectly dictates the decisions that the Karthadastim senate made. But as you know, a life as a weed farmer ain't always on happy and high terms. Sometimes, Jebivjetar becomes soo bored that even his finest weed only doing a bit of improvement on his mind... because he was bored seein his weed fields grows, cut them, dry them and sold them... repeatedly for some consequentive years. Soon, after the Ambrakia summit that create the Ambrakia Protocol was come into effect in the Spring of 266 BC, his boringness is culminating so he start babbling 'philoshopical' things about politics when he goin high.

On the other side of the Kart-Hadast, the Old Shofet Mago was thinking about the improving education for future Kart-Hadast leaders, and his mind seems to imagine rome really wild things and improvements that could be done... but he only think about that when he was high. So, some of his advisor also think that this effects was the trance to a good philoshophical conditioning, and they have a good idea, why not asking Jebivejtar to lead the education reform in Kart-Hadast? So, at his first realization of the hidden potential that lies deep in Jebivjetar's mind, Mago summons some of his brightest advisors, and they made a visit into Jebivjetar's countryside palace. They come when the time is completely right (or wrong), as Jebivjetar is still high... and grumbling about how democracy sucks...

"Oh... he talks about democracy... the things that those Hellenic Philloshopers babbling about and always try to refine!!!" some of the Advisors said that. "The Gods must infest him with such degree of wisdom... Lord Mago... We think you allready got the right man to give some lectures on the akademia from now..."

And that's Why Jebivjetar is trusted to give this following lectures to some of the brightest of the sons of Kart-Hadast nobilities this day.

(Jebivjetar enter the classroom)

"Good morning boys! How are your high-time doin?!?"

"Awesooomeee Sir!!!!"

"Oh.. ok.... now just get relax, and listen to my story about what the Hellene call 'democracy', and don't forget to write your note... not burn it."

"Now, I heard your previous Hellene lecturers are allready given their opinions about democracy, but I'll start this by giving mine. Just look at this illustrations that I draw... here's the first"

"And compare that with the second!"

"And now, I have a question... which is 'democracy'? Oh, who choose the first pic, and who choose the second pic? Well, whatever you choose, you know, they are both represent democracy in some forms."

"The first one, is the first dogma of democracy, as all of you can see, represent how democracy works at the peace time... you can see plusle, pikachu, and minun there... they have different charges stored in their body, and that represent some political views, either positive currents, alternating currents, or negative currents. The same goes for our great federation of Kart-Hadastei... we could have Barcids, Anti Barcids, and much more... but we are still friends, and every difference on the matters of opinion, must be resolved peacefully in peace time... that's why we, the upperclassmen, have a right to vote, and giving our part to our nation's development."

"But the second, is a really important second dogma when we face some kind of threat, either external or internally... If the executive body feels that some kind of traitors, or potential traitors start to grow from inside, and try to tearing up our unity... the strongest components, such as military, or tigger in this example, should try to eliminate that threat as quickly as possible, with all matters if necessary... then, the remaining components won't become distatisfied, and they'll be happy... look at their happy face after tigger killing pooh... Such dogma lies also in the Pre-Emptive strike doctrine that Kart-Hadast follows, as we often found some potential threat growing from outside, and we must smack them as quickly as possible."

"We have a lot of good example on our first dogma... we should look for our Shofet election that way... well, actually, Lord Mago hold the title "honorary Shofet" because he was doing something good before... but the real Shofet is Bomilkar this time... in the shofet election, we, the senators, propose some certain silly figures that we could dominate as a puppet, leaving the real power on my hands, and then, we choose to determine, which puppet is the stupidest to become a shofet. That's true... the silly Ha'Hamor is a real deal, because the lower classmen will think that his stuborness is a good proof on his indomitableness, while the upperclassmen saw that he didn't have any guts at all."

"The recent example of the second dogma is a better one, as at Iberian lands, Hadrusbal allready crushed some Iberian ecological resistance that block our trade route. There, we got their nerves broken as we raze their city to the ground, and sent their native inhabitants to our concentration camps, so we, Phoenicians, could fill their city with ourself, and some willingly collaborationist natives."

"The battle starts when some ecology-leader, headed by Eskutino, didn't want to remove their blocade on our trade route to Lusotann. Even we allready give our ultimatum and they only stand there, and start bubbling 'Freedom to Iberia! Freedom to Iberia, The Imperialist Kart-Hadast must Gone from our land!'... well, their bubbling was a certain sign of rebellion, and if this situation quickly escalate, the Ambrakia-Protocol signers, especially Epeiros and Sweboz, could then called for truce and try to drag us into a peace confrence, that in truth, has a hidden meaning of giving their freedom. Put aside their Makedonian affairs, Pyrrhos has innate lust to become the international peace maker, and that is another threat"

"To made that matters on Iberia looks like just another rebel-quelling activity, we decide to use minimal Phoenician forces, and use our elite Iberian troopers as the primary 'silencer', with several collaborationist natives as a method to 'prove' international community, that their rebellion isn't justified by their own people."

"First, after they see our troopers assembled, they try to continue their demonstration peacefully... so that's why we use our equites caetratii to skewer some of them, and rouse them into more violent actions, so we could report to the international community, if their meddlesome activity is irritatingly high, that the 'ecology activists' start to attack us first, and report the initial casualities by our equites caetratii as 'accident'."

"So after they get some casualities, their cavalry start to give chase to our equites caetrati and some of our caetrati did become victim of their javelins... so we have our justification to use our heavier cavalry to crush them..."

"Hadrusbal also enjoy some sports, skewering the demonstrators with his personal bodyguards, of course, the international community won't be informed..."

"After that, our infantrymen advance and start to kill them in close combat... as we can expect, after we killed their leader, they start to flee and try to take shelter in nearby town..."

"So that's why we get a military justification to besiege the 'nature-loving' town of baikor... So, did you still remember about the speech that a lusotann boy give when the Ambrakia summit was started... that's it! The remaining ecological activists are atartin to lock themself in the town of Baikor, and our intelligence suggests that some Lusotann hands did play something in their activity, it looks like the Lusotann did support some troops to back up their ecological movements."

"So we create some rams to slam our way through their pitiful palisades... and we did use 'collaborationist natives' once again, and everytime we got involved in Iberia, to give international justifications on our actions."

"It looks like they are now more aggresive than we tought before, as they think they defend the bastion of nature-loving community... well **** the nature, because they start showering our troops with javelins!"

"But then, when their gate are broken... they quickly run to their home and try to disguise themself as harmless civilians..."

"And we decide to give them a nasty time... The one that still stand and fight openly are forced to fight against their own 'blood brothers' so they'll reluctant to fight, as these troops are the same militia as them... not the elites that they learn to hate."

"While our elite troops proceed to slay their last leader, and hung his corpse at the central plaza... this was called 'morale reducing method' and contrary to the international opinion... they are valid tactics on battlefield"

"So we cut them down... burn the city... kill everyone that didn't want to join us... and rape all the women there.... wait... no soldiers are reported to rape boys because there was Iberia, far - far away from the gay tolerating Romaioi and Hellenic cultures. Afterall we won the battle, and at the same time... undermine the international law... that it..."

"That's why we could proudly call ourself a Democratic Nation of Kart-Hadastei"

PART 3 Finished

[Jebivjetar]

rofl mao ze ding dong

i got nothing to say except-

[Rahwana]

Wakakakakak........ I literally rolling on the floor reading those Part 3......

It looks like you involve some kind of International political critics that way.....

But you're really crazy.....
Just watchout if someone will be offended

[Cute Wolf]

rofl mao ze ding dong

i got nothing to say except-

heheh... just wait up till the 4th part comes... you'll abducted into alien spaceship....
Just wait......

Wakakakakak........ I literally rolling on the floor reading those Part 3......

It looks like you involve some kind of International political critics that way.....

But you're really crazy.....
Just watchout if someone will be offended

Eh?
Who'll be offended by this? I'm made sure that I didn't insult anyone particular with this aar.....

[Rahwana]

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

"First, after they see our troopers assembled, they try to continue their demonstration peacefully... so that's why we use our equites caetratii to skewer some of them, and rouse them into more violent actions, so we could report to the international community, if their meddlesome activity is irritatingly high, that the 'ecology activists' start to attack us first, and report the initial casualities by our equites caetratii as 'accident'."


"So after they get some casualities, their cavalry start to give chase to our equites caetrati and some of our caetrati did become victim of their javelins... so we have our justification to use our heavier cavalry to crush them..."


"Hadrusbal also enjoy some sports, skewering the demonstrators with his personal bodyguards, of course, the international community won't be informed..."





"So we create some rams to slam our way through their pitiful palisades... and we did use 'collaborationist natives' once again, and everytime we got involved in Iberia, to give international justifications on our actions."




"And we decide to give them a nasty time... The one that still stand and fight openly are forced to fight against their own 'blood brothers' so they'll reluctant to fight, as these troops are the same militia as them... not the elites that they learn to hate."

Well, actually you did write some briliant (and somewhat o the point) critics toward today's issues... and now, I think this AAR is more than just a comedic AAR... This is comedic AAR laced with certain humanitarian, as well as philoshophical values.....

[Duguntz]

I knew it, I knew it sooo much : Tigger is a Slogonez... He's a sweboz clubman that dictates democratie just in the sweboz way : with a bigger and studier club than others!!!

Just like other today's nations that, for the sake of friendship and respect, I won't name

Being a philosophe is hard today, as any Idea can ''harm'' somebody... as the saying goes : opinions can be dangerous!... pitty!

Hey cute wolf, that is juuuust great!
Sweboz activist! mouhahahahahahaha STOP BABY BURNING... Because of Baal we can't swim in our rivers anymore without finding a leg or an arm...

Here's a baloon!

[Cute Wolf]

Well, actually you did write some briliant (and somewhat o the point) critics toward today's issues... and now, I think this AAR is more than just a comedic AAR... This is comedic AAR laced with certain humanitarian, as well as philoshophical values.....

Yeah yeah... I know.... I was a big fan of South Park, and I read many things about democracy and human rights too, and they are somewhat affecting my AAR in a certain way that understandable even by Cartman!

Hey cute wolf, that is juuuust great!
Sweboz activist! mouhahahahahahaha STOP BABY BURNING... Because of Baal we can't swim in our rivers anymore without finding a leg or an arm...

Here's a baloon!

LOL! you sound like a mix of Greenpeace and Anti Abortion activist man! Of course... the Sweboz prefers men to be killed in hot battles rather than burned away as infant! STOP BABY BURNING!!!

=========================
Next update is tommorow... just wait...

[kidpacific]

I wonder how to recruit Iberial lancer and Iberial heavy swordmen in 271BC, since the two are only recruitable in level 4 foreign barracks.

[vartan]

Easy. You mod. CuteWolf mods all the time.