Urinal technique

[Reenk Roink]

So you know how you have to have a bit of finesse to pee in a urinal without getting it splashed on you?

Most will learn very fast that if you just aim straight ahead you will get some of that backsplash which is just nasty.

I suggest you don't even think about pointing upwards, I have tried it and it is the worst idea possible, you will probably need to change your shirt and wash your chin.

Pointing downwards gets you the most varied results. For some urinals, it is the best way, and you stay nice and dry, but say there is a pool of other piss beforehand, then don't even think about it. Also sometimes those plastic things are at the bottom and those are very splashy. Basically this is a judgement call on your part. High risk high reward.

I've found that the safest way to get very good results is to point sideways. This way minimizes the splash as the stream hits at an angle and the splash is also directed more to your side.

However, I was wondering this recently. Say I start taking ExtenZe to increase performance, and my yankee doodle becomes a little more cumbersome to maneuver in cramped quarters. I might be forced to point downward which in certain cases could be disastrous...

[Louis VI the Fat]

Yeah, it remains a problem. Therefore in public places I usually just use the sink.

[Veho Nex]

What?

[Reenk Roink]

Yeah, it remains a problem. Therefore in public places I usually just use the sink.

I am not going to lie, there have been times where my aim and stability were too poor and I had to use the sink. Actually I've thought about this as well and given the amount of water toilets use, the sink is a lot more ecologically friendly. I just keep going back to the toilet by force of habit (my parents must have potty trained me good... ).

I hope to see a nice sink/toilet hybrid as an alternative for peeing needs be offered soon.

Another thing, and this may be just me, but I always have an instinctive urge to pull my shirt up when I pee. I have to consciously suppress this in a public bathroom (in private I just let myself go).

[Rhyfelwyr]

I like to fill balloons with mine then throw them at old people...

[KukriKhan]

It's why I always like German restrooms the best: water running down the walls continuously, aim your stream anywhere near, at, or toward the wall, and you're good to go - and ready for thye next bier.

[Hosakawa Tito]

If you shake it more than twice yer playing with it.

[Myrddraal]

I encountered a spider in a urinal recently. Naturally, I trained my sights on the innocent creature, only to find that it was painted on the urinal! I wonder how many how much cleaning that little spider has saved.

[drone]

Did MRD hack Reenk's account?

I encountered a spider in a urinal recently. Naturally, I trained my sights on the innocent creature, only to find that it was painted on the urinal! I wonder how many how much cleaning that little spider has saved.

I've seen this done with a fly. Apparently, giving guys something to aim for reduces the cleanup.
http://boingboing.net/2009/12/21/why...ere-chose.html

Personally, I aim for the side. Much less splatter.

[Ice]

Yeah, it remains a problem. Therefore in public places I usually just use the sink.

With alcohol involved, many find this the most feasible solution.

[Centurion1]

You can minimize the splash by adding distance to the shot. And move in as the stream weakens it requires finesse thogh

[Raz]

I just use the cubicles if I'm worried about splash.
Otherwise you can use the urinals that are more like long metallic trench things. Much, much less splash than wall-mounted porcelain ones (unless you're a terrible aim).

[pevergreen]

How can you miss?

[Gregoshi]

How can you miss?

My son and I were pretty amazed when we saw these urinals in Oz last year. I've not seen anything like them in the US. That and the Dyson air "blade" hand dryers - perhaps the coolest invention of all time.

As for technique, aim downward to create as low an angle of impact as possible. Any splash will likewise have a low angle of deflection and be caught in the catch basin. Oh, and not waiting until you have to go so bad that the urine has a flow rate equivalent to a fire hose helps reduce splash too.

[Hosakawa Tito]

My son and I were pretty amazed when we saw these urinals in Oz last year. I've not seen anything like them in the US. That and the Dyson air "blade" hand dryers - perhaps the coolest invention of all time.

As for technique, aim downward to create as low an angle of impact as possible. Any splash will likewise have a low angle of deflection and be caught in the catch basin. Oh, and not waiting until you have to go so bad that the urine has a flow rate equivalent to a fire hose helps reduce splash too.

Or sit down on the throne to take care of business. Better than having to explain away the wet spot on one's trousers.

[Louis VI the Fat]

Or sit down on the throne to take care of business.

But this only works on European sit down toilets.

American toilets have a water level so high that the bottom half my thingy gets submerged. Yuckie.

[pevergreen]

That and the Dyson air "blade" hand dryers - perhaps the coolest invention of all time.

Just google'd them, wow, I've never seen them.

[Secura]

This thread is a valuable insight into male toilet etiquette for the fairer sex... thank you, Reenk. xD

[drone]

This thread is a valuable insight into male toilet etiquette for the fairer sex... thank you, Reenk. xD

http://www.drinknation.com/fun/urinaltest

[Secura]

http://www.drinknation.com/fun/urinaltest

Dear God, I got 40 out of 60.... o_O'

[Pannonian]

Yeah, it remains a problem. Therefore in public places I usually just use the sink.

I knew someone who used the sink once. For a number two.

[Gregoshi]

Just google'd them, wow, I've never seen them.

They work as advertised. Feels like you are sticking your hands through a force field. Hands wet, hands in, hands out, hands dry. Amazing. Melbourne's airport had them and I think a museum there as well. My son wanted us to buy one or two for the house. I was seriously considering it.

[drone]

Dear God, I got 40 out of 60.... o_O'

I got a kick out of this:
http://blog.xkcd.com/2009/09/02/urin...vulnerability/
The comment section is pure gold.

[Pannonian]

I got a kick out of this:
http://blog.xkcd.com/2009/09/02/urin...vulnerability/
The comment section is pure gold.

"Even more awkward is a trough urinal placed in the middle of the mens room floor leading to potential cross streaming, and looking forward at another dudes junk or making eye contact."

Ghostbusters isn't fictional. People just don't realise it's allegorical.

[Hosakawa Tito]

This thread is a valuable insight into male toilet etiquette for the fairer sex... thank you, Reenk. xD

Your worst fears confirmed. There are no jokes it's all really true, the Frenchman's delusions of grandeur notwithstanding, nor sitting. Pass Louis the tripod...

[Zradha Pahlavan]

I hate public bathrooms, so I try to stay as far away from them as possible. But I have used them on occasion, and not once have they ever redeemed themselves.
Here's a particularly nasty "technique" that someone apparently thought of: pooping in the urinal. I'm glad I wasn't there to see him actually do it and I don't know how he did it, but I saw the aftermath. Maybe the toilets were broken. I hope.

Then there was the time when a school toilet was booby-trapped with superglue and someone got stuck to it, but that's another story.

[Louis VI the Fat]

This thread is a valuable insight into male toilet etiquette for the fairer sex... thank you, Reenk. xD

[Thermal]

I don't use public toilets, nevermind urinals. The water gets recycled does it not? So does it benefit the environment?

[Veho Nex]

Dear God, I got 40 out of 60.... o_O'

thats ok i scored 30 outa 60...

[Peasant Phill]

So nobody tries trick shots? Trying to hit both sides at once or making a drawing in the paper that was left in the urinal.
There is always the contest to see who can urinate the highest (I believe pandas do this to).
I also have a friend who tried to 'draw' a circle on the road every chance he got.