I'm having my little swimmers counted
Yes, I'm becoming an old sock. I've settled down with the girl I love. I've asked her to marry me AND we've been trying to have a baby.
Now the baby-trying thingie isn't working out that great so far. My GF has already had some tests and now it's my turn. I'm supposed to drop a cup off of my saturday morning. You know, a cup of my 'little guys in white track suits'.
Does anybody have some experience with this?
Originally Posted by Drone
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Oh boy - this thread will not have a happy ending.
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
That was a very flaccid post sir.
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Of course Whacker would post in this thread.
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Sorry Phill, I derailed a thread that I knew was destined to be derailed.
Anyway, what exactly is the nature of your question? Are you looking for tips on how to increase that count? Or tips on filling the cup? Or are you just looking for someone to swap war stories with?
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Don't worry about the derailment. I wouldn't post it here if I couldn't handle some laughs at my or the 'subject's' expense.
The war story options looks good. I'll only be needing tips on how to increase the count after I have the results.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Perhaps you should do less posting in the Backroom.
Last edited by Beskar; 10-04-2010 at 21:12.
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Not the one in the back. You need to put it in the one up front.
(Belgian)
Last edited by Louis VI the Fat; 10-04-2010 at 21:13.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Maybe they can give you some hands on assistance when it comes to filling the cup.
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Gross.
And... boxer shorts.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
I actually just went through the very same thing. It was a home-test and the sample had to be delivered to the lab within 1/2 hour. To increase difficulty level I live in a fairly rural area the sample could only be dropped off between 11:00 and 11:15, so I had to get the timing just right. The test literature said that the sample must be "kept warm" so I tucked the container under my arm pit on the drive to the bio testing facility.
I did some speeding during the drive and when I got to the lab, on time and under budget, I was thinking "man good thing the cops didn't pull me over or that would have been an an epic story!" Since I had the container under my arm pit I'd be like "you don't wanna frisk me right now... trust me!"
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
And here I thought that was a joke about the Greeks.Not the one in the back. You need to put it in the one up front.
(Belgian)
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Now that would have been a good story.
I also have to bring it in ASAP. I live about a half hour away from the hospital. I don't think I'll be holding it under my armpit though.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
You need help getting your gf pregnant? Why didn't you just ask Bill? :P
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Listen man, if things don't turn out too good for you, just holla at me. I'd be glad to make some donations towards the begginning of new life in your woman's womb.
Of course, in many respects, I am a very conservative person with naturalistic tendencies. If we're doing this, my life-force will have to be injected the natural way, the way it's suppose to be done. Please keep in mind that I am a superior specimen with above-average height, intelligence, and good looks.
Last edited by Megas Methuselah; 10-04-2010 at 23:30.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
LOL
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
My wife and I had been trying for over two years to make a baby. There was a miscarriage along the road and afterwards, the dr. told us that the only positive thing about that was that we could be sure that all was working fine. More than a year after the miscarriage, still no succes though. My wife made an appointment in February this year with the doc and he asked for a sample of my little swimmers. It also had to be turned in quick in the hospital (luckily for us, it's only a 5 minute drive) and he had suggested that my wife would keep it warm by putting the container in her bra.
Apparently, my little swimmers decided that they didn't want a test and my wife got pregnant in January, meaning the sheduled appointment was for a first check-up on the pregnancy instead of having the test.
I hope your fertility problems aren't too bad and that your wishes become true sooner rather than later
Last edited by Andres; 10-05-2010 at 08:38.
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Zinc.
#Hillary4prism
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
First I need to know if I have a problem. Then I'll see if there is anything to help it along.
Also my lady is very civilised. All posting in the backroom must be reserved at least 10 days before.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Are you "trying" to have children? Take Yoda's advice. Sometimes the stress of trying (and the event you just mentioned) can cause enough stress to prevent pregnancy.
Just act carefree, reckless, and young! (from someone who doesn't know better. sorry)
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Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Hmm, I met this cute cougar over last christmas holiday bar-hopping...
Last edited by Lemur; 10-06-2010 at 01:08.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Thnx for your written statement that you're the real father. Can I have your address please, I have some bills I'd like to send you.
I can assure you that I'll happily raise your child on your expenses.
At the moment we are in dire need of a BMW, a playstation 3, an Xbox 360, a plasma tv and a villa with swimming pool; the latter being the most urgent. Please send us 500.000,00 € to cover the first expenses. I'm sure this won't be a problem, since I assume you, just like us, wish the best for your child.
Last edited by Andres; 10-06-2010 at 09:45.
Andres is our Lord and Master and could strike us down with thunderbolts or beer cans at any time. ~Askthepizzaguy
Ja mata, TosaInu
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Lawyers FTW. Andres, have you ever seen the show "community"? It's the best American comedy on TV right now and the main character is a lawyer.
Also, good luck Phill.
CR
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Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Kids don't need any of that. I grew up in the city's worst neighbourhood with a single mom who struggled to get us by, 4 television channels (one of which was French), hand-me-down clothes, and a diet of mainly rice, kraft dinner, and food donations. As soon as I was old enough, I took up a paper route to buy us some better food and blankets to shelter us against the winter frost.
Whatever the case may be, if I offended you, it was not what I wanted. Sorry, bro.
Last edited by Megas Methuselah; 10-07-2010 at 05:53.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Is it a new show? If so, then it'll probably take a year or two before it'll be broadcasted here; maybe less if it's really popular in the US. I'll try to keep it in mind.
Hey, don't worry, I wasn't offended in the slightest. I was just poking some fun back at you
Andres is our Lord and Master and could strike us down with thunderbolts or beer cans at any time. ~Askthepizzaguy
Ja mata, TosaInu
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Good luck Phil. Modern science has developed some amazing treatments to help couples conceive. My three youngest nieces are proof of that. Hopefully they'll be able to help you too.
"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." *Jim Elliot*
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
This post will not end well.
They got books to help people like you Phill btw.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
I can 'make my contribution' at home so I don't need books I have misses phill.
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
That could've been a sticky situation...
Re: I'm having my little swimmers counted
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