There is a difference between calling someone a racist and calling someone stupid. You can stop being a racist from one minute to the next but you can't become more intelligent just because you want to.

People have been called racist here long before Beskar moderated the Backroom and just because you don't like being called something that does not mean it has to be against the rules. We've had cases before of people who didn't like to be called racists even though a lot of people thought that it was objectively the case that they made racist statements.

If you can prove that Lizardo stuck Crayons up his nose, maybe you can have an argument about whether your own questions were justified.
Even if Gaius had no good reason to say you hate black people, neither did you for insinuating that he beats his wife -> you started it -> cry me a river...