Naked Man Arrested for Concealed Weapon

[yesdachi]

"You can't get much more concealed than that," Horgan said.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

EL CERRITO, Calif. - A man was arrested on suspicion of carrying a concealed weapon after police found him outdoors _ naked _ and he told them he had a tool in his rectum, authorities said.

The man was lying on a tree stump, masturbating beside a nature path, near a Bay Area Rapid Transit station Thursday, police said.

John Sheehan, 33, of Pittsburg, was initially arrested on suspicion of indecent exposure. But when asked whether he was carrying anything police should know about, Sheehan mentioned the tool, said El Cerrito Detective Cpl. Don Horgan.

"You can't get much more concealed than that," Horgan said.

Officers drew their weapons and firefighters were called to the scene. Sheehan removed a 6-inch metal awl wrapped in black electrical tape without incident.

Sheehan, who was paroled from state prison last week, was then booked into jail on suspicion of parole violations, indecent exposure and one felony count of possessing a concealed weapon.

"When you're talking about an awl or an ice pick and you're dealing with somebody who's fresh out of prison, it's a weapon. That's a stabbing instrument," Horgan said.

I wasn’t sure what an awl was so I looked it up; let me save you the trouble… awl.

[Kralizec]

Do you think the guy would have been charged for possessing a "stabbing weapon" if he had been carrying it in a bag, rather then his rectum?

[Sasaki Kojiro]

Wouldn't have been concealed then.

Crazy man, lol.

[Major Robert Dump]

I don't see why anything he was doing was illegal.

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Sheehan, who was paroled from state prison last week

Yeah, the last time I got parole I went and masturbated naked in a public place with a screwdriver up my rectum too.

[Seamus Fermanagh]

With that last name, and occuring in would-be committee chair G. Miller's district, I don't think we can rule out a Karl Rove November surprise here.

[Ronin]

*tries for a few seconds to put some words down*

[Papewaio]

I take it he prefers to be in prison then on the streets...

[ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88]

lol man, that must have Hurt. Crazy Stupid People. Worest Yet is, He From Pittsburgh.,.

[Del Arroyo]

Just another day in San Francisco...

[ajaxfetish]

With a title like that you know the thread is going to be good. Then the whole story only makes it better.

Ajax

[CountArach]

lol, that is a brilliant story! It was the story that just kept on giving...

[Hepcat]

I am lost for words

[drone]

I guess this is the one useful skill you learn in prison.