That's the last time I invite Mithrandir to a party...

[Banquo's Ghost]

Camels, meh.

You can't take them anywhere. Binge drinkers, the lot of 'em.

Guinness-guzzling camel crashes Xmas party
08 December 2006

DUBLIN: Staff at an Irish riding school were forced to postpone festivities after Gus the camel chomped his way through 200 mince pies and several cans of Guinness intended for their Christmas party.

Gus, starring in the riding school's Santa's Magical Animal Kingdom show, helped himself to the feast while staff were getting changed for the party.

"Gus found his way out of his pen and helped himself," Robert Fagan, owner of the Mullingar Equestrian Centre in central Ireland, told Reuters.

The 11-year-old camel, originally from Morocco, cracked open six cans of Ireland's famous stout with his teeth after the door to his stall was left open.

Gus appeared well after Monday evening's feeding frenzy, Fagan said, adding: "We were all looking forward to it, but you couldn't blame him. He's really a very gentle, docile sort of camel."

[Aenlic]

You can't make the really good stuff up. Another good one, BG!

[drone]

How much Guinness could a standard camel store in his hump?

[GoreBag]

200 pies. Wow.

[Crazed Rabbit]

I think mince pies are muffin sized or thereabouts.

BG, that sounds like a rollicking good time!

Crazed Rabbit

[Louis VI the Fat]

Gah! That camel's got nothing on this cat:

[Mithrandir]

You really should blame Martok though, he is master of my stables, so it's his fault my trusty Gus escaped.

[Fragony]

[QUOTE=Louis VI the Fat] Gah! That camel's got nothing on this cat

Noob cat, take this one;







Now that is felix sylvestris mucho attitudos

[Vladimir]

LOOK OUT!!! Angry zombie cat back from the dead. Not even being run over by that car can stop him.

[Lemur]

This story reminds me of the classic Onion column by A Goat, Hey, You Gonna Eat That?

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Hey, You Got Something To Eat?

By A Goat

Say, I'd like to eat a little something. You got something? What you got? Any kind of food is good. I just want something to eat. You must got something. I ain't desperate or nothing like that. Don't think I'm begging. I'm just asking here. No pressure. I just want to eat something. Wondering if you had something maybe. No big deal.

You gotta have something. Please. What is that? A thing to eat? I think it might be.

I'm not that hungry. I just ate. I could take or leave it. Got a handful of hard seeds? I'll take them. Pour them on the ground or just hold them out. You kidding? That would be great. Sure would. Whatever you got, really. It don't even have to be seeds. I'll take anything. Don't worry about me. I'm easy. Hey, anything you got. I'll try it. I got a open mind.

You gonna eat that shoe? I'll eat that shoe if you're not gonna eat it.

Come on, what you got? I just want to know. I don't have to eat it. I'm just curious. In truth, there's a good possibility I'll eat it. But still. I want to know. If you got just a morsel of anything, I'd be obliged. If I knew you were good for a scrap once in a while, I'd probably come back to you for more food sometimes. You wouldn't mind that. Of course not. You're my buddy. The food-giver. That's what I'd call ya.

I bet you got a nice pant leg. Lemme chew a hole in it. I could chew it until you yanked it out of my mouth. If you don't mind. I'm telling you, I could use a little something to chomp on. I could wait, but what have you got? I don't care very much one way or the other. Come on, give me a break over here. I just want something to nibble on.

Hey! What's down there? A piece of bread? Let's see what we got. No... No, this is a rock. I'm not going to eat a rock. What do you think, I'm crazy?

You keeping a sandwich in your pocket for later? I'd be happy to eat it for you now. You don't even have to take it out of the bag. I'll eat the plastic and everything. Or tinfoil. Don't make no never mind to me. Do you got anything that I could put in my mouth for just a minute or two? Lemme know. I'll take it off your hands. No worries.

Do you have any trash? I'll eat trash. You were gonna throw it out anyway. Hey, lemme eat it. Lemme at least taste it. If it's no good to eat, I'll know. I hate to see it go to waste, is all.

Got a balled-up tissue? Some paper towels? Coffee filters? Grounds, perhaps? Some cardboard? Insulation? All that sounds good to me. Just about anything like that would hit the spot for me about now.

A piece of corn on the cob. That'd do me. You got that? Would you mind going and picking me a ear from the cornfield? I don't care if it is seed corn or sweet corn or feed corn. I don't care if it's too hard to chew. I'll just swallow it whole. Just swallow it down. Who cares? I don't. Seriously, go over and snatch me one of them ears of corn. I'll get you back. Maybe I could eat something else for you later, something maybe that you're not interested in eating. Or maybe something that you intend to only eat half of. I might be able to eat the rest of it for you.

I've tried about enough of the grass around here to last me a while. I'm sick of this grass. This damned same grass day in and day out, I could just about... I take that back. This grass is okay. I'll eat it. It's pretty good. It's great, actually. I mean, it's okay. Could you grab me a handful of weeds from the ditch? Don't bother shaking off the dirt! That's a waste of time! Just bring it over as is. Wave that near my mouth and it's going down the belly hatch. I am not joking. I'll eat weeds. Just watch me. You give me a rotten apple, and I will eat that whole thing, seeds and all. Tear off a piece of bark for me, and it's gone.

Hey. Come on. Don't be greedy. I said I'd like a little something to eat. Put something in my mouth now. Let me chew something, you *******.

Oh ****, man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. That was uncalled for. There's no problem. I'm really sorry, friend. Food-giver. That's what you are. There's the stuff. Food-giver. You're my friend.

Hey, by the by... You got anything to eat? Don't go out of your way on my account. It's nothing, really—I don't need nothing. But if you got something, I'll eat it.

[Tribesman]

The 11-year-old camel, originally from Morocco, cracked open six cans of Ireland's famous stout with his teeth after the door to his stall was left open.

Yeah , but I must ask , since it was that crap "Draught Guinness" in a can then surely you wouldn't even feed that rubbish to a tourist camel .
The camel will get back to Morroco saying the Irish Porter was ***** and saying that the local Flag Brun Beer is a wonderfully sufficient substitute .

Though a question must be asked , since the Christmas do only had 20 employees at it , yet they had two hunded pies , are they really greedy fat(incompatible language )ers .
Or alternatively , who ate all the pies ?

[KukriKhan]

Short Camel Story, with a "listen" link (about a 3-minute piece), about Australian feral camels and what to do about them, from US Nat'l Public Radio. Heard this today, and immediately thought of Mithrandir. :)

Man, those beasties can belch - and almost talk!