News of the Weird

[Husar]

That's hilarious Banquo.

[woad&fangs]

Thanks BQ, that made my day.

[Lemur]

Deputy mayor killed by marauding monkeys.

Monkeys kill Delhi deputy mayor

The deputy mayor of the Indian capital Delhi has died a day after being attacked by a horde of wild monkeys.

SS Bajwa suffered serious head injuries when he fell from the first-floor terrace of his home on Saturday morning trying to fight off the monkeys.

The city has long struggled to counter its plague of monkeys, which invade government complexes and temples, snatch food and scare passers-by.

The High Court demanded the city find an answer to the problem last year.

Solution elusive

One approach has been to train bands of larger, more ferocious langur monkeys to go after the smaller groups of Rhesus macaques.

The city has also employed monkey catchers to round them up so they can be moved to forests.

But the problem has persisted.

Culling is seen as unacceptable to devout Hindus, who revere the monkeys as a manifestation of the monkey god Hanuman, and often feed them bananas and peanuts.

Urban development around the city has also been blamed for destroying the monkeys' natural habitat.

Mr Bajwa, a member of the opposition Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP), is survived by his wife and a son, according to the Press Trust of India news agency.

[Gregoshi]

Apparently there were a few monkeys the deputy mayor just couldn't get off his back...

Of course, this led to his fall from power...

[Lemur]

How much are you really worth?

[The Wizard]

Congratulations, your dead body is worth $4950!

Ooh. I need that money. BRB guys, time to go fetch the nine millimeter aspirin

[The Wizard]

Excuse the double post, but it needs to be here.

Ripe love ends tragically.

[woad&fangs]

My corpse is worth $4765

[Husar]

That cadaver calculator even had it's own thread here in the Backroom some months ago.

[Lemur]

Dang it, I have posted a dupe. Apologies!

File this under the Moms Behaving Badly file (along with the Mother's Day Riot reported earlier in the thread).

Drunk driving mom arrested after her 8-year-old calls 911.

A woman has been arrested for investigation of drunken driving and other charges following repeated calls to 911 from her 8-year-old son, who was in the car, Clark County sheriff's deputies said. [...]

"He said 'I don't know where we are, and Mom's not acting normal,"' Walker said.

As the operator began asking the boy for landmarks and the direction the car was traveling, Walker said, Spears took the cellular telephone from the boy, told the dispatcher not to worry and hung up.

The boy called back, and again his mother cut short the call, Walker said.

"The mother kept interrupting the 8-year-old," he said. "It happened at least twice."

At one point, Walker said, Spears apparently bit the boy's hand to get the telephone away from him.

[Husar]

No need to apologise, next time I'll just send you a "Great post!"-PM.

[Crazed Rabbit]

The host of "Inside the Actor's Studio", James Lipton, was a pimp. In France. In Paris itself.

http://www.abcactionnews.com/enterta...e-195173ea65e5

Actors Studio host Lipton was a pimp in France

James Lipton, the host of U.S. talk show, Inside the Actors' Studio, once worked as a pimp in Paris, France.

The revered TV presenter, who has sat down with Hollywood's biggest names for in-depth chats about their life and work over the last 13 years, has revealed he once procured clients for French hookers.

He says, "This was when I was very very young, living in Paris, penniless, unable to get any kind of working permit... I had a friend who worked in what is called the Milieu, which is that world and she suggested to me one night, `Look, you'll be my meck... We would translate it perhaps... as pimp.

"We were earning our living together, this young woman and I, we made a rather good living, I must say."

Lipton reveals in his new book Inside Inside he would set up sex shows for clients of his lady friend.

He adds, "I had to accompany my clientelle to the Rue Pigalle, which is where these things occurred. And then I'd take them up to the room and I had to remain there because they were very nervous, they were young Americans for the most part... and they didn't speak French."

CR

[Crazed Rabbit]

What do you do when a major metropolitan area has only 69 days of water for such essentials as, you know, not dying of thirst?

You spray large amounts of water on athletic fields! Athletic fields with fake turf!

It's not even real grass.

But in the midst of what may be the worst drought ever in North Carolina, Duke University and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill are watering the synthetic turfs used by their field hockey teams.

The International Hockey Federation insists.

The universities are not breaking any rules. But like clockwork, as residents in Durham and Chapel Hill see their plants and lawns wither, the sprinklers go on at the UNC-CH Francis E. Henry Stadium and at Duke's Williams Field.

Brad Schnurr, a Chapel Hill contractor who does work in Durham, saw the sprinklers go on one afternoon recently at Duke and drove around the block to make sure he was not seeing things.

"Sprinklers aren't even the right term, they're like fire hoses," Schnurr said. "I was like, 'What is that? What is that?' I couldn't believe it."

CR

[Prodigal]

old news

[Husar]

Clicky

Clicky

[Andres]

Woman in wheelchair takes highway shortcut

BERLIN (Reuters) - An 81-year-old German woman driving to a cemetery in her electric wheelchair decided to take a shortcut and drove the wrong way down a highway.

The wheelchair had been traveling at about four miles per hour. Vehicles on German motorways must clock at least 37 miles per hour, and there is no upper speed limit on some sections.

Motorists spotted the woman and notified authorities, who escorted her to safety.

"She told us she got lost and wanted to avoid taking a big detour," a police spokesman in the southern city of Nuremberg said.

[InsaneApache]

Nice to see that the Nuremberg police rallied to her aid..... I'll get me coat.

[Lemur]

I think it's only right that after helping an old lady off the highway, an on-duty cop should be able to pound some brewskis and have sex. Why, oh why, are these new guidelines being issued?

Man, being a cop just gets worse and worse!

Tue Oct 23, 2007 11:30am EDT

BRUSSELS - Police patrolling the red-light district of the Belgian capital have been ordered to stop visiting brothels and drinking in bars when on duty.

A letter sent to officers in Brussels' northern police district, and published in a Belgian daily Tuesday, urged them to set a good example and earn the public's respect.

"These officers think their duty hours are to be used to drink alcohol in bars, practice sports..., visit brothels or massage parlors, and entertain (intimate) relationships with residents of the neighborhood during their patrol," said the letter from a local police chief.

"It is only by setting a good example that the police can make itself respected," the letter said, urging officers to adopt more conservative behavior.

A police spokesman confirmed the letter was authentic, but said the police chief had only reacted to rumors of officers behaving badly while on duty.

"There was no concrete evidence to substantiate any wrongdoing by police officers ... If there had been, they would have been prosecuted," said spokesman Roland Thiebauld.

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

Woman in wheelchair takes highway shortcut

Alright! A local story.

[Louis VI the Fat]

Oral and Anal sex legalised in Singapore

October 23, 2007

SINGAPORE today legalised oral and anal sex between heterosexual couples but retained a law which criminalises intercourse between gay men.

In the city-state's first major penal code amendments in 22 years, Parliament repealed a section criminalising “carnal intercourse against the order of nature”.

More kink in this link.


For a brief moment I thought I had a real biggie for this thread, but alas, I misread two letters in this article's title:
Idol's Dicko canned by US critics

[Ronin]

I think it's only right that after helping an old lady off the highway, an on-duty cop should be able to pound some brewskis and have sex. Why, oh why, are these new guidelines being issued?

Man, being a cop just gets worse and worse!

Tue Oct 23, 2007 11:30am EDT

BRUSSELS - Police patrolling the red-light district of the Belgian capital have been ordered to stop visiting brothels and drinking in bars when on duty.

A letter sent to officers in Brussels' northern police district, and published in a Belgian daily Tuesday, urged them to set a good example and earn the public's respect.

"These officers think their duty hours are to be used to drink alcohol in bars, practice sports..., visit brothels or massage parlors, and entertain (intimate) relationships with residents of the neighborhood during their patrol," said the letter from a local police chief.

"It is only by setting a good example that the police can make itself respected," the letter said, urging officers to adopt more conservative behavior.

A police spokesman confirmed the letter was authentic, but said the police chief had only reacted to rumors of officers behaving badly while on duty.

"There was no concrete evidence to substantiate any wrongdoing by police officers ... If there had been, they would have been prosecuted," said spokesman Roland Thiebauld.

I don´t see what the problem is....I always considered "proximity policing" to be at the core of a safer city

[Lemur]

I say, if an Australian barmaid wants to crush beer cans between her breasts, do not stand in her way. Take heed, Canberra.

No can do! Court fines bare-breasted Aussie barmaid

Wed Oct 24, 2007 9:46am EDT

CANBERRA - An Australian barmaid has been fined for crushing beer cans between her bare breasts while an off-duty colleague has been fined for hanging spoons from her friend's nipples, police said on Wednesday.

Police in Western Australia said the 31-year old barmaid pleaded guilty in the local magistrate's court to twice exposing her breasts to patrons at the Premier Hotel in Pinjarra, south of the state capital, Perth.

The woman "is alleged to have also crushed beer cans between her breasts during one of the offences", in breach of hotel licensing laws, police from the Peel district of Western Australia said in a statement.

The barmaid and the hotel manager were both fined A$1,000 ($900), while an off-duty barmaid was fined A$500 for helping to hang spoons from the woman's nipples, police said.

"It sends a clear message to all licensees in Peel that we will not tolerate this type of behavior in our licensed premises," local police superintendent David Parkinson said.

[drone]

I say, if an Australian barmaid wants to crush beer cans between her breasts, do not stand in her way. Take heed, Canberra.

Smashing!


It's that time of year again in India: Drunken Elephant Season

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Wild Elephants Electrocuted in India After Drinking Rice Beer

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

GAUHATI, India — Six Asiatic wild elephants were electrocuted as they went berserk after drinking rice beer in India's remote northeast, a wildlife official said Tuesday.

Nearly 40 elephants came to a village on Friday looking for food. Some found beer, which farmers ferment and keep in plastic and tin drums in their huts, said Sunil Kumar, a state wildlife official.

They got drunk, uprooted a utility pole carrying power lines and were electrocuted in Chandan Nukat, a village nearly 150 miles west of Shillong, the capital of Meghalaya state, Kumar said.

"There would have been more casualties had the villagers not chased them away," said Dipu Mark, a local conservationist.

[Banquo's Ghost]

Whilst the eyes of the civilised world are focussed on the Octosquid menace, their furry outriders of doom are immolating themselves in suicide bombings - and demonstrating a terrifying grasp of 4th generation warfare.

Flaming kamikaze squirrel torches car.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Sciurine death dive does for Toyota Camry

By Lester Haines
Published Wednesday 24th October 2007 09:55 GMT

A New Jersey woman's Toyota Camry last week suffered a sciurine kamikaze attack during which a flaming squirrel fell onto the vehicle, slid into the engine compartment and provoked an explosion which destroyed the parked vehicle, the Jersey Journal reports.

Lindsey Millar, 23, and bruv Tony, 22, were at home in Bayonne last Wednesday lunchtime when the incident occurred. The animal had apparently decided it was a really good move to chew through overhead powerlines directly above the motor, and was duly fried for its trouble.

Tony Millar explained: "The squirrel chewed through the wire, was set on fire, fell down directly to where the car was. The squirrel, on fire, slid into the engine compartment and blew up the car."

He added: "They're always coming around here, chewing through the garbage."
Ms Millar is apparently fully insured for incendiary squirrel strike, although her brother concluded: "It's something to laugh about once she has a new car. It's not funny yet."

As a rather poignant footnote, the Jersey Journal notes that the Millars' house is fully decked out in anticipation of Halloween, "complete with a tiny plastic tombstone on their front lawn". Tony Millar said the family "will consider dedicating the tombstone to the squirrel". ®

Nuts.

[Lemur]

Pro tip: If you're hard up for weird news, just check out Japan. They've been coming up with weird since the dawn of time.

Example: The car toilet.

Gives new meaning to "going in the car"

Tue Oct 23, 2007 11:30am EDT

TOKYO - If you're stuck in traffic when Mother Nature calls, Japan's Kaneko Sangyo Co. has developed the loo for you.

The manufacturer of plastic car accessories drew back the curtain on Tuesday on its new portable toilet for cars.

The toilet comes with a curtain large enough to conceal users and a plastic bag to collect waste.

"The commode will come in handy during major disasters such as earthquakes or when you are caught in a traffic jam," a company official told reporters, according to Kyodo News.

Japan is situated on the Pacific "Ring of Fire" and accounts for about 20 percent of the world's earthquakes of magnitude 6 or greater.

Drivers stranded by tectonic movements or stuck in tailbacks simply assemble the cardboard toilet bowl, fit a water-absorbent sheet inside and draw round the curtain.

The product is small enough to fit inside a suitcase, the company said.

But prospective customers will have to hang on until November 15, when the firm begins selling the new product online.

[Louis VI the Fat]

Whilst the eyes of the civilised world are focussed on the Octosquid menace, their furry outriders of doom are immolating themselves in suicide bombings - and demonstrating a terrifying grasp of 4th generation warfare.

Flaming kamikaze squirrel torches car.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Sciurine death dive does for Toyota Camry

By Lester Haines
Published Wednesday 24th October 2007 09:55 GMT

A New Jersey woman's Toyota Camry last week suffered a sciurine kamikaze attack during which a flaming squirrel fell onto the vehicle, slid into the engine compartment and provoked an explosion which destroyed the parked vehicle, the Jersey Journal reports.

Lindsey Millar, 23, and bruv Tony, 22, were at home in Bayonne last Wednesday lunchtime when the incident occurred. The animal had apparently decided it was a really good move to chew through overhead powerlines directly above the motor, and was duly fried for its trouble.

Tony Millar explained: "The squirrel chewed through the wire, was set on fire, fell down directly to where the car was. The squirrel, on fire, slid into the engine compartment and blew up the car."

He added: "They're always coming around here, chewing through the garbage."
Ms Millar is apparently fully insured for incendiary squirrel strike, although her brother concluded: "It's something to laugh about once she has a new car. It's not funny yet."

As a rather poignant footnote, the Jersey Journal notes that the Millars' house is fully decked out in anticipation of Halloween, "complete with a tiny plastic tombstone on their front lawn". Tony Millar said the family "will consider dedicating the tombstone to the squirrel". ®

Nuts.

Nuts! Nuts, indeed, are our one chance at fending off this new menace. Lots of nuts:

Squirrel pays price for nutty idea

Thursday October 25, 2007

A squirrel had to be rescued from a bird feeder after eating so many nuts that it could no longer squeeze through the bars, the RSPCA said today.
RSPCA inspector Graham Hammond was called in by a resident in Christchurch, Dorset, when they found the animal stuck in the peanut-filled bird feeder on October 17.

Mr Hammond said the squirrel had managed to climb into the wire-frame feeder, but had then lost its svelte figure after gorging itself on the nuts inside.

"This was quite an unusual rescue," he added. "I think this squirrel had eyes bigger than its stomach. "After it had stuffed itself with nuts, it had a stomach too large to escape the feeder - one which, ironically, was designed to be squirrel-proof."
Mr Hammond said the grey squirrel, which was unharmed, ran off immediately.

[Gregoshi]

Whilst the eyes of the civilised world are focussed on the Octosquid menace, their furry outriders of doom are immolating themselves in suicide bombings - and demonstrating a terrifying grasp of 4th generation warfare.

Flaming kamikaze squirrel torches car.


...Nuts.

Roasted nuts...

[Husar]

World's most advanced fighter jet is already corroding

The manufacturers of the Air Force's newest fighter jet knew years ago that the composition of some mechanical access panels made the F-22 Raptor susceptible to corrosion. Military officials even changed the design to fix the problem.
But a decade later in a program already fraught with setbacks, the design flaw reappeared. Now, about two-thirds of the military's fleet of Raptors are suffering from corrosion, prompting the Air Force to speed up the timeline for bringing the aircraft through Hill Air Force Base for depot-level maintenance.
"So the world's most expensive, most advanced aircraft is in the shop for repairs for something simple that someone figured out a long time ago?" said Nick Schwellenbach, national security investigator for the Project On Government Oversight.
"I'd like to say I was outraged, and it is outrageous," Schwellenbach said, "but it's all too common."
The Project on Government Oversight has exposed numerous other problems with the Raptor, which costs more than $130 million per plane - and nearly three times that, when research, development and other costs are factored in.

You don't really have to see them on a radar if they already fall apart by themselves, do you?

[Lemur]

I'm convinced that Japanese culture is weirder than flaming suicide squirrels, and now I have proof. Eight videos, and they're so weird ... I don't really know how to describe them. I think they're selling little plastic baby toys. Maybe.

Whatever you do, don't click on the baby with the soft-serve chocolate ice cream head. That way madness lies.

[Husar]

If I didn't know they're from Japan I'd say they're very disturbing.