Anti-Smacking Law

[Hepcat]

Hmm... the NZ government wants to introduce a new anti-smacking law in some kind of rather feeble attempt to lessen domestic violence.

Now I am opposed to this because when I was little I knew that if I misbehaved I would get a smack, and I don't believe that is domestic violence since it wasn't a beating. I know that there are families in which children are beaten but will this law change that?

My theory is that it will only make parents frightened of their own children reporting them for domestic violence. What happens when a little kid has a row with their parents then goes up to a police man knowing he can get back at them by saying they were hit by their parents? And whats more is how are the police supposed to PROVE it!

So what are people's views here? Should it be legal to discipline children how the parents see fit or must everything be done with a kind word and a cookie nowadays?

[Fragony]

When I got smacked I deserved it, nothing wrong with a little tough love. Leave parenting to the parents.

[Adrian II]

When I got smacked I deserved it, nothing wrong with a little tough love.

*smacks Fragony*

[Kralizec]

@Adrian II: don't worry, I don't think that this law covers smacking if it happens between consenting adults.

[Fragony]

*smacks Fragony*

pappa?

[Husar]

I agree, a little smacking here and there is only healthy for kids.
My parents smacked me and I respected them, they changed that with my little sister and it's sad to have to say that she is a spoiled brat and doesn't really respect my mom, only my dad and I have some authority over her which has to do with our physical strength mostly. With my mom she always engages in endless discussions until my mom gets tired and gives up and my sister knows that very well I think.
A bit of is sometimes needed to raise a nice person, parents need to know where to stop though, I'm not talking about beating kids up.

Reminds me of that movie "... this is your oath *smack* and that's so you remember it."

[Lorenzo_H]

pappa?

Big Brova's watchin' you

back on topic, If I didn't get smacked when I needed it, I wouldn't be the person I am today. I'm against this kind of law, anywhere.

[HoreTore]

This is already illegal here in Norway.

And I'm quite happy with that, actually.

[TB666]

This is already illegal here in Norway.

And I'm quite happy with that, actually.

Same here in Sweden.
I have never gotten smacked and I turned out good.

[Sjakihata]

It is illegal to smack children in school, at home and of course to hit women (or the other way around) in denmark. I think that is progress - smacking isnt good for anyone. Not the parent and certainly not the child, that's abuse.

Move on, welcome to the 21st century.

[Vladimir]

Oh dear. What has happened to Scandinavians.

[Kralizec]

I suggest sleep-deprivation and waterboarding as alternatives, then.

[Vladimir]

I suggest sleep-deprivation and waterboarding as alternatives, then.

I don't think that would work on children. They always want to stay up late and go swimming. Cranky, wet children are a form of torture used on adults.

[HoreTore]

Well, as your parents should have told you:

"Solve your problems with words, not violence". That applies to all aspects of society, violence should NEVER find place, anywhere. That includes "smacking" children.

[Duke John]

I believe this was also proposed in the Netherlands, but I can't recall wether it got through. However the law was supposed to enable the justice system to make a case against the serious offenders and not to prohibit parents from giving kids a "twist around the ears" (is that English?) when they are doing bad. And in that sense I think this law is good.

[Fragony]

"Solve your problems with words, not violence". That applies to all aspects of society, violence should NEVER find place, anywhere."

Awww common, nothing says 'I strongly disagree' like a well delivered punch in the face, some people just react better on that, saves time.

[Ja'chyra]

It is illegal to smack children in school, at home and of course to hit women (or the other way around) in denmark. I think that is progress - smacking isnt good for anyone. Not the parent and certainly not the child, that's abuse.

Move on, welcome to the 21st century.

Well, as your parents should have told you:

"Solve your problems with words, not violence". That applies to all aspects of society, violence should NEVER find place, anywhere. That includes "smacking" children.

Smacking children is not abuse, most of the time it doesn't even hurt it's just a way of showing an extreme displeasure and as most parents can tell you sometimes it's the only thing that will get through to a child.

I'm with the leave parenting to the parents crowd.

[BDC]

I think children seeing violence as the answer is only storing up problems for the future. But then again some will probably only respond to threats. Scary children...

Clearly the answer is water boarding.

[HoreTore]

Smacking children is not abuse, most of the time it doesn't even hurt it's just a way of showing an extreme displeasure and as most parents can tell you sometimes it's the only thing that will get through to a child.

I'm with the leave parenting to the parents crowd.

If you can't show "extreme displeasure" with words, then I feel a little sorry for you.

As for "most parents", I don't know anyone who thinks it is a good thing to hit their child. It may be a cultural thing, but at least here in scandinavia, parents hitting their children is seen as a thing of the past.

[doc_bean]

Isn't it illegal in most of the 'civilized' world already ?

[Husar]

If you can't show "extreme displeasure" with words, then I feel a little sorry for you.

As for "most parents", I don't know anyone who thinks it is a good thing to hit their child. It may be a cultural thing, but at least here in scandinavia, parents hitting their children is seen as a thing of the past.

Oh, I have seen women who do try to solve things with words, very strong words and lots of displeasure shown, and the kids respond with the same strong words and show their displeasure beore they end up annoying everybody around them for hours.
A small smack could sometimes solve the situation, do no harm and show the kid who's boss, it's not violence, it's a form of communication, like hugging or shaking hands, only with a negative connotation. Violence is when you beat your kids with full force until they turn blue, but that's not what smacking is about. Kids these days often blackmail their parents to discuss for hours because "if you smack me, I'll tell my teacher/the police", do you think that shows respect towards their parents? Not even teachers can always quiet kids using only words, and they are supposed to have learned that. Just have a look at schools in Berlin, some smacking is definitely necessary there.

[Ironside]

Oh dear. What has happened to Scandinavians.

Inspired by the Israelis.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Yes, it's incorrect (Sweden was first, in 1979), but Israel does forbid smacking and have done it for quite a while.

Does anybody consider it right to dicipline thier wife or employees with a bit of smacking?

Smacking them is not abuse, most of the time it doesn't even hurt it's just a way of showing an extreme displeasure

Awww common, nothing says 'I strongly disagree' like a well delivered punch in the face, some people just react better on that, saves time.

Yes you do need other methods to dicipline your children (if they need it) without the use of smacking, but it's certainly possible and doesn't seem to change the "failure" rate much.
So those "in need of smacking" doesn't need it to turn out fine.

[Banquo's Ghost]

Does anybody consider it right to dicipline thier wife or employers with a bit of smacking?

Moroccans and German judges, apparently.

[Kralizec]

Even if it's legal, I seriously advice you not to smack your boss Ironside

[Ironside]

Even if it's legal, I seriously advice you not to smack your boss Ironside

Mumbles something about edit function thingy

[Duke Malcolm]

Bah, Humbug! I'm all for corporal punishment, and throughout my school life have always advocated the belt, slipper, cane, or tawse and written several essays to that effect.
I believe smacking children under 3 is banned in scotland, and the degree to which once can smack a child is restricted, i.e. if bruises or welts occur due it, it is illegal. But a slap across the wrist, or a clip around the ear -- which were common in the Ducal Household -- are permitted.

[doc_bean]

Little children can be extremely vulnerable if hit the wrong way, so I can see how some of these laws make sense from a medical perspective. I'm neither pro nor contra hitting your child though, if it works for you and you don't hurt the kid it's fine by me.

I'd personally advocate burning toys, giving them nothing but brussel sprouts to eat, unplugging the tv or computer or threatening to send baby pictures to a HS mailing list before smacking though.

[Husar]

Hmm, I was talking about raising kids and teaching them disciplin, morals and how to behave, your wife and boss should know that already.
My parents stopped smacking me when I grew older because at that point they could just as well talk to me, their authority was established and I became more reasonable.
Smacking the wife is about as bad as wives smacking the husband or boyfriend, which can often be seen in movies and is surprisingly not frowned upon. It's always the fault of the man.

[drone]

I'd personally advocate burning toys, giving them nothing but brussel sprouts to eat, unplugging the tv or computer or threatening to send baby pictures to a HS mailing list before smacking though.

I got both when I misbehaved, as I got older there was less spanking/smacking and more grounding/priviledge removal. Getting spanked is easy time, not being able to watch TV or get on the computer sucked big time. Much more effective.

[Blodrast]

I
Does anybody consider it right to dicipline thier wife or employees with a bit of smacking?

The difference is obvious, the wife isn't 5 years old. You can discuss with the wife, etc. The child will not always listen, and you can certainly not explain WHY some things are good and some are wrong.
How about kids throwing a tantrum ? You know, when they never listen to what you say, and couldn't hear you anyway, since they're yelling at the top of their lungs ? Yes, you can explain to him that's rude, impolite, and it bothers the people around him, for a couple of hours, until he gets tired of screaming. Or you can give in and give him whatever he wants. OR, you can smack him a good one and raise a well-behaved child, instead of one who knows he'll always get what he wants by throwing tantrums.

As for the wife aspect, you BET a bit of smacking is desirable, if applied at the appropriate moments!