Imperial Diet V

[econ21]

Elberhard: Fredericus, you want a straight answer?

I recruited those Duke Arnolds because I am too @#$%^&!!! a general to have won without 'em!

And I lost 'em because, well, I was too @#$%^&!!! a general to keep 'em.

Satisfied? No? Well @#$%^&!!! off!

[GeneralHankerchief]

Dietrich von Dassel:

Jan, you are a lapdog. Face it. You say that "you just so happen" to share the Kaiser's perspective with most things. Do you think, perhaps, that's why he hired you in the first place??!?!

If your answer is "no," then surely the only remaining answer is because you wish to keep your position of King of Outremer and the only way you see to do so is through being... his lapdog.

Certainly it's not for merit. The Kaiser certainly didn't pick you because you were the most qualified! At the time of Salier's death and your appointment, the candidates were Zirn, Salier's well-known choice, Elberhard, the Prinz and war hero, Hans, another legendary general, and Matthias, a successful Chancellor. The only thing going for you was that you weren't expecting the appointment, thus being eternally grateful towards the man who ensured it!

How does it feel to watch everything you love go to ruin, Jan? Answer me that. How does it feel to be in Edessa witnessing your father's death? How does it feel to have been late to that battle in 1276, that battle where Salier, your eternal benefactor fell, that battle where your intervention could have been decisive? How does it feel to preside over Outremer where everyone is leaving and there are not nearly enough Crusader Counts to fill the vacancies, something that never once happened in Salier's reign? How does it feel to watch your domain go to Hell and pat yourself on the back because you feel you're qualified just because Kaiser Siegfried, in his eternal wisdom, deemed you fit to be King?

Answer me that, Jan, and don't bother using your tone of offense saying that it's not my place or that I used a low blow. Just answer me that.

[Stig]

Ansehelm:
The little Prinz says I have no grip on my House. For that I demand an apology, as he is clearly just saying something without knowing what's going on.

If he does not give an apology we can always call for an Emergency Session, I think there are enough Dukes that agree with me.

[Privateerkev]

Sir Dassel,

All you have done is highlighted your own ignorance about a great many things. I will give you one thing though, you are at least consistent. When Count Matthias and Duke Ansehelm call me a lapdog, it is because I disagree with their politics. When I agree with them, their tone shifts and they are both quite nice and accomadating. You however have maintained your opinion consistently and I respect you for it. Your wrong of course but you are consistent unlike some in here.

Yes I agree with the Kaiser on unification. Yes I agree with the Kaiser on religious re-unification and even went to the Vatican to help secure it. Happening to agree with those above you does not automatically make you a lapdog no matter how many times your political opponents repeat the assertion.

As for why he hired me? You'd have to ask him. I am starting to suspect that it had more to do with sticking his thumb in the eye of some of his political opponents here in the Diet. Thats his business. I'll just try to do the best job I can while I have it. If and when he sees fit to appoint someone else, I'll return to my old life as a Crusader Count if the new King sees fit. Otherwise, I'll just be a humble noble in Outremer serving the Lord and the Reich like I always have done. No regrets.

As usual, I disagree with your analysis of the situation. I don't see things going to ruin. My father lived a long and fruitful life. King Salier was poisoned before the battle so my arrival would have done nothing to change that. Yeah, things sometimes are difficult but the Lord grants me strength. Exactly one Crusader Count is leaving. I am not sure how "one" equals "all" like you said. Again you seem to be distorting the facts to make your case.

I am disturbed by the frequency of your distortments. Is your argument so weak on it's face that you have to twist things? Can't you have statements that stand on their own merits?

Now, do you have any more questions? I know your bitter that I disagree with you politically so you'll probably keep trying to attack me to serve your own ends. Or, you could be more constructive with your time and try to rebuild your career.

Its up to you.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Dietrich von Dassel:

You are blind, that much is evident. I don't know whether it is from power or whether it was a mental condition acquired from both. Why will you not connect the dots? Why will you not face the facts? Why do you persist that whenever we question your worth in Outremer that we simply ask the Kaiser? In case you haven't noticed, nobody is in contact with the Kaiser right now. Sorry, doesn't work. Give us a real answer.

And dare I rattle off a laundry list of the Crusaders who are no longer in Outremer under your watch? Hans left, are you forgetting about him? Jens Hummel wanted to leave, but he died before he could go back to Swabia. Zirn is leaving now and Matthias really wants to leave, that much is clear.

So once again, stop patting yourself on the back and open your eyes to the world.

[Privateerkev]

Two things,

1.) I don't have to explain my self to you. I suspect that whatever answer I give will be twisted by you anyways. I don't have to submit a yearly situation report on my worth to the Diet. Your just going to have to learn to live with that. When the Kaiser returns, ask him. Or keep making up reasons about why I should explain myself to you. You seem to be good at that. Though waiting to ask the Kaiser may prove to be a more productive use of your time, than trying to badger me, it is your life. Have fun.

2.) Correlation does not automatically equal causality. Chew on that one for awhile when you think of more evidence that Outremer is somehow in some dire straits.

[Ferret]

bah who are you to insult the King of Outremer! You have constantly insulted your betters sonce you first appeared in this Diet for no reason whatsoever. Your accusations are without evidence and you are the only one who thinks they are true, King Jan's reply was perfectly acceptable and you have no right to question it. In future I suggest you look to improving your own career instead of insulting those who have built up a career through hard work and respect for their betters. I struggle to understand how you summon the stupidity to insult these great men of our time when you are a complete nobody without even a county to call his own!

[GeneralHankerchief]

Dietrich von Dassel:

People are angry at the Kaiser, Jan. He is distant. He spends more time in Constantinople than in the Reich. And he does not listen to us. At all. People don't like that. And if we ever get out of this session alive, we'll remember his supporters. And we'll get our revenge. So if you wish to keep your oh-so-precious title, I suggest that you do defend yourself.

Here's all the evidence I need: At the start of your Kingship you had Steffen, Zirn, Hans, Elberhard, Hummel, and Bresch at your command. Now you have Elberhard and Bresch, and an extremely reluctant Steffen, and nobody new is arriving.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Dietrich von Dassel:

Ah yes, the Count issue again. I was hoping that somebody would bring that up.

Unlike you title-whores, I care little for land or recognition. What matters to me most is that I defend my country, and I will do that however I see fit, whether that means fighting as a professional soldier or "insulting my betters" as you put it.

[econ21]

Elberhard: Duke Ansehelm, there is nothing little about me, mate, there really isn't.

But I do apologise to you for saying that you had lost control of your House.

You have a Franconian as Kaiser, a brother no less. And what do you do? You disown him.

You have a Franconian as King of Outremer whom you have effectively forced into exile.

You have a second in command on the Teutonic crusade who @#$%^&!!!s off in the middle of the night with some of your select knights.

You had two Household Armies, one of which you were careless enough to lose, so now you have one.

My Duke, I do apologise. Clearly you are in complete control of your House, Duke, and of course I am a @#$%^&!!!ing idiot for ever questioning that.

[Stig]

Ansehelm:
Clearly you know not what you're talking about. 10 years ago I asked Jan to come back to Franconia, to take over Saxonia. But he's still King, so he is NO Franconian.
Helmut died a hero, don't you talk of him like that. You never knew him, you didn't travel 20 years together with him.

And I did not lose the Household Army, last time I gave orders I gave clear orders, and Peter does not disobey orders I give him.

I am in control, something is happening here and I'm not happy with it

(OOC: OOC I'm also not happy with it, read the OOC thread)

[Privateerkev]

People are angry at the Kaiser, Jan. He is distant. He spends more time in Constantinople than in the Reich. And he does not listen to us. At all. People don't like that.

Take it up with him when he gets back.

And if we ever get out of this session alive, we'll remember his supporters. And we'll get our revenge.

I'll take my chances.

So if you wish to keep your oh-so-precious title, I suggest that you do defend yourself.

It's up to the Kaiser with regards to my title. If you have an opinion on who should be King next Diet, feel free to share it with him when he returns.

Here's all the evidence I need: At the start of your Kingship you had Steffen, Zirn, Hans, Elberhard, Hummel, and Bresch at your command. Now you have Elberhard and Bresch, and an extremely reluctant Steffen, and nobody new is arriving.

Well, since you already have all the evidence you need, there is no need to gather more. Just take that mountain of evidence that you have and show it to the Kaiser when he returns. If he deems that your mountain of evidence is sufficient, he will appoint someone else. And I'll humbly return back to being either a Crusader Count or a title-less noble. No regrets.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Dietrich von Dassel:

That's my whole point. I want answers now. Religious re-unification has been carried along without the Diet's approval, apparently the Kaiser's goodwill "gift" of two provinces that were supposed to be Bavarian has failed since negotiations are still ongoing. It is all a gigantic waste of time and I want him to come back so that he may garner everyone's opinion on his actions before proceeding.

So, until he returns, I will still be calling your worthiness as King of Outremer into question. And when he does return, I intend to make it an issue, as I do with plenty of other topics that he is ignoring us on.

[econ21]

Elberhard: So, Dietrich, you think the Diet must approve of religious re-unification before it happens? Not only do you think you should be Chancellor, you also think you must be the @#$%^&!!!ing Pope?!

[FactionHeir]

I am proud to inform the assembled, that the large group of raiders who had terrorized the villages around the eastern Alps for so long have finally been scattered in a surprise attack by Ehrhart and myself.

For his valor in the battle, during which we were outnumbered 10 to 1, I hereby declare Ehrhart a knight.

Looking over to Dietrich
Von Dassel, I believe you are talking too much in the diet, that is not fitting even of a knight even. I suggest you rethink your words before you bore the diet with them and risk being cast out from the house of Swabia.

[RoadKill]

It seems that the young recruited genral, Lorenz Zirn, has entered the chambers, without anyone noticing. He has been observing the discussion for a while now.

Unlike you title-whores, I care little for land or recognition. What matters to me most is that I defend my country, and I will do that however I see fit, whether that means fighting as a professional soldier or "insulting my betters" as you put it.

I have little experience in war, if not at all, but I find your statement somewhat... weird. von Dassel, a title must be earned. And I'm sure these "title-whores" you say have done much more then just "defend their country", to earn these magnificent titles.

[TinCow]

*Lothar Steffen snickers. It appears he re-entered the Diet without being noticed.*

Tiles have to be earned? Pray tell, Lorenz, what exactly did Siegfried von Kastilien ever do to earn the Imperial throne? Well, other than getting his predecessor killed, that is...

[Cecil XIX]

So Duke Steffan, you think that nobles do not have to earn titles?

[RoadKill]

Duke Steffan, victory has to be acheived even if it means costing lives. Is that not what you want for your country?

Lorenz, stares at the Duke, but slowly relaxes and looks away, realizing his rank compared to the Duke

[Privateerkev]

Jan says to no one in particular,

Or titles are given away as sort of a "sweet sixteen" present...

[GeneralHankerchief]

Dietrich von Dassel:

So far the only criterion I see as far as title distribution goes out is if you impress one lousy person, correct me if I'm wrong.

I can hardly see sucking up to one person as "earning" a title.

[TinCow]

By all that is holy, does this Diet not recognize sarcasm and inuendo anymore? What I was saying was that despite the idealistic statements made by Lorenz, there are many men in the Reich who achieve rank and title without earning it. Indeed, I believe that was the entire point that Count von Dassel was making! Anyone who says that a man is worthy of his title simply because he could not have been awarded it otherwise is a fool. You must look beyond a man's coat of arms to see where his true value lies.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Dietrich von Dassel:

Duke Lothar, as I am sure a great many Electors in this body will point out to you, I am but a humble Sir, having failed to properly please the one person responsible for my promotion.

[Cecil XIX]

I apologize Duke Steffan, I was unsure of your meaning. Most statements are relyed to me from servants, and sarcasm can be difficult to detect from the written word.

In other news, I present the Diet with Bucharest and the Voivodeship of Wallachia.

And in more important news, I am proud to announce that my dear wife Contzel has just given birth to a son. I have given him the name Fritz, in hopes it will serve as a ward against the Poles.

[TinCow]

I stand corrected and apologize for the oversight, Dietrich. I note with irony that even your knighthood was bestowed on you by my father, instead of your own house. You have achieved much for Swabia in the defense of their lands from the French assaults, including a remarkable battle outside Caen. Be assured that even if your own Duke does not recognize your worth, there are others in this Diet who do. If ever you find yourself discontent with your lot in life, Bavaria could always use another sharp mind.

[Tamur]

*Fritz von Kastilien makes his way back into the Diet just in time for Edmund's announcement*

Indeed, what a fine name! My best to Contzel. I do hope Fritz inherits my own view of the Poles. Though I don't know how much of the child rearing I personally will do...

*Fritz trails off, smiling unsteadily, then seats himself*

[RoadKill]

Lorenz studders, to make a comment, but backs down, seeing as he has no say anymore in this arguement. It can't be helped Lorenz is young and foolish. He turns to Edmund.

Congradulations Edmund!! Finally another born into the Austrian household.

[TinCow]

Do not be embarassed, young Lorenz. Your words represent the way the Reich should be, even if it is not the way the Reich currently is. There is great value in such optimism, for it reminds us all of the path we should be walking.

[AussieGiant]

Arnold's eyes widen at Becker’s announcement of a son. With a stiff smile he shakes hands with his Count. He then rises and walks through the Austrian Chamber doors.

Bane and Grom seem to know what is about to happen and both take up positions blocking the entrance to the chamber.

From within comes a cry of pure anguish and pain. It is immediately followed by the sounds of splintering wood and bending metal.

[RoadKill]

Lorenz pushes himself tightly onto the wooden chair. His eyes stretch wide, in fear of the Dukes weird behaviour. All he could do was stare, and creeped over to Edmund.

Is the Duke not suppose to be... uhhh.. how do I put it.... happy? I always thought he wanted another general in the Austrian household. Should he not be celebrating your new child instead of anger?

Lorenz scratches his head and slowly returns back to his chair.