You ask your girlfriend to address you as mein Kaiser.
You schedule an appointment at a fertility clinic because your wife lacks "charm".
You wait for a general's speech before walking in to work.
Add to the list...
You've played MTW2 too much if...
You ask your girlfriend to address you as mein Kaiser.
You schedule an appointment at a fertility clinic because your wife lacks "charm".
You wait for a general's speech before walking in to work.
Add to the list...
If I wanted to be [jerked] around and have my intelligence insulted, I'd go back to church.
-Bill Maher
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
You've spent most of the past week rebalancing unit stats and not doing much else.
Creator of:
Lands to Conquer Gold for Medieval II: Kingdoms
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
You dream in M2TW graphics.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
You get a vague urge to yell "Charge!" as two lines of people march across the street to each other at a busy downtown zebra crossing.
Meeting new people will always have you demanding to swap map information and they will accept or you will attack.
You know that next time the doorbell rings it may very well be the pizzaboy or the MONGOLIAN HORDE!!
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
Does having a dream about being a knight returning from a crusade to find that inquisitorial troops have killed one of your friends and his entire family, and exacting brutal choppy vengeance on them count?
Fear nothing except in the certainty that you are your enemy's begetter and its only hope of healing. For everything that does evil is in pain.
-The Maestro Sartori, Imajica by Clive Barker
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When you answer the door after being interupted in the middle of your campaign mumbling,"Knife, poison, or strangulation? It's a tough decision. Would you like him to suffer my Lord?"
"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." *Jim Elliot*
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
when you spend your working day looking at forums about a game and not even playing it??
threating to assassinate the local mormans for trying to convert people on your land?
The true test of a man is not at his great moment, but at his weakest point. -me
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When you THINK in M2TW graphics while being conscious and awake! :dizzy2: (the shadows of the leaves of a tree outside made me think of the graphic shadows of troop movement when zoomed in through the grass, looked like it exactly).Originally Posted by Grimmy
When you see a piece of land outside with lots of grass and nature objects, you're thinking of possible battle situations, battle tactics to use.
When you see a mouse or rat in a building you think the place is infected with the plague.
When you imagine a green marked field around you, thinking that's the only places you can get to within 2 years (or 1 or half a year depending on your time scale :P).
When you imagine a yellow marked field around somebody else.
When you imagine to see your environment from an overview where you see the trees swinging like heck.
When you are considering taking horse-riding lessons.
When you are taking a spear/sword and armor with you to said horse-riding lessons.
When somebody tells you that you have no more time to finish a project, you suggest using MedManager to change the time scale of your savegame.
When you're starting to think there are only two seasons a year: summer and winter.
Emotion, passions, and desires are, thus peace is not.
Emotion: you have it or it has you.
---
Pay heed to my story named The Thief in the Mead Hall.No.
---
Check out some of my music.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When you think you age half a year for every two years that passes ¬_¬
Last edited by Quickening; 12-14-2006 at 02:05.
Harbour you unclean thoughts
Add me to X-Fire: quickening666
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When you hope for an Inquisitor to come to work - just to fry your boss..
"My IQ test came back. Thankfully it was negative"
Been to:
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When driving your car you find yourself yelling: "Fly like the wind!"
When a tourist asks map information from you, you demand ceasefire and trade rights in exchange.
Lional of Cornwall
proud member of the Round Table Knights
___________________________________
Death before dishonour.
"If you wish to weaken the enemy's sword, move first, fly in and cut!" - Ueshiba Morihei O-Sensei
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
I do this all the time! I used to think I was the only one who did this too...
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
...if while watching a history documentary or history movie with your girlfriend you tend to yell "The flanks, watch the flanks!!!"
...if you are afraid that the girl you date will give you the "wife is a wretch" trait and you'll lose popularity.
...if you can't look at map of Europe without wondering about those strange borders.
...if you are mad at your girlfriend (Scottish) because her ancestors broke their alliance with you.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
LOL, I am doing that NOW!!! Love being a gubbmint employee!!
Cap badge of the Queens Royal Lancers
The Death or Glory Boys
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
...you think about asking one of your friends to go to Rome and give the Pope your map informations.
...yousend a letter to the Vatican and ask the Pope to call a crusade on Tunis.
...you send your 16 year old daughter to your neighbour with the proposal of marriage and an alliance.
...you ask your local priest on sunday what his piety-rating is.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
My priests rating was 6, but that darn choir boy caused it to drop....you ask your local priest on sunday what his piety-rating is.
Wine is a bit different, as I am sure even kids will like it.
"Hilary Clinton is the devil"BigTex
~Texas proverb
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
... when you look at game screenshots you try to close the scrolls by clicking the bottom corner button or hover your mouse over the units to see their status.
(this one's for real, it happens to me and from what I've read on some threads, to others too)
...when you watch a battle scene in a historical movie you leave in disgust after 5 minutes mumbling things like "I would've done better" or "stupid AI".
...when you watch a battle scene in a historical movie for more than 5 minutes, everyone else leaves annoyed by your constant mumbling.
...you don't go shopping for new clothes, you go for upgrading your armour - and become disoriented when you can't find the master armourer.
...when you ask for a few days off from work, your boss asks "What's up, the patch is out ?". You also might plan your holidays around the release dates.
...you can't play any other strategy game anymore except for TW
(this one's not funny, it's just the truth)
...whenever you need to take a boat trip, you become worried about pirates
...you had a bad fight/argument with your father, and just miss the M1TW ability to assasinate your own faction leader to force succesion.
"That's what we need : someone who'll strike the most brutal blow possible, with perfect aim and with no regard for consequences. Total War."
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When you annoy your wife by telling her that the computer animations of battle on the history channel are from your total war game evry time it happens.
Cap badge of the Queens Royal Lancers
The Death or Glory Boys
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
1-Drinking loads and bragging to your mates that you have a +10% drinking trait.
2-Work out a route to the exit of the Bar, with an imaginary Very wavey Green Line, using multiple variations.
3-After, when leaving the bar, slur to a passing woman that you think she is an ugly princess.
4-Next, after refusal to a club, you charge at the club bouncer and try to flip him in a final finishing move.
5-When, after being beaten up by said bouncer, shake a stick at a Police Horse (can't attack it as a Dismounted Knight) and start shouting you are 'Man of the Hour!!' to the Police who are now wrestling you into the van.
6-En-route to the Police station, demand to be Released or at best, Ransomed, instead of Execution so that you can go to the nearest Coaching House. (Fnarrr Fnarrr!)
7-When being interned for a police cell (Reminding yourself that the Policeman is NOT an Inquisitor), explain that you are a faction heir and have a piety rating of +6. Command a Great Army and am a student of the assassins' guild (LEAVE OUT THE DRINKING TRAIT) and live in the Castle at Nottingham.
8-On release, Shout that because of this you have waisted 2 years to the policeman and now aged 1 year. Repeat part 7.
9-On release, Go back to Nottingham Castle (Semi detached house in Purfleet)
10-Plan next offensive (or night out)
Last edited by JFC; 12-14-2006 at 14:48.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
You go to your dad and demand that he passes on his retinue/ancillaries to you before he dies...
Your friends start to refer to you as "that Total War guy"...
You try to marry your sister to your friends to increase their loyalty...
"Distracting a politician from governing is like distracting a bear from eating your baby." - PJ O'Rourke
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When walking down the street with friends and you shout charge but the damn horn doesn't sound and you know the guys behind you will be standing around looking defensive ...
When your praying for a 'Adulterer' Ancilery ... and hoping she doesn't turn out to be a Princess with a father who has a Master Smith!
When your waiting to debunk the Pagan Magician or invite him to a kids party ...
When you talk about how you would have done better than the 'Coalition of the Willing' in your crusade to Bagdad ...
When just because your English you hate the Scottish and the French ... OK this ones not specific to a TW fan.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When on your cousin's 16th birthday you tell him he has come of age.
You even propose to install him in a city as a governor.
When you are checking forums everyday as many times as possible to see if the patch is already out.
When you are using the TW language style in everyday conversations and quoting generals' speeches when fitting.
When seeing a computer mouse you think the place is infected with the plague.
To tell your worst enemy after pulling off a nasty move that your relations are abysmal.
When your girlfriend tells you you're going on vacation to a far country across the sea you reply saying it'll take too long by boat thinking planes don't exist.
When you hear somebody mention a country not in M2TW you ask what kind of faction it is. "Is it unlockable?"
Emotion, passions, and desires are, thus peace is not.
Emotion: you have it or it has you.
---
Pay heed to my story named The Thief in the Mead Hall.No.
---
Check out some of my music.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
...You start moving around the office a few steps at a time, stopping in between to make sure you're not about to get tangled up in someone else's Zone of Control.
...When your son turns 16, you give him a horse and tell him to spend the next two years patrolling the back yard for bandits and to build a watchtower out by the juniper bushes.
...You by a pet rat and train him to sleep under your bed as a distraction for poisonous snakes.
You can't make an omelette without killing a few people.
- Mr. Croup, Neverwhere
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
When you deny that anywhere out of the M2TW map radius exists.
When you insist upon magical green arrows that let you travel from Spain to Africa by foot.
When a salesman comes to your door you mumble 'Oh no. It's that Inquisitor again. I will just use my +10 dread and piety ratin to shrug him off!'
Down with the enemies of Byzantium!
The Bartix thread is good for your health!
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
O.K. I'll take the cheap one:
When you're confused and trying to figure out why hovering your mouse over unit cards isn't revealing any unit info and then realize its because you're looking at a screen shot.
You fail a world history exam because you confused in game events with historical occurences.
Last edited by Kraggenmor; 12-14-2006 at 17:07.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
...You freeze when you see a ladder.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
...a mysterious bloke turns up on your doorstep mumbling about Thor and Odin and absolutely will not leave your side.
...you suddenly realise that the toothpick you're using is a splinter of the True Cross.
...you ever find yourself becoming Exhausted because of all the late nights.
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
you know too much about M2TW
you post too little on the forums (as time is better spent playing)
you start trying out those new combat animations in the privacy of your room
you start shouting charge when you force yourself to run faster
you wonder what traits you and others would have
you actually have to force yourself to abstain or fail college due to not getting any work done
Want gunpowder, mongols, and timurids to appear when YOU do?
Playing on a different timescale and never get to see the new world or just wanting to change your timescale?
Click here to read the solution
Annoyed at laggy battles? Check this thread out for your performance needs
Got low fps during siege battles in particular? This tutorial is for you
Want to play M2TW as a Vanilla experience minus many annoying bugs? Get VanillaMod Visit the forum Readme
Need improved and faster 2H animations? Download this! (included in VanillaMod 0.93)
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
...you start hating the Danes in real life because they keep breaking alliances and backstabbing you in your campaigns!!!
Re: You've played MTW2 too much if...
You never ever ride a horse under a bridge again.
You always enter a room, slamming the door open so hard it bounces against the wall.
You never walk by barrels without having a look at them first.
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