The pause button is essential to sanity -- how else can you find the time to make another cup of coffee whilst there are still 10,000 enemy soldiers left to kill
And this:
really bugs me. When things get crowded it's almost impossible to 'pick up' the unit you want, or accidentally point it at the wrong target because there's a stray man from another enemy unit in the midst of the one you wish to target....trying to click on a moving target
Most of the other 'sins' I tend to role-play rather than have fixed rules. If my general dies, for instance, the prisoners get it in the neck, but generally I only massacre prisoners if I have more than 1,000 of them. This means the general goes straight to 'butcher' without passing 'scant mercy' in the VnVs after the battle...
As for the pillaging, I generally prefer to leave provinces as intact as I find them, if I intend to keep the province immediately, but there are times when I'm up against a big enemy faction, I might launch a chevauchee into a vulnerbale province which I can't hope to hold - preferably forcing the AI to retreat completely (best chance is to overwhelm their king's army...) then I can trash the province before returning to my secure borders. However, even then it's a role-played thing for when I'm in a tough spot. And I always have the rule that I NEVER trash the economic infrastructure - so farms, merchants and mines are spared the torch.
Setting up the re-inforcement grid is also not a sin in my book - if a big army goes into battle it will often be divided into different columns or battles before meeting the enemy, so it's effectively a way to designate your van, main battle, reserves, and rearguard. Interestingly, do you realise that in a battle where you have allies, you can also order the allies' reinforcement grid when their army is big enough? It can be a useful way to balance out your overall forces, if say you are short of cavalry, you can make your ally put in a first wave that has all of his cavalry deployed etc. I'd been playing for years before I discovered this can be done! (I also use this to keep his missiles out of the way if I fear he'll just shoot into the melee and kill as many of my men as the enemy's...)
I don't disband much, usually just broken mercenary units that have become too small to be of use, or when a general has become so vice-ridden he is no longer fit to serve the king (cracked-brained cowards who are fond of retreating etc...)
And of course that gives away that I sometimes use mercenaries, but only in extremis. In vanilla I might sometimes snaffle up any advance gunpowder units that crop up, as they come in very useful against the Mongols, especially for bridge battles. And talking of bridge battles, someone mentioned that the AI never attacks over the second bridge when available - yet it does somehow manage to defend a second bridge.... why is it blind in attack, but smarter in defence???
And saving between battles... that for me is purely a practical issue - I've tried it, but found more times than not it either causes me a CTD or the save is corrupted when it doesn't CTD, so I only do a quick-save at the end of the turn, and a full save before launching a war at a new enemy.
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