Most historians are now leaning towards alternative arguments regarding Byzantium's alleged military downfall in the eleventh century - particularly John Haldon - and the general consensus now indeed is that Manzikert was not a disastrous defeat in military terms. That the situation was not recovered had more to do with the ineffective Byzantine administration at that point. Attaleiates talks of the thematic troops going to the dogs, and its clear the army in general was in a rather shabby state, not helped at all by largely unable leadership, particularly from the top. Byzantium's 'Golden Age' from 959-1025 was largely attributable to it being ruled by superb commanders - Phokas, Tzimiskes and Basil II - who effectively ran a military state. With the spate of 'civilian emperors' that followed, who blew most of Basil's treasury and dismantled the Iberian themata, the long-term effect was always going to be disastrous. True the professionalization of the army began under Phokas - more mercenaries and a progressive doing away with thematic soldiers - but this would have worked as long as a militarily capable, strong emperor was in charge. George Maniakes and Isaac Komnenos probably presented the best chance for the Empire to return to former glories, but it was not to be. I think Romanos IV was very brave and was royally shafted by the Doukai.
Stephen Asen it is never said that Basil II hated women. Like Nikephoros Phokas it seems he was rather bookish and had little time for such distractions, instead preferring government and war, but to blame him as the chief perpertrator of the misfortunes of the 11th century, for not having an heir, is, I feel, rather harsh. Angold also blamed Basil and there are not many who subscribe to his theory.
And with the loss of Anatolia, we should not forget that Byzantium lost much of its best manpower, should they have even tried to rejuvenate the theme system.
Just try not to believe most of what Psellos says, since he was strongly aligned with the Doukai.
As far as sources go, Attaleiates is the best on Manzikert, but he's not available in English translation (I do however have the Manzikert passages translated). Psellos and Skylitzes Continuatus are also of some use. I know a recent book came out - Turkish Myth and Muslim Symbol: The Battle of Manzikert - which may be useful to you.
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