EB Demotivators

[Ibn-Khaldun]

https://i259.photobucket.com/albums/hh311/ibnkhaldun/TW%20games/eb_demotiv2.jpg

[Lazy O]

How can a bridge battle pollute a sea?

[Ibn-Khaldun]

The battle was fought on a river crossing in Nile delta. What you see in the distance is the Mediterranean and where does all the dead bodies go? That is right.. the Mediterranean.

[ziegenpeter]

Funny.
But bridges were invented even before 272. And battles too.

[Prussian to the Iron]

Funny.
But bridges were invented even before 272. And battles too.

http://arthropoda.southernfriedscience.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/facepalm.jpg

[Populus Romanus]

hahahahahah!

[Captain Jazzy]

https://img29.imageshack.us/img29/5512/botae.png (https://img29.imageshack.us/i/botae.png/)

Not strictly a demotivator but anyway...

[antisocialmunky]

That's a pretty good one.

[vartan]

https://i.imgur.com/tO4P5.jpg

[Rahwana]

https://i.imgur.com/tO4P5.jpg

not sometimes, OFTEN (considering Hayasdan's crappy rooster that forces you to use everything in numbers to overcome argyraspidai spam)

[CashMunny]

Nah, Hayasdan's roster is top notch. Cheap, deadly, and fast light units, and juggernauts for elites. Not sure what you're talking about man. Caucasian Archers kill most anything except phalangites in droves, and even phalangites die when they're not facing the archers, plus Caucasian Spearmen beat pantodapoi, and Armenian Spearmen can hold phalanx units for a cavalry flanking maneuver, their cavalry is almost as good as Pahlava's, and on par with Baktria's if not superior to theirs. They have access to Skythian and Hellenic units, they are great in the terrian they're fighting in, and Arche Seleukeia has no idea how to form an army that actually functions well anyways. Argyraspidai spam gets beat pretty easily by Cataphract Horse Archer spam, but if you don't have the cash for that, Skythian Riders and Armenian Spearmen/Noble Infantry if you can afford them will take them out handily as long as you have a bodyguard unit to charge the rear of the more stubborn units. Keep your Infantry standing on a hill or whatever picking their noses while your riders circle the phalangites and make them exhausted. Then bring in the spearmen and watch the blood splatter. Exhausted Argyraspidai aren't much more powerful than fresh Armenian Spearmen, and they'll get slaughtered by fresh Nobles, not to mention they should be at least at 2/3 strength, probably more like half strength, from arrow fire unless you didn't circle behind them. I'd hedge my bets on 200 well led, well rested (probably quite experienced as well) Armenian Spearmen over 150-ish hapless Argyraspidai who've been running around for an hour in full battle attire in terrain they're not suited for, in a foreign land, most of the time without a proper general leading them.

[Walle]

Agreed CashMunny. Hayasdan, and its roster, kicks seleucid ass!

[Brave Brave Sir Robin]

I too have a soft spot for Armenian Spearmen. Not sure why but I just love them.

[jirisys]

:laugh4:

https://img7.imageshack.us/img7/4896/screen26demot.jpg

~Jirisys (The downside of HAs :furious3: :laugh4:)

[Populus Romanus]

LOL! And an early congats for your 500th post.

[Maeran]

You really must learn to keep some distance with your HAs. That's a pretty high rate.

Reminds me of a scene in Ronin.

[Molinaargh]

https://i.imgur.com/RCf5t.jpg

[Arthur, king of the Britons]

:laugh4:

[Populus Romanus]

https://i.imgur.com/RCf5t.jpg

I'm glad this did not happen in the AAR!

[Paltmull]

Keeping the thread alive with a couple of awful demotivators :tongue3:

https://i571.photobucket.com/albums/ss154/paltmull/ebdemotivator_terrain.jpg

https://i571.photobucket.com/albums/ss154/paltmull/ebdemotivator_carsickness.jpg

https://i571.photobucket.com/albums/ss154/paltmull/ebdemotivator_clever.jpg

[vollorix]

Cool, scrolling around the battlefield makes me sometimes really sick due to the kamera angle i get in such a terrain ^^

[Paltmull]

Lol! ^^

[CashMunny]

My mom actually gets the same way, if I have to show her how to do something on the computer and I scroll too fast, she starts getting nauseous and I have to stop. That would be a terrible problem for an avid PC gamer like myself, so I am glad I didn't inherit it.

[ziegenpeter]

https://img545.imageshack.us/img545/8130/continuinganoldeuropaba.jpg

[Populus Romanus]

wut?

[The Celtic Viking]

https://img541.imageshack.us/img541/9476/linesq.jpg

[Brennus]

https://img541.imageshack.us/img541/9476/linesq.jpg

Thats a very cool screenshot. You could make a nice AAR with that.

[Skullheadhq]

let me guess, a severely depleted unit that has only officers left?

[The Celtic Viking]

IIRC, it was a 2 men bataroas unit that was assigned as the captain's unit in the defence of Bratosporios.


Thats a very cool screenshot. You could make a nice AAR with that.

Thank you. Unfortunately, they all died in that battle, so it'd be a rather short one. :laugh4:

[Alrik]

https://img141.imageshack.us/img141/3610/demotivatorebconstipati.jpg (https://img141.imageshack.us/i/demotivatorebconstipati.jpg/)

[Walle]

:laugh4:I laughed my arse off at the "constipation" one!:laugh4:

[Duguntz]

https://img141.imageshack.us/img141/3610/demotivatorebconstipati.jpg (https://img141.imageshack.us/i/demotivatorebconstipati.jpg/)

EPIC!!! This one will be in the "annals" of the demotivators!

[Fluvius Camillus]

LOL!!! Great!!!

~Fluvius

[Alrik]

:laugh4:I laughed my arse off at the "constipation" one!:laugh4:

;)


EPIC!!! This one will be in the "annals" of the demotivators!

*Bam-dish*

I see I'm not the only one fond of play on words and puns ^^

@Fluvius Camillus: Thanks! ;)

[Cute Wolf]

LOL! Nice!

[Lazy O]

Nice one

[Populus Romanus]

Brilliant!

[lolpah]

One of the funniest in the whole thread! :laugh4:

[Alrik]

https://img641.imageshack.us/img641/6214/ebwitchdemotivator.jpg (https://img641.imageshack.us/i/ebwitchdemotivator.jpg/)
May we burn her?

Thanks guys ;)

[jirisys]

https://img641.imageshack.us/img641/6214/ebwitchdemotivator.jpg (https://img641.imageshack.us/i/ebwitchdemotivator.jpg/)
May we burn her?

Thanks guys ;)

a-aight. You get better though.

~Jirisys ()

[Lazy O]

Wait, How the hell does having a witch around increase chance of having children 0.o

[Prussian to the Iron]

Where's the Papal States Inquisitors when you need 'em?

[Populus Romanus]

Wait, How the hell does having a witch around increase chance of having children 0.o

Hehe...:laugh4:

[Duguntz]

Wait, How the hell does having a witch around increase chance of having children 0.o

That depends how looks like the witch :gorgeous: :))

[jirisys]

Where's the Papal States Inquisitors when you need 'em?

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!!

https://img504.imageshack.us/img504/6594/spanishinquisitionblogpue8.jpg

~Jirisys (You didn't expect that? Did you now? :laugh4:)

[Lazy O]

I expected it

[Populus Romanus]

I expected it

Blasphemer! Heretic! Burn him!

[Arthur, king of the Britons]

Our chief weapon is surprise...surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Our *four*...no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again.

[The Inquisition exits]

[Cute Wolf]

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!!!

https://img504.imageshack.us/img504/6594/spanishinquisitionblogpue8.jpg

~Jirisys (You didn't expect that? Did you now? :laugh4:)

now, I've prepared the stakes for burning those pagans! prepare the torture rack!

[Duguntz]

Every pagan burned = 10 points! who's gonna win? (By the way, watch out Wolfy! Calvinist were considered Heretics by the inquisition... well, in face, everyone who wasn't catholic or orthodox were good for the stake (or fire!), so... RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!)

[Cute Wolf]

Every pagan burned = 10 points! who's gonna win? (By the way, watch out Wolfy! Calvinist were considered Heretics by the inquisition... well, in face, everyone who wasn't catholic or orthodox were good for the stake (or fire!), so... RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!)

well, at least we can thrown some anababtists so we can burn them together as historically happened when Zwingli made peace :clown:

duh, this demot thread is gonna roll the wrong way... better we've stop here :grin:

~ opens up EB and hope something stupid happenes

[Populus Romanus]

Every pagan burned = 10 points! who's gonna win? (By the way, watch out Wolfy! Calvinist were considered Heretics by the inquisition... well, in face, everyone who wasn't catholic or orthodox were good for the stake (or fire!), so... RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!)

I already have about 500 points if you count ants as pagans.

[Satyros]

https://img401.imageshack.us/img401/9138/aialzheimer.jpg

Excellent ! :laugh4:

Satyros

[Duguntz]

I already have about 500 points if you count ants as pagans.

Ants are the scourge of this lands. Burn, BUUUUURN!. Remember the glorious crusade and shout GOD WANTS IT

[Lazy O]

Stop the offtopic nesssss

[Paltmull]

https://i571.photobucket.com/albums/ss154/paltmull/EBdemAKbar3.jpg

[Ca Putt]

eventho we had one of these already, this, due to the fact that he is trapped, Is REALLY Cool!

thumbs up

[panten]

And don't disregard the fact that he is actually trapped by the "Empire" - thumbs up indeed

[Prussian to the Iron]

And don't disregard the fact that he is actually trapped by the "Empire" - thumbs up indeed

I was literally about to say that!

And I agree with the two posts above: Thumbs up, and I tip my hat to you for such a funny Demot.

[Arthur, king of the Britons]

Haha, that demotivator is simply wonderful!

[Paltmull]

Thanks, everyone!

[vartan]

He should escape using the invisible escape hatches invented by Carthaginians of ages past.

[Paltmull]

No, he should concentrate all fire on that Quinquereme.

[jirisys]

Yes, I said CLOSER, get us as close as you can to those triremes and engage them at point-blank range!
We won't last long against those triremes!
We will last longer than we would against that quinquireme! And we might take a few of them with us!

~Jirisys ()

[Ibrahim]

Every pagan burned = 10 points! who's gonna win? (By the way, watch out Wolfy! Calvinist were considered Heretics by the inquisition... well, in face, everyone who wasn't catholic or orthodox were good for the stake (or fire!), so... RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!)


oh great! now I know where Dr. Pagan went! Richard had me search half the interwebs for this guy, so I can start redoing on the plates of saxon military uniforms from the Seven years war... so yeah, brilliant ******, you just killed the guy! :clown:

jk...jk...though I'm really looking for the man, a certain Dr. Pagan, for the promised material on the saxon army.

[Prussian to the Iron]

Nice to know I'm not the only Star Wars nerd playing EB.

[The_Blacksmith]

Nice to know I'm not the only Star Wars nerd playing EB.

oh you are so not alone :D

[Duguntz]

Nice to know I'm not the only Star Wars nerd playing EB.

Definitly not!

[Fluvius Camillus]

Let's fire it up again!

https://i594.photobucket.com/albums/tt22/Fluvius_Camillus/Qart.jpg

~Fluvius

[XSamatan]

Nice catch!

[The_Blacksmith]

Oh snap... thats just pure win....

[Populus Romanus]

If you look at the text speech box, the guy is saying "accept this as a gift to solidify our friendship". So it is not that fail after all. Hilarious all the same!

[Cute Wolf]

maybe that was on assumption you've agreed to provide Hadrusbal with some nice German slave girls for the nest 2 seasons instead of merely 150 minai (that goes on booze and extra things)

[moonburn]

so fluvius when americans invest billions in places like india or mexico for almost absolutely no return it´s a fail or is it buying friendship/peace of mind ?

it seemed a good deal if the carthies can buy your suport against the romans for so litle and in mtw2 now that we can see where we stand with other factions those kind of deals do make alot of sence

[Duguntz]

so fluvius when americans invest billions in places like india or mexico for almost absolutely no return it´s a fail or is it buying friendship/peace of mind ?

it seemed a good deal if the carthies can buy your suport against the romans for so litle and in mtw2 now that we can see where we stand with other factions those kind of deals do make alot of sence

It's defitinively a fail from America's part!

[athanaric]

Let's fire it up again!

[...]

~Fluvius
I get that all the time in early campaign. These "investments" can seriously help you when you're a Barbarian or Nomad player and piss poor during the first twenty turns.

[NikosMaximilian]

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v211/Nikov/EBDemotcomplete.jpg?t=1301721567

[The_Blacksmith]

Hahahahahhaha captain Python?!! Hahaha

[jirisys]

None*

:wink:

~Jirisys ()

[Ca Putt]

Woah, I didn't expect Captain Python!

[N0V0NEU]

Once I've met Captain Conan leading a smaller Aedui force and his bodyguards were strong sexy Gaesatae-s :D

[N0V0NEU]

Oh by the way, im new to the forum, so let me say a big "Hi!" to everyone!:beam::beam::beam:

[vartan]

Oh by the way, im new to the forum, so let me say a big "Hi!" to everyone!:beam::beam::beam:
Beware the double-post. It has a certain stigma attached to it, especially on these fora.

[The Celtic Viking]

Perhaps I can resuscitate this thread with a new demotivator.

https://img600.imageshack.us/img600/7757/epicfail2u.jpg

[The_Blacksmith]

Hahaha... ohh snap xD

[Ca Putt]

XD how epic, that's probably why I rarely use elephantes. how many enemies were left btw? I'd really like to see that statistic^^

[Tanit]

I had a general, conquerer of all Spain, killed in the last siege by one of his own elephants dying and falling on him.

[The Celtic Viking]

XD how epic, that's probably why I rarely use elephantes. how many enemies were left btw? I'd really like to see that statistic^^

Elephants are awesome; I use them whenever I can get them and have enough cash. Here they were used by the AI, though, which should explain much of the fail. ~;)

Unfortunately, two of the elephants died right after I took this picture: my Lusotannan general's javelins had been a little too effective. The third one survived longer and appeared to get stuck right in the middle of the gate, though, so it took out a fair amount more before joining its fallen friends. The biggest effect it had though I think was creating enough chaos and confusion to slow them down enough so that my reinforcements could make it into the city and save the day.

Quite an entertaining battle, I must say.

[jirisys]

Funny how you said resuscitation on easter.

:inquisitive:

~Jirisys ()

[Ca Putt]

haha that indeed does explain it^^ tho at first glance I thought it was this typical kind of battle where the enemy has like one FM in the city and you attack him with your royal army but as the AI FM has like 10 stars autoresolve would kill off most of your precious import-troops thus you have to fight it out^^ - in these battles the FM often remains at the town sqare waiting for his inevitable demise. good work with those javs there, it's always fun to see how a unit of free elephants plows through the enemy^^

[Brave Brave Sir Robin]

Funny how you said resuscitation on easter.

:inquisitive:

~Jirisys ()

'Twould be resurrection, not resuscitation.:angel:

[The Spartathenian of Corinth]

These are hysterical, especially the one about the dude and his horse.

[Rahwana]

Funny how you said resuscitation on easter.

:inquisitive:

~Jirisys ()

Just honour what other people believe, can you?
I'd said we can't prove that story is wrong, even if it doesn't make much sense in human mind. For Christians, Jesus die to save their souls. Yeah, the saviour is Jesus, not Flying Sphagetti Monster.

~ Rahwana (Haleluyah!)

[The Celtic Viking]

For Christians, Jesus die to save their souls. Yeah, the saviour is Jesus, not Flying Sphagetti Monster.

Yes, but for muslims, he did not, so just honour what other people believe, can you?

[Arthur, king of the Britons]

Being registered as a Christian in Indonesia grants 'pork-eating and alcohol-drinking rights', and that's about as far Sonic's christian fervour goes. :wink:


He's a member of the Atheist fan-club last time I checked. :book:

[Duguntz]

Just honour what other people believe, can you?
I'd said we can't prove that story is wrong, even if it doesn't make much sense in human mind. For Christians, Jesus die to save their souls. Yeah, the saviour is Jesus, not Flying Sphagetti Monster.

~ Rahwana (Haleluyah!)

Not agree... AT ALL! You can respect other's believes, but to honor them is an other thing! to honor someone elses beleive would be to deny your own! so... let's keep to respect!

[TheLastDays]

Maybe, just maybe, that's the wrong thread for this discussion... we should honor the forum rules ;)

[Duguntz]

Maybe, just maybe, that's the wrong thread for this discussion... we should honor the forum rules ;)

:)) that's a fact of biblical proportions! Let's stop before it's gets ugly :)

[Cute Wolf]

this thread needs some bump, too bad, there's too many gaesatae, tindanotae, and uirodusios demotivators.... DOH

BUMP btw

[jirisys]

Elephants are awesome; I use them whenever I can get them and have enough cash. Here they were used by the AI, though, which should explain much of the fail. ~;)

Unfortunately, two of the elephants died right after I took this picture: my Lusotannan general's javelins had been a little too effective. The third one survived longer and appeared to get stuck right in the middle of the gate, though, so it took out a fair amount more before joining its fallen friends. The biggest effect it had though I think was creating enough chaos and confusion to slow them down enough so that my reinforcements could make it into the city and save the day.

Quite an entertaining battle, I must say.

Pretty realistic too. Poor Pyrrhos learned that at Beneventum.

~Jirisys ()

[Servilius Novus]

This is just plain bad, but am I the only one...?

5629

(Description: Alternative EB loading screen - by Cpt. Obvious)

[vartan]

Haha! I dig it!

[Mouzafphaerre]

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EB demotivators... Well, let's face it, RTW itself comes first but I won't open that can of worms. Other than that the dangerous epidemic I seem to have caught called life, university (and struggles therewith), other games (no, not plural, simply the devil called LOTRO) etc. etc.
​