Tips on how to attract a girl

[edyzmedieval]

Title explains everything ~D

Everyone here, post your tips. Some of us are in need of them(not me!!!), so It would be a great thing.

And mods, if it is active enough, make it a sticky please. ~:)

[Samurai Waki]

Give her a good long look right in her eyes and say "How about another round of beer?" ~D

[Somebody Else]

Money, status and power.

[Brutus]

Humhum

*cough*

"How YOU doin'?"

[Taurus]

Humhum

*cough*

"How YOU doin'?"

lol mate ~:cheers: Joey!

[Franconicus]

Money, status and power.
Completely wrong. She must have pity on you. Girls love birds with broken wings ~;)

And Teddies, of course! ~:cool:

[Fragony]

Bring another specimen.

[Drisos]

~:eek:

Good idea but I'm afraid I cannot be of help for people here. :embarassed:

*****

I have been in love with the same girl for 1,5 year now, she was in my class, but not anymore. Anyway, she knew it and I tried everything to make her give me a chance to prove I was the one. But while me and some others (me included makes it 5 in total ~D ) did this, she kept 'searching' for a boyfriend, while she had 5 people who wanted to, she kept searching! GAH! girls... you are never good enough for them, they say you're nice but in fact they always keep hoping some bad-singing celebrity will be theirs. GAH again! I would have done anything for that girl! If I could get every female on the world I would still pick her, but I just wasn't good enough...

*****

sorry for going so off topic. I am trying to forget her by playing STW and being around here but it's hard. deep down I still hope...-you know-...

so I can't be of help, I'm no good at this. :embarassed:

[rasoforos]

Spend a whole hour talking to her about Total war, pay special attention to make sure she understands how the macedonian phallanx worked and about how bowmen used to be much stronger in Shogun than in Medieval. Also tell her about that time when you defeated a whole bunch of Egyptians by only using 2 units of cavaly and 4 units of peasants ( make sure you use the bottles and glasses,forks,plates around the bar/restaurant/cafee table to re-enact your battle tactic as accurately as possible )

If you run out of words dont worry. You can always talk about sports, your ex girlfriend, politics and of course that skin rash you got last month and it still itches...

Then all girls can be mine! MIIINE! MUHAHAHAHHA! :charge:

[R'as al Ghul]

Tips on how to attract a girl
Ignore her.

Seriously it will make her curious why on earth you
are not interested in her.
Apart from that, I second everything rasoforos said.
After all, girls really like to talk about warfare, don't they?
~;)

[Voigtkampf]

Every time I hear this question, I crack up. Girls aren't quite as Superficial as us guys when it comes to judging the opposite sex.

Not quite as; substantially more. ~D

Never walk into the trap of thinking that girls are somehow more profound then boys. They are, in matter a fact, much worse.

They just pretend better! :kiss2:

As for the tips

My one and only pickup line:

I drive down the street, wave a stack of twenties at any woman on any street corner:

“HEY!!!” *wave money*

“GET IN!!! I’M NOT A COP!!!”

It works. :thumbsup:

[The Stranger]

be confident and funny but not too much cuz she'll think your arrogant. let it come to you but steer it behind the scenes. be nice but not slimey. show her your emotions.

[Lazul]

talk about Alexander the great and compare him to Hannibal and then move on to Napoleon while just giving Ceaser a few credits.... they will love you. :dizzy2:

not really... find something you have in common and talk about it, and when ever you can, be funny or give her compliments... works for me :bow:

or play it safe, tell her: "Wonna come home ot my place and have sex and eat popcorn?"
Then she says: "no"
And you look all offended: "What!? you dont like popcorn?"
then she will probably slap you haha

[Taffy_is_a_Taff]

Not acting like a jerk is always a good start.
Somehow being down on your luck (but not being a whiney baby) can get a good sympathy reaction.

However, as has been previously noted: women are nuts. So these suggestions may work on some but fail pathetically on others.

EDIT: Do not attempt anything with women when you are drunk. Just don't, if it works you may regret it and if it doesn't there's a fair chance you'll have made a complete tit out of yourself.

EDIT2: Common interests, find out what she likes and get into it yourself. It's amazing how interesting you can find absolute crap when you want in the pants of one of its devotees.

[Ianofsmeg16]

It all well and dandy posting in this and thank god for your advice but it is all, in fact, useless. Unless your and a tall, muscle-bound, god-like hero character who can sing and loves to talk about "where the relationship is heading (oh me all the way....it helps to tell her you are a crucial part of a conspiracy to bring about the end of the so called frog) then you really aint getting anywhere....or that maybe only girls at MY school.
EDIT: It also helps if you are in a band......unless its a Slipknot tribut band...Metallica would do

[The Wizard]

Do as the Brabantines do. Club 'em over the head and drag 'em back to your lair.

Oh, and ian: No. All you need to do is seem confident (seem; you can be a nervous wreck beneath the vernish, but just seem to be confident!) and talk fast. Be funny and audacious. Done. ~;)

[Taffy_is_a_Taff]

musicians: Ian of Smeg is spot on about musicians. Nothing else applies, if you are a musician you will get girls.

Sure playing something like the cello may not get you girls in high school but it will afterwards.

Musicians are bastards.

[The Wizard]

Depends. What girls do you get? Hoes if your an MC (and a good one at that, with a good producer), goths (~:eek:) if you play metal etc, punks... Naw. I'd rather be an RnB crooner. Or just me. Yeah, I'll settle for that. ~D

[Steppe Merc]

My friends are in a band, they all have the hottest girlfriends ever... Though the lead guitarist's cousin is with the rythym guitarst, which I imagine is wierd.
Well, except for the bass player, but we all think he's gay...

[Byzantine Prince]

Tip 1: Be sexy

Tip 2: Don't critisize anything(my weakness)

Tip 3: Show off your ass by bending over

Tip 4: Show off abs by raising shirt like you just don't care who sees you

Tip 5: Ignore every chick you see(I think they find that mysterious)

Tip 6: GO up to them and ask them their names. Don't go all: "how you doin" No woman likes dumbasses despite what Friends might have taught you

Tip 7: Go to a hair salon and get your hair done, it'll make you look more sophisticated then you actually are

Tip 8: Let *her* ask you out first, and if she's too shy and you see it, then you work it in by obscurely asking her if she wants to go to a party or something of common interest.

That's all the advice I can churn out today. Use it well young padowan. :charge:

[JAG]

Didn't I already tell you Edz that women were evil?! :p

Attracting women is easy, just talk to them in flirtatious ways while looking them in the eye a fair bit - you can normally judge how you are doing by the response to that. As long as you don't say anything too bloody stupid and don't look like Michael Jackson, you should do pretty well.

The hard part comes after all that attracting bit, then women are bloody evil.

[Husar]

Tip 1: Be sexy
Hmm, I´m trying to some degree.

Tip 2: Don't critisize anything(my weakness)
I like to critisize in ironical ways, not meaning it like I say, but I know girls like to misunderstand that...


Tip 3: Show off your ass by bending over
~D

Tip 4: Show off abs by raising shirt like you just don't care who sees you
My upper body is not that nice and I´m still working on my muscles...

Tip 5: Ignore every chick you see(I think they find that mysterious)
That may be very well true, I did it whenever this certain girl didn´t seem to like me, it made the impression of raising her interest again...until she began to hate me. ~D

Tip 6: GO up to them and ask them their names. Don't go all: "how you doin" No woman likes dumbasses despite what Friends might have taught you
Ask for her name? I know it already without asking, but sounds like a mistake of mine.

Tip 7: Go to a hair salon and get your hair done, it'll make you look more sophisticated then you actually are
Just did not long ago.

Tip 8: Let *her* ask you out first, and if she's too shy and you see it, then you work it in by obscurely asking her if she wants to go to a party or something of common interest.
That´s very funny, because the girl I´m aiming at was apparently too shy, I asked her out in some stupid way and she didn´t respond for 3 weeks, I didn´t ask again, etc. blabla and now(>½year later) she hates me. ~D

But I got no problem with that, there have been enough girls who asked me, but I´ve always been either not interested or too stupid, I don´t take it too serious anymore and just laugh about it, I´ll find some nice girl somewhen, but I wouldn´t bother if it was soon. ~D
Of course I got no tips because I couldn´t even get a girlfriend myself so far. ~;)

[Byzantine Prince]

I like to critisize in ironical ways, not meaning it like I say, but I know girls like to misunderstand that...
Don't do it at all. Even if you are 100% right they will not appreciate it.



My upper body is not that nice and I´m still working on my muscles...
You're not attract pretty girls if your not fit, or at least skinny enough to be able to show muscle. Hell even the fat ones want fit men. ~:eek:


That may be very well true, I did it whenever this certain girl didn´t seem to like me, it made the impression of raising her interest again...until she began to hate me. ~D
Well you just keep ignoring them until they are ready for plucking. ~;)


Ask for her name? I know it already without asking, but sounds like a mistake of mine.
They ask something else, like how come you are here also, or somthing that has to do with the situation.



But I got no problem with that, there have been enough girls who asked me, but I´ve always been either not interested or too stupid,
Same here, when ugly chicks ask me, I blow them off, and when hott ones ask me, it seems to good to be true and I blow them off(which is a sign of stupidity really) :embarassed:

[Steppe Merc]

Have long hair. Then when they ask you to braid it, refuse at first, then reluctantly give in. However, it's a slippery slope, and so far it has only worked with girls that my best friends are going out with... I need to get out more...

[JimBob]

Lie, everything you do right treat as nothing everything you do wrong treat as everything, vice versa for them. Let them talk about themselves and when you find something similar to yourself relate. When ever they ask you to do something you don't want to slowly give in. And start off by making friends, ignore the boobs for a while and become the guy they know well and trust, then ramp up the "i wanna bone you" stuff, but do it with some more class than that. Or join a band, worked for Axl Rose.

[Goofball]

Title explains everything ~D

Everyone here, post your tips. Some of us are in need of them(not me!!!), so It would be a great thing.

And mods, if it is active enough, make it a sticky please. ~:)

Let me get this straight:

You're asking a bunch of patrons of an online wargaming discussion forum for tips on how to pick up women?

You might have better luck asking the patrons at the next Star Trek convention...

~:smoking:

[Brutus]

Do as the Brabantines do. Club 'em over the head and drag 'em back to your lair.

:wink3: Still the most effective way to do it...

[Azi Tohak]

Somehow, I think Goofball is right. But then...I've seen worse help on other boards. Not that I can think of where mind you...but I'm sure I have.

And yes, girls are nuts. They're fun, entertaining...but insane.

Azi

[UglyandHasty]

My best advices, smile, be confident and dont be scare of being turned away ! If that dont work, try with the next one ~D

[GoreBag]

Rock out. I have actually picked up chicks this way, and any chick you pick up from rocking out is the kind you want to have around.

[The Wizard]

Learn a latino dance. Merengue, salsa, whatever. Doesn't matter if she can dance them or not -- she'll love it regardless.

Oh, and style, confidence and your quick tongue are more important than your look. Okay, don't come 50 kilos overweight, but looking stylish, well-cared for, confident and expressing that last bit in words well will work just as well. You just need a bit bigger cojones, because you gotta do it yourself. But you can call yourself a real player afterwards. ~D

[Big_John]

every other time i see this thread in the frontroom, i think it reads "Tips on how to attack a girl". :shocked3:


.. paging doctor freud! :wreck:

[The Wizard]

Oh my, case 134: unprocessed dumped syndrome.

~;)

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Have long hair. Then when they ask you to braid it, refuse at first, then reluctantly give in. However, it's a slippery slope, and so far it has only worked with girls that my best friends are going out with... I need to get out more...

I've done that. It didn't get me anywhere, it just made me feel like a bit of a tit for 45 minutes while I kept the braids in to avoid offending her...

Hair should be worn down, so that it can sway suitably when you rock out.

[Byzantine Prince]

Tip 1: Be sexy

Tip 2: Don't critisize anything(my weakness)

Tip 3: Show off your ass by bending over

Tip 4: Show off abs by raising shirt like you just don't care who sees you

Tip 5: Ignore every chick you see(I think they find that mysterious)

Tip 6: GO up to them and ask them their names. Don't go all: "how you doin" No woman likes dumbasses despite what Friends might have taught you

Tip 7: Go to a hair salon and get your hair done, it'll make you look more sophisticated then you actually are

Tip 8: Let *her* ask you out first, and if she's too shy and you see it, then you work it in by obscurely asking her if she wants to go to a party or something of common interest.

Continuing...

Tip 9: Make sure you smell fresh, and clean. No chick likes smelly guys.

Tip 10: Don't try to hard to impress, that always ends badly.

Tip 11: Be subtle. Don't make a huge deal out of asking her out. Do it casually.

Tip 12: Where clean nice clothes that fit you perfectly. It's important in the "first impressions" department

Tip 13: Don't attack them(Big_John,lol). Don't just run up to them. Do it casually and with a purpose other then simply talking to them.

[ScionTheWorm]

get a batman costume, pierce your ear, cut of your beard, glue it to a frisbee and send it over a rainbow

[Proletariat]

One, three, four, five, seven and twelve will probably make them think you're gay. Unless you're going for the '&%-hag' girl, you might wanna go easy on the salon stuff.

Go with the Batman suit. At least it will be a funny story to your friends over beer.

[drone]

Be confident, or at least seem confident. Good hygiene is a plus. If you have some flaws, be able to joke about them, a sense of humor is always good. Look them in the eyes. If you can, observe them (not stalk them ~D ) for a while, to look for some clues as to what they are interested in. Don't use cheezy lines, just try to start a normal conversation.

And don't be afraid to approach the smoking-hot women. They usually intimidate most guys, so they generally only get hit on by sleazebags. If you are moderately normal, you have a chance.

Or you can get a dog. I got a puppy 3 months ago, and she is a chick magnet. I'm spoken for already, but it's always nice when they come up to you. ~;)

[Gawain of Orkeny]

Simple tell them your gay and women dont turn you on. ~D Many will try to cure you of this aflection. ~;)

[Byzantine Prince]

One, three, four, five, seven and twelve will probably make them think you're gay. Unless you're going for the '&%-hag' girl, you might wanna go easy on the salon stuff.
I was being semi-fascitious with "show off your ass" tips, but women DO look at stuff like that. Also if you have a nice head of hair, that's a huge plus, and going to a salon is essential. BTW what's a &%-hag girl? What's that mean?

Also only dissilusioned women with stereotyping tendencies would think you are gay by simply taking care of yourself. In Europe this would not be an issue since it has become the norm for males to work out, wear desent designer clothing and smelling fresh.

[ScionTheWorm]

not smelling like a corpse do help, yes...

actually being an asho does the trick, but you have to be a total bastard to pull it off... not for me that one

[Proletariat]

I was being semi-fascitious with "show off your ass" tips, but women DO look at stuff like that. Also if you have a nice head of hair, that's a huge plus, and going to a salon is essential. BTW what's a &%-hag girl? What's that mean?

Also only dissilusioned women with stereotyping tendencies would think you are gay by simply taking care of yourself. In Europe this would not be an issue since it has become the norm for males to work out, wear desent designer clothing and smelling fresh.


http://www.angelfire.com/ny2/Aternyde2/faghags.html


A male salon goer would be a turn off to me. I'm sure there are girls who'd disagree. *shrug*

Are you saying European males are vain, pretentious and self-absorbed? I found that as hard to believe as them being fresh smelling. (I kid, I kid.)

A man who looks like a man is a turn on. A man who looks like a flower isn't.

My 2p.

[Byzantine Prince]

A male salon goer would be a turn off to me. I'm sure there are girls who'd disagree. *shrug*
Suit yourself.


Are you saying European males are vain, pretentious and self-absorbed?
Nope, I'm saying they take care of themselves, almost as much if not more then women in the US.


A man who looks like a man is a turn on. A man who looks like a flower isn't.
By "flower" you mean what? A man is a man wether he wear nice clothes and takes care of his hair or not. I understand how some women might be metrophobic(lol) but I wasn't talking about extremes. I was simply naming off things a male can improve on to be more classy, not womanly. I think you misunderstood the level of extremety of my tips. *shrug* ~D

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Nope, I'm saying they take care of themselves, almost as much if not more then women in the US.

You must be talking about a different part of Europe to the one I live in. Most blokes here are just...blokes. It's the same in the other Euro countries I've visited. I'm not sure about Italy, I've never been there, but that might just be a stereotype.

[The Wizard]

By "flower" you mean what? A man is a man wether he wear nice clothes and takes care of his hair or not. I understand how some women might be metrophobic(lol) but I wasn't talking about extremes. I was simply naming off things a male can improve on to be more classy, not womanly. I think you misunderstood the level of extremety of my tips. *shrug* ~D

Well, David Beckham is a going a little far. I mean, I get called "Paris" for checking if my hair is in order at every mirror I see, but at least I look like a man... that is to say I take care of how I look and if it's stylish, and if my hair is in order, and if I smell good, but I don't shave my arms/legs...

Smelling good does not mean wearing Jean-Claude Gaultier as your eau de toilette. Personally I alternate between Abercrombie & Fitch Fierce, Polo Blue, LaCoste Pour Homme, and good old Dior aftershave... with Axe Marine as deodorant.

And by salon I hope you don't mean getting a manicure or anything ...? I just make sure my hair doesn't get too long. As in; the barber's shop.



~Wiz

[TheSilverKnight]

Tip 1: Be sexy

Tip 2: Don't critisize anything(my weakness)

Tip 3: Show off your ass by bending over

Tip 4: Show off abs by raising shirt like you just don't care who sees you

Tip 5: Ignore every chick you see(I think they find that mysterious)

Tip 6: GO up to them and ask them their names. Don't go all: "how you doin" No woman likes dumbasses despite what Friends might have taught you

Tip 7: Go to a hair salon and get your hair done, it'll make you look more sophisticated then you actually are

Tip 8: Let *her* ask you out first, and if she's too shy and you see it, then you work it in by obscurely asking her if she wants to go to a party or something of common interest.

That's all the advice I can churn out today. Use it well young padowan. :charge:

Replies to this

Tip 1: Not everyone is as sexy as you, apparently. Some chicks don't go for sexiness. Just be yourself, girls respect and admire that.

Tip 2: Correct on this, but don't be too goody-goody. Let them know how you feel, because some girls work for improvement and they need your help.

Tip 3: I'd recommend NOT doing that. I dunno how you attract girls where you're from, but in the civilised world, we don't do that.

Tip 4: Not everybody is that fit, and it may make her think you're rude and you have an ego to top that of Jay Leno ~;)

Tip 5: Somewhat correct. Specifically, ignore her for a bit, it'll get her a bit fumed and make her think "Hey, what's the deal? I thought he liked ME?"

Tip 6: Great plan. Agree fully.

Tip 7: Hair salons aren't necessary, but don't look a total slob. They don't like that.

Tip 8: If you do it first, it'll make you seem manly. ~D

[Byzantine Prince]

Why do you guys get hung up on the salon thing? It's not like it's every week, and it's not like you are gonna ask anyone out right there!

Plus it's not that obvious that you had yuor hair done, it just looks a little better styled. Not something you can't accomplish by yourself provided you have managable hair.

And yes bgin fit is important. Not that I'm a model, but I know what I need to do to be more attractive in general. Of course there are girls that don't give a crap, but in general they are not forgivin if you have a big stomache.

[The Wizard]

Yep, Chris, girls'll find your ass on their own. Just like me the other way 'round. ~;)

I'm not talking beer gut, but I'm saying you don't have to look like Bruce Lee (in body) to be attractive. Maybe in a TV show looking for the hottest guy, but not IRL. I maintain that how you talk is far more important. My body is far from Bruce Lee's but I get plenty play.



~Wiz

[discovery1]

Just plow along being your violent self and hope someone will come that will make the first move. Then ask them out.

This actually worked the one time it actually mattered(not that it turned out well....)

[Husar]

Hehe, I´m happy to have no problems with a beer gut, I´m 1,85m weighing around 65kg, I don´t want to eat until I got more weight, I want to get more weight in muscles if possible(not too much, some 70-75kgs would be nice).
If I may ask, what would you do with a girl that makes fun of you?
I got my very own story about this running, and I9 was pretty succesful in making her and her friends say they´d hate me. ~D I just have this problem of not being able to dislike them myself and it would be interesting to see if there is a possibility to turn it around again. Maybe not, but that wouldn´t be a big deal, Iknow, Iknow, I´ve got too much time for getting on other people´s nerves, but I think I can´t stop my heart from loving her although I don´t even knowing any good side of her character. I like to ride on my bike and for several reasons(not all connected to her) my route goes through her village. ~;) She likes me so much, that people in the neighboring village already know my name. ~;) Someone I haven´t seen before even tried to spit at me for some reason(sunno if he knows her is if he´s just against foreigners ~D ). To some degree I see this as a psychological experiment I make because I got too much time. Maybe it´ll end as soon as I get to study. Before i asked a girl out, she said "no!"(very clearly) and i forgot about her within a week, this story now lasted for more than half a year.

Ok, I feel like hijacking the thread with my story, don´t want that. ~D
Maybe my story is unclear, I just wrote what came to mind, but perhaps it shows that I have my very own methods to "punish" girls that make fun of me. ~D ~;)

[ScionTheWorm]

I think going on their nerves is a 1 percent chance of success situation..


Just plow along being your violent self and hope someone will come that will make the first move. Then ask them out.

that might work if you've just been in the hair salon and are showing off your ass ~D

[discovery1]

I think going on their nerves is a 1 percent chance of success situation..



that might work if you've just been in the hair salon and are showing off your ass ~D

It did work, and I did not go to a hair salon nor was I showing off my ass. I also called her stupid for not knowing where Baltimore is, before she showed signs that she liked me. Course, if said person hadn't made equally violent remarks I probably wouldn't care.

[Mongoose]

5 steps that always work....


1:Start many threads like this

2:tell them about the .org and your .org name

3:Wait about a week. then...

4:tell them that they are very ugly but you are kind enough to like them any
way

5:Yell "TELL WHAT BARTIX!?!?!?" right in her face

just try it :devil:

[edyzmedieval]

Great tips all of you.....

Great topic BTW.... ~D

[Voigtkampf]

Sometimes I forget my age and that some of my dear fellow patrons are only about to hit it off for girls for the first time, or that they are struggling at the very beginning. So, this time, I’ll give you some real advice (though the twenties stack does work!)

1. Be self-confident. That compensates for so many things, you would not believe me! When you see an ugly guy dating hottest girls, ask yourself; if he is not rich or in a band (I was in a band, and got far more after I quit it and cut my hair! ~D), then he must have self-comfidence. Women fall for that. Deep within, they are still in search for a stronger, protector type, but will fight a long time with you before they roll over and submit to your domination.

Btw, self-confidence doesn’t work for guys only, it works for girls as well. I knew a girl in the high school, and she was…well, ugly is not the real word. She was modern art combined with a Picasso seizure. No matter how cruel this sounds, it’s a fact that she had one eye lower than the other and always half closed, one side of her mouth was kind of lamed, so she would speak with the other side, and often she would have a string of mucus hanging from the upper teeth to the lower teeth. I shit you not!

This girl had been getting some each weekend, when she would go out. And that is true! There were times when even I would stare at her, the post-modern Quasimodo, and wonder what was so special about her… Akhm… Perhaps if I myself gave it a try…


See!?! SEEEE!?! ~D

2. Hygiene always helps.

3. Next to being a self-confident, be a decent loser. Being the greatest guy doesn’t mean you can get any girl. I’ve had my share of refusals, but what I did was something no girl ever expected; I’d just say “ok, hun, have a better one”, smiled at her, greeted her warmly and strolled off. I would still say hallo to her in passing, I’d be as cool as possible because I didn’t really care. Plenty fish in the sea.
That would drive them wild. I have so often received an initial “no” and then strolled away to the other that would say “yes”; my complete and utter indifference is what made them practically mad! They start to question their own value, why aren’t you crushed to ground and crying, wonder if they made a mistake… The slimiest thing is a guy that gets brushed off and goes “you damn bitch, you are not worth my time, yaddda yadda yadda” and then they go spilling poison to anyone who wants or doesn’t want to hear what a bitch that girl is. I never did that. There are plenty fish in the sea, my friend. I treat a no like a businessmen; ok, thank you for your time, have a pleasant day. And I mean it! Most of those girls that have said no in the beginning came back, but my policy was not to diminish myself, and even if I stayed polite and nice, I refused their approach. Take that, haha!

4. Do not concentrate on one girl. On a party or in a disco you can fly like a busy bee around about 6-7 flowers, I managed a dozen in my better days. ~D No matter how many say no to you, there will always be one that will say yes, and start acting on it. Better to get five “no” and one “yes” in a night then to stick to the same flower all night and be sent home under great pressure. Please, don’t do that.

I just remembered a party me and another girl threw in one summer; a beautiful night at the sea, nice easy going music, pretty girls, house for us alone. I was sitting with a girl on the couch, cannot remember her name, but I know that on another party several months ago she was dancing with me as she was practically sitting on my crotch, I shit you not. (Btw, she was engaged at the time with her first and only boyfriend; so much about decent women. That, of course, I didn’t know, I found only later.) So I sit and talk to people around, nip on my beer, listen to the music and caress the girls legs and back next to me. She wears this thin summer dress the weighs about the weight of a dream and looks even prettier. So, that dark-haired beauty turns around to me, smiles and asks:
“What do you think you are doing?”
I smile back and reply “What does it look like?”
“Don’t do that.” She says laughing, and I swear to you, you’ve never heard a “don’t do that” that sounds more like “keep going”. I knew it from our dance together from before, as well. So, things keep going as they did, I still make jokes and talk to people, while my left hand is still mapping her body. Not aggressively, just as you would, say, stroke your dog that would lie next to you. Again she turns around to me with her smile and a horny look in her eyes.
“Didn’t I tell you to stop?”
Me, being the frickin’ maharajah I was back then, reply calmly, not too loud, but not silently either, and everyone in the room can hear me if they wanted to pay attention.
“Woman,” I said smiling from my half-sitting and half-lying position , “you don’t honestly think you gonna sit there, smelling like spring, with your pretty legs and tush only an inch away from me and not to expect I won’t take a grab?”
“Yeah, that’s how I want to have it.” But her eyes lie.
I, on the other hand, am not even up for playing that game.
“Woman, if you don’t like what I’m doing, why did you sit next to me? See, there is some free place over there, at the table.”
So I got her cornered, but she won’t give up that fast. She really gets up, sits at the table and her eyes go “aaaa-HA! Thought I wouldn’t, hehe…”
To which I simply reply: “Damn, I am alone now here at the sofa, and I’m dying. Is there no girl that would like to join me here?”

Hold on for a second. Can you get any lamer than this? Probably, but this is already hard bottom of lameness. ~D

But another girl stands up and comes over to me. I just met her that evening, and she had the nicest smile and the biggest breasts of all attended.

“Much better.”, I replied, while the first girl looked like she was going to explode. Now, she got none that evening, I can tell you that. ~D Me and the girl number two, on the other hand, had great time, both on the sofa and on the beach later on in the early hours, we were seeing each other for year and a half (I was in my first engagement back then, so we weren’t exactly a “couple”…yeah, I know, instant karma’s gonna get me!) and had a lot of fun and good times.

Huh, this got long. Damn, I love talking about myself! Don’t do that too much before a girl, another good advice.

Good hunting, gents!

[King Henry V]

Be as smooth as silk, be a gentleman. They are rare nowadays and easily make girls curious. Put all her needs above your own. If she isn't a total slut, she'll probably like that.

[Voigtkampf]

Be as smooth as silk, be a gentleman. Put all her needs above your own.

Don't.

Unless you are into S&M.

[Steppe Merc]

Why would you go to a hair salon? Oh wait, I guess to cut your hair... hmm...


I've done that. It didn't get me anywhere, it just made me feel like a bit of a tit for 45 minutes while I kept the braids in to avoid offending her...

Hair should be worn down, so that it can sway suitably when you rock out.
No, I agree, I also felt like an idiot. I wasn't really being serious... ~;) I felt like an idiot, though I was high at the time, so that helped...

[Gawain of Orkeny]

Join a band ~D

[edyzmedieval]

Why should I?!

I'm very good the way I am, no need to join a band ~D

[Kaiser of Arabia]

5 steps that always work....


1:Start many threads like this

2:tell them about the .org and your .org name

3:Wait about a week. then...

4:tell them that they are very ugly but you are kind enough to like them any
way

5:Yell "TELL WHAT BARTIX!?!?!?" right in her face

just try it :devil:
I just did that...I have permanantly lost all feeling in my nuts ~D
jk

[The Wizard]

Voigt: Ah yes, the old gentleman's reaction to refusal. Works like a charm ~D

Dunno about the number four though. I've seen friends go around a disco doing exactly what you said -- and getting no play. But, then again, his game wasn't that advanced. Learned plenty as the silent observer though. ~;)

What a lame girl, really... playing is fine, but there is a limit. I'm not your ball of yarn, girl ~;)



~Wiz

[Meneldil]

Stop to be a nice guy (http://www.outpostnine.com/editorials/niceguy.html)
Leave the Friend Zone (http://www.outpostnine.com/editorials/zonetest.html)
Last step : be an asshole (http://www.outpostnine.com/editorials/reformation.html)

OutpostNine (http://www.outpostnine.com/editorials/)

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Azrael rules. That 'Death of a Nice Guy' article is a particular favourite of mine.

[Steppe Merc]

Rock groups get a lot of girls, if they are good. But if anyone joined a band just for girls, then I have no respect for them... That, or I'm just jealous... ~;)

[Byzantine Prince]

I can really relate to that article of "be an asshole" because I've had similar problems. I've been nice to girls and all they end up doing is talking to me about their feelings and their personalities. Not that I mind learning about other people, but you never get anywhere like that. You have to be rude, the problem is if you like someone you can't be not nice, or else it's dishonest. Well that's the major problem. I can't lie easily. When I tell women I couldn't care less for to blow off, they want me and pursue me even more, when I am nice with girls and listen to their problems then we are just friends or even lower. It's like by being nice you become a doormat. I don't know why this occurs, I'll never undestand, but from now on I'm gonna be like Azrael told me to.

[The_Mark]

Be a moron. It works for one of my friends quite well, but it has to come naturally.





And yes, I'm jealous. ~;)

[edyzmedieval]

What a great subject....

A tip:

Don't be too nice to girls, or as BP said, they start with the personalities and then you'll fall asleep, and she won't like that....

[King of Atlantis]

How to attract a girl-

be attractive. Sorry guys but that is the main thing girls care about just like guys. To get the type of girl in the babe thread you either have to look good to them or have tons of cash.

[Husar]

I just thought the same, BP.

But I know that deep down in my psychological castle that I´ve already built, I got that good oldasshole, it just takes time to dig it out. ~D ~;)

[Lazul]

walk up to the girl and say: Hey girl, once you go WHITE, you'll never go back.... AIGHT?*



*no im not a racist

[Byzantine Prince]

Don't be too nice to girls, or as BP said, they start with the personalities and then you'll fall asleep, and she won't like that....
No I don't fall asleep. As I said, I'm ineterested in people I like, but if I make myself open and accepting, they see me less as a mating partner and more as doormat friend. As the article says, you can't make yourself too available, and you can't make your person open, or they're gonna trample right over it. People are bastards, we all know that right?

[The Stranger]

yeah but there are nice Bastards too

[Steppe Merc]

How can you be mean to any girl, much less a girl that you like? I hate most guys in my school, mainly because their total assholes, especially to their girlfriends.
The worst is when they are mean to girls that they aren't even going out with, and they treat them like frikken cattle. Stupid shorthaired sport playing bastards... :furious3: (goes off in a corner, muttering)

[King of Atlantis]

How can you be mean to any girl, much less a girl that you like? I hate most guys in my school, mainly because their total assholes, especially to their girlfriends.
The worst is when they are mean to girls that they aren't even going out with, and they treat them like frikken cattle. Stupid shorthaired sport playing bastards... :furious3: (goes off in a corner to smoke, muttering)

well it depends on the girl. A lot of girls like being treated that way. But you really shouldnt be mean to someone you actually love.

[edyzmedieval]

Don't be an asshole to the girl you love....

If I had a beautiful girlfriend(I don't have a girlfriend now), I would stay with her all the time, kissing her..... It's really a blessing to be with a beautiful girl....

[The Stranger]

i never treat girls mean, though i cant stop teasing some, but i almost never go to far.

[The Wizard]

It depends man. The real player is pretty closed but suave at first, but opens himself up once she lets him in. The rule is that she goes first, you always open up second.

[Viking]

..As for music and bands, I know some musicians. Only one of them is not single, and she`s a girl. :inquisitive:

[BDC]

Money.

[Samurai Waki]

Coming from a guy who has expirience with money... yeah, pretty much if you don't resemble George Clooney or Matt Damon or some other handsome international personality your pretty much f*cked from getting the knock-you-on -your-a** Girls. Having that said not all women are looking for money, expiriment first, everyone is different, I hate generalizations, my last real girlfriend couldn't have cared less about how much money me or my family had.. it just wasn't important to her(and btw she was pretty smoking hot)... some chicks like deep people. My problem... I tend to be a little to shallow and vain on the surface, but you have to remind yourselves that someone with a good intellectual understanding is better for you, dumb people deserve dumb people, and if your a deep thinker like most of you people here, sometimes a stimulating conversation can be a good buffer between the sex, after all you won't be doing that with her all your life.

[Gawain of Orkeny]

I just club them over the head and drag them into my cave. ~;)

[Byzantine Prince]

No wonder you've been in prison Gawain. ~D

I think you guys misunderstand being an asshole. It's not like you go up ther and badmouth them to death for no reason. It's more subtle. Like you don't care about their feelings, you don't do them any favors, and you don't tell them the truth. If you do they'll treat you like a doormat. Take it from a guy with experience on this, don't open yourself up, to anyone, not even your friends, because chances are they are going to use that against you the near future.

[Gawain of Orkeny]

Are you saying women like being abused? Well they do as far as boy friends go. They tend to marry the well to do ones though. ~;) Didnt you ever wonder how some of these guys got such gorgeous wives?

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Take it from a guy with experience on this, don't open yourself up, to anyone, not even your friends, because chances are they are going to use that against you the near future.

You must have some really terrible friends. I'd trust mine with my life.

[Byzantine Prince]

They tend to marry the well to do ones though. ~;) Didnt you ever wonder how some of these guys got such gorgeous wives?
Occasionally, yes. But it doesn't matter, I'm not waiting till 'm 30 to get laid. :furious3:




You must have some really terrible friends. I'd trust mine with my life.
Right...

Today I'm only open with one of my friends, the rest can all die for all I care, because whenever they are given any sort of information that is sensitive they WILL use it against you, and that's the worst thing you can do to someone who has trusted you. And 99% of people will do this, from both sexes. Maybe I'm just unlucky and have only been aqauinted to weesels, but hey, that's life.

[The Wizard]

Take it from a guy with experience on this, don't open yourself up, to anyone, not even your friends, because chances are they are going to use that against you the near future.

True, true. I learned that the hard way. :no: Of course I'm talking of revealing my intentions -- and before I knew it they reached her and she steeled herself against me -- no matter how smooth I tried things.

But my best friends, my homies? Indeed -- trust them with my life as they can trust their's with me.

But lying about what you are does not work. Trust me -- I've seen it, and couldn't help having a snicker or two. ~;)

[Husar]

I know what you mean BP. ~:)
I lost so many friends for so different reasons (sometimes just the distance) I tend to care only about the really good ones.

[Roark]

My $0.02:

1. Don't be sycophantic, especially if she's hot. Be polite and charming, but have some respect for yourself.

2. Be confident. Don't doubt yourself, or talk yourself down. Avoid negativity overall (at least in the initial stages). Don't bignote yourself too much either. This comes across very badly.

3. Accurately gauge what is appropriate behaviour for a particular woman. Some guys can get away with inappropriate behaviour and language, but most chicks will add it straight to their sleaze files.

4. Put some effort into the way you look. For some reason, they respect this.

5. Identify what is interesting to her. Don't bend her ear with crap.

6. Be as genuine as possible. Lies usually get exposed at some point.

[HunkinElvis]

Find creative ways to say she is beautiful. Don't describe her in a sexy way unless it's the right mood to do so.

[Byzantine Prince]

My $0.02:

1. Don't be sycophantic, especially if she's hot. Be polite and charming, but have some respect for yourself.

2. Be confident. Don't doubt yourself, or talk yourself down. Avoid negativity overall (at least in the initial stages). Don't bignote yourself too much either. This comes across very badly.

3. Accurately gauge what is appropriate behaviour for a particular woman. Some guys can get away with inappropriate behaviour and language, but most chicks will add it straight to their sleaze files.

4. Put some effort into the way you look. For some reason, they respect this.

5. Identify what is interesting to her. Don't bend her ear with crap.

6. Be as genuine as possible. Lies usually get exposed at some point.
You are wise beyond your years my friend. Whatever your age.

[PanzerJaeger]

Drive a Land Rover. It makes them think you're sophisticated, yet adventurous.

Plus, all the gadgets really turn them on. One time my street truck was in the shop and I had to drive my offroad truck to the store and when I came out this girl was just staring at my snorkel. She asked what it was for and we got into a conversation about camping and the outdoors and I ended up with her number.. as usual I never followed through though.. :shame:

Anyway, cars seem to be good ways of attracting attention and getting things started if you can find a venue to display yourself and your car in the same setting.

[Voigtkampf]

Voigt: Ah yes, the old gentleman's reaction to refusal. Works like a charm ~D

~;)


Dunno about the number four though. I've seen friends go around a disco doing exactly what you said -- and getting no play. But, then again, his game wasn't that advanced. Learned plenty as the silent observer though. ~;)

True. Seen my own comment about my lame comments? ~D There are no good pick-up lines. Forget it. They’ve all been worn out. What’s a pretty girl like you doing in a place like this? Doh. ~D The best pick-up line is “Hi” or “Hello”. My name is… May I join you… Can I get you a drink?

It is the way you say that little stuff.

Guys make a mistake and if they get refused believe that their pick-up line is bad. So, they practice and then they really blow it. Hell, if she is going to shoot you down when you say “hi” to her, forget it, for what reason ever, she is not going for ya, lad. What to do? Carry on!

People that gain self-confidence, calmness and that naturally casual approach and way with women have success. If you are nervous, shy, reserved, insecure, then practice. Talk to women. Hell, I’m one of the few men that know as much about a woman as any editor of a woman’s magazine! I know their general seasons, how their bodies work, what do they like and dislike, why do they group in small packs for toilet, I know what they talk about there, I know everything! As Sun Tsu said:

"If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.

If you know yourself, but not your enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat.

If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”


So, get to know yourself and your enemy, the women. Oh, never think a woman is something dignified and exalted, angel-like creature. Pah! They are mostly worse then men!

And, contrary to all the people said here, you won’t believe what women are looking at the first. Your “behind”. I kid you not, they really do that! Why? Its not like they are going to take advantage of it once you are in bed!?! Nah, if you figure why they look at your ass, you figured a good deal about women.



What a lame girl, really... playing is fine, but there is a limit. I'm not your ball of yarn, girl ~;)

Oh, I let them play with me, but in bed, nowhere else! ~D

[Papewaio]

Think like a magpie / crow... they like bright shiny objects... so do girls.

So if you are confident and well dressed you will do okay.

Not that I was that confident when I asked Wasabi out to movies and a coffee... even less so when she said she couldn't because she was studying for exams...

Anyhow believe in yourself. Talk to the person. Relax and be yourself.

[Shadow]

~;)

why do they group in small packs for toilet, I know what they talk about there, I know everything!



So why do they group in small packs & what did they talk about ~D

[Kagemusha]

My pickup line:You want to be my next ex-girlfriend?Allways starts a somekind of conversation.Seriously,just be yourself.If it doesnt work move on. :bow:

[edyzmedieval]

My pickup line:

Do you believe in love at first sight?!
If no, do we have to meet again?! ~D

[Kagemusha]

My pickup line:

Do you believe in love at first sight?!
If no, do we have to meet again?! ~D

Thats a good one. ~:cheers:

[Laridus Konivaich]

Be an extrovert/confident, as said by many others :bow:

[Jammin]

Being yourself is the best advice anyone can give you to attract the opposite sex. Anything else is being a Fraud and not being honest upfront.
Being honest upfront is the most admirable quality that anyone will want in any relationship, and drastically reduces stress and hurt down the road.
So be yourself and be careful who you give your heart to.

[Gawain of Orkeny]

My pickup line:You want to be my next ex-girlfriend?Allways starts a somekind of conversation.Seriously,just be yourself.If it doesnt work move on.

I used to live with this guy who had the best pick up line ever. He would just walk up to girls in the bar and ask if they wanted to fook. I couldnt belkieve it when I saw him say this to some gorgeous girl. She said well thats different and at least your honest and off they went. This guy got lucky almost every night. He said 9 out of 10 times he gets his face slapped but that the 10th time always made it worth the pain. ~D

[edyzmedieval]

I used to live with this guy who had the best pick up line ever. He would just walk up to girls in the bar and ask if they wanted to fook. I couldnt belkieve it when I saw him say this to some gorgeous girl. She said well thats different and at least your honest and off they went. This guy got lucky almost every night. He said 9 out of 10 times he gets his face slapped but that the 10th time always made it worth the pain. ~D

LMAO.....

Indeed, the best....

[Kagemusha]

I used to live with this guy who had the best pick up line ever. He would just walk up to girls in the bar and ask if they wanted to fook. I couldnt belkieve it when I saw him say this to some gorgeous girl. She said well thats different and at least your honest and off they went. This guy got lucky almost every night. He said 9 out of 10 times he gets his face slapped but that the 10th time always made it worth the pain. ~D

True strategian.You dont have to win all the battles in order to win the war. ~;)

[swirly_the_toilet_fish]

You must be a walking contradiction. Aggressive but passive, cold but emotional .. uh .. this is making me sick. :sick:

[Byzantine Prince]

And, contrary to all the people said here, you won’t believe what women are looking at the first. Your “behind”. I kid you not, they really do that! Why? Its not like they are going to take advantage of it once you are in bed!?! Nah, if you figure why they look at your ass, you figured a good deal about women.
My tip no. 2 was show off your ass IIRC. I can't agree enough with you on this one. I have actually heard girls comment about how nice my ass looked behing my back. It's amazing. I don't know why they care, but they do, that's for sure.

I guess it's the same reason we care about their legs. :dizzy2:

[swirly_the_toilet_fish]

My tip no. 2 was show off your ass IIRC. I can't agree enough with you on this one. I have actually heard girls comment about how nice my ass looked behing my back. It's amazing. I don't know why they care, but they do, that's for sure.

I guess it's the same reason we care about their legs. :dizzy2:


I'm inclined to agree. When I played football (american) and worked out with the rest of the team I remember our coaching telling some of the phys. ed class "what the hell are you working on your arms for? Women don't look at your arms, they look at your ass." Since I have done nothing but squats, and I am currently very very happily married. :grin:

[Voigtkampf]

So why do they group in small packs & what did they talk about ~D

I ain’t sharing the secrets of the trade! ~D


My tip no. 2 was show off your ass IIRC. I can't agree enough with you on this one. I have actually heard girls comment about how nice my ass looked behing my back. It's amazing. I don't know why they care, but they do, that's for sure.

I guess it's the same reason we care about their legs. :dizzy2:

"Same reason we care for their legs?"

Let me see… I stroke their legs… Kiss and bite them too…

Damn, no girl ever nibbled on my ass…

:thinking2:

[Franconicus]

Teddies, you know! They are a girls best friend!

[TonkaToys]

Saw a programme on speed-dating a couple of nights ago on UK TV. They gave a man and a woman help from scientists that believed they had spotted some of the things that make men attractive to women and vice-versa.
The two assisted people came out with no dates out of 50 (woman) and one date out of 50 (man)! Shows you how accurate the science was!
Anyway, some of the scientific techniques you can try:
1) Don't wear aftershave / cologne, instead wear a concoction of Cucumber and Liquorice. The scientific test for this was to measure how sexually excited a woman became after smelling various things.
2) Look for someone that has the same face shape as you. This was a complete dud, people said they didn't want to date their brother / sister.
3) If a man, emphasize big shoulders and small waist. (If a woman, emphasize breasts, and have a small hip to waist ratio; as that indicates fertility... well duh!)
4) Finally, and this actually worked for men... look tall. That is it... apparently the two tall guys on the speed date got the most votes from the women, and it didn't matter what they said during their three minute conversation!

Now, where are my high heels?

[Ice]

[QUOTE=TonkaToys]4) Finally, and this actually worked for men... look tall. That is it... apparently the two tall guys on the speed date got the most votes from the women, and it didn't matter what they said during their three minute conversation!
QUOTE]

:wall:

Gah, i hate being short.

[thrashaholic]

Be British (proper accent, not t'Northern or Common innit) and go to America.

Simple as that. ~D

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

Be British (proper accent, not t'Northern or Common innit) and go to America.

Simple as that. ~D

Does that really work? I've always fancied having a crack at it, I must admit.

[BDC]

According to Reuter's, take her out on expensive but financially worthless dates, like for a meal or whatever. Then she will only accept if she's interested. If you buy her gifts then she might just be using you, but as you can't sell on a meal she will probably be genuine if she accepts.

[thrashaholic]

Does that really work? I've always fancied having a crack at it, I must admit.

Of course it works! No-one can resist the alluring charms of a polite well-spoken Briton, especially if you throw in a drop of dry wit and sarcasm into the equation.

I've had several foreign girls crumble at the first sound of my accent, they act shy and look at their feet (in a good way) even when I just say: "pleased to meet you". There seems to be a myth that all British men are charming gentlemen, which I strive to fulfill at every opportunity; alas most are not, but the myth perpetuates and is very useful (not that I try to exploit it in any way, that would be caddish). Unfortunately I don't travel abroad as much as I should or want to, especially considering the state of most British girls :help:

[Big King Sanctaphrax]

That's good. For years at school I was mocked for my accent. Vengeance will taste all the sweeter when it includes lovely American ladies besotted with my dulcid tones!

[xemitg]

Be clean

[edyzmedieval]

That's good. For years at school I was mocked for my accent. Vengeance will taste all the sweeter when it includes lovely American ladies besotted with my dulcid tones!

BKS,

No need for special accent. Your native language will do it(see Celtic tribes) ~D

Fancy giving me some lessons?! I really liked sophisticated stuff ~D

[Silver Rusher]

Hell, I’m one of the few men that know as much about a woman as any editor of a woman’s magazine! I know their general seasons, how their bodies work, what do they like and dislike, why do they group in small packs for toilet, I know what they talk about there, I know everything!
Are you a woman? If not, how do you know all that stuff?

Anyway, I saw a stupid program on channel Five (UK TV) the other night about why you see beautiful women with ugly men. In the end, the only thing those idiots could come up with for a reason was "sweat". So according to them, if your "sweat" smells nice, you get girls.

It was a silly program, written by the sort of person who would likely be editing heat magazine, but other than that I've got nothing.

[Voigtkampf]

Are you a woman? If not, how do you know all that stuff?

Uh, no, I’m not a woman. ~D

How did I learn all that? Years of data gathering, observing the wild in its natural habitat, shopping with them, reading their magazines, listening to them. Yeah, really, listening. You know, you look at her, open your eyes and ears and shut your mouth. Nodding helps. Also, spying on my older cousins helped a lot. Man, the stories I've heard... :help:

[edyzmedieval]

Uh, no, I’m not a woman. ~D

How did I learn all that? Years of data gathering, observing the wild in its natural habitat, shopping with them, reading their magazines, listening to them. Yeah, really, listening. You know, you look at her, open your eyes and ears and shut your mouth. Nodding helps. Also, spying on my older cousins helped a lot. Man, the stories I've heard... :help:

Hwo's about sharing some of them?! ~D

[Adrian II]

Ignore her.

Seriously it will make her curious why on earth you
are not interested in her.That is so true.

I must have ignored hundreds of thousands, nay millions of women during my lifetime, and they are still following and stalking me in hordes, shouting 'Why aren't you interested in me?' and 'You looked right past me in that supermarket on October 7, 1989, you bastard!' ~:confused:

Easy pickings my friends, easy pickings... ~:cool:

[edyzmedieval]

So true.

Ignoring girls is a great way to attract them. They are so curious, which makes them easy pickings.

Unfortunately, it's hard to ignore those who are very beautiful.

[Craterus]

Take your eyes away from their chest, ignore them and walk on! ~D

That should do enough for the "playing hard to get".

[Shaka_Khan]

You all have it wrong. It's not about attracting a girl...

[edyzmedieval]

You all have it wrong. It's not about attracting a girl...

Then what is?! Attracting a boy?! *throws out on the keyboard*

Oh well, my simple attracting technique:
Get them to the basketball court and let them watch how you play ~D

[Voigtkampf]

Hwo's about sharing some of them?! ~D

And leave you messed up for life? No. ~D Trust me, you don't wanna hear them! ~D

[edyzmedieval]

And leave you messed up for life? No. ~D Trust me, you don't wanna hear them! ~D

Come on! How dreadful can it be?! ~D

[doc_bean]

Saw a programme on speed-dating a couple of nights ago on UK TV. They gave a man and a woman help from scientists that believed they had spotted some of the things that make men attractive to women and vice-versa.
The two assisted people came out with no dates out of 50 (woman) and one date out of 50 (man)! Shows you how accurate the science was!
Anyway, some of the scientific techniques you can try:
1) Don't wear aftershave / cologne, instead wear a concoction of Cucumber and Liquorice. The scientific test for this was to measure how sexually excited a woman became after smelling various things.


I don't think getting a girl sexually excited works in your favor if you don't look the part. Besides, women like a man who puts in a little effort and so they like to smell a good aftershave.



2) Look for someone that has the same face shape as you. This was a complete dud, people said they didn't want to date their brother / sister.


Heh, me and my girlfriend look alike enough to have been mistaken for brother and sister. It was disturbing at first I must admit.



4) Finally, and this actually worked for men... look tall. That is it... apparently the two tall guys on the speed date got the most votes from the women, and it didn't matter what they said during their three minute conversation!

Now, where are my high heels?

I could have told you that. Being short you tend to notice these things. It's funny how the tall guys never seem to realize what they've got. :dizzy2:

[Adrian II]

I don't think getting a girl sexually excited works in your favor if you don't look the part.Getting a girl sexually excited always works in your favour, my friend.
Besides, women like a man who puts in a little effort and so they like to smell a good aftershave.I hate to disappoint you again, but women may be attracted just as well by the smell of sweat, engine oil, piss or heavy tobacco. Did you know what hormones and other human and animal excretions most perfumes and after shaves are based on?

That's right - you don't wanna know. ~;)

[doc_bean]

Getting a girl sexually excited always works in your favour, my friend.

Not if she has 50 other guys to chose from.



I hate to disappoint you again, but women may be attracted just as well by the smell of sweat, engine oil, piss or heavy tobacco. Did you know what hormones and other human and animal excretions most perfumes and after shaves are based on?

That's right - you don't wanna know. ~;)

But it's not so much the smell they're attracted to, it's the fact that you made an effort. Most women are turned off by a natural sweat smell, since they don't consider that clean, and most women do like a bit of hygiene.

[Beirut]

Another thing they love is when you come home insanely dirty, covered in sweat and balsam tree gum that stains you black, yet you smell like a pine tree. The forest my friends. What an aphrodisiac!

:gorgeous: "What do you do?"

:disguise: "I kill trees."

:gorgeous: "That's terrible! Yet undeniably alluring, and he does smell really good."

[Sigurd]

1) Don't wear aftershave / cologne, instead wear a concoction of Cucumber and Liquorice. The scientific test for this was to measure how sexually excited a woman became after smelling various things.A woman getting sexually excited over cucumber? Oh wait... :mellow:

[Adrian II]

A woman getting sexually excited over cucumber? Oh wait... :mellow:It's the Liquorice I can't figure out... :thinking:

[Strike For The South]

:smitten: mmm... Liquorice:smitten:

[Adrian II]

:smitten: mmm... Liquorice:smitten:Strike for the South, are you, perchance, a woman of the female persuasion? If so, will you please enlighten us -- yes Mods, I am formulating as clinically neutral as I can here -- with regard to the main or secondary hormonal effects of said candy?


:mellow:

[Colovion]

Tip:

Don't throw up on her.

[Byzantine Prince]

You ask - do you like animals?

She will most probably say - yes!

Then you say - what about trouser snakes?

She will most likely have a responce like - oooh! what's a trouser snake?

Then you do the inevitable, you pull your 'thing' out. Job well done. ~D



BP! :egypt:

[Strike For The South]

no just a guy who likes hormonal foods i guess ~D

[Strike For The South]

8% of the time this works all the time. ~;) For all us schoolmates out there sit behind a lady and say "now im not weird or anything but i've always wanted to touch/smell your hair" and don't i repeat don't break eye contact your bound to get a reaction ~:cheers:

[Shaka_Khan]

Then what is?! Attracting a boy?! *throws out on the keyboard*

Oh well, my simple attracting technique:
Get them to the basketball court and let them watch how you play ~D
Sorry, I'll rephrase that.
It's not about attracting; it's about...

[edyzmedieval]

Oh... I get the picture...

Any more tips?!
I have a friend near me right now, which was bewitched by a girl, my ex girlfriend :laugh4:

He's really desperate and he needs help....

[Meneldil]

Seriously, being a jerk or an asshole is really helpful, as long as you're not looking for a 'wife' but only for a 'girl'.

[Divinus Arma]

Ah hahahahahahahahaha!!!! This is the saddest thread of all time!!!!! :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

[Ashen]

Yep.

Anyways, make em laugh and if you aren't sure, don't bother. Nothing worse than successfully pulling a bird only to find out you don't actually like em all that much once you get to know em really well.

And be more interested in spending time with them than trying to chat them up. Friendship is the basis of the best relationships. Which is why my ex's all want to kill me.

[Alrowan]

my 2 cents, just dont be some boring self loathing sap... no-one likes a loser :p


actually, im a musician, i look like one too, i work in a supermarket, and have a fan club that always comes in, been asked out while i was working, had long hair, have short hair, etc

anyway, women arent too fussed on looks, my trick is the Enigma, im just one big mystery to girls, and it works, cus they want to find out more, but you have to give it to them in doses, one thing women do love is suprises and mystery. but be careful when your playing the enigma, let on too much and it will ruin it, dont let on enough early and they might lose intrest before you have them.
Apart form that, if there are girls you are interested in, dont try spend a lot of time with them in conversation, just small exchanges work best, keep them witty, and not too deep, and move on after 2-3 minutes, it might kill you cus u want to talk to them more, but hopefully it will arouse intrest and do just the same for them, keep this up for a month, week, or the evening, depending on the situation, then pull out the moves, get thier number, ask them out.

The trick is to get a girl to want to see more of you, and the best way to do that is to bait them here and there, give them a nibble, but then deny them a bite, eventually, if timed right youll either have them, or if u mess it up, they will just get extremly frustrated and angry XD

but once again i repeat DO NOT BE SOME SLEF PITY STORY (women hate that, had a friend who tried that on sooo many girls, all of them were his friends by the end, just none ever wanted to go out with him)

[R'as al Ghul]

That is so true.

I must have ignored hundreds of thousands, nay millions of women during my lifetime, and they are still following and stalking me in hordes, shouting 'Why aren't you interested in me?' and 'You looked right past me in that supermarket on October 7, 1989, you bastard!' ~:confused:

Easy pickings my friends, easy pickings... ~:cool:

LOL. ~D
See, I told you so.

'You looked right past me in that supermarket on October 7, 1989, you bastard!'
This one looks also promising. ~;)

I've another good tip:
Try all the above tips on a single girl....

[Beirut]

Ah hahahahahahahahaha!!!! This is the saddest thread of all time!!!!! :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

Really?

I thought this one was...

https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=51691

But maybe that's just me. ~;)

[edyzmedieval]

Beirut,

You give me chills. When I saw you replied to the thread, I thought you closed my best thread!!!! :laugh4:

Oh well, these have been useful tips... Now, let's go and conquer girls...

"We come. We see. We conquer" - Julius Ceasar

[Advo-san]

IMHO it doesn't really matter what you do or what you say. If a girl likes you you can talk all kinds of crap and still get some honey...

My pickup line: "Hi, I m George. U r not from around here, correct? Follow me, I 'll show you around! I know the best places here.." Joy style. Never failed me with the Ausies.

[King Henry V]

Adopt a French accent. I go to a French school where I live, so I could fool anyone in England. Was also very succesful with the girls.

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

Yep.

Anyways, make em laugh and if you aren't sure, don't bother. Nothing worse than successfully pulling a bird only to find out you don't actually like em all that much once you get to know em really well.

And be more interested in spending time with them than trying to chat them up. Friendship is the basis of the best relationships. Which is why my ex's all want to kill me.


Hi Ashen! Remember me, the .totalromer?

[edyzmedieval]

Adopt a French accent. I go to a French school where I live, so I could fool anyone in England. Was also very succesful with the girls.

Maybe that's why French is called the language of love ~;)

[Silver Rusher]

Whenever I do a french accent, it always sounds like I'm taking the piss out of them. Then again, most of the time I am ~D

[King Henry V]

However, this does not alter my opinion of the French!

[edyzmedieval]

Nor does mine....

But, still, we have to learn it, if we want beautiful girls holding our hand. ~D

[Silver Rusher]

Nor does mine....

But, still, we have to learn it, if we want beautiful girls holding our hand. ~D
Nah, if you REALLY want beautiful girls holding your hand, no language beats Italian. Remember what Charles V said? "I speak Spanish to God, Italian to women, French to men, and German to my horse". So, coming from one of the greatest (meh) Holy Roman Emperors, you should also speak German when you want to pull a horse. :laugh4:

[Byzantine Prince]

Well the truth is if you want someone trully worthwhile then nothing beats being yourself. They can only love you for who you are, if they don't then it's not worth it.

Memorize Ovid, Goethe, and Lord Byron poems, it doesn't hurt. It's a very nice way to show you like them. ~:) Better then flowers if you ask me. You have to make them feel like flowers because you feel that that's what you are. It's not pretentious if that's what you actually feel about them. It's not a trick it's just a way to do it.

[edyzmedieval]

Guess these tips are suited for when you are 16,17 or 18. Not now, when you are 14. ~D

Doesn't work now.

Oh well, I laughed at that very much.... "German for my horse" :laugh4:
As for Italian, true. Italian, Spanish and French rule.

[Shaka_Khan]

Just sweat out your pheromone and let her do her thing. If she doesn't, then just be friendly towards her. Give her space so that you don't frighten her.

[Ja'chyra]

Let me get this straight:

You're asking a bunch of patrons of an online wargaming discussion forum for tips on how to pick up women?

You might have better luck asking the patrons at the next Star Trek convention...

~:smoking:



Hahahahahaha, how true.

Anyway, my advice would be

1. Make her laugh
2. Get her drunk
3. Take her home

Simple

[edyzmedieval]

Hahahahahaha, how true.

Anyway, my advice would be

1. Make her laugh
2. Get her drunk
3. Take her home

Simple

Let's assume that I'm taking her to my home.
What am I going to do with her?!

~D

[edyzmedieval]

For the following situation, I need help.

A good looking girl, without a boyfriend. She declared to me that she is waiting for him, and she also said that she is not looking for any guy. Nice and sweet. I asked her, what is her favourite type of guy. She said: " I'm not telling you".

Now, how do I "conquer" her!? :embarassed: :help:

[Strike For The South]

Fly me to Romania and for a small fee ill take care of this "Guy" ~D

[edyzmedieval]

Shall I give you some flowers while you travel?! ~;)

~D

[Ja'chyra]

Let's assume that I'm taking her to my home.
What am I going to do with her?!

~D

If you can't figure it out then you don't deserve to know.

[edyzmedieval]

If you can't figure it out then you don't deserve to know.

Just kidding....

Can you help me, BTW?!

[Strike For The South]

Where how often and how long do you see her we need logistics before we can unleash the master plan ~D

[Ja'chyra]

First you need to figure out if she's worth the effort.

[Alrowan]

Guess these tips are suited for when you are 16,17 or 18. Not now, when you are 14. ~D

Doesn't work now.


at 14 dont even bother with girls, seriously, just go out and party with your mates till you hit about 17, then its more worthwhile, but in the end most are still too flippant untill thier 20's

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

Oh well, I laughed at that very much.... "German for my horse" :laugh4:
As for Italian, true. Italian, Spanish and French rule.
HEY! Horses more valuable than women at the time of Chales IV... ~D I mean...he was an Emperor...

[edyzmedieval]

at 14 dont even bother with girls, seriously, just go out and party with your mates till you hit about 17, then its more worthwhile, but in the end most are still too flippant untill thier 20's

They're seriously emancipated man..... And very developed ~D (if you know what I mean)

@ strike for south:

I see her often man. Just yesterday, I went with her and other 4 girls and 2 boys, strolling in the park.

[Byzantine Prince]

Just pull your *thing* out. That's what I always do, and it works! :dizzy2: ~D

[edyzmedieval]

Too direct ~D

You have to take a girl easily, then progress slowly. ~D

[Strike For The South]

Too direct ~D

You have to take a girl easily, then progress slowly. ~D

I dunno sounds like a plan to me ~:)

[King Henry V]

I have a cunning plan! Hire someone to attack her or something, then suddenly you step in and save her (having first arranged with the attacker that he falls down unconscious after just punching him once). She thinks that your her hero, and hey presto, she's yours.

[edyzmedieval]

I think it'll be to obvious....

She'll hate me after that!!!!! She only likes me as a friend. No relationship between us. ~:mecry:

[Byzantine Prince]

Oh man, stop sobbing and make her yours! Pull of a dinner somewhere, trust me she'll get the message. That is... if she likes you to begin with, nothing we can do if she doesn't find you attractive enough to date, but you can try.

If you give up everytime they want to be just friends you'll never get anywhere... like me:sad:. So just do it.

[BDC]

http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html

[Divine Wind]

http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html

Ohhh the ladder theory!

Basically an easy way of getting a good eye full of her rear end ~D ~;)

[Csargo]

~:confused: ~:confused: ~:confused: ~:confused: ~:confused: ~:confused: no comment
I need help also :help: :help: :help:

[Kaiser of Arabia]

I suggest, if you want to be really corny, get a band together and outside her house sing Blue Swede's Hooked on a Feelin'.

[edyzmedieval]

Oh man....

This ladder theory is great! ~D
I love it! ~D

[Voigtkampf]

Whatever you do, don’t give up easily. ~D

Not that it is a concern for any of you, but it will explain some things; I just ended a relationship that lasted for about four years, and have been “no woman, no cry” for three months now.

That is not an issue. The real issue is that I haven’t dated a woman for four years now (besides my own one). Odd, how you can’t get it right from the start. ~D

I meet this girl, a very tough nut. Straight as hell in her way of acting and speaking, but still toying, elusive, mocking, arrogant and sexy, even if short. ~D Damn, I want that biatch! First evening I make my move, still reluctant how far should I go (I never go for sluts, no fun in it, and you never really know where she’s been :thinking: ), and that little nutcase plays me so nice. Damn, she is dancing around me like Cassius Clay, landing jabs, dodging my poor attempts to knock her out, beating the shit out of me. I get frustrated, she drops her guard a bit, lets me come closer and “WHAM!”, right in the nuts! ~D Damn her, but I know, all is fair in love and war.

Would you like me to put it in TW terms?

:book:

I set up my hastily recruited army, line them up and start testing her resolve with few volleys of archer/catapult fire. She responds calmly in the same measure, buried in the ground, defensive stance, provoking.

I hit her left flank and she bends, right flank striking out. I pull back, go after the right flank, and in an incredible gracious harmony she pulls back her right flank, striking back out with the left. I lose my nerves and hit straight at the center, she falls back with her infantry and starts enveloping me with her both flanks. I barely get out of it alive. ~D Damn, that chicks has some mean moves, and she’s been playing Jedi mind tricks on me quite well. ~;)

Multiple advices. Don’t choose a tough nut for your first war objective. Take something less challenging. ~;) Also, do as I did, fight at several fronts, do not put all of your eggs in one basket. In the meanwhile, I’m getting some good results with other ones, but none is as intriguing as this one. Also, do not give up. Learn from your mistakes. Try different approaches. And take it easy, m8.

The current situation; she has the high ground (yeah, I know, its over, Anakin ~;)), defensive stance, her troops are fresh, she has all the benefits on her side. I have only one thing that speaks to my accord; time. I will wear her down. I will pound on her again, and again, and again, until I breach those walls, tear open the cursed gates, destroy the culverin towers, break into the town, cut down all the defenders, loot everything and molest the cattle. ~D Imagine she going straight to me “Well, I must hand it out to you, you are a tall, sexy mofo with some brains, there is no decent competition for you around here.” And then just grinning, like, “your move, m8, and you better make it good!”. ~D

I will quote “Bloody” Richard after his seduction of the young and beautiful Lady Ann: “I will have her…But I will not keep her long…” :evilgrin:

Patience. Sooner or alter, the Dark Side will prevail.

[edyzmedieval]

That's some real stuff right there mate! ~D

This ladder theory(haven't read it all) brings me to one question:
Why do girls like assholes, outlaw bikers and other crap men?! ~:confused:

[Byzantine Prince]

No they don't, it's just the fact that assholes don't take crap from nobody so the women have to make an effort. That's just how it works. Also the asshole wants "break down the walls and molest the sheep" far quicker then the nice guy who by first glance looks like he just wants to talk. Boooooring. You have to be prepared for battle my little medival friend. Say what you want and get it.

[edyzmedieval]

Yeah but, I'm not the nice guy who wants talking. And I'm not the asshole either, because it's not in my groove, except when I'm with my idiot classmates.(class camp on Monday, bleah)

I'm the middle guy.....

[sapi]

rofl@the ladder theory

it makes a kind of sense...someone hit me!

[edyzmedieval]

Yeah.... It's really off da hook....

Well, I'm meeting her today. I'll simply ignore her. Let's see how she faces it.

[Byzantine Prince]

Ok well don't just ignore her, because she might ignore you back. Instead push her around, and get really close to her face and smile till you get a smile back. That should work. You have to an apeman, if you want to understand human mating. Logic won't work in your favor in the game of love. You have to be random and aggressive.

[edyzmedieval]

We're going to a mall, with a couple of other girls and 2 of my friends.

When we meet, hugs and kisses with everybody(except the boys!). So, not that hard. But after that, it's a different.

She's a good girl, and she's mostly smiling. We're going to a movie, hopefully a horror one so she'll jump on me ~D

And about aggressive, you're very right. :bow:
But not too much, or it's gonna have very bad side effects.

[Byzantine Prince]

The force of unreason is strong in this one. ~D


Yeah definetly not abusive, just a little pushing. Tease her and go up really close to her face, and not just for the greetings kiss. Do it when you are alone with her. Like tell your friends you and her are getting candy or something. You'll find a way. The unreason will take a hold of you, and nothing can stop you after that. You are unstoppable. ~:cheers:

Enjoy your new found powers, and use them wisely young padawan.

[edyzmedieval]

One problem:

She won't go nowhere with me, especially alone. I tried it several times.
We'll see how am I gonna manage it.

Plus, hopefully I won't see a guy that I know. I had an argument with him, and he said when we'll meet again he'lll "pump" me. He's an idiot, bad marks at school, and visits the mall where I go very often!!!!!!! Hopefully, it won't happen.

[edyzmedieval]

Well, here's how it went.

Nothing special, only hugs and kisses and the beginning. She didn't want me to sit next to her, I really got angry after that. I tried almost everything but no avail. I'm ~:mecry:

Looks like she's slipping some words out. I told her who's my "enemy" to her heart, and she said: "Enemy?! No way!!" After I asked her what's the meaning of it, she said: "Nothing. Seriously, it's nothing". Very fishy.

What do you guys think she wanted to say about that?! ~:confused:

:help:

[Byzantine Prince]

Err I'm confused, you said "enemy" or did she say "enemy"?
Did you get really close to her, and grab her hand?
More importantly did you try to kiss her on the lips?

These things are important, forget the enemy crap.

If she still doesn't like you then you should try asking her why, straight to her face. It clears things up and you get to move on. You'll have plenty more opportunities, just don't get hung up.

[edyzmedieval]

Here's the stuff.

I said enemy first, and she said also,after. I tried that also. The only thing that worked is that she allowed me to hold her hand. From the ground floor to the 2nd floor of the Mall. About 1 minute and a half.

Ok. I'll try that also.

[edyzmedieval]

Tried it.

She said "What question is this?!". She completed"What fault do I have that I don't like you?!"

"I just can't tell my heart to love somebody"
"I can't fall in love at command"

But most important, watch this.

"I fall in love, without knowing it."

Damn it...you turn it in all the ways possible.... ~:mecry:

[Byzantine Prince]

And now is good time to ignore her completely and watch her drool. ~;)

I can't believe it's this hard though, you have to try and schedule some dates. Seduce and destroy! That's the way.

[Husar]

She is right by saying that she can´t love on command.
Maybe you can help her by seperating a bit as BP suggested. If that won´t work, move on I´d say.

[edyzmedieval]

And now is good time to ignore her completely and watch her drool. ~;)

I can't believe it's this hard though, you have to try and schedule some dates. Seduce and destroy! That's the way.

I'll try to ignore her completely. Though it's very hard for me ( you know what I'm talking about), I gotta do this because I love her too much. Plus, yesterday we went to a movie: "In Good Company". Kinda romantic, too bad she didn't let me stay near her. Damn it!!!!! ~:mecry:

Oh well, one conclusion: Love is blind. :smitten: :sweetheart: ~D

Many boys told me that she is very beautiful, so I have acquired a great virtue: Refined tastes ~D

And watch this, my ex-girlfriend told me: "Uh uh. No chances with her."

[edyzmedieval]

Any more tips guys?!

I don't want this thread to fade away.....

Let me ask you: Do you have a girlfriend?!

[Voigtkampf]

I had a...few, but now I’m collecting trophies only. ~:)

Even though my moves are rusty, I still know all the basics.

Number one rule is: do not give up.

If you are messing it up, mess it up real good, and learn from it. There are always other fish in the sea. But that you do at the very end.

Went to see the Evil One again last night. I climbed the hill, watched my troops swarming around the camp, raising trebuchets, digging trenches. This will be a siege, and I am getting a feeling that it will not be a long one. I feel the old strength returning, the Dark Side taking back the hold of my wicked heart. The walls of her city are high, the towers are ready to reign destruction and fiery death upon my troops, boiling oil is set up at the gates. And there is she, standing at the wall, seductive, elusive, challenging. Few more occasions for easy loot have appeared in the last few days, but iron against the steel is no test of strength. I want this city, I want to see these walls crumble before me, I want to set up my banner high in the ruins of her castle. I’m gonna beat her into submission so sweetly that she will praise the day I came to take her into my own private harem. ~D

Going by the schoolbook, and with few surprise sneak attacks I was at the gates last night. Then I pulled back. Oh, the sweet suspense! Once conquered, the sweet taste of victory begins to fade. I will have my time with this conquest.

Patience, my young apprentice. There is no speed in terms of speed, merely the issue of whether the things are in rhythm or not.

“Thus, though we have heard of stupid haste in war, cleverness has never been seen associated with long delays.” Be mindful of this as well.

[edyzmedieval]

I had a...few, but now I’m collecting trophies only. ~:)

Even though my moves are rusty, I still know all the basics.

Number one rule is: do not give up.

If you are messing it up, mess it up real good, and learn from it. There are always other fish in the sea. But that you do at the very end.

Went to see the Evil One again last night. I climbed the hill, watched my troops swarming around the camp, raising trebuchets, digging trenches. This will be a siege, and I am getting a feeling that it will not be a long one. I feel the old strength returning, the Dark Side taking back the hold of my wicked heart. The walls of her city are high, the towers are ready to reign destruction and fiery death upon my troops, boiling oil is set up at the gates. And there is she, standing at the wall, seductive, elusive, challenging. Few more occasions for easy loot have appeared in the last few days, but iron against the steel is no test of strength. I want this city, I want to see these walls crumble before me, I want to set up my banner high in the ruins of her castle. I’m gonna beat her into submission so sweetly that she will praise the day I came to take her into my own private harem. ~D

Going by the schoolbook, and with few surprise sneak attacks I was at the gates last night. Then I pulled back. Oh, the sweet suspense! Once conquered, the sweet taste of victory begins to fade. I will have my time with this conquest.

Patience, my young apprentice. There is no speed in terms of speed, merely the issue of whether the things are in rhythm or not.

“Thus, though we have heard of stupid haste in war, cleverness has never been seen associated with long delays.” Be mindful of this as well.

I won't even think of giving up. She's a real trophy. Very gorgeous girl ~D
She doesn't have a boyfriend, but she likes a 16 year old(bleah!).

Patience and cleverness is the thing.

[Dutch_guy]

Plus, yesterday we went to a movie: "In Good Company". Kinda romantic, too bad she didn't let me stay near her. Damn it!!!!!

Edyz, from the sound of that she doesn't feel very comfortable in your company - a bad thing.
I think that should be your first priority ; making her enjoy yor presence - not get scared ( for want of a better word ; ) when you hint on wanting to sit next to her.
As many have said before , make her laugh - go out with her a lot , and let her bring friends if she wants.
Don't make her feel uncomfortable by telling you love her - how noble this may be .She will think you want to go way to fast, since you guy's don't have a real ''relationship'' yet.
Just do the next best thing, tell her you like her ( sounds less intimidating than love ) and preferably when you're alone or when you really thing that she'll respond in a better way than she did before.

:balloon2:

[edyzmedieval]

Yeah.... This is the thing. I said to her that "I love you", so maybe that's why she doesn't feel comfortable with me. I meet her a lot. I've seen her many times this week.

Now it's the hard part. I really love her, and I won't let it slip away.

[Ianofsmeg16]

Edyz, how long have you been in love with this girl? cos there is like an "invisible barrier of time" where it stops being cute and gets wierd. It happened to me last year, i had speant a whole year going after this one girl and on a school trip to spain she came up to me and said back off this is getting weird. My point is, if she hints that it is getting weird, back off and love her from afar (not literally) be friends with her for a few months, even help her with any guy trouble and then once you've become really good friends you'll know weather to ask her out or not...
Good luck and when it works....buy me a beer

[edyzmedieval]

I like her for about 2 weeks. And I went with her and some friends out many times. Yeah, it's kinda of a restart.

And ok, I'll buy you a beer! :barrel: ~:cheers:

[Voigtkampf]

So you've said you love her? Missed that part… ~:verysad:

You are boxing with Mike Tyson and you just willingly tied your right hand behind the back. :help:

Rule number two: never say that you love them, especially if you do.


You are in a world to hurt, m8, Godspeed. :embarassed:

[Byzantine Prince]

GAH! You never told me you said "I love you"!!!
That changes everything, no wonder she doesn't want to be with you, you creeped her out now she thinks you are some monster.

Ok now you REALLY have to ignore her if you don't want a restraining order.

[edyzmedieval]

Guess this is the only way.

I have to restart the whole thing, got damn it. But, how much do I have to ignore her?! That's the hard part.

[Dutch_guy]

Well stop showing intrest in what she's doing all the time , you can of course stop ignoring her when she starts talking to you- there's no need to be mean ~;)
And if you can manage it , stop / reduce the time's you see her ,but don't overdue it and make it seem that you might hate her.

:balloon2:

[Ianofsmeg16]

Or you could just talk to her.....say that your sorry for freaking her out and that you dont love her anymore, say that a friendship is all you want then be the best friend you can to her, wait around two months and start showing intrest again
just so you know, you saying that you dont love her will be a lie! but the key is communication, both lack of and abundance of. At some points you may be required to 'ignore' her (not be a close friend) and times where you pay close attention to her(when your out alone for example, this does not mean getting "close" if you understand me) but soon, if your a good friend, she get around to loving you as much you do her, its just that you need patience.

BTW is this girl hot?

[AntiochusIII]

Or you could just talk to her.....say that your sorry for freaking her out and that you dont love her anymore, say that a friendship is all you want then be the best friend you can to her, wait around two months and start showing intrest again
just so you know, you saying that you dont love her will be a lie! but the key is communication, both lack of and abundance of. At some points you may be required to 'ignore' her (not be a close friend) and times where you pay close attention to her(when your out alone for example, this does not mean getting "close" if you understand me) but soon, if your a good friend, she get around to loving you as much you do her, its just that you need patience.

BTW is this girl hot?I think this advice kinda fits well in the part of an intellectual whore, you know. Kinda risky...

~;)

[bighairyman]

Be funny, be confident, be yourself.

[Voigtkampf]

Well, you messed up big time, no doubt about that.

But only valid advice is to push forward.

Stop talking about love, hold your ranks firmly together and slow down your advance.

Once you jump into the water (by saying the dreaded “L” word) you can’t change your mind half way in the air.

You can only prepare for the impact. ~;)

[edyzmedieval]

Well,

I'll talk to her, no need to be mean, as Dutch_Guy said. I've assured my back anyways, because she knows that I also like another girl(actually I don't, I just said that so I can make her gelous, to find out if she likes me). So, I think I'll stick to that, so she won't think that I still love her.

I'll have to wait for a month or two, then restart the whole thing. But this time, progressively, or it's the Abyss for me, just as the Ladder Theory says.

@ian_of_smeg16

Yeah, she is. But I won't give you her messenger ID or phone number. ~D

[Kagemusha]

Have Patience Edyz my friend,patience.Think of this like a siege.If you cant crush her gates immediately.Exhaust her with time.You have to think what she likes and offer her that.The confession about loving her made this really hard for you.You have to think to go around it and make her forget it.Its all about needs and how to deliver for those needs. :bow:

[Ianofsmeg16]

Have Patience Edyz my friend,patience.Think of this like a siege.If you cant crush her gates immediately.Exhaust her with time.You have to think what she likes and offer her that.The confession about loving her made this really hard for you.You have to think to go around it and make her forget it.Its all about needs and how to deliver for those needs. :bow:
LOL Crush her gates...what an innuendo!
but he's right, have patience my brother and things will work out ~:cheers:

[Dutch_guy]

because she knows that I also like another girl(actually I don't, I just said that so I can make her gelous, to find out if she likes me). So, I think I'll stick to that, so she won't think that I still love her.

yeah , that's a good idea actually . And this way you'll know by her reaction if she likes you

:balloon2:

[edyzmedieval]

yeah , that's a good idea actually . And this way you'll know by her reaction if she likes you

:balloon2:

She said:

"Just to tell you, Sonia(the other girl) is in the park".
Also she had her hair in a pony-tail and she also said: "This(she had that thing which keeps the girl's hair in a pony-tail) is from Sonia".

Not much of an evidence that she likes me though.

:embarassed:

[edyzmedieval]

You guyz have a girlfriend?!

If so, how have you "conquered" her?!

[SwordsMaster]

You guyz have a girlfriend?!

If so, how have you "conquered" her?!

The DArk Side is powerful, my young apprentice.

Actually it was a blurry and confusing night (my birthday party), due in part to the amount of alcohol ingested. We had known each other for a few months now, but the alcohol kinda tipped the balance in the right direction. ~D ~:cheers:

[Byzantine Prince]

HAHA! Of course the secret variable to this equation is alcohol. Why do you think it's so popular in bars and teen parties. It helps get people so loose that they don't care about being who they really are.

En vino veritas, is what the Romans said, or somthing. It means in wine the truth is revealed. And it's couldn't be truer.

[edyzmedieval]

Finally....

I overcame the hard part. I told her that I don't like her anymore. I asked her if we are gonna remain good friends and she said yes.

Now, assemble the army for a one month march to Constantinople(she).

@ Swords Master

Lucky dawg.... You got a birthday and a girl and birthday presents!!!!!

[edyzmedieval]

Well guyz... Bit of update

I told her that I don't love her anymore and the result: she's a bit more communicative with me!!!!! ~:eek:

Oh well. I'm preparing the army. I have to be very prepared for the siege. Couple of Siege Cannons, Trebuchets, Heavy Onagers, Sap Points should do the work, coupled with dismounted Kataphraktoi and Varangian Guards.

~D

[King Henry V]

So let us put this into military terms. You assembled your armies in preparation of the invasion of her country. Any attempt to make a reconnaissance of her forces/feelings were met in force by her armies. Then you tell her that you plan to annex/love her. She responds by putting more troops along her borders. Not a good sign. Far from an amicable invasion, it seems as though hostilities are about to break out. You decide to open diplomatic relations/talk to her. You tell her that you are interested in another country/girl and feint a withdrawal of your troops. She still keeps her troops put. She is not budging. Finnally you open diplomatic relations once again. You tell her that you have abandoned all plans to annex her and request the resumption of normail friendly relations. She agrees.
Well my friend, militarily this does not look good. Your morale has been a bit dented and any invasion would be uncertain in its outcome. Should it fail, morale will go down more. Somehow you need to convince her that an occupation of her country would be a good thing.

[edyzmedieval]

Yeah, well, I haven't prepared sufficiently.

My name is "The Ottoman Sipahi" who at least on the 3rd try conquered Constantinople ~D

My morale has not been dented. It would have been dented if she hadn't agreed the normal diplomatic relations.

[Voigtkampf]

Damn, I think I shouldn't have made this comparison with love and medieval war. ~D But older patrons might know that this is my running gag for a long time here on .Org, even before I joined it.

Edyz, you are in a mess now, the faint with the “I don’t love you any more” has brought you a little more maneuvering time, but do not fool yourself; you are on swampy terrain now. She is still on alert from you, like a startled animal that has heard a wig cracking underneath the hunter’s foot, ready to run away at the slightest sign of danger. If you pull another frontal assault any time soon, you’ll mess it up for good. You need patience now.

When on surrounded ground, plot. When on deadly ground, fight. You are now on surrounded ground, fighting will be your demise. Maneuver carefully around her, wait for your chance, learn all about her, get to know your enemy. You can take a completely different approach, hell, you must. And never, ever again say “I love you”. That is always dangerous and works only in movies, in my experience.

Not to brag around, but the last night I made some complicated maneuvers, fainted an attack on the west gate and hit the central gate instead, massing my troops and sending in a wave after wave. Then I stop, regroup, attack again. I have fought a lot of battles before, and perhaps my edge is not as sharp as it was few years ago, but I believe it has more to do with the fact that she is a tough negotiator. ~D

The result? I broke open the gates, the outer wall has fallen.

Not bad for someone who has been in 4-year long relationship and hasn’t dated any other woman in that time. Rusty, perhaps, but no old iron yet. ~;)

But I have come to respect my opponent greatly. I think I will push for an alliance rather then for a merciless destruction. She will pledge allegiance to me, and yield before my power, but she will remain free. It is a great joy to observe such a defiant warrior woman, proud, skilful, fearless and, last but certainly not least, beautiful and intelligent.

But for now I think I’ll enjoy some looting. ~;)

Oh, yes, the bad side is that I will have to pass on another WoW instance run this weekend. Damn, this real life thing is getting in the way of my gaming habits. :help:

[edyzmedieval]

Voigtkampf,

You're a real Siege Assault Expert ~D

Yeah, well I'll let her cool off for a month, and then start off again. But this time, march not rapid march, or the abyss for me.

But, after I become very good friends, how am I gonna jump the ladder?!
From the friends ladder to the "real" ladder!!!

[Voigtkampf]

Hard to say. There is no general advice on this a subject, a fail-safe recipe to follow.

Avoid bragging, yet inspire the notion that you are a cool, smooth operator. Behave with her almost as you would behave with your friends. Most of the time you should ignore her as a female, but from time to time comment something on her, how good she smells that evening or that you like her hair that way better or that she has a nice dress/outfit.

Wait for the right moment. You should feel when it comes.

Of course, if all else fails, try to get her drunk. :book: Cheapshot, but it works. ~;)

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

Yeah, well, I haven't prepared sufficiently.

My name is "The Ottoman Sipahi" who at least on the 3rd try conquered Constantinople ~D


Then why the hell are you using Varangian Guards? ~D

[Dutch_guy]

Of course, if all else fails, try to get her drunk. Cheapshot, but it works.

yes , but if you are that desperate , you must make sure she really is drunk, that way if something goes wrong, you can deny it on the spot; ''well I sure as hell don't remember doing anything like that , it didn't happen you hear me ! ''
And she might have forgotten it all the morning after.

Still I would recommend doing it , however if you're that desperate , it might work.

:balloon2:

[Divinus Arma]

heeh hee heee heee lol

This thread is a riot. :laugh4:

[Roark]

You guyz have a girlfriend?!

If so, how have you "conquered" her?!

With my concealed and impetuous 8 valour Mangonel, of course!! ~;)

But seriously, I made her laugh. I made her laugh her arse off, and for some reason she kept calling me up.

I got engaged to her last weekend. ~:cheers:

[HunkinElvis]

Shave your body. ~D

[King Henry V]

With my concealed and impetuous 8 valour Mangonel, of course!! ~;)

But seriously, I made her laugh. I made her laugh her arse off, and for some reason she kept calling me up.

I got engaged to her last weekend. ~:cheers:

Congratulations Roark. ~:cheers:

[Voigtkampf]

I got engaged to her last weekend. ~:cheers:

Oh, you poor bastard. ~D You know what they say; marriage is what comes after life and before death. ~;)

Well, honestly, congratulations! ~:cheers:

I was engaged twice, dropped it twice. :duel:

Got “disengaged” some three months ago.

Now getting engaged in some immoral activities only, with varying oponnents. :charge:

That kind of engagements is what I prefer now. :smug:

[Ianofsmeg16]

With my concealed and impetuous 8 valour Mangonel, of course!! ~;)

But seriously, I made her laugh. I made her laugh her arse off, and for some reason she kept calling me up.

I got engaged to her last weekend. ~:cheers:
Well done Mate ~:cheers:
Any advice for us "un-comitted" chums of yours?

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

Remember-

"Marriage is a coffin and every child is a nail being pounded into the lid"-Homer Simpson.

My dad had a good laugh there. ~D

[edyzmedieval]

I'm baaack in business!!!!

Now, since I'm back from the horrible school camp, it's time for preparing and conquering ~D

[SwordsMaster]

Remember-

"Marriage is a coffin and every child is a nail being pounded into the lid"-Homer Simpson.

My dad had a good laugh there.

Or, in the words of a drunk (and therefore wise) friend of mine:

"Marriage is like a tatoo. Expensive, good looking for a while and the less you think about it the less painful it is." ~D

[edyzmedieval]

Yo guyz....

Who has a girlfriend here?!

[Muska Burnt]

all you need is 9 inchs and there happy

[Silver Rusher]

Yo guyz....

Who has a girlfriend here?!
Nobody... (just to revive this dead thread)

[Redleg]

To revive it again without reading all the comments -

Stalking is a good way to attract a girls attention.....~:eek:

[Shaka_Khan]

Show your nude body to her and don't be shy. Women like honest and confident men.
If you're shy then you could change your clothes while you pretend that you don't know she is there.

[Strike For The South]

I love this thread~:cheers: Of course being the absolute stud that I am. All I have to do his give them one good hard look in the eyes and they are mine~:cheers:

[LeftEyeNine]

I did not read the previous pages, so if already been said I'll be seconding something. But if not, I'll be giving you the golden rule :

Never ask others what to do to attract/approach a girl. Be yourself, be a man. Fakes don't get along for long, the unlucky girl will sooner or later find out that you are a pathetic thread-follower.

Reality hurts.

[edyzmedieval]

I really like that this thread took off again... ~:cheers:

Show your nude body?! How come?! I know they like confident men, but not that!!! ~:eek:

[Voigtkampf]

Consider this; do you want a girl that falls on you because you just showed your nude body, and that was enough for her? Moral aside, man, she will leave you with more than you bargained for! Take it from a man who basically matured in the red district of Hamburg, Germany; I had insane luck and got off without catching anything (I still can hardly believe this), but not all of my friends were as fortunate. Nothing lethal, but still some stuff that they will not forget so easily.

I have always gone for the hardest-to-get girls. I honestly have. Generally, they have a low mileage, good reputation, and you can dare and have unprotected sex with them after a while. Hell, when I was younger, I had unsafe sex all the time! But I went for the girls that didn’t change men like their underwear, guess that’s what saved my skin. Yeah, it’s a tough fuckin’ world we live in, wake up and smell the waste disposal. This is especially directed at all of our younger members; when you get a girl, make sure that you know what is she like before you go too far.

[doc_bean]

She's 14, I seriously doubt she has a lot of 'milage'...


and you can dare and have unprotected sex with them after a while. Hell, when I was younger, I had unsafe sex all the time! But I went for the girls that didn’t change men like their underwear, guess that’s what saved my skin.

You were very lucky then, there are a lot of people out their who haven't had that many partners and who caught VD's. Your chances might be better if you are careful who you sleep with, but the statistics will catch up with you eventually...