:laugh4:
[/thus laughed the retarded atheist]
Why is he choosing Mormons, though? I always thought the Jehovah's Witness are far more notorious in this practice.
Oh, and the guy's accent, voice, and way of speaking is hilarious.
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:laugh4:
[/thus laughed the retarded atheist]
Why is he choosing Mormons, though? I always thought the Jehovah's Witness are far more notorious in this practice.
Oh, and the guy's accent, voice, and way of speaking is hilarious.
It depends on what part of the country you're in, as to whether or not the knock is Jehovah's Witnesses or Mormons.
I like that video. Reminds me of the time I saw the bike-riding, white-shirted, bible-toters working their way down my street when I was in high school. I had time to go grab a black, full-length hooded cloak I'd had made for a Renaissance festival costume. I donned the cloak, pulled up the cowled hood and then found a bunch of candles to light. It was late evening, and so dark, when they got to my door. They knocked and and were greeted by a cloaked and hooded figure standing in a dark, candle-lit room. When they began their spiel, rather nervously, I interrupted and invited them to participate in my evening ritual and convocation of the spirits. They left - rather quickly. :wink:
I think you'll find tht the god-squad started it, a bit further back. ~;) But I don't mind being called a retard, maybe it suits me! :laugh4:Quote:
Originally Posted by Don Corleone
Spetulhu:
Do you really manage to expedite a JW/Mormon retreat by being polite? They must be really obliging round your neck of the woods. In these parts a polite refusal is virtually regarded as an invitation from a long lost brother. Boy, are they persistent.
Funny vid, but none too subtle. Loved the old geezer wielding his might broom.
In my neck of the woods, the Jehova's Witnesses and Mormons kind of have street battles. Where a Group of Mormons goes to one house, talks the person, leaves, and then the JWs go to the same house an hour later... all in all, it just tends to sour the person towards either side. I remember one bright morning about 3 years ago, I was staying at a friends house in Seattle, my friend had finally had enough of the Mormon's coming to his house (about 6 times in 2 months) so he opened the door completely nude. He hasn't had a visit to date.
Politely tell them you left the church and aren't going back. Then tell them their brand of Abrahamic religion is no more enticing than the one you abandoned. They tend to give up at this point. Remember that these people are on a point system. They get points for initiating a conversation, giving away literature and inviting you to bible studies etc. Tell them straight up that you won't have any and the veterans go away. Why bother selling religion to heathens when you can try their neighbors?Quote:
Originally Posted by Red Peasant
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mithrandir
I'm going to start a new thread then...
as for the movie, this is from an episode of 'John Safran vs God' which aired in Australia last year, maybe the year before and has since repeated at least once...
it's a very funny series...
:2thumbsup:
Alas, I myself have a gross inability to be rude to these people. Infact some crazy looking Greek fellow has decided to come along tomorrow morning and have a conversation with me about how the answers to the most profound questions can be found within the bible. I don't really want to, but I just find myself nodding and smiling when Jahova's Witnesses start to rant at me. I'm such a bloody pushover.
I'm only a pushover when it comes to muslims. There really is no good way of winning there.
Door-to-door Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses amuse me to no end. So much, in fact, that I usually use one of my own tactics to scare them off.
1. Talk about how you found Jesus at an orgy, then continue to discuss how holy orgies are because of it.
2. Answer the door naked.
3. Talk about the divinity of waffles. For better emphasis, make them some waffles and discuss how you consume God's power when you are consuming the waffles.
4. Buy some pig or cow blood from a local butcher beforehand. When they knock on your door, quickly spread it over a steak knife and some on your clothes. Answer the door.
Live for the moment, be a Free Thinker!
Here's a new thread to discuss Atheism and similar ideologies...
Regarding Atheism, Agnosticism, Humanism, Rational Skepticism, etc...
https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=73476
Sorry for beating that dead horse.
Back on topic:
I don't really see why you need to go through the trouble of going to the JW's/Mormons, just let them come to you.
"Did you know that if you're a Jehova's Witness, you're not going to heaven?"
"Did you know that if you're not a Viking, you're not going to Valhalla?"
A Mormon, explaining tolerance of make-believe atheist evangelists, citing "Mahatma frickin Gandhi"...Quote:
Originally Posted by Pindar
irony so rich I fear I drown in ferrous fulsomeness. :laugh4:
If I was going to go door to door preaching, I would preach about the wonders of Raptor Jesus.
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
I live in California. We have every stripe and hue of people and thought in amounts to spare.Quote:
Originally Posted by Spetulhu
I thought it was pretty good too, glad I'm not alone. ~;)Quote:
Originally Posted by KukriKhan
Would you really :whip: me? Hmmm... tempting... :eyebrows:Quote:
Originally Posted by Mithrandir
No comment.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kekvit Irae
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
On topic again: VERY amusing video :laugh4:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aenlic
loool.....you actually did that?....:laugh4:
Ah yes mormons. We have something not that different. Jehovas. Always waking you up on Sunday, making you open the door wearing your pyjamas. And it's even worse if you have somewhat long hair. You open the door looking like a wild baboon, with temporary the same intelligence, and what do you see? Two overly happy men or women asking you if you don't dream of a better place. You think, indeed I do, a place where they don't wake you up to talk about nonsense! But the problem is, they don't really want to talk about the bible or anything, they just want to annoy you and use a simple excuse. But a terrific excuse, as they make you think that they don't know any better. They believe the world will be destroyed in a not so far future and all other kinds of strange things, at least they say. Anyway, this makes them look so stupid that you forgive them. And you think, poor stupid fellars (as you might also get up early every day if you tought the world could be destroyed any time. You too would want to make the best of it, now you still can.)
But then you, I mean they, start talking and come up with the most bizarre arguments why all the nonsense they talk about is true. And then, even tough you are so tired and barely are able to preform the most simple actions (that's why they come so early, as any reasonable man when awake would kick them out), you figure them out. Even they, with their dull faces, rediculous clothes, even they aren't that stupid!
Now, they want to irritate people and make them believe the strangest things, right? Well what if I try to irritate them. So then you invite them in. You give them some coffee. And you talk talk and talk. About how the easterbunny is a sex-symbol and offensive to Jezus. (Yes they really really told me so). You make them talk and you keep them talking. But they realize that you don't get irritated and they figure you don't believe a word they're saying. But you keep talking and talking and talking. And they get irritated but can't just go like that. It doesn't mind anyway, you think, it's not like they are going to influence me or anything, they are just some stupid dull irritating jerks. Now that's what I tought too. But it isn't true, you see they are actually nice and they tell the truth. Funny how I only realised it after that old man showed me his grandfather's watch. So next time they come around just invite them in, they're actually verry freindly people telling nothing but the truth and I've heard they all have nice, golden watches. Strange that they always make them move sidewards tough...
I might do that if they came around every Sunday. Alas, they never venture into my neck of the Dutch rainforest.Quote:
Originally Posted by Wakizashi
And I'm sooo good-looking! https://img235.imageshack.us/img235/...orshockak8.gif
I used to know a couple of Mormons when I studied in Leyden, though. Two young guys living around the corner in a small, tidy terrace house. No sound ever came out of it, no dog ever barked up their lane, the curtains were always open. I often saw them in the Haarlemmerstraat proselytizing among the students.
They were polite, they didn't smell, they gave me a free copy of Da Book (always a good start with Adrian II - and it doesn't have to be free either) and I invited them over one afternoon to talk about it. They were dressed in black suits, white shirts and modest grey ties, their shoes were so shiny that it hurt my eyes and the conversation went absolutely nowhere until I asked them about their home towns. I think they must have been home-sick. They were totally disarming in their modest, soft-spoken way.
awesome
As another Mormon, and one who spent two years straight doing little else, I must say he pulls off a dang good impression. Most of the reactions he got are pretty instantly recognizable to me, too. I wonder if he came away with any more respect for the difficulty of the job. Anyway, definitely the funniest thing I've seen in awhile. I wish he'd found my door while he was here.
And Aenlic, that's absolutely fantastic. I ran into a lot of weird situations, but nothing quite like the welcome you gave your missionaries. Props for the creative awkwardness.
Ajax
I found it rather amusing - to bad no one invited him in for lemonade.
I was surprised to see Mormons thrown in with the JW's and the other thumpers. As I said, my experience in The Netherlands indicated that they were actually very nice and modest people. So?Quote:
Originally Posted by ajaxfetish
Is this because (1) they have changed their preaching ways since the 1970's, or (2) they behave differently abroad, or (3) Adrian is so imposing/good-looking that he has Mormons eating out of his hand?
I also had them ringing my doorbell a couple of times. Most of the time I let them talk and when I saw an opportunity I tried to poke a hole in their reasoning. And they gave me free books and kept coming even when I told I wasn't going to change my mind, which I find interesting to read through for a bit, just for understanding better how they think.
The man was always polite and not irritating at all, a second, female, Jehova Witness always stood at the background. Never invited them though. If I didn't have time I just said so and they went away again.
I'd say it depends mostly on the individual missionary. Some have a lot more forceful personalities, others are much more gentle in their approach (for an easygoing introvert like me, forceful just wasn't going to happen). From my experience ('02-'04), I'd say the majority would probably fit the style of the ones who visited you, Adrian, though there are those who can be very pushy. I personally never liked serving with them much. It's a balance between boldness (trying to make people aware of something most don't want to listen to) and politeness (offending someone isn't going to accomplish anything).Quote:
Originally Posted by Adrian II
Ajax
I've been visited by missionaries from just about any American Church.
And I have to go with others here: they were very polite, the lot of them. A bit too clean-shaven and well-groomed for my liking perhaps, but undeniably of agreeable character and behaviour. Perfect.
Heck, they were so good you'd wish for them to cease their fruitless proselytising and get a real job in sales or something. They'd make loads of money.
Come to think of it, my current French teacher is a former missionary who went to France (mainly around Carcassonne, I believe) for a few years.Quote:
Originally Posted by Louis VI the Fat
Huh. I couldn't imagine that basketball coach-French teacher walking around knocking on people's doors for some reason. :sweatdrop: