How hard is it to please a woman?

[Avicenna]

It's not difficult.

To make a woman happy, a man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
44. give her compliments regularly
45. love shopping
46. be honest (white lies okay)
47. be very rich
48. not stress her out
49. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
50. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
51. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
52. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
53. to never forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes


HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1. Bring him beer
2. Pass the remote

[drone]

[Lemur]

4.Don't get pregnant

Speak for yourself, Mithrandir. I will populate the Earth with a legion of lemurs! My biological army will change history and crush all opposition beneath their collective heel!

[Samurai Waki]

4.Don't get pregnant

Easier said than done, my friend.

[A.Saturnus]

Yeah, it takes a man to please a woman!

[doc_bean]

You just have to find the hidden switch...

[UltraWar]

Speak for yourself, Mithrandir. I will populate the Earth with a legion of lemurs! My biological army will change history and crush all opposition beneath their collective heel!

Gah!

[yesdachi]

Yeah, it takes a man to please a woman!

That’s not what my wife’s girlfriend says!
Waitaminute, what did she mean by that?

[Red Peasant]

You just have to find the hidden switch...

Naughty!

[Lemur]

You just have to find the hidden switch...

I think Chef had something to say about that in the South Park movie ...

[Alexanderofmacedon]

Speak for yourself, Mithrandir. I will populate the Earth with a legion of lemurs! My biological army will change history and crush all opposition beneath their collective heel!

Yeah, but the....-insert action- is like throwing a hot dog down a hallway.

[solypsist]

pretty much make them feel lucky to be with you and the job is done.

the trick is to do the above while at the same time letting her know you're the lucky one

[Beirut]

Sound advice Soly.

Also, if she has kids, buy her a new washer and dryer. Beats Cuba and diamonds any day.

[Papewaio]

You just have to find the hidden switch...

And afterwards you say "See all those video games button flicking has a use!"

[Devastatin Dave]

This thread is sexist and offensive. I'm appalled that members of this forum don't realize the way to please a women is through pregnancy, barefootedness, and preparing meals... oh and taking care of the kids as well!!!

[Avicenna]

pretty much make them feel lucky to be with you and the job is done.

the trick is to do the above while at the same time letting her know you're the lucky one

B-b-but.. how?

[macsen rufus]

@Mithrandir

5. (well this one is obvious).

'obvious' as in .... it involves camels?

[Shaka_Khan]

Could you explain about the camels? Can it be involved with a horse too?

[Dutch_guy]

Could you explain about the camels?

You really don't want to know, really.

[edyzmedieval]

You really don't want to know, really.

How hard can it be, really?

Anyhow, nice thread.
That should cover up your pleasures.

[The Wizard]

It all depends on how many camels you own.

Trust me.

[The Spartan (Returns)]

omgosh. ok back to topic. sometimes i once got them to my erhm.. my

misunderstanding but i.. got for some reason a bit mad. dunno why.

[naut]

Simple to please a woman, as long as your name is Richard Pryor.

[Samurai Waki]

Simple to please a woman, as long as your name is Richard Pryor.

Yeah. if that woman happens to be a necrophiliac

[edyzmedieval]

Women will be pleased by the following guys:

-Dracula
-Osama bin Laden
-Edyzmedieval

Simple.

[The Spartan (Returns)]

Women will be pleased by the following guys:

-Dracula
-Osama bin Laden

Simple.

what? these monsters?

[The Wizard]

Osama has many camels, remember!

[GoreBag]

Just stick to number 6.

[naut]

Lol!