Virginity Pledges are NOT effective (yes I know the sky is blue)

[HoreTore]

I once saw somewhere that amongst the people that took the virginity pledge the rate of oral and anal sex was a lot higher than the general population.

Hmmmm...... Care to send a couple of them over here?

On a related thought, what girls/boys don't do oral? that's just rude....

[Mooks]

On a related thought, what girls/boys don't do oral? that's just rude....

Must restrain myself....from putting quote in signature.

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

On a related thought, what girls/boys don't do oral? that's just rude....

Lots, actually, quite a few people don't like doing it and a significant number don't like recieving it either. On relationships, I think Lorenzo has a point (though sooner or later you have to move in and a certain amount of sexual threat seems to be attractive.) Life is complicated.

About the pledge, what this indicates is that people don't take it seriously and many probably don't have a concept of an honourable word. I have a friend working for a charity in Texas right now, she says that a lot of parents use Christianity to control their children, which just makes the children two-faced. I also heard that only around 12% of Americans will admit to being atheist, I find that a rather low number when you look at American culture.

Barrack Obama may well be an etheist, for example, the story of his Church attendence seems to suggest that he doesn't obsess about taking communion every Sunday.

[Ronin]

Lots, actually, quite a few people don't like doing it and a significant number don't like recieving it either.

I will accept the first part of that sentence...but the second part seems to be fiction at the very least...

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

I will accept the first part of that sentence...but the second part seems to be fiction at the very least...

I suppose it depends on your partner's competancy, mostly though I think it's a cultural objection. I have heard women in particular say they just don't like the idea. Since it's a cultural objection they've probably never tried it.

[HoreTore]

Gah! No oral sex = less lubed up genitals. And that leads to a sore soldier. I honestly can't imagine having sex without both giving and receiving...

[Lorenzo_H]

I will accept the first part of that sentence...but the second part seems to be fiction at the very least...

Hate to contradict you, but while I have in the past given it (and since regretted it, not because it wasn't enjoyable, but for reasons I have expressed in earlier posts), the number of times I have refused to receive oral sex is more than I can count in my head. I am male, before you ask. There are certainly a lot of people who don't like receiving it, I know others as well.

The reason I don't do it is because honestly, I hate the idea of reducing a girl to that. I would feel almost bestial. I wouldn't feel good about making a girl I like do me such a menial favour. The amount of girls I have known who were abused by that whole system of thinking and the whole cycle and culture is very painful for me to recall. Who knows, maybe I shall do it in future, hopefully when I am committed to someone for life.

[rasoforos]

The reason I don't do it is because honestly, I hate the idea of reducing a girl to that. I would feel almost bestial. I wouldn't feel good about making a girl I like do me such a menial favour.

Its good to have a clear cut idea of why you do/dont want to do something. However I do not understand why you would feel this way.

Why should you think that a girl is 'reduced' by giving oral sex?

There is no 'shame' in sex. Two adults agree to have fun and as long as they both enjoy anything goes. Society fills us with all that 'shame' mumbo jumbo when we are young.

Why is it a menial favour? Your partner wants to do something to please you and sometimes pleasing your other half without expecting something in return is much better than the greatest sex ever. Its Altruistic and not menial.

As far as 'bestial' . Far from it, its very human, no animal does it ( I think)

[Ronin]

Its good to have a clear cut idea of why you do/dont want to do something. However I do not understand why you would feel this way.

Why should you think that a girl is 'reduced' by giving oral sex?

There is no 'shame' in sex. Two adults agree to have fun and as long as they both enjoy anything goes. Society fills us with all that 'shame' mumbo jumbo when we are young.

Why is it a menial favour? Your partner wants to do something to please you and sometimes pleasing your other half without expecting something in return is much better than the greatest sex ever. Its Altruistic and not menial.

As far as 'bestial' . Far from it, its very human, no animal does it ( I think)

Quoted....For.....Truth....

[Gawain of Orkeny]

Neither are contraceptives. Only partially. The same for head start. But it 0 effect after a few years. Now I hear the FEDS want to make pre school mandatory.

[Lorenzo_H]

Its good to have a clear cut idea of why you do/dont want to do something. However I do not understand why you would feel this way.

Why should you think that a girl is 'reduced' by giving oral sex?

There is no 'shame' in sex. Two adults agree to have fun and as long as they both enjoy anything goes. Society fills us with all that 'shame' mumbo jumbo when we are young.

Why is it a menial favour? Your partner wants to do something to please you and sometimes pleasing your other half without expecting something in return is much better than the greatest sex ever. Its Altruistic and not menial.

As far as 'bestial' . Far from it, its very human, no animal does it ( I think)

Ever since a guy who forced a girl, who I am good friends with, to do it, I cannot even contemplate it. I guess my mentality is very particular, because of my own experiences; I just don't want to remind any girl of that kind of guy. I have a fixation that by doing it, it will give the impression, subconciously, that I am with the girl only for physical action, and that her worth to me is determined by that.

[rasoforos]

Ever since a guy who forced a girl, who I am good friends with, to do it, I cannot even contemplate it. I guess my mentality is very particular, because of my own experiences; I just don't want to remind any girl of that kind of guy. I have a fixation that by doing it, it will give the impression, subconciously, that I am with the girl only for physical action, and that her worth to me is determined by that.

I understand. It does you credit to be so concerned. However, just because one man is a total , it does not mean that girls will associate you with him. We cannot be held accountable for the sins of the whole male population. I see your point though.


Just a reminded. A woman's mouth is usually filled with razor sharp teeth. More than capable of punishing a guy who feels like forcing oral sex

[Seamus Fermanagh]

I also heard that only around 12% of Americans will admit to being atheist, I find that a rather low number when you look at American culture.

Doesn't surprise me at all. Very few people I know are adamant about declaring the non-existence of God. On the other hand, many aren't very avidly religious. Runs roughly "well, I believe God exists, but I distrust religion so I'll just do my own thing while acknowledging a vague entity called God."

These "unchurched" may be functionally atheists as far as society would feel their impact, but many such would deny the "atheist" label.

[Rhyfelwyr]

a lot of parents use Christianity to control their children, which just makes the children two-faced.

This isn't an issue I hear raised very often, but it has caused me some concern. Maybe I just get too easily freaked out by things, but the talk I hear about 'family values' from US evangelicals is borderline disturbing. It's almost like families are turning into mini-cults; this isn't natural, and it wasn't how the family functioned historically. It does seem to have become quite tied with Christianity, although I can't understand why - the Bible mentions treating your neighbour well more than your family. I can think of a few qoutes off the top of my head, for example Jesus saying he comes to bring the sword of division between families, at one point he even tells us to hate our family before we can come to God through him (although it translates more as love less - getting our priorities right and not being like animals caring only for people based on biological connections), that contradict these views.

[Ronin]

This isn't an issue I hear raised very often, but it has caused me some concern. Maybe I just get too easily freaked out by things, but the talk I hear about 'family values' from US evangelicals is borderline disturbing. It's almost like families are turning into mini-cults; this isn't natural, and it wasn't how the family functioned historically. It does seem to have become quite tied with Christianity, although I can't understand why - the Bible mentions treating your neighbour well more than your family. I can think of a few qoutes off the top of my head, for example Jesus saying he comes to bring the sword of division between families, at one point he even tells us to hate our family before we can come to God through him (although it translates more as love less - getting our priorities right and not being like animals caring only for people based on biological connections), that contradict these views.

there are plenty of people that label themselves as Christian that would be at the top of Jesus **** list if he indeed came back some day....this is hardly news, it has been like this throughout history.

[Megas Methuselah]

I also had a friend who had bible thumping parents. He honestly didn't know that a latex condom was effective in combating STDs. I wanted to cry when he told me this.

You don't have Sex Education in your barbaric land?

[LittleGrizzly]

Im fairly sure almost all americans do... with possibly the exception of one or two states...

I think some parents are allowed to opt thier children out of sex ed, and by kush's description of his parents they possibly could very well had done that...

[HoreTore]

Sex ed or not doesn't matter. The thing is, that you have one group of people saying condoms work, then you have another group of people saying they don't. That will of course lead to some people believing the lie.