News of the Weird

[Sasaki Kojiro]

Point 1: It's customary to avoid political stuff in NotW.
Point 2: You're a day late and a dollar short.
Point 3: You finally deign to post in NotW, and this is what you've got?

Point 4:

[Lemur]

Looks like the phone-sex misprints are running rampant:

Cereal Box Typo Sends Callers To Phone Sex Line

An Oregon company has ordered new packaging for its Peace Cereal after a typo on the box sent callers to a phone sex line instead of the cereal maker's 800 number. Instead of reaching Golden Temple of Oregon, callers were greeted by a recorded voice asking, "Do you love sex? ... Isn't that why you called?"

Spokeswoman Elissa Brown said Eugene, Ore.-based Golden Temple ordered new packaging when the mistake was discovered in December and new boxes have been shipping out for weeks.

[Crazed Rabbit]

Here's one unionizing effort I'm not going to speak out against:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Russian wizards seek trade union

MOSCOW (AFP) – Wizards and psychics accustomed to working in the world beyond want to conjure up a trade union in Russia to manage their earthly employment worries, the daily Nezavisimaya Gazeta reported Friday.

The report, quoting unnamed sources in the Russian parliament, said a group of "psychics, witches and other specialists in contact with supernatural forces" wanted formal status with the main independent trade union federation.

Russia's Federation of Independent Trade Unions would not comment on the reported move, the paper said.

But Vladimir Yegorov, head of Russia's folk medicine association, voiced scepticism that Russia would see an official wizards' union anytime soon.

"Trade unions are necessary where there are employers. But here we have no plants, no faith-healer factories. We have only individual entrepreneurs," Yegorov told the daily.

The report added that Russia's "extrasensory" practitioners -- psychics, faith-healers, witches, magicians and so on -- had reported an increase in their workload in connection with the global economic crisis.

Which is worse; not knowing it was there for 30 years, or not being able to remember how it could have gotten there in the first place?

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Man Coughs Up Nail Stuck In His Nose

Going to the doctor doesn't get any weirder than this.

Prax Sanchez went to a hospital for an MRI. "When I went to lay down on the MRI machine, I had a real pain on my right side under my eye," said Sanchez.

Doctors asked him if he had any kind of metal in his face, perhaps from past procedures, but Sanchez said he wasn't aware of anything. A short time later, Sanchez coughed up the unimaginable, a nail over an inch long.

"I never had any idea there was any metal in my face," said Sanchez.

It turns out, Sanchez had an X-Ray done prior to the MRI. When doctors took another look at those X-Rays, they found that a nail was indeed stuck up his nasal cavity. According to doctors, the magnetic force from the MRI dislodged the nail causing Sanchez to cough it up later.

Sanchez' family doctor, Jamieson Kennedy, determined the nail was up his nose for 30 years. "Once it's in the nasal cavity like that, a little membrane forms around it," said Kennedy

To this day, Sanchez has no idea how that nail made it up his nose.

CR

[rasoforos]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/7982146.stm

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Two ultra-Orthodox Jewish newspapers have altered a photo of Israel's new cabinet, removing two female ministers.

Limor Livnat and Sofa Landver were grouped with the rest of the 30-member cabinet for their inaugural photo.

But Yated Neeman newspaper digitally changed the picture by replacing them with two men. The Shaa Tova newspaper blacked the women out.

Publishing pictures of women is viewed by many ultra-orthodox Jews as a violation of female modesty.

Other Israeli papers reprinted the altered images next to the original photos, with one headlining it "Find the lady".

The ultra-Orthodox community separates itself from mainstream society through its traditional religious practices and distinctive attire of black hats, coats and sidelocks for the men and long skirts and sleeves for the women.

Restrictions include using only Kosher telephones, and not accessing websites with content deemed inappropriate.

A bit political but I love how they did not just deleted the women but added men in their place.

[seireikhaan]

Kosher Telephones?

[Banquo's Ghost]

Kosher Telephones?

Yes, I was bemused by that because I thought the kosher rules were dietary. However, a little research showed me that some Orthodox thought is concerned about animal fats used in metals production, for example.

I guess along the same lines as the concerns raised during the Indian Mutiny, but not quite so, erm, vocal.

[Major Robert Dump]

I recall seeing some tv show in my hotel where a reporter went to a little buisness in Israel, which consisted of a couple of old guys in a garage trying to invent things that didn't violate Orthodox rules, etc, such as telephones that dialed themselves and lawnmowers that were automated, presumably so these items could be used on the Sabbath.

This is the closest I could find, talk about working the loopholes:

http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/936908.html

[Lemur]

Principals Australia calls for pre-school job prep

THE head of Principals Australia believes toddlers in daycare should be given early career counselling to help them work out what they want to be when they grow up. [...] The call was immediately rejected as "crazy stuff" by a leading childcare operator, while the state and territory children's commissioners warned against pushing academic-based teaching on children still in nappies.

But Ms Castine said research showed students as young as six could identify what they wanted to do when they grew up.

[Note: This must be why we have such an oversupply of cowboys, astronauts and princesses.]

[Fragony]

Kosher Telephones?

They have a hole to be curl-friendy

[Fragony]

^-(yes that's hosted)

Teacher arrested for sending erotic pictures to one of her students!

http://blog.nj.com/southjersey_impac...um_Lauren2.jpg
http://blog.nj.com/southjersey_impac...um_Lauren1.jpg

Am I missing anything, isnt that like, totally acceptable by anyones standards?

[Strike For The South]

^-(yes that's hosted)

Teacher arrested for sending erotic pictures to one of her students!

http://blog.nj.com/southjersey_impac...um_Lauren2.jpg
http://blog.nj.com/southjersey_impac...um_Lauren1.jpg

Am I missing anything, isnt that like, totally acceptable by anyones standards?

Why doesn't this stuff happen to me?

[Samurai Waki]

I would be only offended, simply because for one she isn't very attractive, and two... she's not nude either one of them.

[Lemur]

Australian women's breasts expanding at an alarming rate

A defense against octosquids?

The bra market is expanding, literally. Up to 40 per cent of Australian women now buy bras with a cup size of DD or higher, new figures from lingerie suppliers show.

In the 1950s, the most common bra-cup size was a B — three sizes less than a DD.

Modern breasts are getting so large that some bra companies have introduced cup sizes as high as K, The Sunday Telegraph reports.

Experts blame the cleavage boost on obesity, contraceptive pills and artificial hormones.

[Pannonian]

Australian women's breasts expanding at an alarming rate

A defense against octosquids?

The bra market is expanding, literally. Up to 40 per cent of Australian women now buy bras with a cup size of DD or higher, new figures from lingerie suppliers show.

In the 1950s, the most common bra-cup size was a B — three sizes less than a DD.

Modern breasts are getting so large that some bra companies have introduced cup sizes as high as K, The Sunday Telegraph reports.

Experts blame the cleavage boost on obesity, contraceptive pills and artificial hormones.

It just shows that inflation affects every part of society.

[Strike For The South]

Australian women's breasts expanding at an alarming rate

A defense against octosquids?

The bra market is expanding, literally. Up to 40 per cent of Australian women now buy bras with a cup size of DD or higher, new figures from lingerie suppliers show.

In the 1950s, the most common bra-cup size was a B — three sizes less than a DD.

Modern breasts are getting so large that some bra companies have introduced cup sizes as high as K, The Sunday Telegraph reports.

Experts blame the cleavage boost on obesity, contraceptive pills and artificial hormones.

We all know natural and artificial are the same thing!

[Samurai Waki]

As we all know, this is a natural evolution of man's obsession with breasts.

[Gregoshi]

Their cups runneth over...ahhhh men.

[Lemur]

An Actual (Alleged) Dick-Measuring Contest Spawns Lawsuit

Allegations that the CEO of an energy company dropped his pants during a work dinner, tried to force his way into the hotel room of a woman colleague and stole the woman's cell phone in order to place sexual prank calls may be bunk, but at least they've got a bit of punch to them.

The former Chief Operating Officer of Glacial Energy Holdings, Amparo Gasca, is suing her former company in Houston federal court for allegedly creating such a poor and hostile work environment she felt forced to quit. [...]

Gasca claims that her boss, CEO Gary Mole, asked her to organize a dinner at Americas Restaurant on Post Oak with several work colleagues and their wives in August 2007. At the dinner, Gasca claims Mole got drunk and tried to kiss a male co-worker. When Mole's wife told her husband to stop it, Mole said he wanted to see who was "more of a man" and told the male co-worker to pull down his pants. When the man refused, Mole then pulled down his own pants and made lewd comments.

[asilv]

Footballer shown card for breaking wind



A referee showed a footballer the yellow card for conducting himself in an "ungentlemanly" manner by farting while a member of the opposition was taking a penalty.

The Chorlton Villa player was considered to have broken wind deliberately while the goal attempt took place, resulting in a successful retake.

The Villa goalkeeper then branded the referee the "worst he had seen in years" and was promptly sent off, the Manchester Evening News reports. A third player was close on his heels after questioning the earlier decision and being showed the red card.

Despite the row, Villa beat International Manchester 6-4 in the amateur match held in Stretford. The referee described the game as "just a normal day at the office", adding: "No one physically assaulted me and they took the sendings off."

Villa's manager Ian Treadwell said the club had an "exemplary record" before the game. "It was a mistake for any of my team to get involved. The referee has applied the letter of the law to the absolute button. What you would hope for is that there can be room for some common sense as well," he said.

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/odd/a151...king-wind.html

[Hooahguy]

Kosher Telephones?

those are phones that screen the outgoing/incoming calls so that phone sex lines arent reached.

[Fragony]

I would be only offended, simply because for one she isn't very attractive

Mwah, I'd do her. http://blog.nj.com/southjersey_impac...um_Lauren2.jpg

Had worse.

[Lemur]

Man attempts to rape raccoon, gets penis bitten off

A feisty raccoon has bitten off a pervert’s penis as he was trying to rape the animal.

Alexander Kirilov, 44, was on a drunken weekend with pals when he leapt on the terrified – but toothy – fur ball.

“When I saw the raccoon I thought I’d have some fun,” he told stunned casualty surgeons in Moscow.

Now Russian plastic surgeons are trying to restore his mangled manhood.

“He’s been told they can get things working again but they can’t sew back on what the raccoon bit off," said a pal.

“That’s gone forever so there isn’t going to be much for them to work with."

No means no!

[Strike For The South]

Mwah, I'd do her. http://blog.nj.com/southjersey_impac...um_Lauren2.jpg

Had worse.

Ditto

[Lemur]

Mwah, I'd do her. http://blog.nj.com/southjersey_impac...um_Lauren2.jpg

Had worse.

When you were twelve?

Anyway, like the song says, it's not unusual to be loved by anyone ...

[Fragony]

When you were twelve?

Don't get the sexually explicit part, she's just having a drink, and she's sitting on a boat. Have the feeling that nothing is going on here, could be holiday pictures of an outgoing person, just not that smart a move in the current climate. Wouldn't surprise me if she send it to her entire class.

[Rhyfelwyr]

For all the camel fans out there:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/7987720.stm

[The Spartan (Returns)]

Man bites off friend's penis & swallows it:

A friendship between two men turned to tragedy when one bit off and swallowed the penis of the other, resulting in likley loss of liberty for one and the unrecoverable loss of manhood for the other.

Marian Milczarek (53) became embroiled in a fight with his best friend, Wojciech Sowinski,who suffered the loss of his penis, having it bitten off and apparently gulped down by Sowinski in the course of their altercation.

The two men began fighting when an argument over a borrowed trailer escalated into physical violence. According to Milczarek: “[Sowinki] began hitting me with a chain and then pulled down my trousers and started biting. It was agony.”

Medical technology has advanced to the degree that a severed penis can be reattached upon successful recovery of the organ and timely surgery.

However, a subsequent search by police and emergency medical staff failed to yield up the missing male member. Police suspect that Sowinski may have eaten it, having probably consumed it during their fight.

“If we’d had the other bit of his penis we could have sewn it back on,” said Dr Adam Domanasiewicz from the hospital in nearby Trzebnica, where Milczarek is recovering.

Sowinski is now facing a 10 year prison sentence for the assault.

Via Metro.

I see there's a lot of penis news posted above as well.

[InsaneApache]

Oh yea, we like a 'man loses penis' story. At least once a week.

[Vladimir]

Please give me a head's up next time.

[Lemur]

Please give me a head's up next time.

Why, do you feel like you've been getting the shaft?