Why do such nice girls go out with such complete :daisy:s?
[ You can have a legitimate discussion about this without leaning towards a personal attack - Sec ]
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Why do such nice girls go out with such complete :daisy:s?
[ You can have a legitimate discussion about this without leaning towards a personal attack - Sec ]
Because most people would prefer a second hand BMW that has been test driven to a brand new Prius. :coffeenews:
Because their saliva is compatible?
Because he has a bigger package than you.Quote:
Originally Posted by Hooahguy
Touche sir, touche.Quote:
Originally Posted by a completely inoffensive name
How do you know they are nice girls?
I was going to reply in disgust. But, why bother when someone has explained it better than me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Heartless Bitches International
Jerks have generally more confidence. It's as simple as that without going into antropology.
What Peasant Phill and Psycho say, really.
The nice guy is all about self pitty and no confidence. In a way they are as egocentric as the jerk, but are to lazy to try to get some and thus go out hating the world for the fact they don't get any.
Before you can love someone else, you've got to love yourself (and I don't mean your right or left hand). 'The jerk' is very good at that. But of course they are to big of a jerk for long time relationships and the likes.
Mission accomplished.
Thanks for proving my point.Quote:
Originally Posted by Hooahguy
Oh Pooah guy...
Ze jerks are demanding. They want someone and go for it. Women, through ages and definitely still on nature's command, respond to demands. They exist to be picked, chosen, shown off for to date/mate.
Ze women who go after money, cars, or whatever nice guys blame women to be drooling for with a man are yet another example of how nature still is dictating them: Go after the physical environment that will ensure the continuation of your species via the most powerful "vehicle" possible. Of course majority of such women are not dreaming of having babies with those guys but the rule of the attraction still is there administering women subliminally.
Ze jerks are playful, chaotic, demanding and in most cases polygamic which ensures the female of his must-be manly qualities seeing he had attracted other females already.
Ze nice guys always bear the habit of "oh how would she react to this ? may she think i'm an :daisy:, oh boy, better be keeping it as where I am now" aaaaaand...Tada ! Ze jerk is the winner.
The physical beauty of women generally rings bells of innocence and a sturdy will to stay so whereas women hardly fall under such characteristics.
9 cents. :bow:
women don't go for jerks, some girls may confuse and conflatre aggresive bravado as confidence but women don't tend to date jerks,
However one can be confident and assertive without being a jerk.
I would imagine it'd be a fantasy of 'taming' a wild boy.
That's horse rubbish, Psychonaut's post is bulletproof: all about confidence...
Strike is right. You can be "nice" and still have self confidence. There is difference between an egomaniac and someone with healthy self esteem.
It hasn't changed for the thousands of years we have had society. Phaophtet in ancient Egypt still got all the girls. It wasn't that he was a jerk or that he treated other people like crap it was because he had balls the size of the Pyramids of Giza. Confidence = subconscious desire of women to want to be with you. Reverse applies usually as well. Like overly submissive and meek girls turn me off since I'm loud and social. If you act like you deserve to be with a woman even when shes more attractive than she will just think that you are an equal and deserve her. Plus an individual has to follow a swing till you connect policy. There is no striking out you can take a swing as often as you want. The only thing holding someone back is themselves.
Actually, it's more about this part:Quote:
Originally Posted by Arjos
Quote:
If your goal is to 'get' a girl, and you're trying to accomplish it by being a nice guy, you are being very inefficient. If your goal is to form long-lasting relationships with people you care about, and possibly have a romantic relationship with them, well, kindness is a quality to cultivate.
It's about motivation, really.
I replied about what girls look for :)
Eh, it's been done before Hooah. :snobby:
Why would you care if they date jerks? Keep looking for the "right" girl and you be OK!
How's that working out for you?Quote:
Originally Posted by ELITEKWARMAN8GINGYBREADMENMILK
Got some prospects. :yes:Quote:
Originally Posted by Drunk Clown
Don't we all.Quote:
Originally Posted by ELITEKWARMAN8GINGYBREADMENMILK
This is actually an extremely complicated question and isn't applicable to all women. But for at least some women, they're not just attracted to confidence, but they're also turned off by the appearance of being desperate. Whether you're on the 5th date with a girl you're seriously interested in, or just trying to hook up with some girl you see at a bar, if the lady senses that you're willing to do whatever it takes to have her, that can be a serious turn off.
Contrary to popular belief, most women don't want to be the center of your effort and attention. They want to be with someone who has life goals and ambitions beyond getting a woman. If they (women) sense that they are the most important thing to you, they lose interest fast (unless they are extremely needy and lacking in self-esteem). Most women want to be with someone who is capable of rejecting them, at least initially. If the relationship turns into love, their expectations will change; but when first getting to know a guy, a woman wants someone who is attentive and interested in them, but not desperate for them.
Obviously, the male's self-confidence is going to play into this a lot, but it's not just about that. Hope this helps.
Most overdone topic on the webz after catsQuote:
Originally Posted by Reenk Roink
Plus 'nice guy' tends to have a pretty specific meaning from what I understand... is it not the guys that just become casual friends with girls when they hope it will turn into more?
That's not even a nice thing to do, its a bit deceitful.
Note jerks will not have great relationships most of the time, but they'll have one night stands.
The kind and confident guy will have those however. The sad but nice guy rarely does too, but will not get the one night stand.
However if a girl really likes you from the get go, it all may not matter either. But those moments are very rare.
Showing kindness, respect, and a desire to build caring long term relationships is it's own reward. None of us can control our feelings, but we can control how we think. Holding someone elses feelings, or in this case, lack of romantic feelings, against them is selfish.
well, it's quite weird, but it was indeed ironic
(just try to be a jerk a bit, after get a girl, back to yer good natured originals then)
A must read for "Nice Guys" for a greater understanding:
Do not click if easily offended
Explains the subject title of "Why do nice girls date guys who are jerks?" within the content as well.
Lately I tried not to be a nice guy and that girl hasn't spoken to me in three weeks, just saying.
You couldn't even do that ? >:|Quote:
Originally Posted by Husar
*force-facepalms himself so the action never ends*
Faceplam + this musicQuote:
Originally Posted by LeftEyeNine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZB6WXDuM1g
What? Obviously it worked quite well. :laugh4:Quote:
Originally Posted by LeftEyeNine
Maybe the jerks aren't really jerks and the "nice guys" are just jealous :shrug:
It's not my fault that I have a fantastic personality, look good, have an excellent sense of humour, am good at conversations, have a good paying job, refined taste and a superior intellect :smug:
Somebody has to be the alpha male :smug:
"Jerks" is the word that shy guys use to describe guys with a lot of self-confidence. Women, in general, prefer confident men. Grow a pair, stop being awkward, and get out there and be social. If you do, you'll find you'll have no difficulty in getting the attention of women. Then all the shy guys can call you a jerk and you won't care because you've got a date.
Though there is the whole mannerism though, I am going to be brief on the details but this girl called me a puritan once because I didn't make references to my manhood or sex constantly. Then they started dating some one who kept messaging her things about wanting her to drink from a pot of "sperm tea" and cover her buns in "icing" at least 3 times a day. I don't consider myself the one who lost out there.
It isn't the case of a collective grouping of women being assaulted by two sets of guys known as the jerks and the niceguys. There is massive variation in personalities and personality differences.
This is absolutely true. My post was a generalization, as the OP was itself a generalization.Quote:
Originally Posted by Beskar
yeah that just sounds like someone with a semen fetish. im imagining someone saying all that with some form of a british accent...... funnier that way lol.
also. clever link i chuckled.
Personally i'm very open sexually and not very shy about it since its something the majority of my peers make a priority in their lives so why not talk about it lol. While I am about as far from a prude as you possible I don't go around saying things like your man beskar....... thats beyond disrespectful it just sounds creepy.....
Speak for yourselfQuote:
Originally Posted by Beskar
Methinks Hooahguy has more than a touch of the green-eyed monster. Although I in my infinite wisdom and maturity, at least in relation to Frontroom threads about teh crazy wimmenz, am able to to exactly identify everything that is wrong with Hooah's sentiment, HBI put it far better than I would ever be able to:
Quote:
I get letters from self-professed Nice Guys, complaining that women must WANT to be treated like ****, because THEY, the "Nice Guy" have failed repeatedly in relationships. This is akin to the false logic that "Whales are mammals. Whales live in the sea. Therefore, all mammals live in the sea."
If you have one bad relationship after another, the only common denominator is YOU. Think about it.
What's wrong with Nice Guys? The biggest problem is that most Nice Guys (tm) are hideously insecure. They are so anxious to be liked and loved that they do things for other people to gain acceptance and attention, rather than for the simply pleasure of giving. You never know if a Nice Guy really likes you for who you are, or if he has glommed onto you out of desperation because you actually paid some kind of attention to him.
...
This ultimately boils down to the fact that Nice Guys don't like themselves. Is it any wonder women don't like them? In order to truly love someone else, you must first love yourself. Too often Nice Guys mistake obsession for "love". You don't have to be an ego-inflated, arrogant jerk. You just have to LIKE yourself. You have to know what you want out of life, and go after it. Only then will you be attractive to the kind of woman with whom a long-term relationship is possible.
Mildly NSFW - http://www.heartless-bitches.com/ran...niceguys.shtml
Yeah, I'm a Good Guy, not a Nice Guy - I can be rude and abrasive at the best of times - but I have come to accept that I am incapable of forming relationships with women on an intimate level.Quote:
Originally Posted by Subotan
Hooah should do the same.
I quote:
"Get this Guys: INSECURITY ISN'T SEXY. IT'S A TURNOFF."
Yup, that is what I don't get. Sure, there is a time and place for sexual remarks but when it is in the middle of the afternoon or at some civilized hour, you don't spam a girls telephone with those sort of comments.Quote:
Originally Posted by Centurion1
On that note, don't answer a girls phone for her especially when they get sent such messages. I did once accidentally and well, that is how I know those messages were sent.
Extrapolation:Quote:
Originally Posted by Subotan
Quote:
Women are turned off by the nice guy. While most healthy women don’t want someone who is going to be mean to them, there’s a difference between being kind and being a disgusting wussy.
In my first relationship, I was a disgusting wussy. You know that guy, the one who says “Is everything okay with you? Are you sure? Are you really really sure?”
He avoids conflict at all costs. He wants everything to be smooth. Not only does this person lack honesty in the relationship, but he lacks all backbone and any thoughts and feelings of his own. He’s a wet blanket, not a person.
I was the nice nice nice guy. And I also had huge approach anxiety. These two are related.
Part of approach anxiety is a strong tendency to avoid conflict. You don’t want to BOTHER the girl. You wouldn’t be able to handle it if you did something to make her not like you.
Or if, God forbid, you creeped her out? It would take you weeks to get over it.
It doesn’t take a brain surgeon to realize that relationships are about two independent people coming together out of strength rather than out a of desire to feel good about helping some other person.
Being super nice can kill attraction in seconds. Attraction is based on a push/pull. A bit of teasing. Show the girl that you are willing to lose her. Make her take responsibility for her half of the interaction. She wants to be challenged!
Instead, the nice guy wears insecurity on his sleeve without knowing it. He sees it as a badge of honor for why he doesn’t succeed with women. He clings to it to cover the pain of failure.
It’s good to be nice to women. But hoping that meekness will attract women is a fallacy. Niceness on this magnitude is read by women as overcompensation for not having balls. It is overcompensation for not being willing to take true risks.
Most of this insecurity stems from being socialy retarded. Most men who are perpetually single are
1. Terribly out of shape
2. Unable to carry on a conversation
3. Unpresentable in polite company
All of this other stuff is really inconsequntial and moot conidering if you can't connect with people
Aesthetics only assist in opening and increasing your margin of error.Quote:
Originally Posted by Strike For The South
Well what else is there son?Quote:
Originally Posted by Psychonaut
Even easier: there are people who would rather be sorry they did, and there are those who'd rather be sorry they didn't. One of them will get the girl.
Closing?Quote:
Originally Posted by Strike For The South
COFFEE IS FOR CLOSERSQuote:
Originally Posted by Psychonaut
and I wonder if "Green" actually read this thread :D
https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showt...-called-a-slut
and then this
just recently, from FB, PI being listed as "single" again, you can look on his FB page
Because if you're always available and willing to drop anything to be with a girl, and she knows it, you get put at the bottom of the list. If she thinks that she only has one chance to get you, because you act like a jerk who doesn't need them, then they will want to go out with you right then.
For the same reason as I don't smother one of my little brothers with love: he's the only one who always hugs me goodnight and tells me he loves me and everything (7 year old), but because he's so readily available and will do it anytime, it doesn't mean that much to me. Whereas the 5 year old brother almost never does any of the above, so its alot better.
Basically you have to not let them know that you give a damn about them until after you start dating, and then you can be a bit nicer.
I've found that at least in high school, almost the only time being just a nice guy will land you a girl is if you're the rebound and you listen to all their crap and make them feel good. But rebounds are always short and usually pretty meaningless, in-between periods for her and you'll end up getting hurt (and no, I won't make a thread about how I was Green's rebound til today)
EDIT:
I was told that I was previously in the OP? I'd like to know what it said exactly? I don't care if it's a personal attack or not Sec, I'm really curious though
well, always being available and nice maybe works for that....
so, its true for most girls then? I wonder if the reverse is also true
the reverse being that most jerk girls go for nice guys? or that always available and nice girls are in the same light as their guy counterparts?
then this mean you should go find a jerk girl in your school :clown:Quote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
So:
1.:laugh:
2. CuteWolf webstalks PI.
3. :laugh:
you could webstalks him too :evil: just add him on FB http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001603097354 (hell, he said this on his sig!)Quote:
Originally Posted by Montmorency
Or, maybe, they just don't want to pursue a sexual relationship with you.Quote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
GEE WHAT A DIFFICULT CONCEPT TO UNDERSTAND.
For the same reason as totally irrelevant analogyQuote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
When exactly did PI make the transition from receiving to giving advice in the archetypal frontroom thread? Because I was think he was far, far too quick to do so.Quote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
Protip: No life experience you gain from high school other than learning how to have non-sexual friendships with girls will be of any use to you, ever.Quote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
WHEYYYYYYYYQuote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
This is Classical Frontroom. Unfortunately, I ran out of popcorn by the twelfth post.Quote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
No, it's because of a little phenomenon called CONFIRMATION BIASQuote:
the reverse being that most jerk girls go for nice guys? or that always available and nice girls are in the same light as their guy counterparts?
Guys over complicate women so much, that frustrates me more than the females themselves. Know what you want. Be upfront with the girl and let her know what you want. If she can't provide it, then move on. If no one can provide it, lower your standards. Not that hard people. Also, it isn't that hard to separate the chaff from the wheat when it comes to the intelligence of females you comes across. The self esteem lacking bimbos reveal themselves pretty fast just as the intelligent strong women do.
You do know that you're on a war game forum, home to the socially incompetent and those who already married years ago? Good advice thoughQuote:
Originally Posted by a completely inoffensive name
Karma, you have to love it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Prussian to the Iron
Dude what are you doing, this isn't the place for sincere/serious adviceQuote:
Originally Posted by a completely inoffensive name