News of the Weird

[Gregoshi]

A 32-year-old man who dumped a blow-up doll and sex toys at the side of the road has been fined £75.

Trashy trash. Go figure.

[Divinus Arma]

Crazy news story. Supposedly a black guy was elected the President of the United States? Ha! That can't be right, can it?

[Lemur]

Crazy news story. Supposedly a black guy was elected the President of the United States? Ha! That can't be right, can it?

No, that was just a story in The Onion.

Carrying a majority of the popular vote, Obama did especially well among women and young voters, who polls showed were particularly sensitive to the current climate of everything being ******. Another contributing factor to Obama's victory, political experts said, may have been the growing number of Americans who, faced with the complete collapse of their country, were at last able to abandon their preconceptions and cast their vote for a progressive African-American.

Citizens with eyes, ears, and the ability to wake up and realize what truly matters in the end are also believed to have played a crucial role in Tuesday's election.

[Lemur]

British hens' eggs are exploding due to hot air balloons. No, really.

Hens are dropping dead on a free-range farm because hot-air balloons and low-flying aircraft are causing their eggs to explode inside them, it has been claimed.

Abbi Vincent-Lloyd said she lost 30 hens on days when balloons were flying low over her Herefordshire farm.

She claimed the stress of seeing the enormous balloons overhead caused them to run for cover.

It is as they desperately try to find shelter that they bump into each other or their surroundings, exploding the eggs inside them, she said. [...]

She said: "I had lost about 15 birds when I decided to have the vet do a post mortem on two of them.

"I told the vet about the hot-air balloons and jets flying low over the farm and straight away he said that was the cause.

"As soon as the gas is released to raise the balloon they go absolutely crazy.

"It is absolute chaos, when they go into anything and that causes the egg to explode inside them.

[Gregoshi]

"As soon as the gas is released to raise the balloon they go absolutely crazy.

Wow. A release of gas that kills in a way unexpected...

[Marshal Murat]

Something just cracks inside them, sending them running headless and heedless of their ballooned fears, exaggerated in their fowl minds.

[Lemur]

Teen Compacted In Wisconsin Garbage Truck, Survives

Police in Milwaukee say a teenage boy has survived after being accidentally dumped into the back of a recycling truck and compacted.

Police say the 14-year-old ran away from a boot camp-style school for teens Monday and hid in a recycling bin filled with cardboard.

The bin was picked up by a Waste Management truck and dumped into the vehicle's rear compactor.

Waste Management spokeswoman Lynn Morgan says the truck continued on its collection route, compacting cardboard several times.

The boy wasn't discovered until the truck dumped its load at a recycling processing center.

He was semiconscious and was taken to a hospital, but police say his injuries aren't life-threatening.

[spmetla]

Sounds like he just wanted a hug.

[ShadesPanther]

Sounds like he just wanted a hug.

It's not his fault he got boxed in though.

[InsaneApache]

Well when push comes to shove we are all feeling the pinch.

[KarlXII]

Such a crushing realization to the dangers of recycling. ALast, we have yet to see the company squeezed into a trashy situation.

[Lemur]

Woman runs a mile with rabid fox gnawing her arm

Authorities in Arizona say a jogger attacked by a rabid fox ran a mile with the animal's jaws clamped on her arm and then drove herself to a hospital. The Yavapai County sheriff's office said the woman told deputies she was on a trail near Prescott on Monday when the fox attacked and bit her foot.

She said she grabbed the fox by the neck when it went for her leg but it bit her arm.

The woman wanted the animal tested for rabies so she ran a mile to her car with the fox still biting her arm, then pried it off and tossed it in her trunk and drove to the Prescott hospital.

The sheriff's office says the fox later bit an animal control officer. He and the woman are both receiving rabies vaccinations.

[Gregoshi]

Woman runs a mile with rabid fox gnawing her arm

Foxtrot Oscar Xray Yankee. Lima Alpha Delta Yankee.

[Banquo's Ghost]

I offer this story in the interests of scientific endeavour - to wit; whether the combined ingredients of foreigners, socialism, universal healthcare, transexual rights and prosthetic wangs will finally make Devastatin' Dave's head spin round and explode like a Catherine wheel doused in petrol.



(I leave it to Greg to find a suitable title for the story...)

[spmetla]

I still find it weird people can change sex at the governments expense. Weirder still that the government is regulating whether or not they'll pay for 'wood.'

[Banquo's Ghost]

Weirder still that the government is regulating whether or not they'll pay for 'wood.'

You think they should go soft on the taxpayer?

[Gregoshi]

You think they should go soft on the taxpayer?

Hardly.

[Lemur]

Maybe I'm just tired, but I've read this twice and I still can't make sense of it.

Locksmith call leads to naked push-ups, gunfire, arrests

[Gregoshi]

Maybe I'm just tired, but I've read this twice and I still can't make sense of it.

Locksmith call leads to naked push-ups, gunfire, arrests

Um, Little was exercising his right to bare arms (legs, buttocks, etc)?

[Hosakawa Tito]

Maybe I'm just tired, but I've read this twice and I still can't make sense of it.

Locksmith call leads to naked push-ups, gunfire, arrests

Reporters shouldn't smoke crack till after they have finished their work. Hoo-boy

[spmetla]

You think they should go soft on the taxpayer?

Guess you're right, sorta forgot that Sweden has national health care.

[Hosakawa Tito]

I can do that with my eyes closed.

Don't try this at home, kids, leave it to a professional.

[Conqueror]

Priests Brawl At Jerusalem Church

The faithful kicked, punched and lashed out at each other with candles at the revered spot where Christians believe Jesus was buried and resurrected.

Several followers were left with black eyes, bruises and cuts as priests tried to tear their rivals' robes off in the brawl.

[Crazed Rabbit]

Proof that the Middle East drives everyone crazy.

CR

[KarlXII]

Priests Brawl At Jerusalem Church

The fist of God did it's work....a long with a few others.

[Lemur]

Elderly woman found living with corpses of three siblings

The bodies of three elderly siblings thought to have been dead "for some time" were discovered Friday in a home where a fourth sibling also lived in a quiet Evanston neighborhood, police said.

A preliminary investigation showed no signs of foul play, said police Cmdr. Thomas Guenther, adding that the bodies were found in different parts of the rambling, two-story home, and that some were covered with blankets.

"They all could have passed away on different time periods over a period of time," Guenther said. "That has to be determined." [...]

The resident, who is cooperating with police, is "upwards of 90 years of age" and has been taken to a nearby facility for care, he said.

Neighbors said that they had not noticed anything unusual at the home. Most often, they said they saw a woman they knew as Margaret tending her garden. Last week, she was giving out Halloween candy, said Caroline Carlton, who lives across the street.

[CountArach]

Hugo Chavez plays to his bass

[Hosakawa Tito]

Tough economic times call for stiff measures . Bungle in the jungle time, and you won't even need a suitcase.

[Hosakawa Tito]

Do it for the children. Don't miss church this week folks, maybe they'll make it a game show.

[Conqueror]

Canada frees man too big for jail

Canadian authorities have released a prisoner known as Big Mike who was found to be too fat to fit in his cell.