The Scourge of Ephesus [Concluded]

[Askthepizzaguy]

vote: Tiberius of the Drake

for voting when it is nighttime.


unvote: Tiberius of the Drake

[Thermal]

vote: Tiberius of the Drake

for voting when it is nighttime.


unvote: Tiberius of the Drake

enjoying nighttime ATPG?

[Jolt]

Vote: Sigurd

He has a suspicious name.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Vote: Sigurd

He has a suspicious name.

No, no, no... it's nighttime.

Everyone pays attention in this game, or they don't sign up for the next one.

[Askthepizzaguy]

enjoying nighttime ATPG?

Yes, yes I am. I have a role too, I'm the detective. That's right, I'm claiming detective on night one so the mafia can murder me and win the game easily. And everyone knows I play ballsy, so as stupid as this is, I probably am the detective too.

I applaud your vigilance, Ares, but in all seriousness, at least let me up before you start giving me the eye of suspicion.

[Thermal]

uhhh....ok then....

[TinCow]

Yes, yes I am. I have a role too, I'm the detective. That's right, I'm claiming detective on night one so the mafia can murder me and win the game easily. And everyone knows I play ballsy, so as stupid as this is, I probably am the detective too.

You're lying. I'm the detective.

[Askthepizzaguy]

You're lying. I'm the detective.

Cool! Then we can run off and be private detectives together!

grabs TinCow's hand and skips off into the sunset, gaily swinging their clasped hands to and fro, through a meadow of wildflowers and rainbows and peacocks.

Two private detectives, yes... we're just a couple of private dicks.

Wait... allow me to rephrase that...

[TinCow]

I don't believe you. My role PM tells me you're lying:

Detective

You are the detective.

During the night, you detect.

During the day, you have to avoid getting lynched by the stupid townies. You won't, though, because they're stupid. If you're lucky, you'll manage to detect a mafioso and reveal it to the town. Too bad for you they won't believe you and they'll lynch you anyway, making sure to never lynch the mafioso you revealed to them. Stupid jerks.

When all mafiosi and other bad guys are lynched or killed, you get to be vindicated and say "I told you so."

Good luck (you'll need it)

Andres.

Oh, and ATPG is lying.

[Reenk Roink]

Given that the Reenkmeister is exceptionally powerful this game (he warmly sends his regards to Andres and destiny and probability ) he is exceedingly confident in being able to singlehandedly facilitate a glorious victory for whichever party he fancies more at any given time. Furthermore, he will not rely on the base methods of killing and voting which he has demonstrated to possess absolutely no efficacy whatsoever in relation to his awe inspiring powers, and thus he abstains, courteously.

Let it be known that the Reenkmaistro with his new elated status sees fit to bring two relics of that past which were met with much enmity before: The List and The Fan Club. Hopefully they have become more palatable to the ones not as fortunate as Reenkazoid, as this time, they will have a manifest impact.

[CountArach]

Reenk's role is apparently to refer to himself in the third person with various suffices applied to the end of his name.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Wait until the sun rises in the east to abstain, courteously, says I, courteously.



And how did you know about my cape? Did my split personality come in here yet?

*twirls his evil mustache*

Ahahahahaaaaa!!!!

*hides behind his evil fake supertownie cape and transforms into a classic villain stereotype which I am far too lazy to imagine and describe, so instead, I'll just think of cookies.*

[Askthepizzaguy]

Here's my actual role PM:

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Supertownie Detective Roleblocker Vigilante Invincible Man-o-Steel Man with Nipples of the Future

You are the most Godlike townie ever, and all the ladies seem to like you, even though your obscenely revealing tights and constant trips to the public baths show you to have alternative predilections.

(No, they don't, Andres... stop saying that!)

During the day, you don't have to bother voting, because you can investigate everyone in the game during the first night and pick off anyone you please. If you like, o great Master Pizzaguy, you can end this game right now and make all the other townies serve your every, every whim. You are invulnerable to direct contact with a nuclear blast, are lynch/vigilante/murderproof, can become invisible at will, even to Moderators like me, and can bat stray bullets away from your face with your elongated Nipples of the Future, which have psychic powers.

When all mafiosi and other bad guys are lynched or killed, you win the game. Or, if you prefer, you can just declare a town victory right now. Would you like your trophy?

I made cookies for you so you won't hit me again.

Good luck, loverloins!



Andres.

I do believe you owe me an apology, TinCow.

[ULC]

Hmph, your all cowards! I know each one of you is really a mafia, I'm the only townie ingame - YOU THERE! Yes you, Delivery Boy, put the pizza down slowly! I know what your up too! And you too! Posing as nobility! Nothing noble about your ilk! HA! You, stop with the foolish disguise, everyone knows cows are not detectives, they are lawyers! And you, yes you, yes you! You who's name reminds me of rest and relaxation - YOUR MAD, DELUSIONAL, CRAZY, LOONEY!

AHAHAHAA! I vote: everyone else but me! I've got you all! You mafia can't escape me now!