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Thread: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

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    Future USMC Cobra Pilot Member Prussian to the Iron's Avatar
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    Default Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    This has been the joke going around the Marine base here for the last couple weeks. Some new, several minute long, extremely dramatized National Guard commercial makes it look like National Guards are on-par with special forces, and the music sounds like Carmina Burana (SP?) composed it.


    anyone else seen this commercial? I primarily see it at movie theaters, and when we do I always turn to my companion there and say "lets go sign up for the National Guard!" jokingly. god, i'm so tired of these army, air force, and national guard commercials that try make them look like the hugest badasses, and fail epicly. like the air force commercials where they control a sattelite, using thrusters to dodge debris, or where the guys on like Mars are radioing in for help with enemy snipers.

    over-dramatized. over-commercialized. over-the federal spending budget cuz they feel like national guard is so important they wanna waste money for every movie theatre in america to be commercializing it. gah!!!!
    Last edited by Prussian to the Iron; 02-15-2010 at 03:06.
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    Member Centurion1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    lol i live on a base, too. there is just as much disdain. i do enjoy the marine commercials there. if anything they have modesty.

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    Guest Aemilius Paulus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Centurion1 View Post
    if anything they have modesty.
    *bursts out chuckling after being unable to contain the guffaws*

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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    *bursts out chuckling after being unable to contain the guffaws*
    oh ye of little faith.

    let me put it this way. My father spent 20 years in the USN as an officer. He prefers the marine corp and calls them the real military.
    i dont want to repeat what he says about the navy sometimes.

  5. #5
    Nobody expects the Senior Member Lemur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    <--- Son of a Marine officer. I can't repeat the things he had to say about the Navy on a PG board, but let us say they were colorful. At least the Air Force was merely the Chair Force, which isn't nearly as bad.

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    Guest Aemilius Paulus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Centurion1 View Post
    oh ye of little faith.
    Well, the Marine commercials strike me as a bit of a mind

    Cool music, cool blokes doing cooler things with badass weaponry... Gawd, it reeks of teen appeal... The only thing it lacks is scantily clad chicks. But I am sure the Corps will take care of that soon. Remember that IDF Girls Maxim photoshoot? Well, yeah, only this time, guess who goes next?

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    Member Centurion1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    have you seen them that army and navy and air force.

    the marines mostly have actual marines doing rifle drill.

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    Arena Senior Member Crazed Rabbit's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Centurion1 View Post
    i do enjoy the marine commercials there. if anything they have modesty.
    Back in my day, when we only had 28.8kbps modems and 100 MHz CPUs, and we had to watch ads on TV because 100 pixel pictures took five minutes to load, they were anything but:


    As for the grandiose Nat'l Guard commercial, do ye speaketh o' this one?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbfPj00pTNY

    CR
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Back in my day, when we only had 28.8kbps modems and 100 MHz CPUs, and we had to watch ads on TV because 100 pixel pictures took five minutes to load, they were anything but:
    psh im only on a 50.66 kbps connection dont give me that line.

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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    WAIT I JUST FOUND A SEVERE PROBLEM! WHY ARE YOU AT THE MOVIES WITH MEN!

    it appears its time for another girl thread my dear pi.

  11. #11
    Future USMC Cobra Pilot Member Prussian to the Iron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Crazed Rabbit View Post
    Back in my day, when we only had 28.8kbps modems and 100 MHz CPUs, and we had to watch ads on TV because 100 pixel pictures took five minutes to load, they were anything but:
    lol! thats...weird. seems like it was almost a commercial for the first terminator or something.

    As for the grandiose Nat'l Guard commercial, do ye speaketh o' this one?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbfPj00pTNY

    CR
    yep, thats the one. ill link it in the first post.



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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    dont worry ill protect you now that i know your military (we gotta stick together, neh?)

    sfts is really a big softie all he wants is a love for texas and a certain frenchman.

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    Old Town Road Senior Member Strike For The South's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Cool down?
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    i think he thinks your hot......

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    Old Town Road Senior Member Strike For The South's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Centurion1 View Post
    i think he thinks your hot......
    Quit projecting on PI
    There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford

    My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.

    I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.

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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    heehee.

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    Philologist Senior Member ajaxfetish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Prussian Iron View Post
    and the music sounds like Carmina Burana (SP?) composed it.
    Your spelling's fine, but Carmina Burana's not a dude's name. It's the name of the composition. Composer's name is Carl Orff.

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    Coffee farmer extraordinaire Member spmetla's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    As an Army National Guard Officer I'll say that I've always been annoyed by our commercials as well. If we got to do even half of what is advertised I wouldn't mind it but heck, even my State's lack of funding means that most weekend drills are spent at the armory cleaning weapons and conducting all the briefings that Army requires annual, quarterly, etc. Eight years ago when I signed up at least there was money available for training in the field with actual ammo instead of just yelling bang bang and more than just one annual live fire run.

    Seeing as we're just a more localized system of Reservist there shouldn't be any advertising, recruiters and the people transfering from active duty work well enough already. Besides, if that commercial is capable of making someone want to join the Army National Guard then I'd rather not have him in my unit.

    That being said, I think the Army has bad commercials in general, Army of One?, Army Strong?, I still think that be all you can be was better.

    Funny recruiting commercials:
    Austrian:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFDdg760kdc

    Ukrainian:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4a01PpeoK8
    Last edited by spmetla; 02-15-2010 at 07:02.

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    Member Megas Methuselah's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Lotsa boy-love in this thread.

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    Iron Fist Senior Member Husar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by spmetla View Post
    Just wanted to post that.
    also, the Austrians recently made a cheap copy of it:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99qUW_9m0eY


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    Future USMC Cobra Pilot Member Prussian to the Iron's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Megas Methuselah View Post
    Lotsa boy-love in this thread.
    dont ask dont tell, Meth. dont ask dont tell...
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    Nobody expects the Senior Member Lemur's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by spmetla View Post
    Tothis day, this remains my favorite military commercial of all time. There's something abut the glossed-out blonde bringing the tank dude an earthware jug that cracks me up every time.

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    Guest Aemilius Paulus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lemur View Post
    Tothis day, this remains my favorite military commercial of all time. There's something abut the glossed-out blonde bringing the tank dude an earthware jug that cracks me up every time.
    Yeah, but the bloke who translated it was either a lousy Ukrainian speaker or most likely, exaggerating. I speak fluent Ukrainian, and the words do not match, not at all. The meaning is rather distorted. But sheesh, that was one cheesy commercial.

    I wonder how old it is - the music is early 2000s, and even then it was seen something as awkward folk rock... Then again, the commercial makes a point of military service under contract - and IIRC, Ukraine is still using the levy system of all able-bodied 18-year-old males. The general contract bill has yet to be passed into the law. So if we take the legal chronology, the commercial should not be too old.


    The earthenware jug is symbolism, just as the sol' (salt) and kalach' (bread) that the traditionally-dressed girls treat foreign visitors with. I wonder why they stuck it there, though. The commercial does not harken back to the past of Ukraine in any other manner, so sticking in the jug in was oddly anachronistic.


    EDIT: Check out this Austrian recruiting commercial: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99qU...eature=related

    A copy of the Ukrainian one. Did the Ukrainians steal it from the Austrians? Or did the Austrians do the same, but vice versa? Hmmm, why do I have a sneaking suspicion it was the former option...
    Last edited by Aemilius Paulus; 02-15-2010 at 20:18.

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    Iron Fist Senior Member Husar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Aemilius Paulus View Post
    EDIT: Check out this Austrian recruiting commercial: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99qU...eature=related

    A copy of the Ukrainian one. Did the Ukrainians steal it from the Austrians? Or did the Austrians do the same, but vice versa? Hmmm, why do I have a sneaking suspicion it was the former option...
    Well, I know for sure that you stole it from post #20...
    I am rather sure the Austrians stole it from the Ukrainians as the austrian one is rather recent, in fact it caused a bit of a stir earlier this year in austria for being sexist and some minister apoligized for it IIRC.

    Oh and thanks for the explanations on the ukrainian video.


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    Tovenaar Senior Member The Wizard's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    EDIT: Argh, spmetla got there first

    Well then: not really a recruiting video, but still!
    Last edited by The Wizard; 02-15-2010 at 22:42.
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    This thread is ground zero for a Lemur's disease outbreak.
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    Guest Aemilius Paulus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Husar View Post
    Well, I know for sure that you stole it from post #20...
    Oh, so sorry Yeah, I did not check your link... In fact, I somehow seemed to have skipped over your post, despite my unwavering policy to read the whole thread before posting.
    Quote Originally Posted by Husar View Post
    I am rather sure the Austrians stole it from the Ukrainians as the austrian one is rather recent, in fact it caused a bit of a stir earlier this year in austria for being sexist and some minister apoligized for it IIRC.
    Wow, talk about setting new lows, stealing from the Ukrainians ... But 'sexist'? Since when is a story of boys trying to impress girls sexist? I mean, I know about the objectification of women, but this is perfectly natural behaviour.

    EDIT: Just for the record, I hold Ukrainian citizenship as well as Russian, technically, although the reality is quite complicated. Also, I am, crudely speaking, half-Russian and half-Ukrainian, although my mother has strong German as well as Russian roots, and my father has hazy Polish roots in tandem with his main classification as a Ukrainian.
    Last edited by Aemilius Paulus; 02-16-2010 at 00:33.

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    Arena Senior Member Crazed Rabbit's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    That Ukrainian one is the clear standout, but let's not forget the old 80s army commercials, complete with terrible jingles and attempts to sound totally radical;
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebjl...eature=related

    And of course, The Army; where you learn how to become an engineer:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBiG...eature=related

    CR
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  29. #29
    Guest Aemilius Paulus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by spmetla View Post
    That being said, I think the Army has bad commercials in general, Army of One?, Army Strong?, I still think that be all you can be was better.
    Hey! That one was pure stroke of tasteful genius. Proof? This:


    EDIT:
    This 80s commercial is quite effective IMHO, and much more subtle in comparison with the other fodder the Army churns out:

    Admittedly, any person of the average .Org level can see right through this ad, but frankly, the demographic the Army targets is not exactly a fan of Hemingway's writing style...
    Last edited by Aemilius Paulus; 02-16-2010 at 00:43.

  30. #30
    smell the glove Senior Member Major Robert Dump's Avatar
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    Default Re: Let's all join the National Guard!!!

    Army recruiting commercials are bad in general. National Guard commercials are downright idiotic and embarrassing. If you think those are bad, you should see some of t-shirts made on the local and state level. A stryker and a NASCAR racecar whould never be on the same t-shirt.

    That being said, they are aiming for a lower common denominator because they need fresh bodies. Like it or not, the Guard had taken a huge burden in the Iraq war, and our government does not want to pay for that many full-time soldiers. Oddly enough, rather than aiming for a demographic of, say, young people who want to join the military but also enjoy successful civilian jobs, they seem to aim for kids who need money for college and people who thought Shock and Ya'll was a cool name for an album. Of course a lot of people like that join, and turn out to be good soldiers, but the commercials are hihgly insulting to the average person's intelligence and I would hate to think that someone thought it was one of those commercials that got me to join.

    Although I gotta admit, the Marine fighting the giant monster is pretty damn fruity.
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