News of the Weird [Archive] - Page 5

Andres

09-28-2007, 14:37

Forget about the squids, the two-headed turtles are taking over the world! (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070928/ap_on_sc/two_headed_turtle)

Two-headed turtle goes on display in Pa.

NORRISTOWN, Pa. - A pet store has bought a two-headed turtle from a collector and plans to keep it on display, the store manager said. The 2-month-old turtle, actually conjoined red-eared slider twins, fits on a silver dollar.

It has two heads sticking out from opposite ends of its shell, along with a pair of front feet on each side. But there is just one set of back feet and one tail.

The turtle is apparently healthy, and the species can live 15 to 20 years, said Jay Jacoby, manager of Big Al's Aquarium Supercenter in East Norriton. The turtle has not yet been named.

The store would not disclose how much it paid.

The same exotic-turtle collector sold another Big Al's store a conjoined-twin turtle about 20 years ago, Jacoby said. The man lives in Florida, but he declined to identify him.

Fragony

09-28-2007, 14:57

GERMAN WOMAN KICKED OUT OF HER HOUSE BECAUSE OF LOUD SEX

not surprisingly, it's in german

EDIT: Also unsurprisingly, there is nakedness in one of the adverts, so I'm afraid interested parties will have to PM Fragony for the link. BG

oh common, they weren't nearly as bad as the last ones you requested

Gregoshi

09-28-2007, 15:43

Forget about the squids, the two-headed turtles are taking over the world! (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070928/ap_on_sc/two_headed_turtle)
Normally, I'd be concerned due to the close proximity of this beast, however, I suspect I've got plenty of time to get out of town: The Slowskys (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mWJUDuVD5g). :laugh4:

lars573

09-29-2007, 05:53

Russian woman's 12th baby weighs in at 7.75 kg (http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/reuters/070928/world/international_russia_baby_dc)
That's 17.1 lbs for those of you not on the proper metric side of things.

Seriously look at the size of this kid.
http://d.yimg.com/ca.yimg.com/p/070926/reuters/mtfh95371nootri90815860.jpg
Looks like if she gets hungry she's gonna eat one of the other new borns. :inquisitive:

Andres

09-29-2007, 10:49

Forget about the two-headed turtles, here come the alien sheep! (http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_2529529.html)

'Alien' sheep bring them flocking

A flock of 'alien' sheep has become a local attraction in a Romanian village after all 250 turned green overnight.

The owner of the sheep, in the village of Arsa from Constanta county, called the vet to see what was wrong with his animals.

Locals came flocking to see the unusual sight while the local vet took samples from the sheep wool and discovered they had all been treated with a solution of limestone.

The shepherd said he used the solution to help a few animals get rid of a skin disease.

Shepherd Cristinel Florea said: "A few of my sheep got sick one year ago, they got a sort of rash on their skin.

"I tried all sorts of treatments but nothing seemed to work. So I decided to use the limestone and all my sheep look like aliens now."

Vet Grigore Mertoiu said: "Everyone was puzzled at first but then the owner told us he used limestone to treat his sheep.

"The poor animals turned all green during the night because it was a little chilly and they slept very close."

Andres

09-29-2007, 10:59

Man needs license to ride wheelchair. (http://www.politicalgateway.com/news/read/105065)

VENICE, Italy, Sept. 28 (UPI) -- An elderly Italian wheelchair user was told if he wants to travel the streets of Venice, he must register his chair and get a license plate for it.

Traffic police cited 81-year-old paraplegic Pietro Matiz for driving too fast -- a speed-racer pace of 5.4 mph -- along Venice's famed Lido, the Italian news agency ANSA said. Under the law, the top speed is a leisurely 3.6 mph.

"They said I was endangering pedestrians," Matiz told ANSA. "I feel like I'm under house arrest now I can't use it."

What makes the situation worse, he said, was that officials never did anything about the 2005 law "even though they knew it would cause problems."

Gregoshi

09-29-2007, 16:07

Man needs license to ride wheelchair. (http://www.politicalgateway.com/news/read/105065)

Here's his wheelchair (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSHZhgram2E).

The Wizard

09-29-2007, 16:33

Yay bureaucracy

Gregoshi

09-29-2007, 18:49

Yay bureaucracy
Nice try Baba Ga'on, but you need to put more of a humourous twist on your responses here in News of the Weird. For example, dig up one of those captioned cat pictures of yours that essentially says the same thing as "Yay bureaucracy". Humour is the weapon of choice in dealing with the weirdness and absurdities herein. :bow:

Lemur

09-29-2007, 19:01

I think Pennsylvania is going to regret its chronic lack of fighting monks and shaolin temples. Especially when hot ninja chicks armed with swords (http://www.thepittsburghchannel.com/news/14181828/detail.html) start knocking off gas stations.

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/NinjaChicks.jpg

Female 'Ninjas' Rob Richland Gas Station With Sword, Dagger

RICHLAND TOWNSHIP, Pa. -- Police said two women dressed as ninjas were responsible for the hold-up of a Richland Township gas station Saturday morning using a samurai sword.

Police said the two women -- one with a dagger, and the other carrying the sword -- entered a Sunoco station in the 5600 block of Route 8 at about 3 a.m.

According to police, the women tied up the clerk and robbed the store of cash, cigarettes and lottery tickets.

"They were all covered in black and carrying swords, so it did appear that they were dressed like ninjas," said Chief Robert Amman of the Northern Regional Police Department. "Swords, daggers could be used to seriously harm victims, so this is a very serious crime."

Police said the clerk was not harmed and is OK.

No arrests have been made and no suspects have been identified.

Rick Lekki said it was hard for him to believe that a robbery occurred across the street from his business, R and J's bar.

"It's shocking. Things like that just don't happen out here. I just can't believe it happened," Lekki said.

Anyone with information is asked to contact police.

Video. (http://www.thepittsburghchannel.com/news/14181828/detail.html#)

Crazed Rabbit

09-29-2007, 19:05

A-hem. (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showpost.php?p=1685909&postcount=851)

~;p

Crazed Rabbit

yes, I know, different thread, but still...

InsaneApache

09-29-2007, 22:00

Here's his wheelchair (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSHZhgram2E).

As I'm old and infirm I demand I get one. I'm entitled.

Lemur

09-30-2007, 00:24

Sorry CR, I didn't mean to swipe your story. My apology:

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/killyourself.jpg

Lemur

09-30-2007, 15:25

Is the frilled shark (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8X6GKcLkdRE) allied with or opposed to the octosquids?

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/pic_1190305932129.jpg

If H.R. Geiger designed a fish, I think it would look like this ...

Fragony

09-30-2007, 21:16

Best guiness book of recors entry ever

http://www.dumpert.nl/mediabase/27669/323705aa/bikini_s_op_bondi_beach.html

so cute.

Geoffrey S

09-30-2007, 22:50

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/in_pictures/7020540.stm
Bearly made it out alive.

Crazed Rabbit

10-01-2007, 00:48

Woman gives birth to her own grandchildren:
http://apnews.myway.com/article/20070930/D8S01RUO0.html

Dang.

CR

InsaneApache

10-02-2007, 14:11

Having had his offer rejected, Mr Whisnant has threatened to begin legal action if the leg is not returned to him by next week.

He says he has a receipt showing he bought both the smoker and its contents at the auction.

"Everybody knows it's mine, period," he said. "And if anyone tries to take it, I want everything they got."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/7024124.stm

If he doesn't want his leg pulled, he'd better hop to it. :sweatdrop:

Fragony

10-02-2007, 14:40

LOL saudi woman faces divorce because of adultery. Her husband caught her red-handed when she was watching tv and a man was on :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

woad&fangs

10-02-2007, 22:14

The following article is from a U.S. magazine called The Week. A hot hot line: Swiss firefighters have released a music video aimed at easing confusion over the fire emergency telephone number. The Swiss phone system recently inaugurated a new series of directory assistance numbers that start with the digits 1 and 8. But the fire emergency number is 118, and as a result, fire departments have been inundated with wrong numbers. In the video, rapping and dancing firemen proclaim: "118, au cas ou tu flippes/ 118, inscrit-le dans ton slip" (118, in case you freak out/ 118, write it in your undies). The video is already a hit on YouTube, and several Swiss bands are producing cover versions.

Louis VI the Fat

10-03-2007, 00:32

Might as well provide you with that firefighter's video (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SISZUQbhcWQ)

***

From last week, but now that I'm posting in this thread anyway:

In the category 'Suspense and Mystery', Sarkozy was photographed a few weeks ago carrying what looked like a bundle of everday work papers:

http://www.bakchich.info/local/cache-vignettes/L430xH297/jpg_sarkolettre-petit-d9a61.jpg

However, an industrious journalist later zoomed in on it, and on the letter he's holding is written, in a flowery, feminine handwriting:

"I have the feeling that I haven't seen you for an eternity and I miss you!

On Thursday, we're leaving for a jaunt to Essaouira for my...(not readable)
But I would love to manage to see you in the week or next weekend. Millions of kisses"

To add to the suspense, Sarko immediately used his media tycoon connections. The magazine duly destroyed it's already printed copies before publication. But the story broke later anyway...

Oh, the suspense of it all! Who is she!? :beam:

InsaneApache

10-03-2007, 07:19

I bet it's not his missus. :laugh4:

Lemur

10-03-2007, 07:20

I'm sorry, did we sell you a lead-tainted toy? To make it up to you, we're going to send you ... a lead-tainted toy (http://consumerist.com/consumer/thanks-but-no-thanks/thomas--friends-customers-were-sent-lead-tainted-toys-as-apology-for-lead-tainted-toys-306219.php). Oopsie.

Thomas & Friends Customers Sent Lead Tainted Toys As Apology For Lead Tainted Toys

If you returned a recalled Thomas & Friends toy to RC2, you probably received an apology and a "bonus gift." We hope you didn't give the toy to your kid, because some of the "bonus gifts" have been recalled for lead contamination.

RC2 sent an email out to customers who received the lead tainted apology toy:

Unfortunately, the discovery that certain Toad vehicles could be potentially unsafe was made in August, after Toads had been sent as bonus gifts to some families. Many of the Toad bonus gifts are safe, however some may not be. If you received a Toad vehicle as a bonus gift from us, please check its underside for the tracking code 1656OW00 to determine if it is one of the recalled toys.

That's pathetic. Maybe the apology toys for these ones will contain polio.

Gregoshi

10-03-2007, 13:36

Today, kids, we're going to learn about something called "product safety"...

Fragony

10-03-2007, 14:27

Banquo's Ghost

10-03-2007, 14:30

We are getting frightened of our own shadows. :no:

Burning chilli sparks terror fear (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/7025782.stm).

A pot of burning chilli sparked fears of a biological terror attack in central London.

Firefighters wearing protective breathing apparatus were called to D'Arblay Street, Soho, after reports of noxious smoke filling the air.

Police closed off three roads and evacuated homes following the alert.

Specialist crews broke down the door to the Thai Cottage restaurant at 1900 BST on Monday where they discovered the source - a 9lb pot of chillies.

The restaurant had been preparing Nam Prik Pao, a red-hot Thai dip which uses extra-hot chillies which are deliberately burnt.

But the smell prompted several members of the public to call the emergency services.

Alpazan Duven, a Turkish journalist based in the restaurant's building, said: "I was sitting in the office when me and my chief start coughing and I said this was something really dodgy.

"I looked out of the window and saw people rushing and then we heard the sirens."

Supranee Yodmuang, the restaurant supervisor, was above the restaurant when she received a phone call from her boss.

"It was about 4pm when I saw the police who were closing off the roads but I didn't know why.

"My boss rang me and said I had to get out of the building because of a chemical attack."

She added: "Because we're Thai, we're used to the smell of chillies."

A Scotland Yard spokesman said: "The street was closed off for three hours while we were trying to discover the source of the odour."

Gregoshi

10-03-2007, 14:36

We are getting frightened of our own shadows. :no:

Burning chilli sparks terror fear (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/7025782.stm).

https://i60.photobucket.com/albums/h12/gbresslr/Org%20Pictures/klemperer.jpg

That will get you one week in the cooler, BG! Schultz!...

Fragony

10-03-2007, 17:15

lol only here, bionostsra-jugend threatened 4 koffieshop owners because of their non-bio eggs in the spacecakes.

Gregoshi

10-03-2007, 18:11

lol only here, bionostsra-jugend threatened 4 koffieshop owners because of their non-bio eggs in the spacecakes.
https://i60.photobucket.com/albums/h12/gbresslr/Org%20Pictures/leonaskin.jpg

Link, you idiot. You're missing your links Fragony - though I'm certain that isn't all you are missing. Perhaps you will find them at the Russian Front...

In case you aren't familiar with the 60's show Hogan's Heroes, German General Burkhalter (pictured) commonly addressed Stalag 13 commander Klink with the phrase "Klink, you idiot..." usually followed by a threat of transfer to the Russian Front.

I explain this as my intent is to pun (Klink/Link) and parody the show, not insult Fragony's intelligence. :bow: Well, I'm sure that explanation surely killed any humour that may have found its way into this post.

Husar

10-03-2007, 18:55

The joke wasn't lost here Greg, like that series a lot. :2thumbsup:

Gregoshi

10-03-2007, 19:43

I wasn't sure how much exposure HH got in Europe, so I thought it best to explain for the uninitiated.

InsaneApache

10-03-2007, 21:46

We (UK) saw it in the 60s mate. Oh and Star Trek. Fascinating.

sapi

10-04-2007, 09:15

Orgasmic phone disrupts court session (http://rss1.mediafed.com/feed/vnunet/the_INQUIRER/?link=7ca5ceef48af802057458f2fca7920b5)

:laugh4:

TB666

10-04-2007, 10:07

:laugh4: what an idiot.

Fragony

10-04-2007, 11:06

[spoil]In case you aren't familiar with the 60's show Hogan's Heroes, German General Burkhalter (pictured) commonly addressed Stalag 13 commander Klink with the phrase "Klink, you idiot..." usually followed by a threat of transfer to the Russian Front.

At that time my mom was still running around naked in the Amsterdam park and my dad hadn't yet provided the input that would lead to my existance ~;)

Boyar Son

10-04-2007, 20:57

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wk2b_twCCdw&feature=bz302

secuity breaks arm of child at school

58 sec. mark has a good pic

Husar

10-04-2007, 22:38

It's weird that the guard grabs her by her left arm but apparently her right arm is broken? :inquisitive:

Lemur

10-05-2007, 04:00

Our very own News of the Weird Gay Bomb (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showpost.php?p=1573637&postcount=372) has just walked away with the Ig Nobel prize (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7026150.stm)! Woot!

'Gay bomb' scoops Ig Nobel award

Pioneering research into a "gay bomb" that makes enemy troops "sexually irresistible" to each other has scooped one of this year's Ig Nobel Prizes.

Other winners included work on treating hamster jetlag with impotency drugs, extracting vanilla from cow dung, and the side-effects of sword swallowing.

The awards, founded in 1991, mark achievements that "first make people laugh, and then make them think".

The prize ceremony took place at Harvard University, US.

Genuine Nobel Laureates handed out the much-coveted awards to the winners, who took away no cash, but instead received a handmade prize, a certificate, and, of course, the glory of such an illustrious win.

Sword effects

Dan Meyer, executive director of Sword Swallowing Association International and an author of the British Medical Journal paper Sword Swallowing and its Side-Effects, said: "I was surprised and extremely honoured when I found out I was not only nominated for an Ig Nobel prize but that I had won it. I couldn't believe it."

He told the BBC News website that the study revealed that when professional sword swallowers ingested a single sword very carefully, it did not do much harm, but swallowing many swords, strangely shaped blades, or being distracted when swallowing, could cause injury.

The findings also suggested that sword swallowers should not swallow swords if they already had a sore throat, he said.

Unfortunately, said the organisers, nobody from the US military who carried out the research on chemicals that could prompt homosexual dalliances amongst rival troops (a research project called Harassing, Annoying and "Bad Guy" Identifying Chemicals) attended the ceremony because the study's authors could not be tracked down.

Real research

The Ig Nobel Prizes were created by the Annals of Improbable Research (AIR), a science magazine.

The awards, now in their 17th year, are intended to "celebrate the unusual, honour the imaginative - and spur people's interest in science, medicine and technology".

Marc Abrahams, the editor of AIR, told the BBC News website: "When I became the editor of a science magazine, suddenly I was meeting all kinds of people who had done things that were hard to describe, and for the most part, nobody had ever heard of.

"For some of them, it seemed a great shame that nobody would give them any kind of recognition, and that was what really led to the birth of the Ig Nobels."

Like their more sober counterpart, the Nobel Prizes, the Ig Nobels are split into several categories and all research is real and published.

2007 Ig Nobel Winners

Medicine - Brain Witcombe, of Gloucestershire Royal NHS Foundation Trust, UK, and Dan Meyer for their probing work on the health consequences of swallowing a sword.

Physics - A US-Chile team who ironed out the problem of how sheets become wrinkled.

Biology - Dr Johanna van Bronswijk of the Netherlands for carrying out a creepy crawly census of all of the mites, insects, spiders, ferns and fungi that share our beds.

Chemistry - Mayu Yamamoto, from Japan, for developing a method to extract vanilla fragrance and flavouring from cow dung.

Linguistics - A University of Barcelona team for showing that rats are unable to tell the difference between a person speaking Japanese backwards and somebody speaking Dutch backwards.

Literature - Glenda Browne of Blue Mountains, Australia, for her study of the word "the", and how it can flummox those trying to put things into alphabetical order.

Peace - The US Air Force Wright Laboratory for instigating research and development on a chemical weapon that would provoke widespread homosexual behaviour among enemy troops.

Nutrition - Brian Wansink of Cornell University for investigating the limits of human appetite by feeding volunteers a self-refilling, "bottomless" bowl of soup.

Economics - Kuo Cheng Hsieh of Taiwan for patenting a device that can catch bank robbers by dropping a net over them.

Aviation - A National University of Quilmes, Argentina, team for discovering that impotency drugs can help hamsters to recover from jet lag.

ShadesPanther

10-06-2007, 12:39

Japan's Agriculture Ministry in Wikipedia row (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/7029685.stm)

"The Agriculture Ministry is not in charge of Gundam," ministry official Tsutomu Shimomura told the Associated Press news agency.

:laugh4:

Boyar Son

10-06-2007, 19:51

Japan's Agriculture Ministry in Wikipedia row (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/7029685.stm)

:laugh4:

:laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

LOL!!!

Lemur

10-06-2007, 19:54

I think it's fair to ask, if the Japanese Ministry of Agriculture is not in charge of Gundam, then who is?

Crazed Rabbit

10-06-2007, 20:29

Advice for anyone considering hiring a minister on craiglist:

Don't. (http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/334223_wedding04.html)

Silveira denied the theft when confronted by officers ... But police arrested her Tuesday on an accusation of second-degree theft.

EDIT:
Policeman gets shot in buttocks, with his own gun. While fighting with vending machine thieves. Porn vending machine thieves.
http://mdn.mainichi.jp/national/news/20071005p2a00m0na019000c.html
Just another day in Tagawa, Fukuoka.

CR

woad&fangs

10-06-2007, 21:58

Another article from the week

Japanese scientists unveiled the latest marvel of genetic engineering: a frog with see-through skin whose organs can be studied without dissection

Dutch_guy

10-06-2007, 22:01

Aviation - A National University of Quilmes, Argentina, team for discovering that impotency drugs can help hamsters to recover from jet lag.[/ex]

Awesome ! :laugh4:

:balloon2:

Crazed Rabbit

10-08-2007, 15:17

Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign now has Sandy Berger as an adviser;

http://www.examiner.com/a-977346~He_s_back__Sandy_Berger_now_advising_Hillary_Clinton.html

WASHINGTON (Map, News) - Sandy Berger, who stole highly classified terrorism documents from the National Archives, destroyed them and lied to investigators, is now an adviser to presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton. Berger, who was fired from John Kerry’s presidential campaign when the scandal broke in 2004, has assumed a similar role in Clinton’s campaign, even though his security clearance has been suspended until September 2008. This is raising eyebrows even among Clinton’s admirers.
...
Berger has admitted stealing documents from the National Archives in advance of the 9/11 Commission hearings in 2003. The documents, written by White House counterterrorism czar Richard Clarke, were a “tough review” of the Clinton administration’s shortcomings in dealing with terrorism, Clarke’s lawyer told the Washington Post.

On several occasions, Berger stuffed highly classified documents into his pants and socks before spiriting them out of the Archives building in Washington, according to investigators.
...
The Justice Department initially said Berger stole only copies of classified documents and not originals. But the House Government Reform Committee later revealed that an unsupervised Berger had been given access to classified files of original, uncopied, uninventoried documents on terrorism. Several Archives officials acknowledged that Berger could have stolen any number of items and they “would never know what, if any, original documents were missing.”

“It shows poor judgment and a lack of regard for Berger’s serious misdeeds,” said law professor Jonathan Adler of Case Western Reserve University, who nonetheless called Clinton “by far the most impressive candidate in the Democratic field.”

:dizzy2:

CR

Lemur

10-08-2007, 15:26

Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign now has Sandy Berger as an adviser;
CR, could you please not put depressing items in the News of the Weird thread? Thanks for reminding me that our two royal families will probably exchange the Presidency next year. And after eight years of Hil, maybe it can be Jeb's turn, huh? That would be great.

Crazed Rabbit

10-08-2007, 19:22

And then Chelsea Clinton! Huzzah!

Anyways, I've got some funnier items:
Cop shoots at a skunk with its head stuck in a glass jar to save it:
http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/2007/10/skunkjarheadAP_450x198.jpg

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=69252&in_page_id=2

Larry Craig, illustrious Idaho Senator, has a 'favorite recipe' that involves shoving a hot dog up a cored out potato:
http://www.virtualcities.com/ons/id/gov/idgvlc10.htm

And finally, Let me direct you to
The Museum of Scientifically Accurate Fabric Brain Art
http://harbaugh.uoregon.edu/Brain/index.htm
Disclaimer:
While our artists make every effort to insure accuracy, we cannot accept responsibility for the consequences of using fabric brain art as a guide for functional magnetic resonance imaging, trans-cranial magnetic stimulation, neurosurgery, or single-neuron recording.

That is all.

CR

Louis VI the Fat

10-08-2007, 23:58

If you think the pain of the All Blacks' shock exit from the rugby World Cup will leave a permanent impression, spare a thought for student Kris Allen - a tattoo heralding the World Cup "winning" 2007 All Blacks is etched on his thigh.

https://img228.imageshack.us/img228/2966/09allencombtf0.jpg

Poor lad (http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/4/story.cfm?c_id=4&objectid=10468742). ~;p

Lemur

10-09-2007, 02:32

You know what goes with a tragically inaccurate tattoo? A brain-cooling heat pipe. (http://www.newscientist.com/blog/invention/2007/10/brain-radiator.html) (I can't help but notice that it relies on air-cooling. Maybe we should work out a water-cooling rig? If it's good enough for a quad-core, it's good enough for my brain.)

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/brain_radiator-753870.jpg

Brain Radiator

In severe epileptic fits, over-excited brain cells fire at such a rate they can raise the brain's temperature in that area. This causes more nerves to fire in a feedback mechanism that makes the fit even worse. One way of preventing such escalating fits is to cool the area of the brain that is susceptible.

So Takashi Saito and colleagues at Yamaguchi University in Japan have developed a heat pipe that is surgically implanted into the affected region of the brain and then connected to a heat sink on the outside of the skull. This device carries heat away from the affected area, keeping it cool and reducing the chances of severe epileptic fits in future.

Gregoshi

10-09-2007, 03:59

https://i60.photobucket.com/albums/h12/gbresslr/Org%20Pictures/klemperer.jpg

Lemur! Don't make me do another "cooler" pun...dismissed!

drone

10-09-2007, 15:59

You know what goes with a tragically inaccurate tattoo? A brain-cooling heat pipe. (http://www.newscientist.com/blog/invention/2007/10/brain-radiator.html)
The comments on Slashdot about this were great. Time to start overclocking my brain!

Lemur

10-09-2007, 18:11

I'm layin' this track down for Strike. Only in Texas, as it were.

Texas Cashier Clubs Deaf Customer For Not Talking (http://www.firstcoastnews.com/news/strange/news-article.aspx?storyid=93003)

By Kevin Cokely, KXAS/NBC News Channel

FORTH WORTH, TX -- A Family Dollar clerk in Forth Worth, Texas was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon after police said he used a crowbar to club a deaf customer. Cody Goodnight, 30, has been deaf since before the age of 2 and uses sign language to communicate.

When Goodnight tried to pay for two bottles of Sprite with a $5 bill he was assaulted by the store clerk. Investigators said the clerk, 20-year-old Ricky Young told them he thought Goodnight was being rude by not talking to him and hit him in the head with a crowbar.

Goodnight said he is still scared to return to the store or any other place alone. The clerk faces years in prison if convicted, authorities said.

A spokesman for Family Dollar said the store is conducting its own internal investigation into the incident.

Andres

10-09-2007, 18:20

Man jailed after using $1 million bill (http://uk.biz.yahoo.com/09102007/323/man-jailed-using-1-million-bill.html)

PITTSBURGH (AP) - Change for a million?

That's what a man was seeking when he handed a $1 million bill to a cashier at a Pittsburgh supermarket. But when the Giant Eagle employee refused and a manager confiscated the bogus bill, the man flew into a rage, police said.

The man slammed an electronic funds-transfer machine into the counter and reached for a scanner gun, police said.

Police arrested the man, who was not carrying identification and has refused to give his name to authorities. He is being held in the Allegheny County Jail.

Since 1969, the $100 bill is the largest note in circulation.

Police believe the $1 million note seized at the supermarket Saturday may have originated at a Dallas-based ministry. Last year, the ministry distributed thousands of religious pamphlets with a picture of President Grover Cleveland on a $1 million bill.

Andres

10-09-2007, 18:25

Will the killer cows take over the world?

Hooves in handcuffs: Cambodian cow in custody
(http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/news/world/hooves-in-handcuffs-cambodian-cow-in-custody/2007/10/09/1191695893116.html)

PHNOM PENH - A Cambodian cow was taken into police custody for causing traffic accidents that resulted in the deaths of at least six people this year, a police official said Tuesday.

The cow's owner could also face a six-month prison term under a new traffic law that holds people responsible for accidents caused by their animals, said Pin Doman, a police chief on the outskirts of Cambodia's capital, Phnom Penh.

The white, 1.5-metre tall cow was standing in the middle of a main road on Monday night when a 66-year-old motorcyclist crashed into the animal and died. Most Cambodian roads are dark at night.

Earlier this year, the same cow was responsible for another traffic accident that resulted in the death of five people and several injuries, when a truck veered off the road and crashed as its driver tried to avoid the animal.

Pin Doman said he was holding the cow at his police station.

He said the cow's owner had been warned four times in the past to keep his cattle leashed and could face prison time if relatives of those who died initiate legal proceedings.

Andres

10-09-2007, 18:32

Don't touch my doughnut!

In an unbelievable episode which many may feel highlights the absurdities of the American legal system, a man who stole a paltry doughnut today faces up to 30 years in jail.

Doughnut theft could land man in prison (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/10/08/wdonut108.xml)

It's a story that would make Homer Simpson shudder: one hungry man's unlawful desire for a doughnut may prove to be the most costliest snack ever.

In an unbelievable episode which many may feel highlights the absurdities of the American legal system, a man who stole a paltry doughnut today faces up to 30 years in jail.

Scott Masters, 41, is accused of surreptitiously putting the sweet, circular pastry into his sweatshirt without paying, then pushing away a female store worker who tried to stop him fleeing the store in Farmington, Minnesota.

US authorities said the push was being treated as a minor assault, which transforms a simple shoplifting charge into the more serious demeanour of strong-arm robbery, an offence which fetches a potential prison term of five to 15 years.

And as Mr Masters already has a criminal record, prosecutors are entitled to double his sentence, meaning a maximum 30-year stint behind bars is a possibility, however ridiculous it may seem.

Mr Masters admits he tried to steal the doughnut but denies having assaulted the clerk.

Speaking from jail, he told the St Louis Post-Dispatch: "Strong-arm robbery? Over a doughnut? That's impossible. There's no way I would've pushed a woman over a doughnut."

To make matters worse, Mr Masters said he did not even get the chance to savour the snack - he threw it away as he fled the scene.

Farmington Police Chief Rick Baker said state law treats the shoplifting and assault as forcibly stealing property - and the amount of force and value of the property does not matter.

"It's not the doughnut," Mr Baker said. "It's the assault."

To make matters worse, Mr Masters said he did not even get the chance to savour the snack - he threw it away as he fled the scene.

Poor guy...

Gregoshi

10-09-2007, 19:06

The man...reached for a scanner gun, police said...

Mistakenly thinking it would help him from being put behind bars...

The white, 1.5-metre tall cow was standing in the middle of a main road on Monday night when a 66-year-old motorcyclist crashed into the animal and died.
The man never herd the cow coming and it didn't moo out of the way.

Geoffrey S

10-09-2007, 21:38

At the risk of milking the article for all it's worth, I believe those Cambodian policemen deserve a pat on the back.

Enough with these udderly awful puns...

Lemur

10-10-2007, 05:01

Amusing ad for funeral parlor:

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/k0oig3.jpg

Banquo's Ghost

10-10-2007, 06:05

To make matters worse, Mr Masters said he did not even get the chance to savour the snack - he threw it away as he fled the scene.

Surely they should be doing this guy for littering too?

Gregoshi

10-10-2007, 11:59

Surely they should be doing this guy for littering too?
According to a police spokesman, the discarded doughnut was never found. ~;)

drone

10-11-2007, 15:49

Doctors save man with vodka drip (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7037443.stm)
Australian doctors have kept an Italian tourist alive by feeding him vodka through a drip for three days, medical staff in Queensland say.

The 24-year-old man, who had swallowed a poison in an apparent suicide attempt, was treated while in a coma.

Doctors set up the drip after running out of medicinal alcohol, used as an antidote to the poison.

Medical staff said the patient had made a full recovery, and the hangover had worn off by the time he woke up.
Did they use Stoli, Grey Goose, or Popov? :barrel:

Innocentius

10-11-2007, 18:07

https://i60.photobucket.com/albums/h12/gbresslr/Org%20Pictures/klemperer.jpg

GÖRING MAH BOIII!!!

The Wizard

10-11-2007, 18:19

In after "MAH BOIII"... it was no more than a waiting game, after all. ~D

Andres

10-11-2007, 19:26

People will marry robots, says scientist (http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=69787&in_page_id=2)

Artificial intelligence researcher David Levy was awarded a PhD today by a Dutch university for his thesis, Intimate Relationships With Artificial Partners.

Get ready to say 'I do' to R2-D2, because robots are going to be the perfect marriage material.

A British scientist claims humans and cyborgs will tie the knot in the not too distant future.

Artificial intelligence researcher David Levy was awarded a PhD today by a Dutch university for his thesis, Intimate Relationships With Artificial Partners.

He believes marriages to robots will become common.

The thesis examines changing attitudes towards the meaning of marriage and the development of robotics.

He says in the past that people only showed affection for other humans, but that this has now expanded to include pets and even robotic dogs.

This trend will eventually lead to humans loving sophisticated robots, Mr Levy argues.

He also claimed attitudes to different sexual practices had become more liberal. He was awarded his PhD at the University of Maastricht.

drone

10-11-2007, 19:55

People will marry robots, says scientist (http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=69787&in_page_id=2)
Well, that's obvious. Once the Fembots are perfected, no self-respecting geek is going to want an actual woman. ~:rolleyes:

drone

10-12-2007, 15:39

Lap dancers 'in heat' are the ones to watch (http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19626255.100-lap-dancers-on-heat-are-the-ones-to-watch.html)
TAKE a bunch of lap dancers, some lustful men and a fistful of dollars, and you have the best evidence yet for the controversial idea that women send out signals which reveal their fertile periods.

Last month, biologist Randy Thornhill challenged the orthodoxy that women do not undergo regular bouts of hormone-induced oestrus, or "heat", when they are at their most fertile - something most female mammals experience (New Scientist, 15 September, p 18). Now a study of the tips men give to lap dancers, conducted by a colleague of Thornhill's, lends further support to the argument for oestrus.

Geoffrey Miller and his team at the University of New Mexico, Albuquerque, compared the earnings of lap dancers who were menstruating naturally with those of dancers taking the hormonal contraceptive pill. During the non-fertile periods of their menstrual cycle, both sets of dancers earned similar tips. But when naturally cycling lap dancers entered their fertile period they earned significantly more in tips than their co-workers on the pill.
I would have loved to hear the funding pitch for this research. "Um, we are going to need a few thousand for this. And can we get it in ones?"

Lemur

10-12-2007, 16:31

Well, that's obvious. Once the Fembots are perfected, no self-respecting geek is going to want an actual woman. ~:rolleyes:
What's the matter, RealDoll (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RealDoll) not good enough for ya?

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/3some.jpg

drone

10-12-2007, 16:38

What's the matter, RealDoll (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RealDoll) not good enough for ya?
Inanimate. Once they make one that can get me a beer while I'm watching the game, then I'll consider. :thinking:

Ronin

10-12-2007, 17:12

Lap dancers 'in heat' are the ones to watch (http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19626255.100-lap-dancers-on-heat-are-the-ones-to-watch.html)

I would have loved to hear the funding pitch for this research. "Um, we are going to need a few thousand for this. And can we get it in ones?"

I always knew there was something about the scientific research process that I found most interesting :laugh4:

Big King Sanctaphrax

10-12-2007, 19:53

Last month, biologist Randy Thornhill challenged the orthodoxy that women do not undergo regular bouts of hormone-induced oestrus, or "heat", when they are at their most fertile

Randy Thornhill? Oh, come on.

InsaneApache

10-12-2007, 21:22

Could be lot worse. Mike Hunt for example, or even Arthur Foxache. :wink:

Pannonian

10-12-2007, 23:32

Could be lot worse. Mike Hunt for example, or even Arthur Foxache. :wink:
The groundsman at Lord's cricket ground, Mr. Hunt, insists on being called Michael rather than Mike. Similarly, the former Glamorgan fast bowler Greg Thomas preferred to be known be his second name, Gregory, rather than his first name, John.

InsaneApache

10-13-2007, 08:58

The finest of the Central Scotland force were drafted in and spent five hours attempting to catch the birds. Their efforts were captured on the mobile phone cameras of scores of motorists. The police were not amused. A spokeswoman told The Times: “It is illegal to use a mobile phone while driving.” Officers had even noted down the registration numbers of the worst offenders, and 20 of them were to be charged. “Offenders will receive a fixed penalty of three points on their licenses and a £60 fine,” she said.

Spoilsports. :laugh4:

“The air was thick with feathers and policemen and chicken catchers, I’ve never seen anything like it.”

:laugh4:

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/article2641841.ece

Lemur

10-13-2007, 16:05

I really, truly wish there were some better photos of the Scottish chicken invasion. A good weird news day in the UK.

Meanwhile, a wannabe novelist was arrested (http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=69930) after police discovered his girlfriend's torso in his closet, a leg in the refrigerator and bones in a cereal box. Officers also found the draft of a novel titled Cannibalistic Instincts.

Horror novelist suspected of killing, cooking girlfriend

Friday, October 12, 2007

An aspiring horror novelist was arrested after police discovered his girlfriend's torso in his closet, a leg in the refrigerator and bones in a cereal box, Mexico City prosecutor's spokesman said Thursday.

Police suspect he may have been responsible for two other mutilation murders as well.

Thee spokesman said Jose Luis Calva told police he had boiled some of his girlfriend's flesh, but that he hadn't eaten it. So that's alright then.

He said investigators were trying to determine if the chunks of fried meat found in a pan in the apartment were human.

The spokesman also confirmed other details about the crime scene released by the prosecutor's office Wednesday night: that body parts were spread throughout the apartment, and that Calva is being investigated in a total of three killings of women whose mutilated bodies had been found in and around the capital.

Calva told police he was a writer and poet - officers found the draft of a novel titled 'Cannibalistic Instincts,' the spokesman said.

Calva tried to escape when officers entered his apartment, but was struck by a car and had not yet recovered enough to give a statement to police, according to the prosecutors office. He was still hospitalized on Thursday, the spokesman said.

Police had come to Calva's apartment Monday to investigate the disappearance of his girlfriend, Alejandra Galeana, a 30-year-old pharmacy clerk and single mother. Her family had reported her missing on Friday and told police of her relationship with Calva.

Galeana's dismembered body was discovered in a closet; a leg and flesh from an arm were in the refrigerator, and arm bones were inside a cereal box, the prosecutor's office said.

Calva also is being investigated in the mutilation killings of an unidentified prostitute in April and an ex-girlfriend, Veronica Martinez - also a single mother and pharmacy worker - whose dismembered body was found in 2004.

After his arrest was shown on television, Martinez's mother went to police saying Calva had also been her boyfriend, and showed officers a picture of them together. Her daughter's body was found chopped to pieces on the city's outskirts, the prosecutor's office said.

Neighbor Fermin Cruz, 41, lived several floors below Calva, and said he 'seemed ill humored at times,' adding, 'one time he slammed the door on me.'

Lemur

10-13-2007, 16:17

Artist has ear created in laboratory, grafted to his arm (http://www.upi.com/NewsTrack/Quirks/2007/10/12/talk_to_the_arm_artist_attaches_3rd_ear/6165/).

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/500479992_6c70da3b4a.jpg

Talk to the arm! Artist attaches 3rd ear

Published: Oct. 12, 2007 at 4:10 PM

LONDON, Oct. 12 (UPI) -- An enterprising Cypriot artist has turned the latest in medical technology into art by having a human ear created in a laboratory and implanted on his arm.

Stelios Aroadiou had a plastic surgeon attach the ear to his forearm, making himself a topic of conversation and a main attraction at his exhibit in the British city of Newcastle on Thyme.

The newspaper The Mirror quipped it was like “Van Gogh in reverse,” a reference to the famed Vincent Van Gogh’s grand gesture of slicing off his own ear.

The artist, who goes by the name Stelarc, wants to next plant a small transmitter in the ear and rig it to a speaker so folks can hear the actual sounds the arm-ear is picking up.

InsaneApache

10-13-2007, 18:20

I nose about that one, I've been ic chin, waiting for someone to post this. Lets face it, if it was a rhinoplasty, this one could run and run.

As it is, I ear that this is only a leg pull. That guys got some neck.

:embarassed:

Pannonian

10-14-2007, 21:16

First chickens, now badgers. Maybe we should be thankful that at least they're not man-eating Basran badgers.

VILLAGE STRANDED BY RAMPANT BADGERS (http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/21988/Village-stranded-by-rampant-badgers)

Sunday October 14,2007

A FAMILY of broody badgers has left a quaint village “under siege”.

The animals have built a sett under the community’s only road, causing it to collapse, and now concrete blocks have been put in place to prevent motorists driving over the damaged street.

But as badgers are legally protected, stranded villagers in Dargate, Kent, have to wait for the creatures to do what comes naturally before they can reopen what they dubbed the “road brock”. The animals are capable of shifting vast amounts of earth with their hefty claws to put a roof over their heads.

A pub landlord said his predecessor was virtually driven out by the badgers.

Malcolm MacGregor, who moved in to The Dove last Monday, said: “The previous owner said he was losing £2,000 a week because of the badgers.

“People used to like to drive out to The Dove but, with the road blocked, the business went down. It’s ridiculous. The village is under siege.”

Resident Mike Pearce said: “We’ve been told work to remove the sett can’t begin because it might interfere with the badgers’ sex lives. What’s more important – a lot of randy badgers or the life of the village? It’s crackers.”

Felix Krish, who lives next to the hole, says it is the fourth time the badgers have closed the road: “There’s a lot of cost involved and then the badgers just move further along the lane.”

Local authorities need a special licence from Natural England, the Government’s wildlife advisers, to remove the animals.

Kent Highways spokesman Phil Scrivener said drivers took down obstacles and drove on, even though they risked serious damage to their vehicles.

He said: “Cars were driving over the sett and that’s why the road collapsed.

“The road closure remains in place while we apply for the licence. “We’ve had to put concrete blocks across the road because idiots will insist on driving on it.”

Natural England said special “badger flaps” have been devised to solve the problem without killing any of the animals.

A spokesman said: “This is a one-way gate put across the entrance to a sett. It allows the badgers out but prevents them getting back in. Once they realise they can’t get back in they go elsewhere.”

Lemur

10-14-2007, 23:53

Due to a mix-up at the hospital, two moms have their newborns switched. Not so strange, right? After ten months, everybody figures it out, and authorities make arrangements for the children to be exchanged. The moms refuse (http://www.news.com.au/story/0,10117,22574870-401,00.html?from=public_rss).

But yesterday, Ms Trojanova was adamant she could not give up her non-biological baby.

"I cannot even begin to imagine a life without Nikola," said the factory worker.

"How can I now see her as someone else's child and not my own?"

Ms Cermakova, who is pregnant again, also insisted she would not hand over the girl she was given.

"I have loved my daughter for almost a year now," she said.

"This time cannot be erased from my heart.

"But I will learn to love my other, biological daughter too."

Fragony

10-15-2007, 12:40

awesome :yes:

Lemur

10-15-2007, 21:32

Here's a campaign I can get behind—the Campaign Against Senseless Signs (http://www.funniez.net/funnynews/1-latest-news/76-CampaignAgainstSigns)!

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/water_during_rain.jpg https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/sharp_edge_sign.jpg

English campaigners against senseless signs

September, 2007. London campaigners who fight for the effective use of English attacked a growing tendency for obvious and senseless public information posters and instuctions, such as a police sign: "Don't Commit Crime."

"They assume a lack of intelligence on the part of the reader - says their spokeswoman. 'Do not commit crime. Pay for your fuel' is hardly a deterrent to a criminal who has every intention of driving off without paying."

The Plain English Campaign cited other examples including:

"Warning: Platform ends here" on the end of rail station platforms,
"May cause drowsiness" on sleeping pills,
"Warning: contains nuts" labelled on packets of nuts,
"Caution: water on road during rain"
"May irritate eyes" on a can of self-defence pepper spray,
"Do not open door while airborne except in emergency" on emergency exit doors in planes,
"Removing the wheel can influence the performance of the bicycle" from a Dutch bicycle manual,
"Do not iron clothes on body" from packaging on a steam iron,
Supermarket Tesco - which also warns shoppers that cream contains milk and that salted butter contains milk and salt - defended itself, saying it gave customers "all the possible information they should need."

The Plain English Campaign said politicians were also guilty of the trend.

"Politicians declaring 'We are taking the terrorist threat very seriously', or 'We are committed to improving the health service' is just rhetoric," he said.

He added: "Our advice would be say what you need to plainly and simply then stop. If nothing needs to be said, say nothing."

FactionHeir

10-15-2007, 21:47

I would agree with their sentiment, but I'm guessing those signs exist because of frivolous lawsuits, especially from the states.

sapi

10-16-2007, 09:34

The right one is a joke :grin2:

(see the small print? "also, the bridge is out ahead" ~:))

Geoffrey S

10-17-2007, 02:20

He added: "Our advice would be say what you need to plainly and simply then stop. If nothing needs to be said, say nothing."
Gah. Should listen to his own advice before preaching.

Louis VI the Fat

10-18-2007, 17:17

It's official! Sarkozy is now divorced from Cecilia.

French president and wife divorce

The couple's public appearances together have grown rarer
French President Nicolas Sarkozy and his wife of 11 years, Cecilia, have divorced "by mutual consent", according to a statement from the Elysee Palace.
The presidency's statement clarified an earlier announcement that they were to separate.

"What is intended by the word separation is divorce," it said.

The couple's lawyer said they had seen a judge to formalise the split and "there was no problem, they resolved everything amicably".

Speculation that they were to split had been mounting for months, with the media remarking on Cecilia Sarkozy's absence from her husband's side.

Cecilia Sarkozy has had a successful career as a model and parliamentary aide and has said that she never wanted to be a traditional first lady.

Both were already divorcees when they married each other in 1996, with two children each from their previous marriages.

"I don't see myself as a first lady. It bores me. I'm not politically correct," she said two years ago
They have a 10-year-old son together, Louis. ~:mecry:

On the upside, this might get SuperSarko in a foul mood, which might just make him go ballistic on those transport strikers. :smash:

Lemur

10-18-2007, 19:23

Perhaps Sarkozy was lured away by Japan's "Best Bottom" winner (http://www.thebachelorguy.com/best-butt-in-all-of-japan.html)?

Kaho Watanabe claims she wants to show the world that all Japanese women don't have small bums. But I gotta say, hers is pretty small by Euro-American standards.

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/DD4L2.jpg

The_Mark

10-18-2007, 21:30

Well, I'm not complaining.

Crazed Rabbit

10-18-2007, 21:50

Pro-war supporters outnumber anti-military protesters in Berkeley. For non-Americans, this is probably one of the top, if not the top, liberal city in the whole United States of America:
http://www.contracostatimes.com/news/ci_7212368?nclick_check=1

BERKELEY -- Flag-waving demonstrators far outnumbered a group of peace advocates who were protesting a U.S. Marine Corps recruiting center in downtown on Wednesday.

...

On one side of the street was CodePINK, Grandmothers Against the War, Berkeley East Bay Gray Panthers, Women in Black and other peace groups holding "no war" signs and chanting "out of Iraq."

On the other were military veterans, mothers and fathers of soldiers, members of the UC Berkeley College Republicans and Melanie Morgan, whose conservative talk show airs on KSFO. They waved American flags and chanted "USA, USA, USA."

:inquisitive:

A fluke in that city, but still.

CR

woad&fangs

10-18-2007, 22:49

I've never been to Berkeley but I doubt that it is more liberal than Madison.

Crazed Rabbit

10-19-2007, 00:09

My friend, I know Madison is liberal, but it's just the Berkeley of the midwest - like Saruman's Orthanc in the LOTR, a strong bastion, but pale and small compared to that which it imitates; Sauron's Barad Dur, the dark tower, citadel of evil, or in Berkeley's case - leftism.

If you still doubt which has sunk to a greater degree of leftism, check out some photos from this site:
http://www.zombietime.com/

Look for the ones on protests in Berkeley.

CR

Louis VI the Fat

10-19-2007, 00:14

Pro-war supporters outnumber anti-military protesters in Berkeley. In Berkeley, as in assembled in Berkeley, not from Berkeley, mind.

This is 2007 and we supportour troops. We are not going to let CodePINK disgrace our military heroes," yelled Deborah Johns, a Granite Bay woman whose 23-year-old son is preparing to head to Iraq for his fourth tour of duty. "My son is a hero and so are all the others who served this country."

One of the peace advocates, Sheila Goldmacher, a Berkeley woman with Grandmothers Against the War, said she was pushed and shoved by the flag-wavers. "They have a right to be here, they do not have the right to be thugs," she said.

But why they would all waste their time waving flags or shoving aside those that don't is beyond me, 'cause teh squids are back and this time they mean business:

https://img91.imageshack.us/img91/3879/squidhs5.jpg

Crazed Rabbit

10-19-2007, 02:19

In Berkeley, as in assembled in Berkeley, not from Berkeley, mind.

True enough, but still very weird-newsworthy.

CR

Fragony

10-19-2007, 09:29

Prodigal

10-19-2007, 15:50

This comes as no great surprise

Brits less popular after Europeans get to know them
BRUSSELS (Reuters) - A poll of Europeans showed people of different nationalities liked each other more after getting to know each other, except in the case of the British -- who became less popular.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071018/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_britain_popularity;_ylt=AvQ8rhJopzddizy5pJ8qDMrtiBIF

Crazed Rabbit

10-19-2007, 16:34

Don't we all love art. What a dontwantwarningpoints.

NOTE: No points, but certainly this warning - the link leads to distressing news and photos of animal abuse. BG

http://www.theginblog.com/2007/10/artist-chains-up-dog-until-it-dies-is-this-art-or-animal-abuse/

What an atrocity, a rape of all that is good. The artist should be tied to a chain until he starves to death. A mere hanging is too good.

CR

Lemur

10-19-2007, 16:43

Abusing dogs is on the same moral level as abusing children. Animals have close to no rights, and they depend on us not to be cruel and stupid. The artist who killed this dog should be punished. Severely. Extra-legally, if necessary.

Fragony

10-19-2007, 17:39

What an atrocity, a rape of all that is good. The artist should be tied to a chain until he starves to death. A mere hanging is too good.

CR

Yeah but he is an 'artist' and he has 'a vision', and of course his art and the message to the world is more important then the slow death of an innocent streetdog that was trusting enough to be caught. I could go medieval on this guy without feeling too bad, in fact, quite the opposite, make a piece of art myselve.

extremily angry I am.

Gregoshi

10-19-2007, 20:39

Even stretching my imagination to its absurd limit, I don't see the "art" in starving a street dog. He didn't even catch the dog himself. Not everything in a gallery or at an exhibit is "art".

I could go medieval on this guy without feeling too bad, in fact, quite the opposite, make a piece of art myselve.

Fragony, just make sure you do it at an art venue. :no:

InsaneApache

10-20-2007, 10:05

This comes as no great surprise

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071018/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_britain_popularity;_ylt=AvQ8rhJopzddizy5pJ8qDMrtiBIF

Now let's see.......I wonder if this had owt to do with it?

even though the number of French participants in the survey was disproportionately high.

:laugh4:

Marshal Murat

10-20-2007, 15:31

I've got two.

Maher Security Firm (http://www.usatoday.com/life/people/2007-10-20-maher-security_N.htm)

"Do we have some (expletive) security in this building," Maher yelled, "or do I have to come down there and kick his (expletive)?"

Dumbledore+Grindwald= Destruction of Christian Values (http://apnews.myway.com/article/20071020/D8SCUJG00.html)

She was asked by one young fan whether Dumbledore finds "true love."

"Dumbledore is gay," the author responded to gasps and applause.

Banquo's Ghost

10-21-2007, 11:22

Now this is what I call direct action for peace...

Women's panties threaten Burmese junta (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/10/19/peace_protest/).

Ladies' smalls sap generals' vital energy

By Lester Haines ? More by this author
Published Friday 19th October 2007 13:36 GMT

The Burmese military is facing an unexpected threat from female opponents to its regime - a deluge of panties dispatched to the country's embassies in a "culturally insulting gesture of protest" against its recent crackdown on protestors.

According to AP the Panties for Peace initiative is not merely symbolic, since the the group behind the campaign - Lanna Action for Burma - claims "superstitious generals, especially junta leader General Than Shwe... believe that contact with women's underwear saps them of power".

Spokeswoman Liz Hilton (if she's a relation of Paris's then we now know where the heiress's conspicuously absent smalls ended up) said: "It's an extremely strong message in Burmese and in all Southeast Asian culture."

Hilton added that "women in Thailand, Australia, Singapore, England and other European countries have started sending or delivering their underwear to Myanmar missions following informal coordination among activist organisations and individuals".
Quite how many pairs of panties will be required before Than Shwe is rendered powerless is not noted, but the Lanna Action for Burma website is urging women to "post, deliver or fling your panties at the closest Burmese Embassy any day from today".

Reports that Britney Spears is an active supporter of Panties for Peace are unconfirmed. ®

Bootnote

The Lanna Action for Burma website also says: "After a day of tri-panty dialogue, deep in the golden triangle due to the popular demand, the panties are back."
Readers should note the "golden triangle" in question is a geographical reference, and not the popular Lindsay Lohan upskirt website of the same name.

We never have this much fun at Amnesty... :beam:

Husar

10-21-2007, 11:37

:laugh4:

That's hilarious Banquo. :2thumbsup:

woad&fangs

10-21-2007, 14:02

Thanks BQ, that made my day.:laugh4:

Lemur

10-22-2007, 05:45

Deputy mayor killed by marauding monkeys. (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7055625.stm)

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/killer_monkeys.jpg

Monkeys kill Delhi deputy mayor

The deputy mayor of the Indian capital Delhi has died a day after being attacked by a horde of wild monkeys.

SS Bajwa suffered serious head injuries when he fell from the first-floor terrace of his home on Saturday morning trying to fight off the monkeys.

The city has long struggled to counter its plague of monkeys, which invade government complexes and temples, snatch food and scare passers-by.

The High Court demanded the city find an answer to the problem last year.

Solution elusive

One approach has been to train bands of larger, more ferocious langur monkeys to go after the smaller groups of Rhesus macaques.

The city has also employed monkey catchers to round them up so they can be moved to forests.

But the problem has persisted.

Culling is seen as unacceptable to devout Hindus, who revere the monkeys as a manifestation of the monkey god Hanuman, and often feed them bananas and peanuts.

Urban development around the city has also been blamed for destroying the monkeys' natural habitat.

Mr Bajwa, a member of the opposition Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP), is survived by his wife and a son, according to the Press Trust of India news agency.

Gregoshi

10-22-2007, 12:20

Apparently there were a few monkeys the deputy mayor just couldn't get off his back... ~D

Of course, this led to his fall from power... :laugh4:

Lemur

10-22-2007, 16:04

How much are you really worth? (http://www.justsayhi.com/bb/cadaver)

The Wizard

10-22-2007, 16:57

Congratulations, your dead body is worth $4950!Ooh. I need that money. BRB guys, time to go fetch the nine millimeter aspirin

The Wizard

10-22-2007, 17:52

Excuse the double post, but it needs to be here.

Ripe love ends tragically (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7056672.stm).

woad&fangs

10-22-2007, 17:57

My corpse is worth $4765

Husar

10-22-2007, 18:11

That cadaver calculator even had it's own thread here in the Backroom some months ago. :inquisitive:

Lemur

10-22-2007, 19:36

Dang it, I have posted a dupe. Apologies!

File this under the Moms Behaving Badly (http://www.king5.com/localnews/stories/NW_102207WAB_mom_arrested_SW.19668af2a.html) file (along with the Mother's Day Riot (http://www.upi.com/NewsTrack/Quirks/2007/05/14/brawl_on_mothers_day_saw_five_arrested/1478/) reported earlier in the thread).

Drunk driving mom arrested after her 8-year-old calls 911.

A woman has been arrested for investigation of drunken driving and other charges following repeated calls to 911 from her 8-year-old son, who was in the car, Clark County sheriff's deputies said. [...]

"He said 'I don't know where we are, and Mom's not acting normal,"' Walker said.

As the operator began asking the boy for landmarks and the direction the car was traveling, Walker said, Spears took the cellular telephone from the boy, told the dispatcher not to worry and hung up.

The boy called back, and again his mother cut short the call, Walker said.

"The mother kept interrupting the 8-year-old," he said. "It happened at least twice."

At one point, Walker said, Spears apparently bit the boy's hand to get the telephone away from him.

Husar

10-22-2007, 20:32

No need to apologise, next time I'll just send you a "Great post!"-PM. ~D

Crazed Rabbit

10-22-2007, 20:38

The host of "Inside the Actor's Studio", James Lipton, was a pimp. In France. In Paris itself.

http://www.abcactionnews.com/entertainment/story.aspx?content_id=0b3e52fa-dbd2-4d4d-a2fe-195173ea65e5

Actors Studio host Lipton was a pimp in France

James Lipton, the host of U.S. talk show, Inside the Actors' Studio, once worked as a pimp in Paris, France.

The revered TV presenter, who has sat down with Hollywood's biggest names for in-depth chats about their life and work over the last 13 years, has revealed he once procured clients for French hookers.

He says, "This was when I was very very young, living in Paris, penniless, unable to get any kind of working permit... I had a friend who worked in what is called the Milieu, which is that world and she suggested to me one night, `Look, you'll be my meck... We would translate it perhaps... as pimp.

"We were earning our living together, this young woman and I, we made a rather good living, I must say."

Lipton reveals in his new book Inside Inside he would set up sex shows for clients of his lady friend.

He adds, "I had to accompany my clientelle to the Rue Pigalle, which is where these things occurred. And then I'd take them up to the room and I had to remain there because they were very nervous, they were young Americans for the most part... and they didn't speak French."

CR

Crazed Rabbit

10-23-2007, 06:31

What do you do when a major metropolitan area has only 69 days of water for such essentials as, you know, not dying of thirst?

You spray large amounts of water on athletic fields! Athletic fields with fake turf! :dizzy2:

It's not even real grass.

But in the midst of what may be the worst drought ever in North Carolina, Duke University and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill are watering the synthetic turfs used by their field hockey teams.

The International Hockey Federation insists.

The universities are not breaking any rules. But like clockwork, as residents in Durham and Chapel Hill see their plants and lawns wither, the sprinklers go on at the UNC-CH Francis E. Henry Stadium and at Duke's Williams Field.

Brad Schnurr, a Chapel Hill contractor who does work in Durham, saw the sprinklers go on one afternoon recently at Duke and drove around the block to make sure he was not seeing things.

"Sprinklers aren't even the right term, they're like fire hoses," Schnurr said. "I was like, 'What is that? What is that?' I couldn't believe it."

CR

Prodigal

10-23-2007, 10:49

old news

Husar

10-23-2007, 14:05

Clicky (http://uk.news.yahoo.com/afp/20071021/tod-nigeria-helicopter-offbeat-7f81b96_1.html)
Clicky (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=93890)

Andres

10-23-2007, 22:24

Woman in wheelchair takes highway shortcut (http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSL2317764420071023?feedType=RSS&feedName=oddlyEnoughNews)

BERLIN (Reuters) - An 81-year-old German woman driving to a cemetery in her electric wheelchair decided to take a shortcut and drove the wrong way down a highway.

The wheelchair had been traveling at about four miles per hour. Vehicles on German motorways must clock at least 37 miles per hour, and there is no upper speed limit on some sections.

Motorists spotted the woman and notified authorities, who escorted her to safety.

"She told us she got lost and wanted to avoid taking a big detour," a police spokesman in the southern city of Nuremberg said.

InsaneApache

10-23-2007, 23:35

Nice to see that the Nuremberg police rallied to her aid.:embarassed:.... I'll get me coat. :laugh4:

Lemur

10-24-2007, 00:14

I think it's only right that after helping an old lady off the highway, an on-duty cop should be able to pound some brewskis and have sex. Why, oh why, are these new guidelines (http://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSL2328769020071023) being issued?

Man, being a cop just gets worse and worse!

Tue Oct 23, 2007 11:30am EDT

BRUSSELS - Police patrolling the red-light district of the Belgian capital have been ordered to stop visiting brothels and drinking in bars when on duty.

A letter sent to officers in Brussels' northern police district, and published in a Belgian daily Tuesday, urged them to set a good example and earn the public's respect.

"These officers think their duty hours are to be used to drink alcohol in bars, practice sports..., visit brothels or massage parlors, and entertain (intimate) relationships with residents of the neighborhood during their patrol," said the letter from a local police chief.

"It is only by setting a good example that the police can make itself respected," the letter said, urging officers to adopt more conservative behavior.

A police spokesman confirmed the letter was authentic, but said the police chief had only reacted to rumors of officers behaving badly while on duty.

"There was no concrete evidence to substantiate any wrongdoing by police officers ... If there had been, they would have been prosecuted," said spokesman Roland Thiebauld.

Evil_Maniac From Mars

10-24-2007, 01:37

Woman in wheelchair takes highway shortcut (http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSL2317764420071023?feedType=RSS&feedName=oddlyEnoughNews)

Alright! A local story. :laugh4:

Louis VI the Fat

10-24-2007, 13:08

Oral and Anal sex legalised in Singapore

October 23, 2007

SINGAPORE today legalised oral and anal sex between heterosexual couples but retained a law which criminalises intercourse between gay men.

In the city-state's first major penal code amendments in 22 years, Parliament repealed a section criminalising “carnal intercourse against the order of nature”.
More kink in this link (http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,22638765-1702,00.html).

For a brief moment I thought I had a real biggie for this thread, but alas, I misread two letters in this article's title:
Idol's Dicko canned by US critics (http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/story/0,23663,22639846-5013560,00.html?from=mostpop)

Ronin

10-24-2007, 14:25

Lemur

10-24-2007, 15:45

I say, if an Australian barmaid wants to crush beer cans between her breasts, do not stand in her way. Take heed, Canberra. (http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSSP32076020071024)

No can do! Court fines bare-breasted Aussie barmaid

Wed Oct 24, 2007 9:46am EDT

CANBERRA - An Australian barmaid has been fined for crushing beer cans between her bare breasts while an off-duty colleague has been fined for hanging spoons from her friend's nipples, police said on Wednesday.

Police in Western Australia said the 31-year old barmaid pleaded guilty in the local magistrate's court to twice exposing her breasts to patrons at the Premier Hotel in Pinjarra, south of the state capital, Perth.

The woman "is alleged to have also crushed beer cans between her breasts during one of the offences", in breach of hotel licensing laws, police from the Peel district of Western Australia said in a statement.

The barmaid and the hotel manager were both fined A$1,000 ($900), while an off-duty barmaid was fined A$500 for helping to hang spoons from the woman's nipples, police said.

"It sends a clear message to all licensees in Peel that we will not tolerate this type of behavior in our licensed premises," local police superintendent David Parkinson said.

drone

10-24-2007, 16:21

I say, if an Australian barmaid wants to crush beer cans between her breasts, do not stand in her way. Take heed, Canberra.
Smashing!

It's that time of year again in India: Drunken Elephant Season (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,304309,00.html)
Wild Elephants Electrocuted in India After Drinking Rice Beer

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

GAUHATI, India — Six Asiatic wild elephants were electrocuted as they went berserk after drinking rice beer in India's remote northeast, a wildlife official said Tuesday.

Nearly 40 elephants came to a village on Friday looking for food. Some found beer, which farmers ferment and keep in plastic and tin drums in their huts, said Sunil Kumar, a state wildlife official.

They got drunk, uprooted a utility pole carrying power lines and were electrocuted in Chandan Nukat, a village nearly 150 miles west of Shillong, the capital of Meghalaya state, Kumar said.

"There would have been more casualties had the villagers not chased them away," said Dipu Mark, a local conservationist.

Banquo's Ghost

10-24-2007, 18:52

Lemur

10-25-2007, 03:05

Pro tip: If you're hard up for weird news, just check out Japan. They've been coming up with weird :daisy: since the dawn of time.

Example: The car toilet. (http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUST5871220071023)

Gives new meaning to "going in the car"

Tue Oct 23, 2007 11:30am EDT

TOKYO - If you're stuck in traffic when Mother Nature calls, Japan's Kaneko Sangyo Co. has developed the loo for you.

The manufacturer of plastic car accessories drew back the curtain on Tuesday on its new portable toilet for cars.

The toilet comes with a curtain large enough to conceal users and a plastic bag to collect waste.

"The commode will come in handy during major disasters such as earthquakes or when you are caught in a traffic jam," a company official told reporters, according to Kyodo News.

Japan is situated on the Pacific "Ring of Fire" and accounts for about 20 percent of the world's earthquakes of magnitude 6 or greater.

Drivers stranded by tectonic movements or stuck in tailbacks simply assemble the cardboard toilet bowl, fit a water-absorbent sheet inside and draw round the curtain.

The product is small enough to fit inside a suitcase, the company said.

But prospective customers will have to hang on until November 15, when the firm begins selling the new product online.

Louis VI the Fat

10-25-2007, 12:42

Whilst the eyes of the civilised world are focussed on the Octosquid menace, their furry outriders of doom are immolating themselves in suicide bombings - and demonstrating a terrifying grasp of 4th generation warfare.

Flaming kamikaze squirrel torches car (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/10/24/kamikaze_squirrel/).

Sciurine death dive does for Toyota Camry

By Lester Haines
Published Wednesday 24th October 2007 09:55 GMT

A New Jersey woman's Toyota Camry last week suffered a sciurine kamikaze attack during which a flaming squirrel fell onto the vehicle, slid into the engine compartment and provoked an explosion which destroyed the parked vehicle, the Jersey Journal reports.

Lindsey Millar, 23, and bruv Tony, 22, were at home in Bayonne last Wednesday lunchtime when the incident occurred. The animal had apparently decided it was a really good move to chew through overhead powerlines directly above the motor, and was duly fried for its trouble.

Tony Millar explained: "The squirrel chewed through the wire, was set on fire, fell down directly to where the car was. The squirrel, on fire, slid into the engine compartment and blew up the car."

He added: "They're always coming around here, chewing through the garbage."
Ms Millar is apparently fully insured for incendiary squirrel strike, although her brother concluded: "It's something to laugh about once she has a new car. It's not funny yet."

As a rather poignant footnote, the Jersey Journal notes that the Millars' house is fully decked out in anticipation of Halloween, "complete with a tiny plastic tombstone on their front lawn". Tony Millar said the family "will consider dedicating the tombstone to the squirrel". ®

Nuts.
Nuts! Nuts, indeed, are our one chance at fending off this new menace. Lots of nuts (http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,,2198799,00.html):

Squirrel pays price for nutty idea

Thursday October 25, 2007

A squirrel had to be rescued from a bird feeder after eating so many nuts that it could no longer squeeze through the bars, the RSPCA said today.
RSPCA inspector Graham Hammond was called in by a resident in Christchurch, Dorset, when they found the animal stuck in the peanut-filled bird feeder on October 17.

Mr Hammond said the squirrel had managed to climb into the wire-frame feeder, but had then lost its svelte figure after gorging itself on the nuts inside.

"This was quite an unusual rescue," he added. "I think this squirrel had eyes bigger than its stomach. "After it had stuffed itself with nuts, it had a stomach too large to escape the feeder - one which, ironically, was designed to be squirrel-proof."
Mr Hammond said the grey squirrel, which was unharmed, ran off immediately.

Gregoshi

10-25-2007, 12:51

Husar

10-25-2007, 13:25

World's most advanced fighter jet is already corroding (http://www.sltrib.com/ci_7236130)

The manufacturers of the Air Force's newest fighter jet knew years ago that the composition of some mechanical access panels made the F-22 Raptor susceptible to corrosion. Military officials even changed the design to fix the problem.
But a decade later in a program already fraught with setbacks, the design flaw reappeared. Now, about two-thirds of the military's fleet of Raptors are suffering from corrosion, prompting the Air Force to speed up the timeline for bringing the aircraft through Hill Air Force Base for depot-level maintenance.
"So the world's most expensive, most advanced aircraft is in the shop for repairs for something simple that someone figured out a long time ago?" said Nick Schwellenbach, national security investigator for the Project On Government Oversight.
"I'd like to say I was outraged, and it is outrageous," Schwellenbach said, "but it's all too common."
The Project on Government Oversight has exposed numerous other problems with the Raptor, which costs more than $130 million per plane - and nearly three times that, when research, development and other costs are factored in.

You don't really have to see them on a radar if they already fall apart by themselves, do you? ~;)

Lemur

10-25-2007, 19:06

I'm convinced that Japanese culture is weirder than flaming suicide squirrels, and now I have proof (http://www.buildup.co.jp/pq/#). Eight videos, and they're so weird ... I don't really know how to describe them. I think they're selling little plastic baby toys. Maybe.

Whatever you do, don't click on the baby with the soft-serve chocolate ice cream head. That way madness lies.

Husar

10-25-2007, 19:21

If I didn't know they're from Japan I'd say they're very disturbing. :laugh4:

Gregoshi

10-25-2007, 20:02

I can't even make up my mind as to what I think about those videos Lemur. I'm soooo confused! :dizzy2:

Marshal Murat

10-25-2007, 21:20

NFL to Dolphins (http://www.palmbeachpost.com/blogs/content/shared-blogs/palmbeach/miamidolphins/entries/2007/10/24/crowder_discovers_he_wont_need.html?cxntfid=blogs_inside_the_dolphins)

Dolphins linebacker Channing Crowder confessed today he didn’t know until Tuesday that people spoke English in London.

“I couldn’t find London on a map if they didn’t have the names of the countries,” Crowder said. “I swear to God. I don’t know what nothing is. I know Italy looks like a boot. I learned that.

former Florida Gator
Now I know what is education level is.

Prodigal

10-26-2007, 08:47

Not very weird but interesting.

Neanderthals 'were flame-haired'

Some Neanderthals were probably redheads, a DNA study has shown.

Genetics could shed light on aspects of Neanderthal biology that are not preserved in fossils. These include external appearance - such as hair, skin and eye colour - cell chemistry and perhaps even cognitive ability.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7062415.stm

Fragony

10-27-2007, 09:54

Somebody call an excorsist http://www.nieuwnieuws.nl/archives/raar/2007/10/bezeten_schommel_schommelt.html

InsaneApache

10-27-2007, 09:55

Another 'you couldn't make it up' story.

When Nomatter Tagarira, a spirit medium, claimed that she could conjure refined diesel out of a rock by striking it with her staff, ministers in Robert Mugabe’s Government believed that they might have found the solution to Zimbabwe’s perennial fuel shortage.

After witnessing her apparently miraculous gift they gave her five billion Zimbabwean dollars in cash (worth £1.7 million at the start of the year but now worth one seven-hundredth of that) in return for the fuel. Ms Tagarira was also given a farm, said to have been seized from its white owner during Mr Mugabe’s lawless land grab, as well as food and services that included a round-the-clock armed guard on the rock in the district of Chinhoyi 60 miles (100km) from Harare, the capital.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/africa/article2748936.ece

This is my favourite quote.

“It’s an outlandish story but the people in government who believed this are the same ones who believe that Mugabe’s official policy of printing money will end inflation,” said an economist, who requested anonymity.

:laugh4:

Andres

10-27-2007, 11:52

ACCUSED.. OF HAVING SEX WITH HIS BIKE (http://www.sundaymail.co.uk/news/tm_headline=accused---of-having-sex-with-his-bike--&method=full&objectid=19347288&siteid=64736-name_page.html)

A MAN has been charged with having sex with his bike.

Robert Stewart was allegedly caught in the act by two terrified cleaners who walked into his bedroom in a hostel.

Stewart has denied the accusation, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.

The 51-year-old bachelor was charged with the bizarre sexual offence after he was disturbed by the cleaner and her colleague in a private hostel in Ayr.

The charge alleges he conducted himself in a disorderly manner, simulated sex with a bicycle and continued to do so while naked from the waist down in the presence of two female employees.

Stewart had been living in the Aberley House hostel from October 2006 after moving from his council house in Girvan, Ayrshire.

He moved after a separate sex complaint to which he has pleaded not guilty at Ayr Sheriff Court.

Unemployed Stewart has now left Aberley House and is living in a flat in the centre of Ayr.

Asked about the claim he was simulating sex with the bike, he said: "You'll need to ask the cleaners why they would say that.

"It's a lot of rubbish, a lot of rubbish."

His solicitor Gerry Tierney said last night: "My client denies the allegations and intends to defend the charge vigorously."

A spokeswoman for the Aberley House hostel for the homeless said: "We cannot comment because of client confidentiality."

He was probably listening to

WARNING - VIDEO CONTAINS NUDITY

this song (http://fr.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiikJn1jGNw) :sweatdrop:

Banquo's Ghost

10-27-2007, 14:12

Maybe he was confused and was trying to pump the tyres?

Craterus

10-27-2007, 17:56

Has the gay-Dumbledore thing come up in the backroom yet? I'd like to see some opinions on that. I guessed it would have its own thread or be in this one, but I don't have time to check through this thread right now.

I was in America when it came out (hah, pun not originally intended) and Fox News had a field day on it. Yeah, a link to the thread, or what page it's on in here? Thanks.

EDIT: Nevermind...

Lemur

10-27-2007, 21:25

I read about the bike sex earlier. What's sad is that the guy will now be a registered sex offender for the rest of his life. No appeals, no nothing. For having sex with a bike behind a locked door.

These sex offender lists are out of control. What a grown-up human being chooses to do behind closed doors with a feather duster, blender and a kumquat is none of my business.

Fragony

10-27-2007, 22:22

Don't know about your bikes but ours are kinda asking for it

InsaneApache

10-27-2007, 23:22

I always thought that the old '10' speed was, well sexy, in a slow sorta way. :whip:

Lemur

10-28-2007, 04:42

California couple arrested for felony cheesemaking. (http://www.centralvalleybusinesstimes.com/stories/001/?ID=6794) The wheels of justice ferment slow, but they ferment fine.

Arrests drain bathtub cheese sellers

SACRAMENTO—October 24, 2007 5:19pm

A Southern California couple is facing criminal charges after allegedly being caught with 375 pounds of “bathtub” cheese at an open-air market in San Bernardino County, the California Department of Food and Agriculture says.

The illegal soft cheese products are known to cause serious illness such as listeria, salmonella or E. coli.

Floribel Hernandez Cuenca, 29, and Manuel Martin Sanchez Garrido, 44, of Montclair, were arrested for selling a variety of unlicensed cheeses to the public. Ms. Cuenca was also arrested on felony cheese making charges.

The 375 pounds of seized illegal cheese included panela, queso fresco and queso oxaca varieties, the CDFA says. It was a significant find, the department says.

“Illegally produced is cheese is serious threat to public health,” says CDFA Secretary A.G. Kawamura.

Unlicensed products may carry a bigger price tag than consumers expect: the risk of severe illness, the state says.

Infants, the elderly and those with weakened immune systems are the most susceptible. Expectant mothers should be especially guarded, as the listeria organism can cause miscarriages.

Banquo's Ghost

10-28-2007, 09:49

Latinos, eh?

Here in Europe, it's mainly the Kurds that make illegal cheeses...

:embarassed:

InsaneApache

10-28-2007, 10:15

Latinos, eh?

Here in Europe, it's mainly the Kurds that make illegal cheeses...

:embarassed:

Whey hey!

ba bum tish :drummer:

Tribesman

10-28-2007, 10:51

Cornering the criminal
http://www.rte.ie/news/2007/1026/germany.html

KukriKhan

10-28-2007, 14:36

Not people-weird, but gov't-weird:

Russia delivers US war Supplies (http://www.armytimes.com/news/2007/10/airforce_MRAP_russian_071026w/)

If you'd told me in 1977 (when I was digging foxholes in West Germany's Fulda Gap, dreading the imminent arrival of Soviet armour) that in 30 years, Russian planes would be needed to move yank vehicles to a warzone, I'd have called you crazy, and asked to share some of whatever it was you were smoking.

Crazed Rabbit

10-28-2007, 22:46

In that vein, some people in Italy have declared that aliens testing secret weapons are responsible for spontaneously combusting appliances and other phenomena.

It just happens that the people are government investigators:
http://news.scotsman.com/international.cfm?id=1714062007

A GOVERNMENT investigation into a series of unexplained fires in fridges, televisions and mobile phones in an Italian village has concluded that the responsibility lies with "aliens testing secret weapons".

In scenes similar to the drama series The X-Files, Canneto di Caronia on Sicily was the centre of world attention three years ago after residents reported everyday household objects - electrical appliances, a pile of wedding presents and furniture - bursting into flames.

Dozens of experts including scientists, electrical engineers and military experts, arrived in the village, in the north of the island, to investigate. One amazed scientist reported seeing an unplugged electrical cable burst into flames.
...
Yesterday Francesco Mantegna Venerando, Sicily's Civil Protection chief who co-ordinated the report, said:

"We are not saying little green men from Mars started the fires, but that unnatural forces capable of creating a large amount of electromagnetic energy were responsible. This is just one possibility. We are also looking at another one which involves the testing of top-secret weapons by an unknown power which are also capable of producing an enormous amount of energy."

CR

Andres

10-29-2007, 09:51

Women fight for right to bare breasts (http://www.thelocal.se/8557/20070920/)

If girls are forced to wear bikinis, boys should be too, one of the women told The Local.

Two female students are demanding their rights after they were banned from bathing topless at a swimming pool in Uppsala. If girls are forced to wear bikinis, boys should be too, one of the women told The Local.

Ragnhild Karlsson, 22, and her friend Kristin Karlsson, 21, live on the same corridor in a student residence in the university town. On September 5th they took a trip to the Fyrishov leisure complex, where they decided to hop in for a swim without their bikini tops.

Though the pool was full of swimmers, a female lifeguard eventually caught sight of the bare-breasted women and reached for her whistle.

"We had been swimming for a while without anybody paying us any attention when the guards called us to the side and told us to either put on a top or leave. So we left," Ragnhild Karlsson told The Local.

On Wednesday, the two women sent a letter to the Equal Opportunities Ombudsman explaining that they saw no reason for men an women to be treated differently. If anything, a bikini top could be accused of drawing unnecessary attention to a woman's breasts.

"It's a question of equality. I think it's a problem that women are sexualized in this way. If women are forced to wear a top, shouldn't men also have to?"

The two friends said they were surprised when they were approached by the lifeguards.

"We thought it was against the law to treat people differently," said Ragnhild Karlsson, who is studying to be a speech therapist. Her friend Kristin aims to practice occupational therapy.

Staff at the pool later referred to studies showing that crimes of a sexual nature were particularly common in swimming pool environments.

"Surely women should be allowed to decide for themselves whether they need protecting. And is it not strange that women should somehow bear responsibily for sex crimes carried out by men," said Ragnhild Karlsson.

But a spokeswoman for the leisure complex stood by their decision not to allow the women to bathe topless.

"Swimming pools generally require men to wear swimming trunks and women to wear either bikinis or one piece swimsuits," Inger Grotteblad told The Local.

"There are three reasons for this. First, there is a security aspect, then there is a hygiene issue and finally there is what we call 'prevailing manners and customs'. It is above all this last point which is important here," she added.

She also pointed out that the swimming complex always needed to bear in mind the preferences of its guests.

"We have a lot of visitors here, ranging from families with children to the elderly. We also have people from different ethnic backgrounds. We want all of them to be able to enjoy themselves when they come here.

"This issue is new to us and we welcome the debate. It is important that everybody gets to voice their opinion, from families with children to naturists, older people and Muslim women. We have asked our governing body to look into this and hope they will come back to us with recommendations," said Grotteblad.

The_Mark

10-29-2007, 12:35

Given the small sampling, it could be a fluke, but I see only women complaining about the incident.

Tribesman

10-29-2007, 15:48

Weird indeed

http://politics.guardian.co.uk/foreignaffairs/story/0,,2201201,00.html
a department checking someone for explosives in relation to terrorism after they have had a meeting with that department about stopping terrorism .

The Wizard

10-29-2007, 16:10

CR, that's, erm... out of this world.

Fragony

10-29-2007, 16:53

Women fight for right to bare breasts (http://www.thelocal.se/8557/20070920/)

Two female students are demanding their rights after they were banned from bathing topless at a swimming pool in Uppsala. If girls are forced to wear bikinis, boys should be too, one of the women told The Local.

Ragnhild Karlsson, 22, and her friend Kristin Karlsson, 21, live on the same corridor in a student residence in the university town. On September 5th they took a trip to the Fyrishov leisure complex, where they decided to hop in for a swim without their bikini tops.

Though the pool was full of swimmers, a female lifeguard eventually caught sight of the bare-breasted women and reached for her whistle.

"We had been swimming for a while without anybody paying us any attention when the guards called us to the side and told us to either put on a top or leave. So we left," Ragnhild Karlsson told The Local.

On Wednesday, the two women sent a letter to the Equal Opportunities Ombudsman explaining that they saw no reason for men an women to be treated differently. If anything, a bikini top could be accused of drawing unnecessary attention to a woman's breasts.

"It's a question of equality. I think it's a problem that women are sexualized in this way. If women are forced to wear a top, shouldn't men also have to?"

The two friends said they were surprised when they were approached by the lifeguards.

"We thought it was against the law to treat people differently," said Ragnhild Karlsson, who is studying to be a speech therapist. Her friend Kristin aims to practice occupational therapy.

Staff at the pool later referred to studies showing that crimes of a sexual nature were particularly common in swimming pool environments.

"Surely women should be allowed to decide for themselves whether they need protecting. And is it not strange that women should somehow bear responsibily for sex crimes carried out by men," said Ragnhild Karlsson.

But a spokeswoman for the leisure complex stood by their decision not to allow the women to bathe topless.

"Swimming pools generally require men to wear swimming trunks and women to wear either bikinis or one piece swimsuits," Inger Grotteblad told The Local.

"There are three reasons for this. First, there is a security aspect, then there is a hygiene issue and finally there is what we call 'prevailing manners and customs'. It is above all this last point which is important here," she added.

She also pointed out that the swimming complex always needed to bear in mind the preferences of its guests.

"We have a lot of visitors here, ranging from families with children to the elderly. We also have people from different ethnic backgrounds. We want all of them to be able to enjoy themselves when they come here.

"This issue is new to us and we welcome the debate. It is important that everybody gets to voice their opinion, from families with children to naturists, older people and Muslim women. We have asked our governing body to look into this and hope they will come back to us with recommendations," said Grotteblad.

On the other hand, if god wanted us to have nipples why aren't we playing with them.

Andres

10-30-2007, 11:58

The Zombie invasian has started in Germany! (http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyid=2007-10-29T124408Z_01_EIC945838_RTRUKOC_0_US-GERMANY-HALLOWEEN-1.xml)

Off course, the Zombie conspirators are trying to convince us that it wasn't a real Zombie:

He's not undead, just unsober...

BERLIN (Reuters) - Passengers on a German train mistook a Halloween reveler dressed up as a gore-covered zombie for a murder victim and called the police.

The 24-year-old man fell into a drunken slumber on his way home from a Halloween party in Hamburg, police in the northern town of Bad Segeberg said Monday.

Believing his hands and face were smeared with blood, passengers alerted police after getting no response from him.

A first aid team called to the scene soon cleared up the confusion. Police told the man to remove his make-up after which he was allowed to continue his journey.

"Bad Segeberg is in a rural area and Halloween isn't very well known there," police spokeswoman Silke Tobies said. "So people weren't expecting anyone to be dressed up in the train."

He's not undead, just unsober...

Hah! Blatant lies I tell you! Prepare yourselves, fellow Orgahs, the end of the World is near!

English assassin

10-30-2007, 12:11

ACCUSED.. OF HAVING SEX WITH HIS BIKE (http://www.sundaymail.co.uk/news/tm_headline=accused---of-having-sex-with-his-bike--&method=full&objectid=19347288&siteid=64736-name_page.html)

Was it his Chopper?

http://www.rcoc.co.uk/ [Caution: contains pictures of choppers]

of course none of this will make the remotest sense if chopper isn't a slang word for willy any more...

Fragony

10-30-2007, 12:38

THIS IS SPARTA

http://www.fietsplusvandevelde.nl/electro_fietsen/Sparta_Ion_Comfort_Heren.jpg

Husar

10-30-2007, 12:46

Hah! Blatant lies I tell you! Prepare yourselves, fellow Orgahs, the end of the World is near!
Let me assure you that everything is fine here in Germany. :skull:

Gregoshi

10-30-2007, 16:21

The Zombie invasian has started in Germany! (http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyid=2007-10-29T124408Z_01_EIC945838_RTRUKOC_0_US-GERMANY-HALLOWEEN-1.xml)
Yikes! They are training zombies in Germany! Just follow the zombie tracks to the dining car.

THIS IS SPARTA

http://www.fietsplusvandevelde.nl/electro_fietsen/Sparta_Ion_Comfort_Heren.jpg
I remember the Spartan.

Lemur

10-31-2007, 17:16

Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you the $24,000 pussy (http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?in_article_id=73449).

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/ashera-cat-1.jpg

The world's most expensive cat

Monday, October 29, 2007

It is the most expensive pet cat on the market – priced at £12,000 – so you might expect it to have more expensive tastes.

The Ashera, billed as the world's 'largest, rarest and most exotic' domestic cat, is the size of a small dog and sports eye-catching leopard-like spots and tiger stripes.

British businessman Simon Brodie is selling the designer kittens for £10,796 plus shipping costs – and already has a nine-month waiting list.

The Internet entrepreneur used a team of geneticists to develop the exotic cats at his US laboratory.

They are hybrids, cross bred from two wild c a t s – t h e African serval and the Asian leopard cat – with one type of domestic cat.

The bespoke cats stand more than 1m tall (3.3feet) on their hind legs and grow to a top weight of 30lb.

Despite their price, Mr Brodie insists the Ashera is a good tempered, low maintenance pet.

The London-born businessman, who now runs his company Lifestyle Pets in San Diego, California, said: 'The Ashera is unique. It's a beautiful cat, created using our special recipe. 'They are expensive, but we've already sold a lot in the US, in Asia and even in Russia. People who love beautiful pets will spend £12,000 on a cat, others spend that much on jewellery or a big TV.'

He began his quest to make the perfect cat three years ago, developing the hypo-allergenic cat priced at £4,906.

Why does the Ashera cost more than other designer cats? Mr Brodie said: 'We guarantee every kitten has the same colouring and appearance and we hand deliver it.'

Husar

10-31-2007, 17:42

The picture in the article is quite fine, on the one you posted here it looks a bit like it weren't even worth 20$. :sweatdrop:

Gregoshi

10-31-2007, 18:59

$20000 cat on a 25 cent rope, er, leash. :no: The cat has standards, you know.

Lemur

10-31-2007, 19:02

50,000 volts delivered straight to your eye (http://www.cbc.ca/canada/toronto/story/2007/10/29/siu-taser.html?ref=rss). Who says Canadians aren't tough on crime?

Toronto man struck in eye by police Taser

A man is in hospital and may lose one of his eyes after being hit by a police Taser over the weekend in Toronto.

The province's Special Investigations Unit has been called in to review the incident.

SIU spokesman Frank Phillips said Toronto officers were called to the scene of a domestic dispute in the St. Clair and Dufferin area on Saturday morning.

Phillips said a man who left the scene was confronted by police along St. Clair Avenue.

"The male was quite agitated [and] had been drinking. The officers on scene requested a sergeant attend the scene, and after further interaction with this gentleman, the sergeant deployed the Taser. And one of the probes struck the man in the eye.… we're treating this as a serious injury," said Phillips.

The Taser's hook-like prongs embedded in the man's eye and then delivered a blast of electricity.

The SIU is looking into whether the police were justified in firing the weapon and what caused the man to be hit in the eye.

The unit is called in any time there is a serious injury to a civilian involving police.

Crazed Rabbit

10-31-2007, 19:35

Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you the $24,000 pussy (http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?in_article_id=73449).

And so begins the age of genetically engineered decadence.

CR

Geoffrey S

11-01-2007, 11:42

Not really weird, and not news, but I need to vent my frustration somewhere:

30 flippin' euros to those glorified tax-collectors for one-and-a-half blasted meters cycling over a pavement from road to bikerack! Have they got nothing better to do?

Fragony

11-02-2007, 08:15

Holier then thou. Increasingly.

http://www.geenstijl.nl/archives/images/45.jpg

A hole in Russia. Started small. getting bigger, nobody knows why.

Husar

11-02-2007, 11:45

Looks very black, as if they poured oil into the ground. :inquisitive:

Fragony

11-02-2007, 12:36

Looks very black, as if they poured oil into the ground. :inquisitive:

Multicultist hole

ha two can play that game ~;)

Husar

11-02-2007, 12:51

Since multicultists here come mostly from the green party, I doubt they'd pour oil into the ground.
In that case, I'd think it's black due to the sinful, evil multicultist nature and thus an evil multicultist hellhole of doom and death. :no:

macsen rufus

11-02-2007, 14:36

Isn't that the same Black Hole that "almost certainly" won't destroy the earth, having escaped from CERN and used its quantum super-powers to reach Russia?

woad&fangs

11-02-2007, 17:54

It is obviously the begginning of a portal to hell so the zombie apocalypse can start.

ShadesPanther

11-02-2007, 18:28

Someone in that building divided by zero.

Gregoshi

11-02-2007, 22:00

Someone in that building divided by zero.
:idea2: Ah! There's the problem. They divided by a hole number.

CountArach

11-02-2007, 22:06

It is obviously the begginning of a portal to hell so the zombie apocalypse can start.
Or the Octosquids are coming out.

And that was so awful Gregoshi...

Gregoshi

11-03-2007, 00:44

And that was so awful Gregoshi...
Have some pity, I was behind on my quotient last month so I have dug myself into a hole this month...

Crazed Rabbit

11-03-2007, 01:16

Apparently Hitler had “constipation and colossal flatulence occurred on a scale I have seldom encountered.” according to his physician:

Medical historians are unanimous that der Fuhrer had der farting problem, according to an article by historian and travel writer Tony Perrottet in this month’s The Smart Set, a magazine from Drexel University in Philadelphia.

Hitler wrongheadedly tried to cure himself, Perrottet says, by reasoning a mostly vegetarian diet would make his farts less offensive.

A hypochondriac, Hitler swore off meat in 1931, saying his ham tasted like “a corpse” after his niece Geli Raubel killed herself.

From then on, Hitler ate vegetables, oblivious that his diet was making him smell worse. His physician, Dr. Theo Morell, wrote that after Hitler downed his vegetables, “constipation and colossal flatulence occurred on a scale I have seldom encountered.”

Morell was a quack who earned Hitler’s loyalty and took over the dictator’s medical care in 1937. Morrell, Perrottet says, “was grossly obese, with frog-like features, sulfurous B.O. and venomous halitosis.” He also likely worsened Hitler’s dementia with Dr. Koester’s Anti-gas Pills, which contained strychnine, a poison, and antropine, which causes mood swings.”

Morrell also injected Hitler with amphetamines every morning starting in 1941. U.S. intelligence later found Morell was daily pumping Hitler with 28 different drugs. But Morrell’s diaries make clear that no matter what, Hitler kept on farting.

http://www.bostonherald.com/news/international/europe/view.bg?articleid=1041553

Ain't history neat?

CR

The Wizard

11-03-2007, 01:20

It is obviously the begginning of a portal to hell so the zombie apocalypse can start.Now you're thinking with portals.

Gregoshi

11-04-2007, 04:50

Apparently Hitler had “constipation and colossal flatulence occurred on a scale I have seldom encountered.” according to his physician...

So in all probability, the Nazi salute was just a clever way to fan your nose against farting Fuhrer. I imagine at staff meetings with all the generals "Heil Hitler"-ing each other, the room could be cleared of flati quickly - at least for a short while.

InsaneApache

11-04-2007, 13:52

Yeah but who's gonna tell him? :laugh4:

Crazed Rabbit

11-04-2007, 18:08

Here's some news to cheer up people about going to the Dentist:
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2003991245_dentist03.html

Dentist's drill bit lodged in patient's sinus cavity

By SUE WEIBEZAHL PORTER

The (Syracuse, N.Y.) Post-Standard

SYRACUSE, N.Y. — A dentist who was dancing to the song "Car Wash" while extracting a patient's tooth lost an inch-long drill bit, which punctured the patient's sinus cavity and came to rest by her eye socket, according to the woman's lawsuit.

...

Fanning had gone to the emergency dental clinic at Syracuse Community Health Center in October 2004 after pain in a molar worsened. Trusty gave her novocaine and while he was drilling to break the molar into quadrants before the extraction, Fanning heard a snap.

During the procedure, the lawsuit said, Trusty was "performing rhythmical steps and movements to the song 'Car Wash,' " which was on the radio in the dental suite.

Trusty then used a metal hook to try to pull the bit out, but that only pushed it farther up, driving it through the sinus and bone, the lawsuit says.

Trusty's efforts to remove the bit gouged and scraped the inside of Fanning's sinus cavity and widened the hole where the bit entered, Cote said.

When Fanning asked what was happening, Trusty told her it wasn't a big deal and that she'd likely sneeze the drill bit out, she said.

She expressed alarm and he offered to call an oral surgeon who was a friend and get her an appointment for two days later, Fanning said. Trusty made the call in front of Fanning.

When he got off the phone, she said, he told her she needed to get to an emergency room immediately. The dentist then gave her an extra shot of novocaine in case she had to wait to see a doctor, she said.

...

They had to use a chisel to break into the sinus wall, then cauterize that part of the sinus down to the bone, according to University Hospital records.

Fanning, who works for Verizon and is the mother of three boys, said doctors told her later that if she had sneezed with the bit still inside, she could have blinded her left eye.

Note: Don't read the previous article if you have an irrational fear of dentists.

CR

Tribesman

11-05-2007, 14:08

A penis that comes and goes ?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/4249949.stm

InsaneApache

11-05-2007, 15:00

What a Sithole. :laugh4:

macsen rufus

11-05-2007, 18:58

She told the court that the penis had returned because the healer had not been fully paid for his services.

Strange testimony, but does it stand up in court?

Okay....

:creep:

Lemur

11-07-2007, 03:24

Vote held on stupidest laws in Great Britain. The winners are: (http://www.upi.com/NewsTrack/Quirks/2007/11/06/topless_fish_store_workers_among_odd_laws/1624/)

A law forbidding people from breathing their last breath inside Parliament
A law that said placing a stamp bearing the image of the ruling British monarch upside down on an envelope represented an act of treason
A law allowing female tropical fish store employees to go topless

Lemur

11-07-2007, 03:27

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/falling_cow.jpg

Cliff-diving cow hits minivan (http://www.upi.com/NewsTrack/Quirks/2007/11/06/believe_it_cliff-diving_cow_hits_minivan/4318/)

WENATCHEE, Wash., Nov. 6 (UPI) -- A Michigan couple are happy to be alive after a cow fell from a 200-foot cliff and landed on top of their minivan outside Manson, Wash.

Charles Everson Jr., 49, of Westland, Mich., told The Wenatchee (Wash.) World Monday he never saw the incoming animal until it landed squarely on the minivan as he and his wife Linda traveled along Highway 150 last weekend.

"It was just 'bam' -- you just saw something come down and hit the hood," he said of Sunday's accident. "I'm like, 'I don't believe this. I don't believe this. I don't believe this.' "

Chelan County Fire District 5 chief Arnold Baker said the cow, which he estimated at nearly 600 pounds, had been reported missing by a local breeder.

Whatever caused the animal to hurdle off the cliff remains a mystery, but Baker told the World the couple was lucky to escape with only a heavily-damaged vehicle.

"It's funny because it was such a close call," Baker said. "Inches different and the couple in this car would have been killed."

Gregoshi

11-07-2007, 04:50

Beware the cow droppings...

macsen rufus

11-07-2007, 10:14

A law allowing female tropical fish store employees to go topless

I don't see anything stupid about that :no: (Except that it's an urban myth, of course.....)

Gotta uphold the traditional British values like fish 'n' nips!

I'm surprised they didn't come up with Cromwell's legacy of mince pies being illegal due to their "idolatrous" nature...

Big King Sanctaphrax

11-07-2007, 18:52

Defence Minister chooses motor-racing over job. (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/politics/7082833.stm)

Crazed Rabbit

11-08-2007, 01:28

You may be able to "shake the fat" away soon:

Researchers on Long Island have made a remarkable breakthrough in weight loss. They say they've discovered a way to reduce fat and increase muscle mass by, literally, shaking away the fat.

The campus of Stony Brook University is abuzz with worldwide attention on the incredible finding.

"My sister who lives in northern Italy called me this morning to say my picture is in her newspaper today," said Stony Brook researcher Dr. Stefan Judex.

At the Center for Biotechnology, Dr. Judex explained "the buzz" is literally about a buzz, that is, a low buzz generated through a square platform that led to healthier bones and less fat in mice. The vibration is at such a low frequency, it's barely discernable.

After 15 minutes a day, five days a week, for 15 weeks, the mice used in the experiment had 27 percent less fat, and 27 percent more bone than mice that did not stand on the platform.

Stony Brook scientist Dr. Clinton Rubin then used the method on turkeys, and just like the mice did, the turkeys also gained healthier bone mass. Dr. Rubin then patented the vibrating platform when abdominal scans showed vibrated animals were also resulting in a smaller percentage of fat, including less visceral fat and less subcutaneous fat.

"Either this is this is the coolest thing over, or we are totally nuts," said Stony Brook researcher Dr. Kim Luu.

http://wcbstv.com/local/stony.brook.fat.2.490479.html

Let's order up a couple million for America, and then we'll be like svelte gods to the rest of the world!

EDIT: "T-Rex" saves the day with his nun-chucks after some meth dealers tried to kidnap his friend:
http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_7392286

Who says Utah is boring?

CR

lars573

11-08-2007, 05:34

Simple birth defect or hard evidence of an Octosquid-Human hybrid breeding programme. Read and decide for yourself! (http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article432243.ece) :help:

Peasant Phill

11-08-2007, 09:48

CR, that plate already exists and is called the powerplate. It's pretty common in Belgian Fitness centers. Heck, even nock-offs have been promoted.

Ser Clegane

11-08-2007, 11:00

Mother sent stripper to schoolboy's classroom as birthday treat (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=492329&in_page_id=1770)

:2thumbsup:

InsaneApache

11-08-2007, 11:47

Mother sent stripper to schoolboy's classroom as birthday treat (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=492329&in_page_id=1770)

:2thumbsup:

I just read that in The Times. Hilarious. :laugh4:

Gregoshi

11-08-2007, 12:33

Husar

11-08-2007, 14:42

:laugh4:

What I don't get though is that the boy is supposedly in trouble.
Do they mean that he has overpressure now or does anyone blame him for the incident? :inquisitive:

Gregoshi

11-08-2007, 14:59

What more can they do to him? He's already got a spanking. :laugh4:

Ronin

11-08-2007, 16:03

I always knew my parents were holding out on me!!!:wall:

:laugh4:

Andres

11-08-2007, 16:18

Man Repeatedly calls 911 to Demand Beer Delivery (http://www.wvva.com/News/index.php?ID=18041)

It may have seemed like an emergency at the time, but a Connecticut man is now regretting his call to 911.

35-year-old Brian Poulin of Hebron was arrested Sunday after police said he called 911 several times and asked them to bring him beer.

Hebron was charged with disorderly conduct.

Police said he called 911 numerous times and told the dispatcher he was out of beer and asked them to pick up more for him.

Poulin was transported to Windham Community Memorial Hospital after officers arrested him at his home.

Police did not say what he was treated for.

He is scheduled to appear in Superior Court in Rockville on Nov. 20.

:laugh4:

drone

11-08-2007, 17:57

That happened on a Sunday. He obviously ran out during the football game, I'd say it classifies as an emergency. ~D

edyzmedieval

11-08-2007, 19:33

That happened on a Sunday. He obviously ran out during the football game, I'd say it classifies as an emergency. ~D

He ran out of beer watching the kevlar-armoured dancers? Now I do call that an emergency myself. No beer = nothing to do.

Fragony

11-08-2007, 22:43

LOL whacky arabs, fatwa on camel beauty contest :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

Edited to add story link: Here (http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/6/story.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=10474985). ~Kukri

Boyar Son

11-09-2007, 01:56

That happened on a Sunday. He obviously ran out during the football game, I'd say it classifies as an emergency. ~D

No beer for the game?!?! that IS an emergency!!:help:

(except for volleyball and soccer vodka will have to doze me outta that one)

Crazed Rabbit

11-12-2007, 06:19

Ferret Waste: Our New Weapon in the War on Drugs.

"Ferret waste, like nearly any other form of pet waste, can be effectively used to help prevent the abuse of unused prescription drugs," SAMHSA [Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration] spokesman Mark Weber said.

This news delighted the American Ferret Association.

"The U.S. government declares ferret poop to be an effective weapon against drug abuse," the group said in a statement.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071107/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_drugs_poop

CR

Tribesman

11-13-2007, 14:23

A nut with a gun and nuts
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7091904.stm

Ronin

11-13-2007, 15:57

"A US man has injured himself in both legs after attempting to loosen a stiff wheel-nut by blasting it with his gun."

yup...sounds like a fool-proof plan to me Billy Bob! :laugh4:

woad&fangs

11-13-2007, 22:30

Paris Hilton Raises awareness about Drunk Elephants (http://tv.msn.com/tv/article.aspx?news=284021&GT1=7703)

Papewaio

11-13-2007, 23:10

Bank worker busted on Facebook dressed as fairy (http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,22756398-2,00.html)

"Something came up at home and I had to go to New York this morning," Mr Colvin wrote on the afternoon of October 31, the day of the party.

The Facebook pictures were uncovered the following day by co-workers, showing Mr Colvin in a neon fairy costume, with a beer in one hand and a "magic wand" in the other.

When Mr Colvin's boss, Paul Davis, replied to the email, he copied the entire office.

"Thanks for letting us know - hope everything is ok in New York," he wrote. "Cool wand."

Hehehehe

Lemur

11-14-2007, 06:59

I guess it was inevitable after the goat bride. Man marries dog. (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071113/ap_on_fe_st/india_man_weds_dog)

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v489/Lemurmania/pug-dog-bride.jpg

Man in India marries dog as atonement

Tue Nov 13, 4:56 PM ET

NEW DELHI - A man in southern India married a female dog in a traditional Hindu ceremony as an attempt to atone for stoning two other dogs to death — an act he believes cursed him — a newspaper reported Tuesday.

P. Selvakumar married the sari-draped former stray named Selvi, chosen by family members and then bathed and clothed for the ceremony Sunday at a Hindu temple in the southern state of Tamil Nadu, the Hindustan Times newspaper said.

Selvakumar, 33, told the paper he had been suffering since he stoned two dogs to death and hung their bodies from a tree 15 years ago.

"After that my legs and hands got paralyzed and I lost hearing in one ear," he said in the report.

The paper said an astrologer had told Selvakumar the wedding was the only way he could cure the maladies. It did not say whether his situation had improved.

Deeply superstitious people in rural India sometimes organize weddings to dogs and other animals, believing it can ward off certain curses.

The paper showed a picture of Selvakumar sitting next to the dog, which was wearing an orange sari and a flower garland.

The paper said the groom and his family then had a feast, while the dog got a bun.

Gregoshi

11-14-2007, 15:21

I guess it was inevitable after the goat bride. Man marries dog. (http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071113/ap_on_fe_st/india_man_weds_dog)

I think we know who's gonna wear the collar in that family. :laugh4:

Pannonian

11-14-2007, 21:31

For want of a better place to post in the Backroom.

Who's making your neighbourhood safer - Hampshire police. (http://bp0.blogger.com/_z5hT1P0X79c/RyEYRqk_X2I/AAAAAAAABBo/smNxoDEgHLY/s1600-h/hants)

InsaneApache

11-14-2007, 21:54

For want of a better place to post in the Backroom.

Who's making your neighbourhood safer - Hampshire police. (http://bp0.blogger.com/_z5hT1P0X79c/RyEYRqk_X2I/AAAAAAAABBo/smNxoDEgHLY/s1600-h/hants)

Good grief they have a van from 91/2, I wonder if they'r e illegals. After all there's only about 10 grand guarding us. :dizzy2: :laugh4:

Tribesman

11-14-2007, 23:05

Good grief they have a van from 91/2
It is a bus .

Papewaio

11-15-2007, 04:47

God help you if they are the fittest police they could find... or the best looking if they don't have any fit ones.

Lemur

11-15-2007, 05:30

Not to flog the obvious, but I think the point of that pikkie is the suggestive placement of the exhaust pipe.

Ice

11-15-2007, 06:14

A nut with a gun and nuts
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7091904.stm

Well maybe he was drunk...

The man - who police say was on his own and not intoxicated - was taken to hospital with severe, but not life-threatening, injuries.

:laugh4:

Husar

11-15-2007, 12:40

Not to flog the obvious, but I think the point of that pikkie is the suggestive placement of the exhaust pipe.
Oh, didn't notice that before. :laugh4:

But I noticed what Pape says. :sweatdrop:

Andres

11-15-2007, 14:25

Censorship at it's best: Santa's "Ho, ho, ho" politically incorrect. (http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,22739551-953,00.html)

Santa ho,ho,ho gets heave-ho

THERE'LL be no ho, ho, ho this Christmas. Aspiring Santas have been told not to use the term "ho" because it could be seen as derogatory to women.

Thirty trainees at a Santa course in Adelaide last month, held by recruitment company Westaff, were urged to replace the traditional festive greeting with "ha, ha, ha".

A Santa veteran of 11 years who attended the course said the trainer was very clear in spelling out no to "ho".

Two Santa hopefuls reportedly left the course after the trainer's edict.

The term "ho" is also American slang for a prostitute. "We were told it was a derogatory term for females and can upset people," said the Santa, who did not want to be identified.

"As far as I'm concerned, a hoe is something you dig the ground with.

"I don't think you'll hear too many Santas saying `ha, ha, ha'."

University of South Australia communications senior lecturer Dr Jackie Cook said any banning of "ho, ho, ho" was "nonsense".

"Can we use a garden hoe anymore? Do we have to remove that?" she said.

"Ho, ho, ho from Santa is going to be everywhere. It's going to be in books, on Christmas cards and kids are going to come across it sooner or later.

"You could say that `ha, ha, ha' was dangerous because it was always tied to the villains in movies and horror films."

Family First MLC Dennis Hood described the "ho ho ho" ban as "plain madness".

"There is nothing wrong with `ho ho ho'," he said.

"That term has been used for many years and it hasn't seemed to have done any harm at all.

"This term would be of no offence to anyone at all, it is just the politically correct police trying to impose their views on society."

Westaff is the nation's largest supplier of Santa Clauses, providing more than 550 nationally. It has 60 on its books in South Australia. This year, it has won the lucrative contract to supply Santas at David Jones' Magic Cave in Rundle Mall.

Westaff national operations manager Glen Jansz said the company's Santas had been urged to "tone down" their use of the "ho, ho, ho" phrase – but he said it wasn't for fear of offending women.

"The reason behind that is we find that in some cases the little kids can get a little bit scared of the deep ho, ho, hos and we ask them to be mindful of keeping their voices to a lower level," he said.

"And kids are probably more inclined to understand `ha, ha, ha', than `ho, ho, ho'."

When Santa arrived at the Magic Cave after yesterday's Christmas Pageant, his only greeting to a crowd of hundreds of children was a wave and "Merry Christmas".

"I can say anything I like," he said.

The `ho, ho, ho' edict came as Santa's working conditions were also revealed. The Sunday Mail has obtained a copy of Westaff's "Santa Project" Australian Workplace Agreement.

The 15-page document stipulates, in part, that Santa will:

WORK on a casual basis and earn a base rate of $20.50 an hour.

GET a 10-minute paid toilet break during a four-hour shift and a 30 minute unpaid meal break if working 5.5 hours or longer.

BE AVAILABLE to work at any time on any day for the six weeks leading up to Christmas.

He must also maintain character at all times so as "not to raise any questions or complaints" from customers. His uniform and accessories must always be presentable.

Mr Jansz said the AWA passed the Federal Government's Fairness Test.

Ha, ha, ha... :wall:

EDIT:

Ahem...
Ho
Ho
Ho
https://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t2/AndresTheCunning/Hohoho.jpg
:sweatdrop:

Gregoshi

11-15-2007, 14:38

Censorship at it's best: Santa's "Ho, ho, ho" politically incorrect. (http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,22739551-953,00.html)

:wall: is right Andres. Context folks!! Context!

Husar

11-15-2007, 14:59

Ho ho ho.

I'm teh realz gh3tt0 g4ngst4 now, rightz?

Fier me wiminz, fier m3. :dizzy2:

Eh, I mean kids. :juggle2:

Andres

11-15-2007, 15:50

Welcome in Absurdistan (http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN149406020071114)

Swiss tell German guy to learn German

A 70-year old German seeking Swiss citizenship was told to go back to school to learn his own native tongue despite being proficient in German, a Swiss newspaper said.

The Swiss town of Dielsdorf ordered Ulrich Kring -- who lived in Switzerland his entire life but is only now applying for citizenship -- to take a German language course to the tune of 250 Swiss francs ($222.6), the Tages-Anzeiger newspaper said.

The class was obligatory for all foreigners seeking a Swiss passport and the town would not make an exception for the German national, the newspaper said.

Kring had lodged an appeal against the decision with a higher local authority, but had not had a reply yet.

Roughly two-thirds of Switzerland's 7.5 million inhabitants are German speakers. Many German nationals find the Swiss spoken dialect hard to understand, although the official written language taught in schools is the same as in Germany.

There is a hot debate about immigration in Switzerland, where some 20 percent of the population are foreigners, and some newspapers have criticized the big influx of immigrants from neighboring Germany.

Whatever happened to common sense? :bigcry:

Ronin

11-15-2007, 17:50

Seagull Shoplifter (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/north_east/6907994.stm)

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v677/vincent_pt/seagull.gif

cheeky bastard!!! :laugh4:

Fragony

11-15-2007, 19:34

Husar

11-15-2007, 23:44

Surfer dude stuns physicists with theory of everything (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/main.jhtml?xml=/earth/2007/11/14/scisurf114.xml&CMP=ILC-mostviewedbox)

An impoverished surfer has drawn up a new theory of the universe, seen by some as the Holy Grail of physics, which has received rave reviews from scientists.

Garrett Lisi, 39, has a doctorate but no university affiliation and spends most of the year surfing in Hawaii, where he has also been a hiking guide and bridge builder (when he slept in a jungle yurt).

In winter, he heads to the mountains near Lake Tahoe, Nevada, where he snowboards. "Being poor sucks," Lisi says. "It's hard to figure out the secrets of the universe when you're trying to figure out where you and your girlfriend are going to sleep next month."

:inquisitive:

Ice

11-16-2007, 01:26

Some birds are smart, especially crows.

And some like to be sure. If you have to kill yourselve, why not cut your own head of with a chainsaw? Only in dutch sorry http://www.nieuwnieuws.nl/archives/raar/2007/11/man_onthoofd_zichzelf_met_kett.html

A really awful translation: (I cleaned this up the best I could)

Man decapitates himself with chain saw

A 19 year old person who lived in his parent's house, started a chain saw and cut off his head.

The younger sisters of the victim heard the crash and stormed to the chamber where the bloody event took place. They were late and found the decapitated body of their brother.

Computer game

It is not entirely clear for what reason the boy proceeded with this atrocious action. "he had just graduated and seemed bright",a person commented. It is remarkable, however, that the boy played a still unknown computer game, where it the intention was as many decapitate monsters as possible with a saw.

Any Dutch speakers feel free to correct me :sweatdrop:

Marshal Murat

11-16-2007, 01:37

There is one ahead of the gaming competition.

I just don't understand how he would willingly or accidentally kill himself.

Gregoshi

11-16-2007, 02:01

I just don't understand how he would willingly or accidentally kill himself.

Maybe he was trying on a neckless. :inquisitive:

Marshal Murat

11-16-2007, 03:35

A good neckless usually costs and arm and a leg, but I guess this one was very precious.

Gregoshi

11-16-2007, 04:25

A good neckless usually costs and arm and a leg, but I guess this one was very precious.

:laugh4:
Yes, but you have to keep your head about these things. Maybe he haggled a good price and got it for a Stihl...

R'as al Ghul

11-16-2007, 13:40

Seagull Shoplifter (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/north_east/6907994.stm)
cheeky bastard!!! :laugh4:

Way to go. :2thumbsup:

Once outside, the crisps are ripped open and the seagull is joined by other birds.
Pigeon: "Yo Sam, think you can get us some crisps?
Sam: "Sure, hold on."

Mr Nagarajan said: "He's got it down to a fine art. He waits until there are no customers around and I'm standing behind the till, then he raids the place.
https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v677/vincent_pt/seagull.gif

drone

11-16-2007, 22:56

One step closer to the glorious Pastafarian emergence:

Religious scholars mull Flying Spaghetti Monster (http://www.cnn.com/2007/LIVING/personal/11/16/flying.spaghettimonster.ap/index.html)
(AP) -- When some of the world's leading religious scholars gather in San Diego this weekend, pasta will be on the intellectual menu. They'll be talking about a satirical pseudo-deity called the Flying Spaghetti Monster, whose growing pop culture fame gets laughs but also raises serious questions about the essence of religion.

The appearance of the Flying Spaghetti Monster on the agenda of the American Academy of Religion's annual meeting gives a kind of scholarly imprimatur to a phenomenon that first emerged in 2005, during the debate in Kansas over whether intelligent design should be taught in public school sciences classes.
.
.
.
The authors recognize the topic is a little light by the standards of the American Academy of Religion.

"You have to keep a sense of humor when you're studying religion, especially in graduate school," Van Horn said in a recent telephone interview. "Otherwise you'll sink into depression pretty quickly."

But they also insist it's more than a joke.

Indeed, the tale of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and its followers cuts to the heart of the one of the thorniest questions in religious studies: What defines a religion? Does it require a genuine theological belief? Or simply a set of rituals and a community joining together as a way of signaling their cultural alliances to others?

In short, is an anti-religion like Flying Spaghetti Monsterism actually a religion?

Gregoshi

11-16-2007, 23:02

A bunch of meatballs talking about people who've lost their noodles...interesting. The only question remaining is will they hit the sauce after the conference?

Andres

11-16-2007, 23:12

World's funniest joke no laughing matter! (http://icwales.icnetwork.co.uk/news/uk-news/page.cfm?objectid=12251019&method=full&siteid=50082)

And here it is:

The joke which received the highest global ratings was submitted by 31-year-old psychiatrist Gurpal Gosall, from Manchester.

It reads as follows: Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

Some other jokes:

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that!"

This was an example of American humour.

Texan: "Where are you from?"

Harvard graduate: "I come from a place where we do not end our sentences with prepositions."

Texan: "OK, where are you from, Jackass?"

An Alsatian went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog: "There are only nine words here. You could send another Woof for the same price." "But," the dog replied, "that would make no sense at all."

Andres

11-16-2007, 23:18

Watch out! He's got a stapler! (http://www.wtop.com/?nid=456&sid=1293276)

Police: Ky. Man Used Stapler to Rob Shop.

ASHLAND, Ky. (AP) - A man wearing a ski mask used a stapler to hold up an eastern Kentucky ice cream store _ and briefly got away with $175, authorities said.

Gerald A. Rocchi, 32, was arrested shortly after he flashed a chrome-plated stapler at an employee of The Ice Cream Shop in Ashland on Tuesday and demanded money, police said.

Ashland Police Capt. Don Petrella said he didn't know if Rocchi planned to shoot staples at the shop's employees or use it as a blunt instrument if he didn't get the cash.

It didn't come to that because the employees handed over the cash, Petrella said.

Several witnesses saw Rocchi leave the shop and told police where he was headed, Petrella said. After arresting Rocchi, police searched his house and found money, a stapler and a ski mask, Petrella said.

Petrella said the stapler's chrome finish could have made it look like a gun "if someone didn't get a good look at it."

Rocchi was charged with first-degree robbery. He made his first appearance in Boyd District Court on Wednesday morning. He did not have an attorney at the hearing.

Andres

11-16-2007, 23:27

Still remember the guy who loved his bicycle...? (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showpost.php?p=1728496&postcount=1146)

The Story of Bike Sex Man continues... (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/glasgow_and_west/7095134.stm)

Bike sex man placed on probation

A man caught trying to have sex with his bicycle has been sentenced to three years on probation.
Robert Stewart, 51, admitted a sexually aggravated breach of the peace by conducting himself in a disorderly manner and simulating sex.

Sheriff Colin Miller also placed Stewart on the Sex Offenders Register for three years.

Mr Stewart was caught in the act with his bicycle by cleaners in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr.

Gail Davidson, prosecuting, told Ayr Sheriff Court: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.

"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white t-shirt, naked from the waist down.

"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."

Both cleaners, who were "extremely shocked", told the hostel manager who called police.

Sheriff Colin Miller told Stewart: "In almost four decades in the law I thought I had come across every perversion known to mankind, but this is a new one on me. I have never heard of a 'cycle-sexualist'."

Stewart had denied the offence, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.

The bachelor had been living in the hostel since October 2006 after moving from his council house in Girvan.

He now lives in Ayr.