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View Full Version : 1 Word Story


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Scipio
12-05-2003, 01:49
as we commenced the raiding we found
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 01:50
large stores of treasure
Scipio
12-05-2003, 01:50
and cigarretes
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 01:51
as Horatio yelled "God blimey", the French were positioning guns to attack us
Scipio
12-05-2003, 01:51
luckli Ghandi came running in with a colt python
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 01:52
but was blown apart by a cannon
Scipio
12-05-2003, 01:53
but of coarse the french saw that Sk was wearing his napoleon hat still and rejoiced at the rebirth of theire dictator
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 01:54
and Hornblower got a marvelous idea and ordered Scipio to put on his Napoleon Hat also. Hornblower looked dashing in his Napoleon hat
Scipio
12-05-2003, 01:55
and the foolish french gave us all theire ciggerettes and treassure and we smoked till the day was old
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 01:55
laughing and joking of times gone past
Scipio
12-05-2003, 01:56
and when a new day commenced they started the rebuilding of the new ENGLISH speaking France where there was a statue of the three great
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 01:57
rulers: Horatio Hornblower, ruler of Northern and North-Eastern France, SilverKnight, ruler of Central and Eastern France, and Scipio, ruler of Southern and South-eastern France
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:00
So now they had to unite the rest of the world to speak english
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:00
Hornblower set about leading the Royal Navy to capture South America, but met with fierce resistance
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:01
So he just nuked them and rebuilt the place with a statue of him
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:04
"King Horatio I of South America", the statue's engraving said
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:08
And James made a statue in north america that read James king I of North America
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:10
a revolt led by Dessa in Australia almost crushed Hornblower's Army in the Battle of Dessaland, but the Army of Horatio won, and Australia was conquered
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:13
Dessa like Hannibe was a foe to go down in history as one of the biggest threats but unlike Hannible wasnt able to kill himself instead
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:15
Hornblower's Army soon conquered all of South Africa up to Congo, which he refused to conquer because of Ebola Virus
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:16
so he decided the only way was to force dessa to decontaminate the place using only a vacume and his tung(start licken) http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/tongue.gif
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:17
so Dessa caught Ebola Virus (where his organs turn to liquid blood and he died..poor Dessa..), and Hornblower's Armies were attacked by vicious Gorillas
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:19
luckilly the gorrilla warriors took in all the ebola virus and we were never harmed but we had to dump theire bodies in space for fear of contamination
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:20
and a siege which lasted 5 hours, on the town of Cangotawanakajimaopolipopolis (not a real town) cost the lives of several thousands of ants, 11 of Horatio's Soldiers, and one horseman
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:23
but at the end all were happy and another 3 person statue was built
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:24
every place conquered had the three-person statue holding the King's Colours, and the person who conquered the area had the largest portion of the statue
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:30
And now they had to choose a capital
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:31
Horatio chose Brest, in France, as his capitol.
King Chris took London (of course)
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:33
And James acting as a true Vancouverite chose VANCOUVEr as the capital of N.A.
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:33
Dessa swore alliegance to Horatio, and promised to pay him a yearly sum of money, to which Horatio was delighted
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:36
And James announced that no cars where to be used in NA due to pollution and that only tv computer health and food related electronicks could be used
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:37
Horatio announced the formation of the Horatioan Navy, which patrolled the seas and protected shipping of North America, Great Britain, and the Horatioan Empire
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:39
James followed up by asking his fellow Emperors to make 3 wonders in there part of the world
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:40
so Horatio built "The Golden Orb", a statue of him holding the imperial sceptre of Rome and wearing gartered robes of the Greeks
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:41
James built the Parthenon the coliseum and a mansion that was identical to ancient roman mansions
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:42
King Chris built "The Tribute to his Fellow Conquerors", a statue of Horatio, James, and Chris in Napoleonic Dress, holding swords, and looking proudly northwards
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:45
and finaly James said that we must build a huge statue where we combine our arts into the mega-capital of the world and he asked where should we put the worlds capital where we can have anual discussions about our pzart of the wiorld
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:49
Horatio suggested Brest, Chris suggested London
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:51
And James agreed nobily to London
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:52
Horatio agreed also, and in March, the first 3 Emperors Meeting was arranged in London, where tea and biscuits were served, along with classical music to accompany the discussions http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:53
and so after enough people had been nuked and enough languages removed the world was finally at peace
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:54
except for one problem: A major revolt in Australia led by Dessa's Son against Horatio. Horatio had very few men after quelling Australia, and was desperately in need of help
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:57
Buteveryone was short of weapons so James suggested that we went with pilum and the latest legionary army
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:58
Horatio and Chris looked at James, and then said at the same time "No"
Scipio
12-05-2003, 02:58
it was worth a try m8
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 02:59
Horatio then said: "I have some new muskets in New Zealand. Maybe we could fly there and outfit them on some men"
Scipio
12-05-2003, 03:00
And James said "as the far decendant of Scipio you can go with guns but the mounted police ride with pilum
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 03:01
Horatio looked at James and cocked one eyebrow..
"Yeah...you do that.."
Scipio
12-05-2003, 03:03
lol so as Dessa took the feild he brought out the guns and strted firing and was succeeding until James' outflank manoeuvre went succesfully and he suprised Dessa

p.s. When is this guy gunna die? http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/joker.gif
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 03:04
p.s.: NEVER http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/joker.gif
As Hornblower's men advanced the front, Hornblower himself was shot down, unconcious (here's where the drama begins) http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/eek.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif
Scipio
12-05-2003, 03:05
dessa was expecting a full out gun battle but he was in for a suprise
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 03:06
as the British Royal Horse Guards rode him down, but one of them almost ran over Hornblower
Scipio
12-05-2003, 03:08
the aussies did not give up but kept the fight until James recalled his men and went into the triplex acies
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 03:18
but then Hornblower regained conciousness and won the battle
Scipio
12-05-2003, 05:09
this was regarded as the wierdest battle of history
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 12:23
and
TheSilverKnight
12-05-2003, 14:49
Dessa cried for five minutes
gaelic cowboy
12-05-2003, 16:42
because hale berry was the sexiest woman in the world according to the holy FHM bible
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 18:24
when
Big King Sanctaphrax
12-05-2003, 18:26
the somewhat bizarre 2-man napoleonic high-jack of the one word story http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/dizzy.gif
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 18:35
charged
BDC
12-05-2003, 18:37
but fell off a cliff because this was the movie not the book
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 18:41
and
BDC
12-05-2003, 19:12
made it back to Helms Deep in time to be shot to bits by some advancing Napoleonic infantry lead by
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 19:16
an egghead
Skidrowpunk
12-05-2003, 19:59
with two fellow companions named
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 20:11
Usama and
Skidrowpunk
12-05-2003, 20:14
El Burro.
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 20:15
And
Skidrowpunk
12-05-2003, 20:19
the carrot went "Cowabunga" and said: It never goes away
Snowhobbit
12-05-2003, 20:22
with ( can you please answer my PM )
LittleGrizzly
12-06-2003, 00:27
a big
Snowhobbit
12-06-2003, 00:34
voice
Skidrowpunk
12-07-2003, 22:22
. Snowhobbit shrugged
Antalis::
12-07-2003, 23:03
and
Skidrowpunk
12-08-2003, 07:27
sang to the tones of the french national anthem.
Scipio
12-08-2003, 07:33
wich utterly
Snowhobbit
12-08-2003, 08:32
sounded
MongolWarrior
12-08-2003, 14:24
like
MongolWarrior
12-08-2003, 14:25
A dog
MongolWarrior
12-08-2003, 14:25
caught in
MongolWarrior
12-08-2003, 14:26
a folding
MongolWarrior
12-08-2003, 14:26
lawn chair(Gah)
Sir Moody
12-08-2003, 14:31
and with this awful sound
Snowhobbit
12-08-2003, 16:57
he
Sir Moody
12-08-2003, 16:59
was able to rout mankind
Snowhobbit
12-08-2003, 17:08
and
BDC
12-08-2003, 17:35
win the chalice of chastity but he then realised
Snowhobbit
12-08-2003, 17:39
that
Teutonic Knight
12-08-2003, 19:24
the ladies
Big King Sanctaphrax
12-08-2003, 19:49
liked a bit of
MongolWarrior
12-08-2003, 21:25
The Hulk( http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif )
The_Emperor
12-08-2003, 21:33
on viagra
Skidrowpunk
12-08-2003, 21:56
. The somewhat sarcastic squirrel
The_Emperor
12-08-2003, 23:47
taunted the Hulk
Scipio
12-09-2003, 01:13
so much that
Leet Eriksson
12-09-2003, 01:19
he made the squirrel into a pancake and..
Teutonic Knight
12-09-2003, 01:20
he had an

(must start with a vowel, preferably "e")
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:29
Epileptic Seizure(does that suit your needs TK?) http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/tongue.gif
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:32
which caused Hornblower to
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:33
have a fit
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:33
because mud got on his pants
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:34
so he
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:35
slapped his
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:36
agent
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:37
for not making mud-proof pants
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:38
meanwhile
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:38
Scipio conquered Mexico and began a long war with the US
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:39
wich caused Silver Knight
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:39
and Horatio Hornblower
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:40
to go
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:44
to the aid of Scipio
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:44
which
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:45
caused a stir in Hornblower's parliament
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:46
so he
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:46
killed a spy who tried to kill him
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:47
and then
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:49
a bell rang out because it was Scipio's birthday
dessa14
12-09-2003, 02:50
but then a man in black came up and smacked the two spammers in the head with a brick
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:51
wich was a made a huge(next word starts with Ho
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:52
Horatio Hornblower Crisis (hey, it starts with HO http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/tongue.gif ), and Horatio slammed Dessa on the back of the head with a large pie
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:52
so only Horatio and SilverKnight got slammed
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:53
wich was also declared a holiday
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 02:54
and the other 2 emperors got their own holidays, and Dessa got his own: "Dessa Day", where everyone burns fabric dolls that look like Dessa in a blue dress http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/tongue.gif
Scipio
12-09-2003, 02:55
And dessa meanwhile was locked in a big prison especially forhim
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:05
in which Horatio had the pleasure of whipping him
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:06
Dessa was sentenced
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:08
to five years of gas-chamber
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:08
no to mention
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:09
he gets to play knife games...with the guards http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:09
wich he always
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:10
enjoyed to some extent
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:10
until
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:11
Horatio Hornblower directed the games
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:12
and Haratio
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:12
grinned in delight and went to go watch Welsh Television shows http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:13
with
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:15
Pobol Y Cym on, he couldn't miss the new episode
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:17
after it was over
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:19
he came back to find
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:19
dessa
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:20
had vomited
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:21
all over
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:21
the guards
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:23
so horatio
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:23
slapped Dessa with a glove
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:24
and told him
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:24
I challenge you to a duel..but I must win
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:25
so dessa foolishly accepted
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:26
and was defeated because of tiredness
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:27
So this day was made a ho....
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:27
Horatio Hornblower Holiday (triple H), one of the 10 he already has named after him
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:28
the other including
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:29
Navy Day, Horatio Hornblower in Africa Day, Conqueror Day, Liberator Day, and so on
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:30
But Sk and Scipio felt cheated out so they made
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:31
2 more holidays for themselves, England Day, and Canada Day
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:32
but they couldnt make it Canada day because that alredy exists so they called it
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:32
Scipio Day
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:33
and everybody
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:34
was happy
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:35
except
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:35
for Dessa
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:36
but that didnt bother Scipio and SK
TheSilverKnight
12-09-2003, 03:41
and Horatio Hornblower
Scipio
12-09-2003, 03:48
because they are on top of the world (metaphorically and literally speaking)
Efrem Da King
12-09-2003, 09:58
Until of course they weren't
Snowhobbit
12-09-2003, 13:36
down
The_Emperor
12-09-2003, 13:37
because
MongolWarrior
12-09-2003, 14:40
A meteor hit the earth and killed everyone except Dessa. http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
MongolWarrior
12-09-2003, 14:40
So Dessa
MongolWarrior
12-09-2003, 14:41
turned into
MongolWarrior
12-09-2003, 14:43
Michael Jackson http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif
Snowhobbit
12-09-2003, 17:26
and
Skidrowpunk
12-09-2003, 17:44
the little guinea pig did
The_Emperor
12-09-2003, 18:47
something very nasty in his bed
Teutonic Knight
12-09-2003, 23:49
that involved

(let us never let this thread get that far down on the page again http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/eek.gif )
Leet Eriksson
12-10-2003, 00:01
Micheal Jackson and some kid...
TheSilverKnight
12-10-2003, 00:12
against Horatio Hornblower
Scipio
12-10-2003, 03:58
it wasnt
Teutonic Knight
12-10-2003, 04:04
a big old

(are you completely obsessed with HH TSN?)
TheSilverKnight
12-10-2003, 04:11
Quote[/b] (Teutonic Knight @ Dec. 09 2003,21:04)]a big old

(are you completely obsessed with HH TSN?)
(@ TK: Yes I am http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif )

wart
Efrem Da King
12-10-2003, 06:31
However.
Snowhobbit
12-10-2003, 09:07
an
Efrem Da King
12-10-2003, 10:06
monkey
The Wizard
12-10-2003, 11:21
going to Spongebob Squarepants
TheSilverKnight
12-10-2003, 15:35
attacked
Paxx
12-10-2003, 15:46
the
Sir Moody
12-10-2003, 15:54
New York Times Building
Skidrowpunk
12-10-2003, 16:22
with a kazoo
Sir Moody
12-10-2003, 16:33
bursting
Scipio
12-10-2003, 17:08
its
Snowhobbit
12-10-2003, 17:57
windows
Skidrowpunk
12-10-2003, 18:08
with a radical method of being such an ugly kazoo
Snowhobbit
12-10-2003, 18:24
when
Skidrowpunk
12-10-2003, 18:26
a satanistic group (weren't you supposed to work??)
Snowhobbit
12-10-2003, 18:27
decided (All work and no play is sooooooo boring) http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
The Wizard
12-10-2003, 20:32
to disect some frogs that were actually princes
Teutonic Knight
12-10-2003, 20:55
Quote[/b] (Efrem Da King @ Dec. 10 2003,04:06)]e-monkey
("an" must be followed by a vowel&#33http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif
Dhepee
12-10-2003, 20:58
Quote[/b] (Wizzy @ Dec. 10 2003,14:32)]to disect some frogs that were actually princes
but the princes
Demon of Light
12-10-2003, 22:47
was run over by the Governor of South Dakota.
Dhepee
12-10-2003, 22:51
who was wearing
Teutonic Knight
12-10-2003, 23:02
something skanky and revealing that showed
Dhepee
12-10-2003, 23:03
a tattoo of
Teutonic Knight
12-10-2003, 23:05
a very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very large
Sir Moody
12-10-2003, 23:10
picture of Dessa doing
Dhepee
12-10-2003, 23:33
the funky chicken
Teutonic Knight
12-10-2003, 23:36
with a a very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very large woman named
Scipio
12-11-2003, 01:01
Isla
Sir Moody
12-11-2003, 01:15
Von
Scipio
12-11-2003, 01:16
this incriminating photo was posted on
TheSilverKnight
12-11-2003, 01:54
"The Royal Navy Forums", where Scipio and SilverKnight found it
Scipio
12-11-2003, 01:57
and laughed for about
TheSilverKnight
12-11-2003, 02:12
25 minutes
Scipio
12-11-2003, 02:28
wich wasnt half as long as
Sir Moody
12-11-2003, 02:33
the time we laughed at scipios
Scipio
12-11-2003, 02:48
the laugh at scipio was of coarse in recognition for his hard work for office http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
TheSilverKnight
12-11-2003, 02:54
and Horatio Hornblower choked on a doughnut
Scipio
12-11-2003, 02:57
wich was a choke showing that he respected scipio(while he started to hork all the doughnut out)
Teutonic Knight
12-11-2003, 03:35
who was thinking that while Horatio Hornblower is an incredible piece of literature, TheSilverKnight should stop talking about it...
dessa14
12-11-2003, 03:37
but then dessa snuck up behind both Silverknight and Scipio and SMACK off goes both of their heads with shattered neck vertebrate dessa stood there triumphant with his bloody kookaburra cricket bat.
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 09:40
when
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 15:38
Dessa realized that he was in the wrong spam thread, this is 1 Word Story not Tavern Brawl, and gave his cricket bat to
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 15:39
snowhobbit
The Wizard
12-11-2003, 15:40
upon which he smashed Horatio Hornblower into oblivion
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 16:18
and
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 16:29
removed
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 16:37
George W Bush
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 16:54
and
Scipio
12-11-2003, 17:04
went on to
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 17:14
smell
Scipio
12-11-2003, 17:18
a horrible
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 17:22
stench of
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 17:52
candy
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 18:01
rotting
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 18:02
and
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 18:05
tulips
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 18:10
thus
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 18:17
proving
Matt Deckard
12-11-2003, 18:20
lighter fuel
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 18:22
and a bowl of cherries
Matt Deckard
12-11-2003, 18:24
can provide you with
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 18:32
many
Matt Deckard
12-11-2003, 18:39
dreams which
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 18:44
concure
Matt Deckard
12-11-2003, 18:52
that lemmings
scudknight
12-11-2003, 18:55
defacate
Dhepee
12-11-2003, 18:56
before they jump
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 18:59
and
Matt Deckard
12-11-2003, 19:00
liquify
Snowhobbit
12-11-2003, 19:01
a